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Chapter 3

Fear was a constant emotion to her. It was the one emotion she was familiar with. She was introduced to it since day one. She rarely felt happiness. She never felt hope. Only fear. A constant reminder of how weak she was. A constant reminder of how cruel human beings can be. A constant reminder that those with power always mistreat those below them. It was a reminder to her.

It's been just one day since she experienced the emotion last. Now it's back. Why did it have to come back? Why couldn't she continue to be happy? Everything was going good. She had everything she thought she never would have. She had a mother. Nozomi adopted her. She lived with her now. She had her own room, that was decorated to her liking. She had books and nice clothes. A warm bed. She was allowed to leave it when she wished. She was allowed to eat when she wished. She was given food she had never had before. Before it was only water and bread. Sometimes milk. Nozomi made her some strawberry milkshake. It was the sweetest thing she ever tasted. She never had something like that. She actually cried tears of joy when she first had a taste of the beverage. Nozomi had panicked at first. She didn't know why she was crying. She didn't know that she never had a milkshake before. When she found out she hated the orphanage even more than she did before. That day she took her out for ice cream. She made her pancakes with chocolate syrup and whipped cream. Kuriko got to experience so much in just one day. She was happy.

But then Nozomi said she had to go to school. It was the law after all. She couldn't Homeschool her for various reasons so she would need to attend a kindergarten. The minute that was announced to her she almost broke down. She would have to be around people. People she didn't know. People don't tend to like her. She was too different. People don't like those who are different. It's sad, but true. So very true. She would know it. She never had a friend in her life. No one was there for her. Nozomi was the first to care and even then she was scared it would all end. She didn't want to go to school but she had to. Nozomi reassured her that everything would be alright. She would sign her into a good school.

Her words of reassurance did nothing. Kuriko knew she would be targeted. She knew she could not attend school without being subjected to bullies.

She knew it.

She was right.

They came after her the first chance they got.

They're words were like knives. Each time they spoke they teared open a wound or reopened an old one. She didn't want to hear any of it. She had heard those words many times. She hated them, but she could do nothing. She was weak. She always was and always will be. Why couldn't it end? Why did they have to be like this? What did she ever do to deserve this?

Their words hurt. Whoever said words couldn't hurt lied. They lied. Words do hurt. It hurts a lot. She didn't know if it was because of their negative meaning or because of the fact that she could never form words. Maybe it's a little bit of both. All she knew was that she didn't like it.

Someone pushed her. Her head hit a rock when she fell. Tears stung in the back of her eyes and she could feel the blood leaving the new wound. More blood. Her blood. It's always her blood. She always ends up bleeding. She always ends up hurt. She always ends up broken. And no one gave an inch. Why?

Because she was voiceless. Who would listen to her? Who would care about someone who couldn't do something as simple as talk?

No one.

When they saw blood, they ran. They left her there, bleeding. She didn't care. She couldn't care. She couldn't focus. The pain was burning. Her head hurt very badly. She was losing more blood with each passing second and she could do nothing about it. It wouldn't be long before she loses consciousness. She wondered if she would wake up this time . She had said that she didn't want to die. No matter how unfair this world was. She didn't want to die, but at that moment the thought seemed appealing. Maybe it's best she die. She should just leave this cruel world. No one would care. Nozomi would, but she would soon forget her like everyone else.

She started to see familair black spots in her vision. It was hard to keep her eyes open and she didn't bother fighting it. She closed her eyes and let familiar darkness wrap around her. It was oddly safe. Maybe it's because she visits this darkness often.

Alone again.

She will forever be alone. No one will understand. No one will know what it's like. No one would hear her.

The world was imperfect and any who believe otherwise are delirious fools.

This world prides itself on its heroes? Where were the heroes when she needed them?

There was no such thing as a hero. One cannot save everyone. There will always be the outcasts. The ones no one realizes need saving. The ones no one cares about enough to save. The ones they don't see because society makes them blind.

Why is it the ones that really need the heroes are the ones left to suffer alone?

She couldn't understand.

~~~~~~~~~

Nozomi almost fell out of her car as she rushed into the hospital. Kuriko was in the hospital again. She went through the same thing again. After she promised her everything would be ok. Her heart hurt knowing that nothing would ever be ok. It hurt because she knew Kuriko did not believe her words. It hurt knowing that she could do nothing. She could do nothing to protect her. She couldn't always be there. There will always be people who can not understand those different from them. There will always be those who feel themselves higher than others. There will always be those who enjoy inflicting pain. That is just how the world is and there was nothing she could do to protect Kuriko from it.

It was a painful realization.

She rushed past administration and immediately rushed into the elevator. Her hand was shaking as she quickly pressed the number of the floor she needed to be on. How could this happen again? Why did this happen again?

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It felt like hours as she waited in that elevator. So many thoughts ran though her mind. She was praying for Kuriko's safety . Please be that's she's alright. She has to be. She's so strong. She made it through the last ordeal. She'll have to make it through this one. She can do it. Nozomi told herself this over and over.

The minute the doors of the elevator opened she was walking as fast as her heels would let her. Her eyes scanned every room number until she found the one . She didn't calm herself enough to knock on the door. She just threw it open. Her eyes immediately fell on the unconscious Kuriko. She was dressed in a hospital gown and had her head bandaged up. She hit her head. She was informed of the injury by doctor Akatsuki. She again lost too much blood and it's a miracle she's alive. Nozomi let out a shuddering breath and slowly closed the door behind her. She was trying very hard to hold back her tears as she stood next to Kuriko's bed. She was plugged into a cardiogram again. Blood was being transfered to her to make sure her heart kept beating.

"Why must you always suffer? You don't deserve this" Nozomi said quietly as she ran her hand through curly hair. She didn't deserve any of it. Just when she was finally happy. She forced her eyes shut to keep the building tears at bay.

Why?

She fell into the chair right under her and let out another breath. Why? The one question on her mind at the moment. She stared at the hands in her lap. Her hands. They were shaking. She clasped them together in an effort to stop the action. Stay calm. She was taught to remain calm. She remembered those lessons. The times her father would explain. Demonstrate. Teach. One must be calm. No matter what you face. No matter what you come up against. Remain calm. Calm brings rational thought and might just keep you alive in the cold world.

She looked back up when she saw movement. Ice blue eyes were staring at the ceiling. They were clouded, yet shining with so many emotions. Sadness. She read sadness in those eyes. Sadness and pain. She wished those emotions weren't so familair to the young girl. It hurt seeing her like this. Her father always said she had a soft heart. She couldn't help it. She could only imagine the thoughts running through Kuriko's head. The sorrow. The pain.

Those emotions shouldn't be the main feature of a child's life.

"Kuriko" Nozomi took a small hand in her own. Kuriko didn't look at her. It was as if she didn't hear her. As if she didn't acknowledge her. "Kuriko, please look at me" she pleaded. Kuriko must hate her. She could have kept her home a few more days. She could've taken days off work and spend time with her. She knew she was scared to go to school. She was afraid such a thing would happen again. It was obvious but she still sent her

Blue eyes looked at her and her heart clenched. She felt the tears threaten to fall as She rested her head on the bed.

"I'm sorry"

She's apologizing again. Kuriko could only watch her fight the tears. She was on the verge of tears for her. She was sorry she had to experience such pain and fear again. Why? She didn't need to feel sorry. She didn't need cry for her.

She didn't need to care.

So why does she? Kuriko couldn't wrap her head around it. What's the point, right? She Would laugh if she could. What's the point in caring about her? She'll only bring pain to Nozomi's life. She was bound to end up in the hospital again. She was bound to end up in the same situation. This would happen again. Nozomi would feel sorry again. She would cry again. She would hurt again.

All because she cared.

Pain comes no matter what. It's part of life. Some just suffer through more than others. She was that unlucky person.

It's sad.

It hurts.

It would not end.

She could do nothing.

She was weak.

She is weak.

She will always be weak.

Pathetic. Useless.

Voiceless.

She hated it.

"I'll pull you out of that school"

What's the point? She'll have to go to another and it would be the same thing again. Nozomi is trying , but there's no changing what they both know to be true.

So why try in the first place?

Kuriko looked back to the ceiling. She could shed no tears no matter how much they stung at the back of her eyes. Maybe she had cried to much.

She closed her eyes again.

Life can be so unbearable.

~~~~~~

Nozomi was watching Kuriko. She was in the living room reading one of the books she had next to her. She didn't know what type of book she was focused on, but at least she was occupied. Nozomi had to find another school for her. She couldn't sign her into the one her nephew went to anymore because her brother moved to America and naturally took the boy with him. Also she had called the school and they had calmly told her that they were not trained to handle children such as Kuriko.

Nozomi couldn't believe that. They could handle kids with no control of their quirks, but a mute brings a promblem?

She found another school. They promised to make sure Kuriko fits in and does not end up being bullied again. She hoped they kept that promise.

The sound of the doorbell snapped her out of her thoughts. When Kuriko heard the sound she collected all her books and awkwardly made her way up the stairs and towards her bedroom. She didn't want to meet someone new. Her anxiety wouldn't allow her. Not after what happened that very day. She was surprised she was allowed to go home so soon. Oh well. Her head still hurts though and she needs to keep the bandage on. She wouldn't be going back to school until her wound is fully healed.

Nozomi had a sad look in her eyes as she watched Kuriko go up the stairs. She couldn't force her to meet her friend. She would have to come around on her own. She'll have to be patient.

"You look a mess"

The very first words her friend said to her when she opened the door. Nozomi couldn't help but smile despite everything.

"Hey Nemuri, it's good to see you again" Nozomi stepped aside and let the woman in.

"Where's the kid? "

"She went up stairs when she heard the doorbell"

Nemuri nodded in understanding as she eyed the stairs. She was told about Kuriko and her mental status. She understood she would not be comfortable around her. She would not trust her. Not after everything she went through. It was sad. A child shouldn't have gone through such things.

"How are you holding up? "

Nozomi looked to the floor for a minute.

"You want the truth? "

Nemuri nodded with a bittersweet smile.

"Well, I'm not doing so good. She keeps getting hurt. Today was her first day attending kindergarten. I told her everything was going to be ok . She didn't believe me and she was right not to. Look what happened. Some little bastards decided to bully her. She could have died. Again. And I can't do anything about this. It will happen again, no matter what school I send her to" Nozomi clasped her hands together tightly as she tried to keep herself calm. "What hurts is the fact that she knows this. She knows I can't do anything. She knows things won't change so easily . She knows and it hurts"

Nemuri didn't know what to say so she did the one thing she could. She wrapped her arms around her sorrowful friend and pulled her into a warm hug. She felt Nozomi fall into her and giggled. She's always been like that. She would go practically limb in her arms and just enjoy it.

"Do you know who the bullies are? "

"Yes, she wrote down their names"

"What did you do? "

"I got ahold of their parents number. They refused to believe their children harmed Kuriko. They wanted proof because apparently I could be lying and trying to get ahold of some money" Nozomi scoffed. "I arranged a meeting with them and the doctor. Of course I'll be there as well"

"What about Kuriko? "

"She doesn't want to be present. She doesn't want anything to do with them or the parents "

"She's not a fan of people is she? "

"People haven't been very nice to her"

"You just make sure to be there for her. Things will turn around at some point"

"I hope so"