THIRTEEN

It was snowing. Wyn looked out the window at the snowflakes. It was the first snowfall of the year and Wyn felt lonely.

Raif had moved out. He was back down the hall with Trevor, and not a day went by that Wyn didn’t think about how that day could have gone if he hadn’t had to go. She didn’t call him. She didn’t know what to say. If she thought it had been annoying to have him ignore her before they moved in together, it was far worse to have him notice her after he had moved out.

His hazel eyes fixed on her and his gaze took all of her in. Sometimes his eyes were so inviting, she accidentally took a few steps toward him. Sometimes, he looked so lonely, she wanted to sit next to him. His desire to have her near him was all over him, like nothing else about him mattered anymore.

She resisted him completely.

Muriel came into the apartment. “Wyntessa, are you here?”

“Yep.”

She handed her a parcel.

“Where did this come from?” Wyn asked.

“It’s from Raif. He stopped me in the hall and insisted that I give it to you.”

Wyn tore the brown paper. It was a pair of white mittens with a note attached that read, ‘For the first snowfall. And number five under the list I named ‘Acts that Prove I’m not a Selfish Jerk.’’

Wyn chuckled. He was still making her tiny wishes come true.

She slid the soft knitting over her fingers.

He’d get bored. He found her boring once, she was sure he’d find her boring again. He might even start dating again.

That was what she thought until the next item arrived. It was earmuffs and though she didn’t want to admit it, she loved them and wore them every day. He sent her hand-warmers, slippers, and socks. He sent her packets of hot chocolate and apple cider.

The next time she saw him looking at her across the library, she couldn’t ignore him any longer. She stumbled over to him, and the couch he sat on. Without any word escaping her lips, she sat next to him, dropping herself into the crook of his arm. That first time, she cried a little. He tightened his arm around her and said nothing. He just held her and felt what she was feeling with her.

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She stayed until an alarm on her phone rang. Having someplace she had to be, she rose from the sofa. Raif helped her stand. He hugged her, she hugged him, and without a word, she wandered away.

She wanted to thank him, for thinking of her, for still trying to fulfill his promise to her, for loving her from a distance, and for giving her space to think.

If he knew everything, just by looking at her, then he certainly knew she wanted him to stop sending her presents. They made her want him… badly.

Wishes continued to come true.

One time, she went to the library, intending to pay her library fees only to find that they had been paid by a very attractive young man. The librarian gushed. She’d never witnessed such a romantic act in all her years.

Neither had Wyn.

Paying her library dues had not been an item she had listed in the jar.

Truthfully, he had barely scratched the surface of the food she’d asked him to bring her and over the weeks, he brought her giant cookies, muffins, strawberry shortcake, and a dozen other treats. He must have been making a study of it because each item was better than the last.

It climaxed at Christmas when he decorated her balcony with Christmas decorations so wonderful, Wyn thought her heart would burst.

She couldn’t ignore him any longer or try to pretend that what happened between them wasn’t special.

From that point onwards, if she caught him looking at her, she no longer tried to hide or run away.

If he was on a couch, she’d drop next to him and rest her head on his shoulder. He’d put his arm around her and place a kiss on the top of her head. If he was standing in line somewhere, she’d come up beside him and put her hand in his.

But she didn’t talk to him. She couldn’t talk to him when she didn’t know the answer. He knew and didn’t press her. He continued giving her gifts, sometimes he wrote her letters he pushed under her door. They were full-on love letters, but they never asked for anything, just breathed his love for her.

One time, a few of Raif’s friends were there for their ritual. They saw each other. Wyn shuffled over. Without saying hello, he caught her and held her with an air of tragedy surrounding them.

“What is happening?” Raif’s friend, Jonathan asked their other friend, Andy.

“They’re in love, but he’s moving to the north end of the Northwest Territories at the end of April. They don’t want to get too attached, so they don’t date and they don’t talk. They just look at each other all hungry and then cuddle for a bit.”

“That doesn’t seem healthy,” Jonathan observed.

“It might not be,” Andy replied. “But I’ve never been in a relationship that’s lasted as long as theirs.”

“She should just go with him.”

Andy snorted. “Would you go with him?”

“Heck no, but I am not that chick, who is looking at him all dewy-eyed and biting his shirt. Like she’s going to notice twenty-four hours of sunlight or midnight.”

Wyn heard Jonathan talking. Yes, she was biting the shoulder seam of Raif’s shirt, but that level of intimacy felt so normal by Valentine’s Day that she didn’t realize it was a symptom.

She slowly gathered up her things and left. She went home to Muriel, who was dating Trevor again, although not living with him. She opened her laptop and decided it was time to embrace something different.