Chapter 2

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Four long days have passed since my arrival at Lionheart military base, spent on nothing but daily exercises and drinking. I got to know my team better - what made them laugh, what made them relaxed. I met Jean for the first time - the man Arthur mentioned on my first visit, distinguishable by his beige beret. His looks were rather uncommon - he was slender, possessing a short, ginger hair, cut just above his ears which exposed his pale skin, and eyes that reminded me of bright violets. He was the quiet type - always keeping to himself, his gaze lost somewhere away from everyone else’s. He only spoke when he had to, avoiding small talk whenever he could. It was clear Arthur did not lie to me before - something must have happened to him in those tall, chilling mountains. It was best not to open his old wounds.

Just as we expected, the war had started with the Teuroran Union’s forces crossing the Galvanian border, our army opening fire on unsuspecting soldiers stationed near it, spilling innocent blood. Our divisions marched right through their defenses with little resistance - Galvanians did not expect war, at least not that soon. We waited one more day before being deployed. None of us seemed enthusiastic about the conflict - maybe except for Arthur and Kate, although I had a feeling they just tried to hide their true feelings and act tough. The rest of us grew anxious - the moment finally came. It was no longer training and empty promises, we were to become a part of something bigger, and that was what scared us. I felt ready to fulfill my duty - keep my word. The day was tenth of March, 1942. Our team was sent to Galvanian mountains as a part of Section Alpha to join other teams in the field and help them with their operations. Nothing but scouting - they called it a patrol. We just had to make sure no unwanted visitors roamed the area our other troops took the other day. Sounded easy enough.

* * *

I leaned over an old, wooden fence which separated me from a long fall down the hill, crossing my arms on it. It creaked under my weight, clearly showing its age. I felt a shiver go down my spine the moment I heard it, but the railing stood firmly, making it easier for me to enjoy the view. We were here. In front of me, an old and large, yet short mountain pass stretched over the horizon, taking up my entire view. Forests of pine and spruce laid at its base, contrasting wildly with the bare, snowed peaks, only rarely interrupted by roads and singular wooden huts, some of them still having smoke leaving their chimneys, illuminated by a freshly set sun. The tranquility of this place captivated me. I felt I could spend hours upon hours, doing nothing but gazing into the landscape worthy of a painting. I wondered how he would find this place, if he was still with me. I wondered how it would feel to spend time here with those close to you. Would they also cherish this moment? Or would they rather...

- Eliza, stop sightseeing, this is an active combat zone! - I heard George shout with a frustrated voice right behind my back, scaring me a bit. Guess that’s what would happen if I brought any significant other here, if I had one at the time. I turned around to face him, leaving one of my elbows resting. He held his machine gun in one hand, beckoning me with his free one.

- How is it active if nobody shot us yet? - I asked, raising one corner of my lips before leaving the hazardous fencing and coming closer. - We’ve been waiting for half an hour now. I doubt they’re going to show up.

- You’ll be shot first if you don’t pay attention, corporal. But you’re right. Twos are late to the party. Don’t like the look of that. - he looked, visibly concerned, in the direction where we came from, seeing nothing but an almost empty road where we parked our truck and a clear horizon.

- Something had to stop them. Maybe they’re sight seeing as well?

- Or they’re dead. You can pick either one. Now watch the tree line, unless you want some Galvanians to sneak up on us.

I was startled every time I’ve heard the term “Death”, no matter the context. I remembered hearing the same words over and over: “It’s war - we could be dead tomorrow”, but I did not want to believe it. I was a part of Squad Four now. I was to protect them. That was a promise I’ve made when joining the military - make sure everyone survives it. I couldn’t break it. They had to live, no matter what.

I sighed deeply and unslung my rifle from my shoulder, gripping it firmly in both of my hands, pressing the stock towards my shoulder. We were to meet with Squad Two on this peaceful hill long ago, but there was no sign of them. Just silence. I kept hearing Arthur try to contact them through our big, blocky radio standing right next to our parked truck, but to no avail. It was just us and the birds chirping happily, wind softly moving the branches of trees on one of our sides, howling in the canyon beneath us on the other one. It was quiet. On a normal day, I would embrace the tranquility of this magical place, spend time here with no worries. Today, I felt nothing but trembling on my back, constant stress that consumed me, my senses forcing me to stay alert at every moment. I did not wish to admit it, but George was right - we had no idea when, and if, someone was to find us. We only knew what they would do to us. Not everyone felt the same way, however.

- It’s no use. - said Arthur, leaning on the truck with his palm left open. - Been ten minutes, they said nothing. They can’t be making barbecue alone, we’re bringing the fire after all, right?

- Doing what? - asked him Kate, staring at him in confusion. - What fire? You cannot possibly be talking about yourself?

- I- Look, Kate, I’m saying they have the meat for the fire. Get it? Meat? Fire? Barbecue?... - he answered, standing up properly, moving his hands with energy.

- What are you even blabbering about? - her eyelids lowered significantly - You keep your heat down before it burns you.

- Like that’s gonna happen, girl! Walked through enough fires to get here, what’s one more mark?

The two exploded with laughter shortly afterwards, most probably realizing how nonsensical their conversation was, only stopping once George promptly told them to shut up. That was their way to relieve tension, I supposed, as we still had no idea what to do or where to go. We resorted to waiting. With time, even the wind began to sound threatening, spelling imminent threat. We waited for a bit longer. Nothing happened. Just the wind and birds. It was beginning to be too much for me. I turned my face over to Jean, standing slightly further away from the others. He was a loner, as always, not interested in our affairs in the slightest. I called out to him, asked him if he felt anything wrong. No response, unless the twitch of his head was supposed to tell me something. Too focused? Perhaps he was. I walked a few steps closer to the railing, taking a quick peek at the scenery again. I had to ease my mind somehow. Before I could notice, Beatrice came up to me, gazing off in the same direction as I was .

- They’re pretty, aren’t they? - She asked me out of the blue. - I wish I had time to draw them. It’s my first time seeing… This.

- You mean the mountains? - I answered, tilting my head towards her - Yeah. They’re beautiful. I only miss the crystals I saw up north.

- Crystals? My sister’s told me we would see a lot of them here. They’re the reason this war was declared, right? The Union’s running low, and they need to take them from whoever’s the closest, or the weakest…

- Well… Officially, we’re here to ‘liberate the citizens of Galvania from a fascist rule that enslaved them for years’, or something. But seeing how we first tried to take Kristjoll from its people right after the first rumors about Union running low on Cyberian started... I think you might be right.

- Cyberian? Is that how you call them? The minerals? - her eyes widened as her hands lowered, completely straightening her elbows. - We just named them… Magic rocks. I- I know it sounds stupid, but that’s how we rolled with it. Everyone in our town knew exactly what we meant.

I snorted under my nose, bringing my eyes to a close for a second. “Magic rocks” was the worst name for Cyberian that I could think of, yet it described them well. These crystals became a part of our everyday lives as soon as humanity discovered them. Blue and cold to the touch, they were just as beautiful, sparkling under the moonlight like a clear lake, as they were durable, harder than any steel known to man. Some people claimed the crystals could heal their own wounds, regenerating their damaged form. Some claimed Cyberian was alive, feeling the world just like we did, growing over time, developing emotions. I believed it to be nonsense. A crystal could not live. It was nothing but a material for humanity to shape into their visions, no matter how twisted. Yet some people insisted on proving their ways, some of them even worshipping it like it was a gift from God to humanity. I believed them to be insane. There was no such thing. The undeniable truth, however, was that it revolutionized life as we know it. Ever since the ancient ages, people have learned to use it - mold it into their tools and weapons, build their homes and their armors, heal the sick with various potions or kill their foes with deadly poisons. Nature’s most wonderful creation which could bring life just as easily as it could take it.

Out of sudden, our conversation was interrupted as I heard gunfire coming from the recently quiet tree line. Shots started landing close to us. I grabbed Beatrice and headed for cover, just like everyone else did. I hid behind a tree as I heard the sound of a whip cracking passing by my ear. This place was not ideal, but there was no better one nearby. Beatrice laid low just by me, crouching behind a fallen log crudely removed from the road, while the others used the truck and large enough rocks. This was the moment of truth. I could not fail them. Not a single one of them. I strengthened my grip on the rifle, wishing for it not to fail me. I had to wait for the right moment. Every few seconds, I heard another shot aimed at me, landing dangerously close to where I was, ripping off the tree bark piece by piece, landing its remains on the ground, then a moment of silence, only disturbed by others exchanging bullets. My heart could not stop beating like crazy, even if I tried to control my pulse, slow it down. I had to act - I had to kill so I would not be killed. One peek at a wrong time could bring my end. I waited until the next pause, stock pried to my shoulder. I thought I knew where he was. I just had to hit. Just a moment longer. Now.

I put one of my feet outside of my hiding spot, leaning my body to accompany it. I felt the adrenaline rush through my veins. I had my rifle raised, ready to be aimed at the treeline as I glanced at the enemy. My eye met the scope as I lined up the shot, breathing in, trying to hold it in for as long as I could. He was crouched behind the large, grey stone, loading more rounds into his weapon, thinking he was safe. He lifted his head up again after a moment, hoping to follow up with his gun, but I was quicker. I pulled the trigger, my crosshair placed exactly on his face which lit up with fear in the last moment of his life. I heard a hollow scream, saw blood run from the wound I created, his lifeless body fell to the ground, his cold hands dropped the rifle onto the grass, now tinted red. I retreated behind the tree with haste as soon as I witnessed it. I looked at my hands. They were trembling. My whole body was trembling as I came to realize what I’ve done. I killed him. I killed a man. In just a split second, I pressed the trigger and he was gone. I felt something come up to my throat. It was not the end, however. The battle still raged on as my squad still returned fire, gunshots lighting up beneath the trees. I had no time to think, I had no time to accept my transgression. I had to act. I had to kill so they would not be killed. I moved my right hand towards the bolt and took hold of it. Lift it, pull it back, load another round. Just that easily, I could shoot again. I could take another life.

I heard no shots coming my way, but there was no certainty. I peeked my head a bit to make sure. It was risky, but I had to confirm my situation. I was relatively safe. The other two men were busy pinning down the others who took refuge behind our vehicle, blindly returning fire. I had to do it - again and again. I raised my gun again, aimed straight at the man with his side exposed, unaware that his comrade was felled just a mere moment ago. Another deep breath. I clenched my teeth and fired. He went down quickly, just as violently as the previous one. The one by him shouted as he turned towards me, now aware of the threat I presented. I grabbed the bolt again, wishing to reload before he could take aim-

Shot. I looked up and saw him stand as he stood, blood dripping down his forehead. He collapsed in just a moment, falling backwards onto the grassy, solid ground. The blood-soaked battlefield fell silent, even the birds having fled the forest. I turned around to see her. Beatrice held her rifle aimed right where he stood, her hands shaking intensely. Her mouth was open again. A tear fell down her shocked face, leaving a visible trail on her soft, freckled cheek.

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- Clear! - shouted Jean after a minute of silence. Everyone left their cover and looked around, George taking a risk to check the bodies. Everyone but her. I lowered my rifle and approached her slowly, putting my hand on her shoulder as I got close. She jumped, frightened, immediately turning her head towards me. She tried to say something. She couldn’t.

- You did a good job. - I simply told her, trying to keep my voice gentle, avoid it cracking. I was as scared as she was. I knew I couldn’t show it, however. I wanted to make sure those people knew they could depend on me, that I would not break so easily.

- I… Killed him. - she said, aiming her rifle at the ground, her eyes wandering all over my face, her voice leaving no doubt about her true feelings. - I didn’t want to, Eliza, I just… Didn’t…

- Nice shooting, champs! - exclaimed Arthur, approaching us. - I could say you saved our asses just now. Tell you what, once we’re back home, drinks are on me.

I understood something just then. We all took it differently. Arthur seemed not phased by what happened in the slightest, holding an awkward smile on his face, just like the others. Maybe they were experienced. They knew what the war was about. The risks, the deaths they witnessed. Maybe they tried to act tough just like I did, afraid to let others down. Maybe they just haven’t killed yet. Perhaps we were the first ones in the squad to do so, except for George, his scars talking for himself. I would be glad to pass the honor to someone else.

- Uh… Thanks, Sarge. - I said, not letting my hand go off Beatrice. I doubted she wanted to be rewarded for what she had just done. I think Arthur noticed it, as his smile was quickly swept away by a more concerned expression.

- You two alright? Carrot… Bea seems to be shivering hard. Do you need a moment?

- I’m fine. Not the first time I killed. - I said without hesitation. Until that day, I would not believe I was capable of taking a life. I lied to him, but for our own good. There was a bit of truth in my dishonesty, however. I had witnessed death already.

- Wow. Alright then, killer, won’t ask again. - Arthur put his hands up and shrugged before walking off towards the rest of the group, probably to check on them as well. Beatrice did not stop shaking, but her breath soothed slightly. I slowly moved my arm away, keen on giving her more space. Her head bowed down almost lifelessly as she made her way after him, one foot after the other. I wished I could tell her something to make her feel better. She was stunned, afraid of what she had done, just like I was - the only difference is how we showed it. I imagined her thinking I was a monster which took a life with no remorse. She believed I felt nothing when pulling the trigger, that it was something mundane for me. I wished to correct her, but I could not commit to it for as long as others were nearby, as I was unwilling to show them my true face. I had to stay strong - for them.

George returned, having checked the bodies. He told us they were all low-ranking scouts, carrying nothing on themselves but what they were issued. It meant there were more of them nearby. It explained the fate of Squad Two as well - they were not as lucky as us, probably fallen victim to the enemy. I really hoped it was not the case, however. I wished for them to be safe, but I knew no prayer could change reality.

- Radio’s working, sarge. - Informed Kate, giving the talking box a slap. - By some miracle it was not hit! Truck’s busted, though, so we’re not moving.

- What would I do without you, Kate? Thanks. - he answered swiftly, approaching the wooden table right next to the vehicle now filled with bullets, most of its tires flat from many accidental holes which were not there before. Arthur contacted our command again, asking for further orders, his tone of voice changing from calm to more bored. I knew it would take time - almost like the people on the other side of the radio did not realize our lives were in danger. I wanted to stop thinking about the events that just occured, even if just for a moment, and decided to check on Jean, alone as always, and slowly dragged my foot towards him, speaking as I got close.

- Hope they didn’t blow your beret off, Jean. Would hate to see it happen. - I started, focusing on the first thing I could think of.

- I’m good. - he replied almost instantly in his soft, stoic tone, not adding much. I couldn’t leave it at this.

- That I know, I-

He stopped me with a move of his hand, telling me to remain quiet. I silenced myself on the spot, feeling uneasy again, hearing the wind speak of danger. He lifted his arm, soon adding:

- I’m good. Leave me to my duties before they catch us again. We got lucky nobody was hurt, this time. Don’t try for another gamble.

I couldn’t help but feel he was right, even if I wanted to strike up a conversation. I turned back, keeping my eyes on him for a while, even if he did not bother looking at me before. I made my way back to others, having nothing else to accomplish in the due time. I overheard two of us talking relatively quietly, and decided to listen in uninvited. It was about Beatrice, of course. She quickly became the center of attention, everyone but Jean unsubtly eyeing her or discussing her first kill. George could not stop bringing up her uselessness, keen on claiming it was the first time “the carrot” did anything useful, while blonde hair mostly stayed quiet, rarely nodding or verbally agreeing with his spiteful words. The object of their affection stood nearby, still shaking restlessly with her head stuck in the ground, hearing every accusation thrown her way, but not responding, taking it all in. I felt like I should have done something, get myself involved in their one sided dialogue… Yet I decided not to. I did not know their story. Perhaps she had done something to anger or disappoint her teammates. Maybe she let them down. Maybe she did nothing and they simply had to pick on someone less than their size. I did not really care. I was here to make sure they survived, nothing more.

Finally, Arthur returned with rather dark news. Not unlike us, command could not contact Twos, and our new objective was to track down what remained of them, if there was anything left other than a weak, incomprehensible signal. Sounded like a simple job - but as I learned, even the simplest tasks here required substantial strength, something not everyone had possessed. With no other way of moving, we packed what we could and moved forward - Kate bringing the large radio on her back, making her look like a hilarious, grumpy and slightly oversized leprechaun carrying a pot of gold, unwilling to share it with anyone else. I slung my rifle back on my shoulder, wishing to give my fingers a well deserved rest, before realizing something was missing. I looked back to see her standing at the same spot, gazing into the horizon again. Did she turn herself off again? In the last four days, it happened at least two times, but now it was more risky than ever before. I called after her, but she did not hear me. I had to walk back and make her delicate machinery work again, a goal I accomplished with relative ease, as she gasped loudly and returned her full attention to me immediately after I appeared in her view.

- Eliza? - she only spoke my name, unable to get more words through her throat, her eyes full of tears affixed to mine.

- You just shut down again. We almost left you behind. - Using our moment of solace, I tried to find the right words to make her feel different than she did now. Anything but that fear of hers that crept on my back like it belonged there. - Look, Beatrice? I know that what just happened was… Ugly, and I am not proud of it myself. But this is not over yet. It can happen again, you must get your act together. Can you?

- Eliza, I did not want this to happen! - she screamed silently, her bright tears racing down her face once more. Her words made me feel guilty of making her relive that not so distant memory. - It wasn’t my choice, none of it was-

- Keep it together! - I interrupted her - This is just getting started, Beatrice, and I don’t want your absent mind to get you killed. You will save lives, not just take them. Just stay close to us.

Her face slowly turned away from me, only to look even gloomier. Her legs finally moved and joined the others, just as I did. She needed a short rest to calm her disturbed nerves, but we could not afford it now, having to swiftly carve the way forward. She had to move with us, we needed her badly - she was the only one who knew how to treat bigger wounds, able to prevent a tragedy. Besides, she had to learn to remain calm. A single impulse, careless action could be the end of everyone. I hated acting like I was emotionless, but I had a damn good reason to do so.

* * *

We walked for a long time, passing numerous trees which stood tall among the various bushes and saplings, still waiting to grow large. With each evergreen we passed, I could feel my heart beating faster, afraid of shadows which lingered like threats. I wanted to strike up a conversation with anyone to discharge my emotions, but I could not find the right moment, afraid of what my words could cause as well. We spent long minutes in silence, keeping our eyes on the black road, yet staying far enough from it to be able to take shelter in nature. Eventually, we saw a clearing - another calm and beautiful place, filled with flower fields and lone ankle-height stones scattered around the place, the serenity only disturbed by the same asphalt road that we followed, running straight through it. It was not all, however. I noticed another wrecked vehicle, turned over by an explosion, missing pieces of its hull, and right by it, a few armed men keeping guard, all wearing the same grey, buttoned up uniforms. There was no mistaking it - they were not our allies. I crouched behind one of the pines, keeping myself just out of their sight, just like everyone else. We were yet to be discovered. With my finger off the trigger, I raised the gun up and laid my head on the stock, carefully surveying the place using my rifle scope. Arthur made a remark on using binoculars instead, but I found my oversized magnifying glass to accomplish the job just as well.

- At least five. - I whispered, trying to let others know what we were to deal with.

- We’ve got the advantage, sitting cloaked like this. - said George slightly louder, resting his weapon’s end on the ground. - We just need to spray them open.

- Pot shots will only reveal us. - replied Jean, speaking by his own accord for the first time today. - We will end up like the unfortunate fellows we left behind if we-

- Can you end this debate before they hear you clowns? - Arthur stopped them, not taking his eyes off his binoculars, adding something under his nose. We fell silent again, resorting to waiting again. I felt a chill go down my spine each time one of the soldiers looked our way, my finger almost slipping on the trigger whenever it happened. Campbell relaxed his shoulders and moved his lips again, prying his eyeballs off the telescopes.

- They got nowhere to hide but that damn wreck. George, make sure nobody moves around it, start with the man closest to it. Kate, Jean, just pick your targets or whatever, uh... Carrot? - he turned around to look at her, his face turning into an awkward smile as I thought he would explode with laughter, probably seeing the same puppy eyes she gave me earlier - stay put, don’t want you to shoot us by accident. Eliza, second guy to the left of the truck, with the hat. Probably the leader. See him?

- In my sights, sarge.

- Excellent, madam sniper. Take a shot as I tell you. The rest of you, once you hear the first loud bang, blast them with no strings attached. Got it?

- Why me, out of everyone? - I asked, finally resting my index finger on the trigger, aiming straight at my target’s chest. It felt wrong for me to start a fight. Not that I have not done it before - this time, the stakes were much higher than a few bruises, however.

- You’re the one with a scope and a long barrel, so I assume you can shoot straighter than George. Or do you need a drink first? - he put his binoculars back on his chest, picking his rifle from the ground and holding it close.

- You getting cold feet, Jenny? - Kate said quietly with a smile, turning her eye towards me, having her weapon raised and aimed by now. I haven’t seen her this proud since she gave me that nickname. I still did not understand where it came from.

- I had my drink before we left. Ready. - I replied truthfully, holding my breath again. They put my faith in me, I could not afford to miss this one crucial opportunity.

Just a moment later, I heard him give the signal. I cranked the trigger all the way back. Their officer slowly fell down, dead on the spot, the remaining four people frozen, only coming to realize what happened after he collapsed. I breathed quicker than usual, still not used to the sight of this much blood. The rest of my team soon followed in my steps, managing to score one more before the enemy team quickly scattered, taking cover behind the truck or hitting the ground with force, hoping for it to be their salvation. George kept firing blindly onto one of the sides, keeping the hidden people behind it, while Jean and Kate moved closer, keeping to the treeline. I stayed put, still checking for those who could be a threat to us. They did not dare to peek, locked down by George’s rather inaccurate fire - he did not need to hit, however. What counted is that they were more scared than we were. My ears were bleeding from the incredibly loud machine gun being fired right next to my head almost non-stop, but there was nothing I could do about it. Better safe than sorry, I thought, as I suddenly heard an energetic shout over my left shoulder, followed by a curse and the word “Rocks”. I moved my sight to the left and saw a head sticking out from behind a stone, the rest of the body staying prone, hidden in the various colorful flowers. I pulled my head down and prepared to fire, silently contemplating the fate of the plants crushed under his heavy body. Before I took aim, I heard several shots coming from Campbell, who seemed to have emptied his magazine into the field, noticeable by the distinct sound his gun made after a few pulls of the trigger. I could feel my ears bleeding from the gun cacophony I came to witness. I looked through the scope, trying to confirm the state of this unfortunate soul.

- I think I got him! - screamed Arthur, moving his body lower to the ground, picking up more rounds to put into his rifle. I saw the soldier still moving, however. I was not sure if he was hit or not - but I did not want to risk it. I put another round in him, a small, red mist forming right near the fresh wound.

- Now you did for certain. - I responded, moving the bolt backwards with my twitching hand. - What was that command, even? Rock?

- Hey, you understood it the first time, didn’t ya? - He cranked the clip into his rifle after a short struggle, swearing more than I thought was possible. - Fuck, I need a smoke break after this. Almost lost my cool.

A few more shots came from the clearing’s side, my two squadmates reaching their position, getting rid of our no longer hidden enemies. Silence again. It felt safe to come out, but I preferred to stay behind the tree for a moment longer. A minute passed before Beatrice sneaked up to us, laying her sight on the previously serene field, now intruded by our presence. She stayed silent, not unlike everyone else. George was the first to pack up and move forward, taking a risk which could cost him his life. He carefully made his way to the smoking wreck and inspected it silently before giving us the signal to come forward. Campbell moved his head, telling us to follow him. Without a word, we got up and approached the place, Kate and Jean joining soon. I glanced at the overturned vehicle, noticing something I could not get out of my head for a long time - six bodies of our comrades, lying down almost piled up on top of each other, their cold hands reaching out in all directions. I backed away, trying to forget what I just saw. Arthur, unaware of what lied inside, ordered us to look around for Galvanian survivors, before coming closer to me and witnessing the disgusting view. He fell silent, only resorting to giving me an uncomfortable look, before pulling out a pack of cigarettes and lighting one of them up, putting it in his mouth with his shaking hands. I walked away to search the field, now suddenly a lot creepier than I found it moments ago, covered in bodies, painted red. I heard Arthur call for Kate, asking her for the radio, as he wished to contact our command again.

A long time has passed, but we did not find anything other than bodies. All there was left to do was to go back to our initial meeting point and wait until someone picked us up, seeing as we had no car to take us back to the headquarters. The patrol was over in just a few hours, and most of us already experienced what the war had to offer. None of us was hit by a stray bullet, we survived without as much as a scratch - but it was not about it. We all witnessed death today. We all killed. Some of us took it better than the others, but no one was left untouched, we felt guilty, and we had to act like we were fine with it, like death was a common occurrence. It was our first day on the job, and I dreaded every single one yet to come.

But at least I kept my promise, for now. A single ray of sunshine during the thunder.