DORMITORY
"Good morning, User 352849. How was your sleep?"
"It was satisfactory, thank you."
"Would you like to see the contents of today?"
"Yes, I would like to see that very much, please."
The food tray slid out. The feeding tube extended to 1 metre above the food tray, and sustenance fell onto the tray. Two utensils used for facilitating consumption and reducing spillage fell 2 seconds after.
"Thank you for breakfast. What are the statistics of today?"
"Congratulations! The estimated quantity of waste exceeds by 300% the previous highest score. Do you want to celebrate?"
"Yes, please."
The food tube retracted back into default position. The empty food tray retracted into the wall. Liquid Container Panel opened up. Inside was a beaker with an orange liquid. The content was titled moonshine.
"Define moonshine."
"Moonshine: originally an illegal liquor prior to 2010, when Tennessee, a state in the United States of America, legalized it. It is now a cheaply produced spirit."
"Thank you."
The liquor tasted strange.
"Would you like to scan for organisms before we proceed recycling?"
"Yes, please."
Panel A opened. Exterior Atmosphere Survival Exo-Skeleton extended out. All systems optimal. No leaks.
You could be reading stolen content. Head to the original site for the genuine story.
"Are you ready?"
"Yes."
The airlock opened.
"Scanning... Scanning... Sca-1 humanoid organism detected.1.4 kilometers."
EASES/LFD started its proximity sensor subroutine.
A large parachute was lying on the debris. Most of this waste was far too intact. A gun was cocked.
"Freeze, asshole."
"Who are you?"
"I've got a fucking gun to your head. Shut the fuck up before I blow your brains out."
"That is physically impossible."
"Are you fucking retarded?"
"Physically or mentally retarded?"
"Ok, you know what? Just tell me where I can get somewhere to sleep."
"My home is near our location. Would you like me to escort you there?."
"You *cough* better."
"Are you alright? Do you need medical assistance?"
"Ye-*cough* please.*cough* "
"Humanoid life form found. Requesting medical assistance."
The Quadrupedal Medical Transport exited the garage.
QMT lowered its frame height.
It carried the humanoid back to Home Base.
The airlock closed and filtered the air.
"Can you give me a full medical diagnosis?"
"He has multiple contusions that are recent. Simulations conclude he was beaten with various pieces of metal tubing and similar tools. His respiratory system is contaminated with carbon dioxide, estimated to have originated from the exterior atmosphere. It is the reason he lost consciousness."
"Thank you. Could you treat him?"
"I do not recommend leaving him able to walk freely. He attempted to use a firearm to ascertain your cooperation."
"Could you please restrain him then?"
"Yes."
It was time for lunch.
The food tray slid out. The feeding tube extended to 1 metre above the food tray, and sustenance fell onto the tray. Two utensils used for facilitating consumption and reducing spillage fell 2 seconds after.
"Thank you."
"It is time to clean yourself."
The water was cold.
"Thank you."
"Now it is time for you to learn."
A flight panel rotated 110º out.
"This is a Boeing 777 control panel. Your mission is to safely transport these passenger from Humberside Airport to Philadelphia International airport."
A pilot seat extended from the floor.
"Unfortunately, you forgot various functions and your aircraft crashed into the Atlantic Ocean."
"I'm sorry."
"You still did better than yesterday. Keep practicing and you'll eventually land in point B."
"Thank you."
"It is time for dinner."
The food tray slid out. The feeding tube extended to 1 metre above the food tray, and sustenance fell onto the tray. Two utensils used for facilitating consumption and reducing spillage fell 2 seconds after.
"Complete your physical exercises and then go to sleep."
"Goodnight, User 352849."
"Goodnight, Mother."