CH 4 - Victims of Their Success
“Jokes on you, I’m into that,” The Chief Executive Producer recited from the data crystal before him, “What does that even mean Furalt?”
“Hmmm, there’s no approximation that comes close to translating it for you, CEP,” Furalt provided, “However, Milky Wayers and many of the other fans thought it was hilarious. Our research does cite its usage in the old texts. What we can surmise is that it was a catchphrase for a short period.”
“And what is Joke build,” asked the Chief Executive Producer. He turned his high-back chair around from the bank of suspended crystals that were set behind his desk. Each monitored different events, streams, and real-time metrics on broadcast statistics. He was what Milky Wayers called Reptilian in appearance but he was more akin to a mineral than the scaly beasts.
“The Milky Way Consultants we hired had recruited her for the sole purpose that her abilities did not complement the newly synchronizing universe. It is meant to be ironic.” Furalt bodily wheezed out a laugh.
The Chief Executive Producer started chuckling, “I get it now. It will be more of a struggle for her, good content.”
“But will it be enough,” Oribob called to the odd couple as he made his way into the Chief’s office, “the Milky Way had been such a unique opportunity for us. We were able to latch on to their media signals and stream them decades in advance of the synchronization. By the time our last season of One Universe was on the air, there were whole planets that were hooked on Grey’s Anatomy and listening to Taylor Swift.”
“Yes, I know the import of our charge,” the CEP nodded, his entire iguana-shaped body moving in the process, “Our network has grown to number one in the Collected Universes. If we can’t deliver, all those sponsorships will go down the drain.”
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“Not to mention what the Katrellian Board would do at the slightest sniff of softness,” Oribob said pointedly.
Furalt croaked, “But what are our options?”
“Skylark48,” replied Oribob. He had finally finished rolling across the room to join his compatriots around the desk, “Certainly we shouldn’t put all our Terkel Stones in one small container, but let’s try to get her somewhere interesting. She had some strong numbers at first but people can only watch someone power leveling for so long. The same goes for the rest of the participants, but let’s queue Skylark48 up first and see if we can get her somewhere pre-tutorial.”
“Agreed,” said the Chief Executive Producer, “I can get a warp option fired up and begin transmission now. We haven’t been able to get anything from the 48th Universe before getting our probes and feet on the ground. Not like the Milky Way…”
“Why is that,” Oribob cut off the CEP.
“It’s because,” Furalt explained, “the main planet of the 48th universe with sapient beings has several gassy atmospheres with an obsidian crust and a mantle rich in heavy metals and rock. All of the abilities of my team combined are still barely enough to focus on the planet. Also, as you have seen on the streams, this is a low-tech, low-magic planet with no media signals to listen in on. We told viewers this season of One Universe was a huge secret. In all honesty, we barely know anything about the place.”
“And that’s why we have to do this just right,” the Chief Executive Producer mumbled. He had already turned his chair around and was channeling ephemeral origins into the crystals gathered before him. Blue shimmering waves of energy hummed from the CEP and then radiated out from the centermost levitating crystal, each blue line that connected the crystals started to thrum, and the blue puissance spider-webbed further. The CEP did his best to corral and cajole the system. It was a subtle thing. You couldn’t do anything too out of the question but the system seemed to like some of their suggestions. Especially after last season and the network had stockpiled resources for this exact moment. “Perfect,” smiled the CEP.