Chapter 6 – Ale, Lies, and Secrets

“Hey little guy, mind if we sit here?” Anna smiles as she slides into the seat opposite me, not even bothering to wait for my reply.

“Uhm, sure. Go ahead, miss.” I nod, slightly flustered by being put on the spot so suddenly.

“Pardon the intrusion.” Brian says solemnly as he sits down next to Anna. “I apologise on behalf of my friend here. She isn’t really that good with social cues.”

“Shut up, Brian, I’m doing just fine. Look, he doesn’t look angry. Are you?” She directs the last question at me.

“Uhm, no…”

“You see, Brian? It’s all good. You should relax a little. If you twist the stick too much, you are going to get hemorrhoids.” She smirks at Brian. “Oh, pardon my french, little guy.” She smiles. “You’ll get used to it. I’m Anna, and this party-pooper over here is Brian.” She extends her hand in greeting.

“Uh. Nice to meet you. I’m Ryan.” I shake their hands in turn. 

“So, what’s your story, Ryan? Brian asks, no doubt cutting in before Anna says anything else that could be interpreted weirdly. Right, shit. You’ve practiced for this Ryan; just use one of dad’s famous one-liners.

Giving Anna a questioning gaze, I turn to face Brian. “Ah, nothing much really. I just logged into the game for the first time a few hours ago and had a look around. I stepped in here to buy a drink, but the barkeep didn’t accept my Visa.” I shrug.

“Your… Visa?” Anna blinks twice before she starts roaring in laughter. “You actually tried to pay with a credit card!? That… That’s hilarious!” She guffaws. “Please tell me you’re joking.” She wipes a tear from her eye. Dad-joke: Success!

Trying to hide a grin of his own, Brian tries to collect himself. “Excuse me, sir. Is this perhaps the first time you’ve tried to play an online game?” He asks, struggling to keep his voice even. Anna, on the other hand, is flying off her hinges.

That worked better than I thought it would. Can I go for a double here? Why not. What’s the worst that could happen? I stare directly into Brian’s eyes, steadying my breathing as I slowly raise an eyebrow. 

“Whatever do you mean? A Visa should be a perfectly valid transaction method even across international… Pfft. Nah, I’m just doing this for shits and giggles.” I grin as I watch Brian’s face go from utter confusion to a wide grin of his own. 

“Oh snap, Brian! He got us good!” Anna chuckles, gently punching Brian in the arm. “I love this guy!”

Still grinning, Brian buries his face in his hands. “Ah damnit, Ryan. You’ve done it now. It will take hours for Anna to come down from this. Do you really want me to suffer this badly?”

“Lighten up Brian, you could learn a thing or two from our short friend here!” She laughs as her eyes meet mine. “Now I definitely need to know your story.” Her eyes squint at me. “... Trap Maker? You’re a crafter? Nice! I don’t see many of your types these days. The few people that even bother playing as a Craftsman always choose to play as one of the standardized production classes like a Blacksmith or an Enchanter. Not many bother spending their time on making Traps. What’s up with that?”

Wow, is her Perception score really this low? Not surprising for a mage-type character, but still.

“Eeh, well, I recently went through some stuff in real life, and I thought I’d try out one of these games you kids are all talking about these days. Since I have to do something while I’m sleeping in this coffin-, I mean capsule, I might as well try doing something with my hands. I have always had an interest in making traps…”

“Huh? How old are you?” Anna cuts in.

“Anna, you can’t just-”

“Nah, it’s quite fine, young man. She reminds me of my little sister. I’m currently fifty-three years… I mean, real-life level fifty-three.” I smile at the pair. 

Anna chuckles. “Level fifty-three, I love it! I would never have guessed! Your character looks like he is in his mid-twenties.”

Wow; impersonating dad really pays off. I give her a meaningful glance. “I may have tweaked the settings just a little bit. Can you blame an old man for trying to regain his youthful looks?”

“No, sir, no I can’t!” She grins, a tear of joy running down her chin.

I sit still for a moment and smile while Brian admonishes Anna for her lack of manners. For the record, I’m obviously lying about my age. I really am in my mid-twenties, but I figured masquerading as an older man would make it easier for me to sell the story of just playing the game to pass time. It feels kind of weird lying to these perfectly nice people, but it’s not like it really matters when we’re online though. I will eventually just turn into a distant memory as soon as they leave the tavern and head out to do adventure somewhere. That’s the beauty of the anonymous internet. I’m a little surprised I’m this good at lying though.

“It’s definitely a breath of fresh air to see someone from the older generation take an interest in VRMMOs.” Brian smiles as he takes a sip from his mug.

“Yeah, you’re good people!” Anna giggles. “We should try to get him into our guild! The Dark Pegasus is always looking for good crafters. What do you say, old man? Interested?”

I nearly choke on my ale as the question catches me off guard. I cough violently for a few moments until I manage to clear my airways enough to shake my head.

“Sorry about that. It went down the wrong pipe. I appreciate the offer, young lady, but I only play this game to relax and see things that I haven’t seen before. I probably won’t stay online much, and I don’t think I will ever keep up with you young people.” I say, trying to turn her down in the nicest possible way. 

“Ah, come on, old man! It would be fun! I’ll vouch for you! You don’t have to do much.” She says, leaning in closer while touching my arm.

“Lay off it, Anna. The guild doesn’t take in anyone below level twenty. Level ten if they’re a Craftsman. Ryan seems like a nice guy, but if what he says is true, then I don’t think he can level up fast enough until the requirements rise. Even if the guild leader is your sister, I don’t think we can justify picking up just about anyone.” Brian says evenly. “Uhm, no offense, Ryan.”

If you stumble upon this narrative on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen from Royal Road. Please report it.

“None taken.” I smile, internally celebrating as this could have turned real weird, real fast.

“Tssk.” She pouts. “We could team up and I could boost you to level ten if you want?” She asks me hopefully.

“Anna, that would take days. You would fall too far behind the rest of our party.” Brian shakes his head.

“Don’t worry about me. I can catch up!”

“Please, you two. Don’t fight over me. I’m happy the way I am.” I try to calm the situation. What the hell is wrong with these people? Who goes to such lengths for a level one player they met for the first time just ten minutes ago?

Still pouting, Anna glares at me. “Fine… But I’ll still add you to my friends list.”

[High Elf Aeromancer - Anna’el Windrider wants to add you to her friends list.]

“Uhm. Thanks.” I smile, accepting her invitation. Luckily, the Villain class doesn’t block friend requests for some reason. I probably shouldn’t accept it, but I think that would just bring more trouble than it’s worth. I could always just delete her later, but that could be bad if I ever run into her again. I can always change my privacy settings to appear offline during the daytime.

“So what’s your plan going forward, Ryan?” Brian asks. 

“Hmm? Oh, I was planning on doing a few quests and make enough money to try my hands at making some of these traps. I’m really looking forward to trying some of these designs.” I say, glad to finally have a change of topic. 

“Ooh! I can help with that! Here, take some of this. I have plenty.” Anna perks up as she places a few coins on the table. My eyes widen as I realise she just put twenty gold coins and a small stack of silver and copper coins on the table. A small fortune for a player just starting out at level one. One gold coin is worth a euro, while ten silvers are worth a gold coin and ten copper coins are worth a silver.

“I can’t possibly accept…” I start, too shocked at her gesture.

“It’s fine, my sister has plenty. You’re a good man, Ryan. I’m only happy to help.” She beams at me.

Normally, I’d be happy to rob other players of their hard-earned money. When someone hands it over to me willingly, however, on top of me lying my ass off to them just makes me feel outright bad about it. 

“I need to repay you somehow…” I mutter, my eyes still fixated on the small pile of gold.

“Then keep playing the game and make a great trap for me.” She grins, taking a large swig from her mug of ale.

I just smile at her antics. I feel even worse for lying to her now, but I really appreciate how pure she is. I don’t think I would ever just hand away money like that to anyone for such a trivial reason, but it certainly warms my heart when I get to meet people with such pure intentions.

“I will. Someday.” I say while downing the rest of my ale. “So what are you two up to?”

Brian sighs. “We are heading out to meet the rest of our party. We should have been playing with them this morning, but someone…” He glares at Anna. “Decided to rather try and fish some secret quest out of a barkeep in the middle of the noob district.” 

“Tssk, I had to try, didn’t I? It’s not like it’s putting us too far behind.” She shrugs. 

“You are aware that this stupid trip cost us a large chunk of Renown, right?” His jaw clenches. 

“What, you mean that Necromancer business? Don’t sweat it. There will be more Necromancers for us to kill.” She shrugs while yawning exaggeratedly. I’m pretty certain I can see that Brian is about to pop a virtual blood vessel.

Wait a second. What’s that about Necromancer business!?

“That was a freaking level thirty-eight Necromancer! Are you aware of how rare they are!? There’s only like twenty of them who passed level thirty-five, and this game has millions of players! Where the hell would we even find one that’s worth enough Renown to bother hunting down?” His voice strains as he is trying to keep his cool. Anna returns his glare with a scowl.

Deciding to intervene before things get out of hand, or god forbid, we draw any more attention, I clear my throat.

“I’m sorry, but is this Necromancer thing important enough to argue over?” I say calmly. Little do they know I’m trying to stay calm the situation for my own sake, and not theirs.

Breaking eye contact with Anna, Brian is the first to meet my gaze. I notice a glint of anger in his eyes until he finally realises how silly they must look. Closing his eyes and taking a deep breath, he finally seems to calm himself down.

“You’re right, Ryan. I’m sorry about that.” His cheeks turn crimson before he quickly turns his head away.

“Anyway, It was nice meeting you kids. I think I’m going to check out the neighbourhood before morning and maybe try my hand at some quests.” I smile as I get up on my feet and do a few light stretches. “Idle hands make an idle mind.” I’m not going to admit that the real reason I want to get out of here is that I don’t want them to notice me venting my frustrations in a very unfitting manner for an older gentleman. The Necromancer subject is still a bit too sore.

“Yeah, I think you’re right.” Brian says, following my example of getting up. 

“Or we could grab another mug of ale?” Anna grins.

“Haha, maybe another time.” I smile at her. 

Anna starts pouting, but her frown quickly turns into a mischievous grin as she leans towards me. “Hey, we’re not really supposed to tell anyone outside of the guild, but what the hell. I like you, Ryan.” She whispers, her grin growing wider. 

I raise my eyebrow in confusion. “What do you mean?”

“Anna, what are you-” Brian starts but is quickly waved off by Anna.

“Oh, shut up Brian. It’s not that big of a deal.” She gives him an angry glare. Brian looks like he wants to protest, but his shoulders soon slump together in defeat against Anna’s steely gaze. With a snort, Anna turns back towards me. “Right. This has to stay between us, so please don’t tell anyone. Promise?”

My eyebrows rise in surprise at this sudden development. I have no idea what’s going on, but color me intrigued. I give her a quick nod before I lean towards her.

She smiles. “Right. Behind the tavern here and a few other places scattered around town is an old entrance to the sewers. There’s a bunch of level one to three rats down there that don’t put up much of a fight. I think it’s the only place in the entire noob district where you can do some actual combat. If you collect their tails, you can turn them in at the church for some easy coin and experience. It’s the best way to level up quickly.” She winks. “This needs to stay between us though.” 

My eyes brighten at her words. There’s a secret area that no one knows about!? Could this be the way to escape the district? Holy shit! When did I become this lucky?

“That sounds very interesting. Thank you, Anna. I promise not to break your trust in me.” I nod sincerely. Well, sincere as in that I won’t tell anyone since the entire trust aspect of our relationship went straight out of the window the first time I opened my mouth.

She smiles. “Thank you again, Ryan. I had a blast meeting you.”

“Yeah, me too.” Brian mumbles, still red in embarrassment after Anna chastised him.

[Human Templar - Bronn Silverguard wants to add you to his friends list.]

Quickly accepting his request, the three of us head for the door.

“See you tomorrow, Joe!” Anna laughs as we exit the tavern. The sour old barkeep grunting menacingly in return. “I think the old coot is warming up to me.”

As we step outside, I wince as the sun threatens to momentarily blind me. Damn. I think we spent a bit too much time in that gloomy tavern. 

“We should do this again.” Anna smiles. “Send me a message whenever, alright?”

“I will, thanks for everything, you guys. Next time, the ale is on me!” I laugh.

“It’s a date!” Anna waves as the pair start walking off. I stand back for a little while, just looking at their departing forms. They eventually turn around a corner and disappear from view. My hand immediately clenches, and I slam it into the tavern wall, eliciting a creaking noise from the old wood.

“So it was their party, huh… Good to know.” I mutter as I turn around and walk back into the tavern.