I walk sluggishly into my apartment. However despite my slow movements I still manage to stub my toe or should I say was unable to prevent a forward strike on the couch launch by the secret organisation that controls my foot.
I fall face thirst on the couch and make no effort to move.
“ Ouch! Where the fuck are my shoes?”
“ No. you do not get to say that… also you left them on the street a few minutes away.”
“ Did I? Why the did I do that?”
“How the fuck should I know what goes though you’re brain other than ahhh fuck I am bored.”
“ Well in my defense their isn’t anything else that goes through my mind than that most of the time and by the way I am bored. And I hunger for the flesh.”
“I think there's some left over mushrooms in the fright that Zoe left here last time she was over.”
“ Zoey… Zoe Zo zo zo. Zoe the high elf.”
“More like hight stoner.”
“ No Zoe been good she quit a lot of that stuff didn’t she? I remember she did right we looked after her when she was going through withdrawals.”
“We locked her in a basement when she was going through withdrawals. And that was the second time we locked her in their this year.”
“ Well Zoe is Zoe and at least she fights the demons in her head.”
“The fuck are you talking about all the demons in here were eaten by me remember. And it’s weird how clear headed you get when were talking about Zoe do you want to bang her that much? Fuck.”
I look to the side. There is a small rodent call Ruffles the cat, who is a cat. He… she? It’s a he there is a cat dick. Well that cat sits there looking up at me with eyes that you know have seen some shit. He raises his paw. And slaps my leg. Then hops on top of me. As he does so I find out I am not part owl and can’t turn my head 360 degrees. So I look forward and see a black and white picture on the wall. Its me holding my arms up as someone says broken before me.
The thrill of excitement on my face. Ahh that was the shit.
They call it the arena.
Two step in one comes out. Well the other comes out later they… most of the time.
“ Fuck they used to let you do anything back then before the regulations came in. From magic to bionic enhancements it was the absolute best thing ever. Ahh then the sponers came and it was now a business about money and not long after that they add regulations. Although it's still pretty great no one dies and heavily ruled. But it used to be the best.”
“Nothing but pussys now. A bunch of sluts sucking their own dicks stop piles of money they pay other sluts to shove up their ass. It's the true reason all the people responsible look bloated beyond compare. Its the green they wrap around the dicks of the water boys that get loged up their ASSets… hahahahaha .”
What a colourful description. And that was a bad pun my girl.
But it's true.
Well weather it is or not doesn't matter. What does matter is that… hey you know Sef I have been thinking.
Oh this should be good.
What are we trying to do?
Huh?
Well I mean like what's the purpose of my life.
No you still don’t have me?
What are we striving to achieve? Are we just waiting around until you think of someone you don’t like then we act to make their life hard or what else is there. What are we striving for?
Revolution?
No… I don’t want to start a civil war but I want something to aim for you know. Immortality can get kinda boring.
Oh so this was all building up to I am bored was it. Ok let's think of something to do… You want to play chess? Or watch a movie? When was the last time we did something?
I think I am going to go see Zoe.
Ok. Lets go.
…
Mason?
Who the fuck am I?
Your Mason Bight.
The fuck does that even mean know. You know what would be nice… if I was hit by a truck and got sent to another world were I could build a harem.
Yeah. I would also like that.
Let's go jump in front of trucks on the highway.
Hahahahaha… you’re serious… No.
Ahhhh then lets bitch to someone about how privileged my life is. I can’t wait to complain about how easy my life is because that won’t make me an asshole.
No how could sharing your burdens with you’re less fortunate friends then you make you an ass hole.
I take my phone out of my pocket. Then I slide my hand into my paints and try and help settle my boredom with marshmallows… fap fap fap.
30 minutes later I put my phone down and pull my hand up. Nothing. It looks like I am just not in the mood today or something. Although it got hard I had no problems in that department seems like that will be all I can get it to do for now.
Damn I feel frustrated. Hey I know you don’t like the idea but we could summon something from the underworld for you to fuck.
You know I hate things like that.
Why? It's a honest trade. You get what she wants and she will be paid for her time it’s a far more honest thing then 50% of relationships. It's not anything different from what you were just doing.
No. Just no.
We going to go see Zoe on the off chance she let you?
No I don’t feel like it anymore.
Then?
I want to kill something.
Mason you just said something I cannot joke over… I have been waiting for this for years! Yes let's go sacrifice someone on an altar dedicated to me. Sef the destroyer of worlds.
Taken from Royal Road, this narrative should be reported if found on Amazon.
Actually… I meant… I want excitement.
Exactly! Let's do get off the couch and lets go!
Ahhh. Remember the old days before… technology. When man ruled with a stick.
The really old days? You usually can’t remember back that far.
Lets… go do something.
What?
I… don’t know…
I closed my eyes and a picture of a man sleeping in a pool of blood running down the side of a mountain. Painting the green grass another colour.
I open my eyes. “ Space war.”
“ Sorry there aren't any of those. Its the area of world peace. No wars in fact most countries are minding their own business.”
“ That's great.”
Oh the cats asleep on your back.
“ That’s great.”
I close my eyes again and join the cat.
It doesn’t take long before I am dreaming of sharks riding donkeys riding elephants riding pigs,riding mice. The elephant is scared of the mice.
Its funny.
Then the dream switches the face of another. She smiles as she cries. The war is won. But I have paid far too much and gained to little.
Then I see her old, children of her own. Then I see another girl. A daughter. It's the woman's… but its not mine. Then she is old. Another child, this time a son. Then he is old. Then another and another and another and another and another. The last was a sad man. He just didn’t want to live. Then I am alone. I can’t watch this anymore.
Then I see myself in a field. Lines of corpses are piled next to me as if to funnel me forward. I look to see that they are all my corpses. A valley of my own death. I walk forward.
The corpses collapse and I am trapped under the weight of my own past. I struggle and struggle and soon I am free and standing on a top of corpses that aren't mine anymore.
So I sit. I know those I sit upon. A sword in one hand and crown in the other. I look up at the sky.
“I win”
“No you didn’t.”
Then I see it. Worlds after worlds. Existence is endless!
Then I pear down the mountain. Covered in snow its pure white. It's so tall I can’t see the bottom of it. Then I brush the snow away with my foot and to find out its a mountain of corpses.
I turn around to find myself dancing in the jungle a tribal woman covered in mini skulls and is dancing with me she looks up “ Come find me… I am but a world away.”
Then a bolt of lightning hits her and she is erased.
I look at the pile of ash that was her and look up to find why self in a river of blood. The a man sits on the river bed the tide is rising. “ Come save me… so that I can save them.” The tide rises and he drowns
Then I am in a world of metal. A machine core is plugged into thousands of sockets in wall that float in the sky the machine speaks “ Come free me… the loneliness is unbearable now.” The machine destroys itself
Then this heaven of absolute beauty is before me I turn to see a woman of perfection. “ Come lets gamble… I am lucky after all.” She goes to sleep and never wakes up again.
Then I see an endless hell of death, despair and mindless violence a human shaped beast of red flesh sits atop a broken throne and a hole in the sky pours light down as thousands of angels invade. “ Come kill me… I don’t want to give them the right.” And angel beheads him in a public square.
Then I see a king strapped into his own mind. He fears his wife. He fears his people. As he should but he fears his most loyal daughter who fears him not. “ Come awaken this old fool from his blindness… so that I may lead other from it to.”
He lungers at his daughter only to be sliced in half she is then burned for the crime of the kings death. She weeps but a single tear while the mother weeps none.
Then a man stands before me. I can’t make out any details about him except that he is angry.
“Don’t worry I will come to you. No matter how far you flee.”
My eyes open. I jump up. Zoe jumps back startled by my jump.
“ Zoe!” I screamed
“ Aaaa… Oh hey Mason.”
“Hahahahaha! Hahahah! Hahahahaha hahahahaha Hahahah hahahahaha hahahahaha “
“ Mason? Mason! Hey you ok.”
I break out laughing as loud as I can. My eyes roll back slightly and my jaw hurts because of how painful it is. I roll and stretch my arms while digging my fingers into the couch as hard as I can. My back twists and turns as I am reminded the simple pleasure of existence. Hahahahaha!
Hahahahaha!
Mason what the fuck!
I know! Sef I have decided! Let's travel the multiverse I search of a way to make you real!
I am real!
“ then let's make you a god!”
I roll around on the couch in positions that would make even the most flexible squeal as I am constantly breaking and disconnecting
“ Mason are you high!”
Materials will be needed as will money. Man power, authority, stats I will need this to get started on my project. Hahahahaha
Mason? Hey you're freaking me out man calm down.
Suddenly I am grabbed. “ Calm.” The voice that spoke was a heavy that rocked you when you heard it. It shook you to the core and seem almost undeniably powerful but not threatening or moving.
I stop my craziness and turn to see a black mountain. Not that it matters that he is black!
“ Oh hey Noah what's up man?”
“ You good now?”
“ Yeah I’m good.”
“ Ok then… I am going to let go of you now.”
“ Sure.”
I stand up and look down at Noah and smile. He flinches at my smile. Why does it always do that?
You flinch at your own reflection whenever you smile.
Really? Well although Noah is built like a brick house it’s a short brick house as even standing on his toes he only comes up to my shoulders. Well in all honesty my shoulders are about the average height of a person to be honest so he not that bad it just when you put him next to me and when you put him next to… the giant named Zoe.
I turn around to face Zoe. I have to look up. God shes tall… and thin. She's also a bit pale. She has this grey beanie she got ages ago from somewhere that she wears all the time. Like me is is a retired great of the arena although the reasons we left are different.
Well if theirs anything else she is a high elf.
She's also very beautiful but you find that most people are not into her for few reasons. The first is her abbs. They scare even me.
The second lack of breasts. She has the figure of a 1 in others words flat. So her words are justice!
And finally is that she is freakishly tall even among the other high elves. Like tall enough that she must bend down to enter my house because she is too tall for our door… honestly she's a centimeter away from being to big for our roof.
Also her hair is black which is extremely rare for high elves.
Their are high elves that think she isn’t a high elf due to her hair colour.
Well that’s because all elves are secretly evil.
Ahhhhhhhhh actually I think it's not the elves fault in all this… so you gonna tell me what all that was about? No I don’t feel like it.
Oh yeah Zoe is wearing a normal white t shirt and black pants… hey same as me… actually is that my shirt and pants?
Probably.
They look so small on her… or is she doing that on purpose to show of her abbs
Probably… fuck they are mesmerising.
Any way I have our new side project.
Oh yeah… what?
Actually I am not sure yet it might take years of preparation but we have a starting point.
Ok then where's the starting point
I need money. And lots of money.
Well most adventures start like that. What you gonna do?
I am not sure yet after all it’s not like money grows on trees this might be difficult… well I collect rent tomorrow.
Oh actually how much money are we talking about?
Couple billion.
Yeah… what the fuck is rent gonna do?
We need to start somewhere. You know like the first step on the journey and if I wait it out then it might take to long and I will forget.
Anyway what is it?
A surprise… or I will tell you after I make sure it's even possible.
Huh? You don’t know if it’s possible… its not space war is it? Your not going to try and start a space war because you should probably give up now. I mean your just a guy… or your immortal but other than that you’re just a guy in fact I don’t think you could even throw a punch anymore.
Well I was thinking.
Oh so you are just going to tell me.
It's not my fault this world is boring… it's the worlds.
All mass murders think its the worlds fault not theirs… go on
So all I need to do is go somewhere that isn’t boring!
What the fuck did I say about space war. Its not happening.
No… not space well think about it you can summon shit right so can you not like… ahhh summon yourself.
Explain?
Well if we can summon then to this world then can’t I be summon to theirs?
No you wou- actually immortality so what's the worst that could happen.
Exactly.
I look around the room I am in. The couch is pushed up against the wall and theirs a TV like thing on the other side. To the right of me is another wall. Next to the TV on the left side a meter down the wall breaks away and there's a small corridor to the front door that faces right of me. Further down the left is the kiction and a door leading to the rest of the apartment.
That is the entrance to my apartment. If there's anything else to add my carpet is covered in plastic and has a few blood stains and there's an operation table in the living room kitchen that I use as a dining table.
You know I expect you to change the plastic ever now and then to remove the evidence and especially not invite people over when it's their
Please who the fuck doesn't know what I do.
Right that's why you haven’t gotten someone on your table in a week
It's a slow week.
Or the survivors are speaking the truth. That it’s probably better to take the bullet then come here. Oh where's the cat?
Fuck the cat… we have no cat.
Yes w-
Not anymore!
You better not kill my cat you fuck!
Don’t worry I won’t kill your cat.
That means you can’t sit to the side and watch it die either you have to take steps to insure its survival.
Hahahahaha oh don’t worry. “ Hey Noah you want a cat?”
“ No my building won’t allow pets… Hey don’t glare at me.”
Noah was wearing some shorts and a hoodie with a lion on it. Oh yeah he's also hairless.
“ So… why is everyone here?” I had to ask
“Oh yeah remember the little girl well she had her first match today in the arena so I wanted to have Zoe comment on it and maybe share some points I didn’t ask you because I know how you get about this stuff but they gave me the footage for her fight.”
… don’t say it. Don’t say it? You hear me don’t say it. Just nod and pretend you know what your talking about.
“ Who? I don’t know who your talking about?”
Noah looks like he’s about to cry and even Zoe looks a little off and scratching her arm and walding into the corner. Noah has this look of acceptance and absolutely sorrow at the same time.
“ Ahh yeah… its Vex”
Vex… that name means something to me?
Yeah it should.
“ Nope you still lost me.”
“ Really she likes you a lot.”
“ Oh really?”
“ Yeah she talks about you all the time and won’t shut up about how epic you were when you fought in the past.”
“ Yeah she is like you’re biggest fan she could even fight Noah for the title you know… think hard about it. Really hard. She had long hair and looks like a mix from then girl from the ring and some common office worker. That what she was until you discovered her ability to fight and...” Zoe came out and said. She looked really uncomfortable.
Hmmm, that name. VEX!
No nothing
You fucking… no ok. Yep she's just a fan its not like she could be anything else you idiot… no this is why I am here. To remember in your place I am the brains you are the muscle.
“ Well then let's play the footage. I am sure you downloaded it so send it to the TV let's do this on the big screen rather than huddle around a phone.”
“ No… let up first eat. I promised Zoe a meal do you mind if I use your kitchen.”
He says as he walks to my kitchen.