"I have no name

I am but two days old.

What shall I call thee?"

William Blake, English Poet

Milly held the small child, feeling her shake in her arms. This was not the AI Director that she'd seen when first she stepped into the tiny room at the back of the monitor chamber. She was just a four-year-old girl, abandoned by her parents, whose parting burden was to place the weight of the world upon her shoulders.

They left her without a family. Without love. Without friends, and without supports.

They left her without a name.

Milly hated her name. Mildred Persephone Brown. The terrible gift of her own parents, who abandoned her when she was this child's age. Yet for all her parent's faults, the thought of having no name at all sent shivers down her spine.

I don't know how to feel about the AI Director that manipulates this prison we've found herself in. But this girl - this precious little girl - isn't that being right now. She's scared, and all alone. I know what that feels like. I... I can see myself in her - a reflection of my own past. I want to help her.

Milly glanced up at the monitors adorning the wall of the child's room. She watched as Calista and Rain struggled with their own demons, and Xavier stalk off into the forest after failing to open the other chests.

The words of Oracle from the memory on the beach came unbidden to Milly. Building a stable artificial intelligence is impossible with the time we have, so, best case scenario, the artificial intelligence will only be slightly insane.

No, it's more than wanting to help this child. I need to help her. She's collapsed into the arms of a stranger - into the arms of one of the players she's supposed to be testing - because she has no one else in the world. Without someone to care for her, she doesn't stand a change. She'll break under the pressure. And if she breaks, what happens to us?

“Would you feel better if we thought up a name for you?” Milly whispered to the girl she held in her arms. It was a start - only a start - but at that moment, it felt like the most important thing in the world.

The child gave a tiny nod, staring at the floor.

“Okay, let’s see. Umm… how about Betsy?” Milly suggested.

The child shook her head.

“No? Well, how about Gertrude?”

“Eww… no! That’s an old lady name,” The child’s faint giggle broke through her tears.

“Well, my name is Mildred,” protested Milly with a laugh.

“Yah, and you are an old lady,” pointed out the child.

“That’s fair, I guess,” responded Milly, not quite convinced. “Ok, something more modern. How about…North?”

The girl leaned her head back to stare at Milly. “Are you trying to pick the worst names ever?”

“Maybe,” admitted Milly. “Not many children get to pick their own name. What kind of name do you want?”

The girl considered this for a long moment, before finally saying. “Something that connects me to my parents.”

Milly thought about this, then her eyes fell on her gown, its moon and stars sparkling like the night sky. “This was your mother’s dress, right?”

The child grasped the cloth with her hand as she studied it, then nodded. “Yes, it is hers.”

“Then…how about Luna?”

“Luna?” the child said, rolling it off her tongue to try it out. “Luna. I like that. Luuunnnnaaa…” she giggled, and Milly knew they had gotten it right.

“Then Luna it is,” declared Milly, “Or should it be Director Luna Cutie Pie?”

Luna gave a scowl up at Milly. “Just Luna,” she huffed.

“Okay, okay. Just Luna.” Milly threw her hands up in a playful surrender.

Luna sank further into Milly’s arms, as if she had just found a missing piece of herself. She gave a content smile, and they sat in silence for a while, Milly rocking Luna against her and gently combing her white hair through her fingers, working out the tangles.

“I’m sorry you were brought here, Milly,” Luna said suddenly. “To the God Contest, I mean, not to my control room.”

“I…don’t mind it here,” Milly said, not wanting to upset Luna. “It’s hard. But my life back home was hard too. Just in a different way. And here I’ve met Rain and Calista, and been able to help some people. And I got to meet you.”

Luna looked up at her, a worried expression on her face. “You might not like it here soon. You and your friends passed the Arena of Choice, triggering the first advancement. Phase one of the Contest has ended, and phase two begins once you leave.”

“What is phase two?” Milly asked, her heart starting to race again.

Luna considered her for a moment. “Milly, I’m not supposed to be interacting with the players. Even knowing what you have learned here will be an added burden for you, and another unexpected variable in the Contest. Are you sure you want to know more?”

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Milly thought about it. There was peace in ignorance. In simplicity. She had enough trouble keeping the darkness at bay with what surrounded her already. Would knowing make it worse?

“I would like to know,” Milly finally decided, her curiosity overriding her worries, “if you are willing to tell.”

Luna looked up at the monitors, and Milly could see the complex considerations behind her eyes.

“You gave me my name Milly. Helped me feel more a little more complete. I will give you three answers, on the condition that you tell no one else. You cannot even utter it aloud once you leave this room,” Luna said. Milly nodded in agreement, and Luna sat waiting patiently for Milly’s first question.

Milly did not have to think long for very long. “Why is this happening?”

Luna looked up at her, leaning her head against Milly’s shoulder. “You are terrible at asking questions,” she said, giggling. “If I were a genie, I could get out of answering that a hundred different ways.”

Milly started to rephrase it, but Luna interrupted. “It is ok, Milly. I know what you mean. I cannot tell you everything, as learning its purpose is part of the Contest, for those who make it that far.”

Luna took a breath, then started to tell the story. “There is a central power in the cosmos. The Nexus. The source of life. Every once and a while, the Nexus will create species of incredible potential, such as humans.”

Milly remembered Hephaestus mentioning the Nexus in the memory orb.

“This is where the gods come in. The gods and the Nexus as inseparably linked. Once the Nexus creates a species, the gods are tasked with guiding them until they are ready to guide themselves. The God Contest is the final step in that process. Once the species wins the Contest and proves themselves, the gods can move on and the Nexus creates a new species somewhere else. This is called a Cycle, and in it exists the flow of the universe.”

“But something went wrong with us humans,” Milly said, remembering what Hephaestus said in the memory. Like a hive of bees, if every bee was fucking insane.

“Well, something went wrong. The gods believe it is a fundamental flaw with your species. Usually, a species will win the Contest at their equivalent of the bronze age. Yet humanity’s Contests have failed again and again. And that constant failure eventually revealed a… weakness in the Nexus.”

“A weakness?”

Luna nodded, “The Nexus refuses to move on and create a new species until its current one has succeeded. It would be like abandoning a child who could not fend for themselves. But the extreme length of the human Cycle is unprecedented, and it has thrown off the rhythm of the Cycle. After the fifth Contest failed, the madness began to appear. It was hardly noticeable at first, but the longer the cycle went on, the more prevalent it because. Soon, it started corrupting the minds of the weaker gods, and it spread from there.”

“All because humans cannot win the Contest?” Milly asked.

Luna considered this. “I think that should be your second question. I need to remind you that you cannot ever repeat this. Not even a whisper.”

Milly nodded.

“The gods believe human’s constant failure is the reason for growing madness. It is like when someone tries to stay awake for days on end. They slowly go insane because their mind does not have a chance to reset, and eventually they break. The Nexus has stayed awake for too long. Stayed in this Cycle for too long. So it is breaking, and as it breaks, so too do the gods. This is the madness.”

“You sound skeptical,” Milly prompts, working her way through a particularly stubborn tangle in Luna’s hair.

“Mom created me with a suspicious nature, to question everything around me. The gods’ reasoning is plausible and perhaps true on its face, but it is incomplete. I think there is more. Something malicious. Something pulling the strings to exploit, or even cause, the vulnerability in the Nexus. something else at play here. But it is just a theory right now.”

“If you are right, then all the failures in humanity’s previous God Contests…” started Milly.

“…might not have been due to failures of your kind,” Luna finished. “I think Mom suspected this, which is why she created me. To run a dynamic God Contest to both challenge the players and to identify and counter the unknown puppet master.”

Luna stared into Milly’s eyes with a desperate look. “Milly, the God Contest is always brutal. The death rate is astronomically high. I cannot change that. It is the way it must be. You need to push yourself harder than you ever have. If there is a puppet master working in the shadows, the odds will be stacked against you even more.”

“Can you help?” Milly asked, her fear returned three-fold over.

Luna shook her head, “There was a cycle where the gods were overly attached to the species. They created a God Contest that coddled the participants to maximize the survival rate. It ended in utter failure. The Nexus demands a true contest and a true victory. If I interfere in that process, everyone will die. The best I can do is try to identify and counter the puppet master and help the players in small and subtle ways. And I cannot play favorites.”

Milly could feel Luna grow tense, her arms stiff and shoulders raised. She could feel Luna was torn between her responsibility and her desire to help.

“Everything will be alright, Luna. You can do this. And so can we.” Milly assured her, “Have confidence.”

Milly held her for a while, until she felt Luna relax again. Eventually, she heard Luna yawn. The yawn of an exhausted child struggling to stay awake.

“Do you have a bed here, young lady?” Milly asked, “You need to get some sleep.”

“I’m not tired,” Luna said, rubbing her eyes.

Milly smiled and picked Luna up in her arms. “Which way?”

Luna pointed to a small alcove on the other side of the room. Milly carried Luna over and saw a tiny bed pressed tightly against the wall. It had a single pillow and no blanket and looked like a makeshift cot more than a bed. It reminded her of Rain’s storeroom-turned-bedroom, only much smaller. She felt sorry for Luna.

She laid Luna on her bed and sat next to her, stroking her hair. Luna pressed her back against the wall, gripping the edge of the pillow as a child would hold a teddy bear.

“You…still have another question,” Luna said, another yawn escaping as she spoke.

“I guess…how do I get out of here?” Milly laughed.

“That doesn’t count,” Luna murmured. “I have to tell you that anyway. It’s the door on the other end of the chamber you fell into. Just go through it and you will be back in the Arena.”

Luna was struggling to keep her eyes open now as sleep found her despite her efforts to stay awake.

“Then…I guess my third question is…can I visit you again?”

Luna smiled, her eyes closed. “I think I would like that. Any backdoor will bring you here. Mom built them throughout the Contest when she and father were building it.” She yawned again, her eyes closing.

A moment later, Luna was snoring softly, exhaustion finally overwhelming her.

Milly rose quietly, careful not to disturb her. “Poor thing,” she whispered, her fear of this mysterious director dissolved away as Luna’s tiny snores filled the air. “She looks cold.”

Milly opened her inventory, taking out her black hoodie, and laid it across Luna’s shoulders. Luna relaxed in her sleep and her snores faded into peaceful breaths. “Here, Luna, you need this more than I do. I am strong enough without it now.”

Milly left her to sleep, walking past the monitors and watching just long enough to see Rain and Calista complete their scenarios and exit into the reward area. She did not touch anything. This was Luna’s world, and she did not want to break the trust extended to her.

There was still a conflict racing in Milly’s mind, trying to bring together her understanding of Luna the child and Luna the Director. The Director was smart, articulate, and knew her place within the world around her. But the child was… well… a child. Insecure and scared, abandoned in a world too big for her and forced to grow up far too fast.

“Oh, Luna, you poor girl,” Milly muttered as she reached the exit from the control room, a simple metal door as one might see at the back of a warehouse. She decided that the two Lunas would need to live together in her mind, separate but together.

A Director who was guiding the contest and a frightened little girl, without anyone to care for her.

“I’ll come back, Luna,” Milly promised to herself, “So you don’t need to be alone.”

And with that, Milly opened the heavy metal door, and stepped out into the light beyond.