It was finally her break day, and she had a lot to talk to her parents about. The couple had heard about Lizbeth and had called her to ask what was going on. Anna didn't want to panic them so she lied, saying that the redhead had an awful case of the flu. She didn't want to worry them after they hadn't seen her for so long.
The trolley ride to her house was silent, with her falling asleep twice. Both times she had been awakened by the blaring horn and robotic voice of the cart announcing the stop they were at. Her stop was second to last, with her getting off to see her tired mother crying on the platform.
The woman was still in her work uniform when she ran over and picked her up into a tight hug. Anna could feel the sweat that was on her mother's face, along with the smell of dinner clinging to her clothing.
She must have started dinner before rushing to meet her at the station. Normally, she would go home alone, but those times Anna would visit every weekend. This occasion she hadn't gone to see them for the entire month for longer than a single evening.
After a good ten minutes, the woman let her go, grabbed hold of her face, and kissed her on the forehead. “Eliana! Have you been eating well? Have you gotten any rest? You look exhausted.” Her mother spoke a mile a minute as she fretted over the girl.
“Mom, I ate before I got on the trolley and slept the entire ride.” She smiled and let herself savor the warm feeling gathering in her tummy. It reminded her of old life.
Anna didn't love this woman the way she loved her old mother. But the girl was incredibly grateful for the care she showed and the sacrifices she constantly made. This woman had loved her daughter before the seizure and she had no intentions to ruin that love.
So, she basked in the forehead kisses, tight hugs, and loving jabs the woman gave her when they were together. She didn't know what she felt for her, but she knew she didn't want her hurt. Anna was planning to never tell either of the adults the truth about Eliana's fate. She smiled and blushed as the women told her sleeping on a trolley was dangerous.
The middle-aged woman's face became sour as she looked at her daughter closely. Her mother commented on the lack of meat on her bones and joked that the academy wasn't feeding her enough.
She pinched her arm skin, gently of course, before telling her dinner would be done soon. From the way the woman was acting, she had been waiting for this moment the entire day. She was practically bouncing in her work loafers as she spoke to the teenager.
“Your father tried to cut up the vegetables for the stew, but you know how clumsy he is with knives. I had to stop by to get a pre-cut bag from the store to replace what he butchered. But as long as you like it, the trouble was worth it!” Her mother held her hand as they walked towards where the family cat sat parked.
The car was pretty old, but could drive a decent distance before chugging. She saw that her mother had reclined the back seat to make room for her bags. “Mom, you don't have to do all that for me. I'll bring dinner next time I'm allowed to visit.”
Anna frowned as she said this and repressed a sigh. She wasn't exactly sure if she could visit next month. Or even the month after. Since she had picked out her and Edwin’s tattoos, she'd been told things were moving fast.
Behind the scenes, the academy had decided to announce the Koinonos earlier than they thought. So, instead of everyone finding out after their break period, they'd be told by the end of the month. She had been upset by this, but voicing her anxiety wasn't possible.
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Priestess Adsila had expressed how huge of an opportunity this was and how she had fought hard for her to be chosen. Anna needed this to advance her career and to keep a steady flow of income in this life. But dear Goddess, she was terrified of her future as a priestess.
At any day, Edwin could be called to work as a healer on the field and she would have to follow. This assignment could be in a new country with a language she couldn't speak and customs she was oblivious to. She was scared of the responsibilities and her parents wouldn't be happy with the news.
They had been somewhat okay with her going to the academy but then effectively becoming a soldier? Her poor mother would be inconsolable, and her father would beg her to step down. She swallowed her thoughts and gave her mother a big grin as she got into the car. “Have you and Dad been getting my letters from school?”
“We have honey, and we are so proud of you. Ranking so high in such a prestigious school after everything that's happened…you're so strong, Eliana. I should've known that a baby who had me in labor for 48 hours could do anything she fought for.” Her mother gushed as she drove them home, her eyes growing wet with tears.
Seeing this made Anna look away and try not to throw up. Her mask was pristine, but she couldn't just turn off her feelings. She hated that the woman was so proud of her and so happy that she was becoming successful. Because soon that immense success would be the reason they'd never see each other as often.
She felt guilty that she had to sit and smile during the visit while she lied the entire time. If she knew the truth, that she's about to be branded as a warrior, her mother would faint. The woman made it clear she wanted her to stay in their hometown post graduation.
That once her schooling was done, she didn't want her in any form of combat. As there was no active war or interstate conflict going on, that required enlistment. Both of her parents were vocal in the past about how they wished she had pursued research or traditional magic. But those intro lectures were too boring for Anna. Being a part of the combat course gave her the funds and excitement she craved. Her mother had accepted it and eventually came to be proud of her studies.
But being a Koinonos, a marked soldier was on another level. “Eleonora said she will be sending you a care kit when she has the time. The baby has been tiring her out. Apparently, he can't stomach anything besides breast milk.” She mentioned one of her older sisters cheerfully. “You were the same until solids came into question.”
“Ugh. I'm never having kids.” Again, Anna thought to herself suddenly. You are never having kids in this life. She tried not to upset herself and scoffed in fake disgust at the mention of a baby. “They're smelly and always want to cry loudly.”
Her mother rolled her eyes. “You didn't cry very much, and neither did your sister. Emma was the only one who cried and boy, was she a screamer. I would be sick with worry as she'd cry until she fell asleep. But none of you were ever smelly.”
Thankfully, the topic of children dropped soon after this. Anna didn't like to sit on the people she left behind in her previous life. She had died years after giving birth to multiple children who were adults now. At first she had debated looking them up.
She wanted to see if they followed in her footsteps instead of their father's. But eventually, as she aged and started to lose more recollection of the exact details her memories held, she gave up on the idea. This wasn't some very fairy tale where she'd shown up as a child on their mansion's doorstep.
She could tell them old stories and what she used to call them as toddlers, but she doubted they remembered. Her kids had been too young when she died, and she feared they'd been raised by another woman. Whether it be a nanny or a stepmother, she knew deep down that someone had taken her place.
It hurt her, but Anna knew looking into their lives wouldn't do anything but cause her harm. Still, she thought about it every once in a while. In her dorm, she would lay in bed thinking of a life where she met her grandchildren.
It was stupid to do as she always came to the same conclusion: that life would have never lived up to her expectations. The childish daydreams of four children who were sophisticated, gorgeous and loved her unconditionally.
By the time her life was coming to a tragic end, those things hadn't come true. Morwenna dying wasn't the answer, but Anna living a good life without a husband or child was. That's the only way she could think about the situation without going mad with grief. There was no one she could talk to about this pain, as everyone thought she was Eliana.
They weren't wrong exactly. She did feel like some part of the child hadn't died that day. She could remember events and feelings that weren't from anything Morwenna had been present for. After talking to her sisters and parents, she had come to realize they were remnants of things Eliana had done or witnessed. It would seem that the reincarnation had just melded the two of them together. Whatever was left in the empty husk that was the ten-year-old was consumed by her that day.
It made her uncomfortable, so she didn't think about it too long. Anna held her head in her hand as they rounded the sharp turn that led straight into their driveway. She could see that both of her sister's cars were there along with her brother-in laws. Briefly, she closed her eyes and told herself to keep it together. Everyone had made a huge dinner just for her, and she wasn't going to ruin it.
“You've been keeping a secret from me, haven't you?” Her mother's words made her eyes fly open, and she looked at the woman in confusion. The words that came out of her mouth made her stomach sink. “You never told me that you had a boyfriend!”