“Do it.”

“I can see that this means a lot to you so before we get started I should explain a few things.”

As he spoke he went to the kitchen to wash up his plates.

“I can’t snap my fingers like a genie and bring forth your memories.”

“How difficult is it?”

“The difficulty isn’t in actually doing it” Neugdae clarifies “but making sure that you survive the experience…mentally.”

For Neugdae delving into someone’s mind is a simple thing even when he was a novice. For the most part he found people’s minds to be so delicate at times that he felt like a particularly large bull in a China shop. He has to be very careful where and how he treads as it is easy to break things and you really don’t want to ‘break’ something in someone’s mind.

Despite the severity of his warnings and the implications Soyun couldn’t help but quip “so…very difficult to do then?”

Neugdae paused ‘just roll with it.’

“Yeah basically” finishing up the dishes he turned towards her “there is probably no-definitely a good reason why you blocked those memories in the first place and uncovering them will cause some kind of mental backlash. Depending on the severity it could put a permanent mental scar on you.”

Soyun pursed her lips, weighing her options before giving her answer “I still want to do it. I…I didn’t think too much about this stuff before but” she licked her lips “if this whole thing with the Noble Bloods and the Pureblood controlling them might have something to do with my past I can’t just sit on information like this when it could give me some answers.”

Neugdae met her unwavering gaze for a moment before nodding “alright, let’s get started then.”

A few minutes later found Soyun in his bedroom lying on his bed and looking awkward about it.

“Um, is this necessary?”

“Which part?”

“Laying here” she answered with faint red dusting on her pale cheeks.

Neugdae stared at her “are you feeling embarrassed?”

“No…”

Neugdae couldn’t help but smirk down at her “is this your first time?”

“W-what?”

“Don’t worry I’ll be gentle.”

Soyun sputtered for a bit her cheeks getting redder until she saw his clear amusement and scowled “that’s not funny!”

“It is pretty funny actually” he insisted “we’re about to unearth some of your past mental trauma and you’re somehow hung up on being in a boy’s room for the first time” he shook his head “you have weird priorities.”

“Shut up! And it’s easy for you to say. I bet this isn’t your first time getting a girl in your bedroom” she muttered with a pouty look.

“Believe it or not it is.”

“I don’t believe you.”

“Just because I’m tall, dark and handsome and women find me very attractive doesn’t mean I’m some playboy womanizer. I find guys like those to be unreliable, shallow, indecisive, cowardly and useless individuals and frankly I’m offended you even compared them to me.”

Soyun gaped for a moment before stuttering out an apology “s-sorry.”

He waved her off “its fine, now close your eyes and steady your breathing.”

She did as she is told drawing on Father Joseph’s training about maintaining calm in hectic situations.

“You might feel a slight pressure, just ignore it.”

The moment he said this she felt it but only just and before she could even properly react Soyun was no longer there.

~O~

Her eyes snapped open with a gasp immediately noticing that not only is she no longer in Neugdae’s room but she isn’t even lying down anymore. She also noted that she is in her vampire form. Her attention however is immediately taken by the sights surrounding her. Imagine a bright cloudless sky except the ‘sky’ was taken up by a literal web of vivid images simultaneously playing in silence.

“Where am I?”

“We’re inside your mind palace.”

The voice caused Soyun to jump and whirl around to glare at her Sunbae “don’t do that!”

“Sorry” he apologized.

Soyun found it disconcerting that he is able to sneak up on her in the first place but calmed herself.

“So what is a Mind Palace?”

“Basically the visual representation of your mind” he answered and looked around “you do a lot of cloud watching?”

Her brows furrowed “no.”

“What about stargazing?”

“Not really but sometimes I stare at the moon.”

“I see what you mean…literally”

It took Soyun a moment to realize what he meant as while she was talking the scenery changed becoming darker. The web of images suddenly coalesced into one showcasing what she knew to be a memory of the last time she found herself staring at the full moon from the rooftop balcony of her former home. Her eyes widened in shock as she once again found herself staring at the familiar visual and getting just as drawn into it as before.

Before she could lose herself however a hand touched her shoulder taking her out of it. Blinking several times Soyun looked over her shoulder at Neugdae who shook his head.

“It’s easy to get drawn into these memories and it’s hard to come out until its run its course so best not to look too deeply into them.”

“Right, so what do we do now?”

Neugdae looked around and Soyun swore she could almost feel something happening right then.

“What are you doing?”

“Trying to find where we’re supposed to go.”

“I can feel that.”

“You mean you couldn’t before?” he said in mild confusion before grunting “that’s alarming, for you anyway.”

“What do you mean?”

“It means…” he dragged out his eyes narrowed in a particular spot “your memories might not be the only thing being blocked in here.”

This content has been misappropriated from Royal Road; report any instances of this story if found elsewhere.

“What?”

“Found it” he interrupted before the world around them suddenly blurred.

It is only because Soyun is used to moving at high speeds that she isn’t caught completely off guard by the acceleration. It did feel discomforting however as her feet were planted while the world passed her by. When they stopped Soyun could not help but gape at the sight before her. They stood on a cliff overlooking where the veritable collage of memories in the sky ended and is replaced with what looked to be images that were cracked in one or more places and some are even shattered beyond recognition.

“What is this?”

“These are your repressed memories…or a visual representation of them in any case” Neugdae scratched his head.

Soyun stared at the sight in both horror and wonder. It wasn’t just that the images were like a collage of broken mirrors but that even the ones that weren’t too badly damaged she could not make out. It’s like staring at a mosaic censorship.

‘Maybe I can’ her eyes squinted as she attempted to peer at the image.

Suddenly the visual is obscured by Neugdae’s hand “hey!”

Her protest is cut off however at the scowl Neugdae gave her “what did I just say? Don’t look too deep into the memories. Doing it this deep into your mind is going to make it a vivid dream for you. That’s for regular memories” he pointed at the collection of broken mosaic collage “trying that with these and best case scenario you get the mother of all migraines. Worst case scenario you become as broken as those things.”

Soyun flinched a bit but nodded “right, sorry.”

The man huffed a little before frowning at the broken memories “this is going to be harder than I thought.”

“How so?”

“Assembling this stuff is going to be like piecing together a complex 3D puzzle except I have to fish around the void for the missing pieces” he groaned.

“If it’s too much you don’t have to do it. I’ve survived this long without those memories so I’ll be fine without them.”

Even though she would always be asking questions and wondering about it.

Neugdae shook his head “that’s not an option anymore. Things have gotten complicated and you need those memories back if you want to survive.”

That got her attention and she looked at him in confusion “why?”

“From what I figure this trauma you have has done more than repress your memories. You know how in fiction and folklore vampires have these blatantly supernatural powers like hypnotism, shapeshifting, flight, teleportation, shadow manipulation and such.”

“Yeah, but vampires can’t do that…right?”

“No, they can” Neugdae confirmed.

“What?”

“Those powers are exclusive mainly to Purebloods. A few Noble Bloods might be able to access them but it’s mainly Purebloods that show these abilities” he added.

“I can’t do any of that.”

Soyun has a pretty good handle on her abilities and aside from being much stronger, faster and more durable than any vampire she’s come across she didn’t have any blatantly supernatural powers. Unless you count perfect night vision and the ability to sense vampires which she didn’t.

“Right and that’s the problem” he frowned “the trauma damaged your psyche to the point where it’s deprived you of the full scope of your Pureblood abilities.”

“How does that even work?”

“Those special powers are psychic abilities.”

“Like yours?”

“On the surface but trust me, what I do and what vampires do are wildly different in practice.”

She didn’t know what that meant and she opted not to ask, it sounded complicated enough as it is.

Instead she focused on the matter at hand “so I don’t have these powers because of my repressed memories and trauma. Since the abilities are mental in nature the trauma ended up locking them off from me?”

“Yeah the trauma is like your limiter. I wouldn’t be surprised if, abilities aside, you’re not as strong as you should be.”

“I’ve never felt as if I’m weaker than I could be.”

“How would you know if you never remembered what you were like before you got amnesia?”

Soyun opened her mouth, closed it and conceded “good point.”

Neugdae shrugged “it’s just a theory. In any case this is going to take more than a single session to fix and not just because it’s going to be difficult either. You’ll be relieving those memories once I fix them and well they are repressed for a reason.”

Soyun winced “yeah take as much time as you need, I’m not exactly looking forward to reliving my childhood trauma.”

“I doubt your entire childhood is traumatic, more like something really bad happened.”

“And what, my brain decided to erase a decade of my life?”

“Like I said the mind is a weird place” he then cricked his knuckles with a sigh “alright let’s get started.”

He stretched out his hand and all Soyun knew was white.

???

A little girl sat on one of the swings in a playground. She had pale skin, brown hair and brown eyes. As it was late in the evening approaching sunset the playground was devoid of any other children or people in general. Not that it would have made a difference as her particular situation did not lend itself to being generous for her social life.

First she was relatively new to the community with her family only having moved in not so long ago. Second she was homeschooled by her parents who didn’t allow her to attend public school for…very valid if frustrating reasons. Since this was a relatively small community where everyone knew each other all the other kids her age went to the same school leaving her as the odd one out.

It also didn’t help that she had no social skills to speak of (hard to when you don’t spend time with people her own age). Because of this she was deemed an outsider to be ignored, avoided, scorned or gossiped about but never to be approached or engaged with. It made for a rather sad existence at the moment as the precious freedom with which she had been afforded by her parents was instead being used to mope at a deserted playground.

She tried to use the various playground instruments to derive some kind of satisfaction however it just wasn’t the same without others to enjoy it with. Whatever excitement could be had was already dried up and the experience became rather hollow.

Another sigh escaped her lips ‘why did I come here?’

It wasn’t as if this was her first time coming to the playground. She had been here hours prior when there were other kids there but after her last approach ended in disaster she opted not to make the same mistake twice. Instead she watched them from afar, observing them, committing names and faces to memory for when she would build up the confidence to make another approach. The nuances of such a rather tactical method was completely lost on her however as it was completely incidental.

She was just too shy to try again after having her feelings hurt before. It made her frustrated and as the frustration at her situation mounted she picked up the sound of footsteps approaching. The area was so quiet that she would have heard the footsteps even if her hearing wasn’t enhanced. She ignored it or tried to however there was a brief pause in the footsteps before they resumed coming closer to her instead.

Then a voice spoke up “hey.”

Despite being aware of their presence the entire time Soyun still flinched at the sound and ever so slowly looked over her shoulder at the speaker. A boy in his mid teens just a few years older than her stood, wearing a school uniform and carrying a messenger bag slung over his shoulder.

“H-hello…” she stuttered.

“I’ve seen you sitting alone in the playground for a few days now, is everything alright?”

Her parents gave her extensive warnings about strangers and what she shouldn’t do when faced with one however she couldn’t help but be disarmed by his tone and appearance. No matter how she sliced it this person did not feel like a threat to her by any stretch. Normally that wouldn’t have been enough for her to drop her guard however the rejection from the other kids and the ensuing loneliness did well to soften her up so to speak. Still she knew better than to spill everything and instead only relayed her grievances with the other kids at the playground.

“That sounds horrible” he spoke sympathetically from next to her having taken a seat on the unoccupied swing.

Soyun nodded at his words.

“But why stay out here by yourself then?”

Soyun pursed her lips which would have looked contemplative on an adult however on a ten year old it looked like an adorable pout.

“Don’t wanna go home yet” she eventually answered.

“Why not?”

Soyun didn’t really know how to articulate her answer with the complex mess of emotions plaguing her so she instead shook her head with that same pout taking on an edge of stubbornness.

It made the man laugh “well if that’s how you’re going to be then I guess I can keep you company.”

His words startled her for some reason. Perhaps it was because she didn’t see a reason why a total stranger would do that. Or maybe she was just surprised anyone would at this point considering all the mean things those kids said to her before. While she had been speaking he went into his bag and took out a book whose cover immediately got her attention.

“What’s that?”

“Since it looks like we’re going to be here for a while I thought I’d get some reading done” he paused as he regarded her “would you like me to read it for you?”

Soyun would be lying if she said she wasn’t at least a bit curious about the content given the colorful cover.

Soyun nodded and he smiled before it dawned on him “you know we still haven’t introduced ourselves.”

Soyun felt her cheeks burn. Her parents always instilled common courtesy within her so to forgo such a simple thing felt embarrassing.

“I-I’m Soyun!” she ended up blurting out in a stutter which only caused her cheeks to enflame even more.

She scowled when he started chuckling at her mishap and upon seeing her glare he abruptly cut himself off.

“My name is…”

Right then and there the world seemed to slow. She hadn’t noticed it before but ever since she started talking the background became more blurred until it started disappearing completely. The process was slow going at first but at this stage the two were surrounded by a white void. Even the swing seemed to be attached to nothing yet somehow holding their weight.

The only patch of reality being a bubble encompassing the two of them and as he gave her his name she realized something. Up until that point she hadn’t actually been able to make out the details of his appearance aside from general things. Now the details became clearer, his lanky frame, somewhat pale skin, dark eyes, a short bowl cut hair and a kind smile directed at her.

He spoke his name the moment she realized who he is.

“Ryom Yong-Su.”

~To Be Continued~