January 14th, 2015

Not trying to be dramatic, but there's always been this black cloud looming over me, haunting me, threatening to flood my surroundings and wash me away. Once it began to downpour, it 

wasn't long before I was in way over my head. Defending myself seemed impossible, especially after my reputation had been destroyed within twenty-four hours after my arrest. Not just by the media, but even by those I had trusted and once loved. Everything that I was working for, everything that I achieved disappeared without a trace overnight and I became the poster boy for capital punishment. Some would like to believe I'm an emotionless zombie, a heartless killer who gained satisfaction from taking a young life, but nothing is further from the truth. The day Aubrey died was one of the most heartbreaking days of my life. I loved her, she was my friend, my lover, someone very close and dear to my heart. It took a long time for me to accept the rational fact that she wasn't coming back. I could carve a Pentagon on the floor and sacrifice my mother's cat, but it won't bring her back. If it did, I would have done it in a heartbeat and maybe she would've gotten me out of this mess a lot sooner. 

This book was originally published on Royal Road. Check it out there for the real experience.

Yet, with experience comes strength. I learned a lot while I was incarcerated, but the greatest thing I was able to retain was patience. My patience and faith in God is what helped me survive 

and the love from my family and friends kept me fighting. My heart is full from those who have stood by me over the years and those who have reached out recently to show their support. I'm thankful for this chance to move on to become an essential member of society again and I promise to finally lead the life I was meant to live 20 years before.