Two-and-a-half months later the burning in my soul still persisted. It had gotten slightly better but at this rate it would be years until I was back to where I was before Kalesa ripped out the gifts she had given me. I sat on the back porch running my fingers through Jirah’s hair as he lay in the sun. I closed my eyes and tried to focus on my anger to meditate and block out the pain, but this wasn’t something physical.
The pain continued but I pushed it to the side. I’d experienced this kind of pain all my life, it was like the pain of heartbreak or losing a loved one but without the emotions tied to that pain just a deep-seated ache that refused to go away. My other hand dropped the last of the cymanthia berries into a jar.
“Two-hundred-and-sixty-three,” I said finishing counting. “Divided by two that’s enough for one-hundred-and-thirty-one more days for me and Guinevere or just about four months.”
Not long enough for Guinevere to give birth, Karnen said. You’ll need to find a way home or another way to stave off mana starvation before then.
I’d been putting this off for long enough already just enjoying my time to relax and not be threatened by constant imminent death for a change.
“What do we have to do that?” I asked.
To turn your world magical or return home? Karnen asked.
“Either, I suppose,” I said.
Your Storm Soul, Ares said. Your best bet is finding a storm and absorbing the lightning from it to power a portal to get back or bleed off enough mana to jumpstart your world.
“Jump start?” I asked.
You put a little bit of mana in the world and creatures and plants will start to evolve with it, they’ll produce it naturally and over time more and more mana will occur naturally.
“I don’t exactly have time to wait around for my world to evolve into an environment I could survive in,” I said.
There is another way, The Shadow growled.
That made me pause, the Shadow never talked. It might snarl or let out some jab or cutting insult or threat, but it never talked.
“What?” I asked.
I was hesitant to ask this darker part of myself what it thoughts were and wondered if I really wanted to know.
Magma Hearts, The Shadow said. Go into a major city and just let loose. A few hundred thousand kills will create enough mana to really kick start this world.
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“I’m not going to start a massacre,” I said flatly.
Why not, we did it before, the Shadow growled. Have you forgotten Camelot already?
“There was a reason for Camelot,” I said feeling a hot flush of anger and shame.
The Shadow laughed. You can lie to yourself, but you can’t lie to me. You loved that battle, I felt it within you, you wanted to really cut loose and prove to everyone that they were fools to ever have crossed your path. This world is unprotected you could be a god here, the god.
“I’ve never had any desire to be worshiped or to rule,” I said. “I just prefer to be on top instead of the one taking orders, I’m already on top her.”
This world is weak, it deserves to be conquered. The Shadow snarled. Did Kalesa take your balls when she removed you as the Warlord or did you lose those before.
“Enough!” I snapped. “That is not an option. I’ll get some weather app or something and try to get to the next storm to test things.”
---
Amanada took Guinevere to an ultrasound clinic. Guinevere was nervous and had made her pick a clinic with only female doctors. She thought back to a conversation she’d had with Modred about her amulet. Her hand went up to the artifact pressed against her throat, Modred could destroy Artifacts but doing so while she was wearing it…. She hadn’t seen it but she remembered him talking about when he first destroyed an Artifact and it exploded.
Considering the chocker was around her throat she wouldn’t live through that experience. Even the mana drain wouldn’t effect the Artifact, well not for at least a hundred years or so. Its internal power stores would be more than enough to bear the strain of being active in a mana zero environment for years before it started to even show any signs of suffering.
“Just lay down here,” the nurse told her.
She was an elderly woman who reminded her of Mistress Talsbrand. The thought she would never see her old governess again momentarily pained her but she didn’t even know if she had lived through the battle of Camelot or not. She might have escaped with the other palace servants but… there was no way to know.
The women bustled around her and she relaxed as Amanda chatted with them.
The doctor placed the sensor on her belly and she laughed as the smooth gel was applied.
“So we have a healthy baby girl here,” the doctor said with bright smile.
Guinevere looked at the screen. A tiny baby in fuzzy black and white glyphs was shown. Guinevere felt her heart skip a beat as she touched her belly and seeing her baby girl react to her touch. All other words that were said disappeared as she could do nothing but watch her little baby filled with a terrible resolve to never let anything happen to that baby.
“Have you thought of a name for her yet?” the doctor asked.
“I didn’t know she was a girl,” Guinevere said. “I actually haven’t thought of any names seriously yet.”
“Well, you should discuss it with your husband,” she said. “She’ll be here before you know it.”
Guinevere looked out the window as Amanada drove them back home. She’d known she was going to be a mother; she had carried this child for more than three months already but… It hadn’t been until she’d seen those little hands and feet. Heard her baby’s heart beating in time with her own that the weight of that full responsibility had come to her.
She found Mordred in their room, his stylus in hand working with Mab.
“What’s wrong?” he asked.
Guinevere curled up beside him laying her head on his shoulder.
“I love you,” she said.
Mordred smiled and set Mab aside. “Are you alright?” he asked.
“I just saw our daughter today I…. I feel like I could fight the world if I had to,” she said.
“Our daughter?” Mordred asked his hand traveling down the skin of her back sending a shiver through her as he moved it over the taught skin of her swollen belly.
“Yes, we’re going to have a little girl,” Guinevere said closing her eyes and relaxing into the strength of Mordred’s touch.