The next few years were passed with Father training me in my foresight, though at a lesser load than he had bean with, playing with the other girls of the Patrons and Mother occasionally instructing us in the disciple of etiquette. This changed when we turned ten.

The night after my birthday party, as he was putting us to bed he told me. “It would be good to begin your formal education. Of course, the formal education of girls is highly unorthodox . However, you aren’t exactly an orthodox girl. Tomorrow morning you will begin your understanding of the world. ”

The next morning after breakfast, I followed dad to a section of our house that had no walls but did have a domed roof supported by several marble columns. Under this roof was a similar arrangement to the Forum, only smaller. In the semicircular stands there were around a dozen boys about a year older than me. Each was holding a was tablet and stylus identical to what Kentro had used to record Id’s predictions ten years prior . Dad handed me one of these and pointed to where I should stand. The boys in the room gave me an odd look and a few whispered, as if confused by my presence, but said nothing. Dad walked onto the platform and stood in the middle.

I examined the tablet. It was two wooden rectangles bound together with loops of leather. Opening it showed that the inside had been dug out and filled with wax. This meant that there was a wooden border that held the wax in place. The stylus was made of white material; one end was pointed, and the other was flat.

“Let’s begin today’s lesson with simple addition,” Dad began. “What is eleven plus fifteen?”

The boys began using their styli to etch their calculations into the wax tablet. I turned to do the same. By the time I was done everyone else already had their tablets presented to father. I quickly drew a circle around my ‘XXV’ and presented it. By now Father was already looking at each of the answers the others had given, nodding in the affirmative, but when he looked at my answer he had an apologetic look his face. “Sorry Philena, that’s incorrect,” he told me.

I took another look at my answer, realized my mistake, and wrote an additional ‘I’ before re-presenting it to Dad, who nodded. After he had gone through all the answers, the boys took the flat end of their styli and scrapped it against the wax to erase it. The slates were cleaned, leaving no trace of anything written on them.

The day continued like that: Dad would teach us a new mathematical principle and then ask us questions to ensure we had a grasp of it. Some I got right the first time, and others I did not, but I was always last.

After laying down to sleep that evening, I said to the others, “I don’t understand. We are supposed to be exceptional. Father Dad wouldn’t have made an exception for us otherwise.”

“I don’t know why you are so bad at math either,” commented Id.

“Oh, shut up,” I retorted. “If you knew the answers, then you would have volunteered them. Besides, you were too busy complaining about being bored.”

“I feel like we should be better as well,” said Eth. “I don’t know why we aren’t.”

“Part of the problem is the numbers. It makes no sense,” I complained. “Mostly it’s the way the information is flowing – it’s way too inefficient.”

After a moment of thinking I added, “Eth, I want you to make numbers make sense. I’ll see if I can fix our mental structure. Id… you get your sleep.”

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The next morning Id woke with a start. “I am starving,” she announced. “I need food now!”

“Yes, yes, we know you are hungry in the morning,” I replied.

“No, this is like nothing I’ve experienced,” she insisted. “We are going to die if we don’t eat now… what in the world did you do?” Id finally noticed the changes I had made overnight.

“Do you like it?” I asked.

“Everything is so solid… and interconnected,” she said, forgetting her hunger for a moment.

“Yes,” I replied. “I saw fit to give our mind some real structure.”

“Wait, do I?” Seriously though. Food. Now!”

“Very well,” I said, giving in.

At breakfast Eth explained the idea of using a number to represent nothingness, I congratulated Eth on this innovation.

“Dear, are you well?” asked Mother with a look of concern on her face. Father, my younger siblings , and even some of the servants were staring at me. I realized I had been letting Id eat without regard to manner, custom, rate, or amount. Eth’s new system had so engrossed me that I had entirely neglected my drink .

“That was your second loaf, and you want another?” Mother continued. I noticed that my hand was paused in midair while reaching for a third loaf of bread from one of the servants. I slowly put both hands in my lap.

“Just hungry this morning is all,” I answered. Mother did not look mollified.

“Are you in a condition to be educated today?” asked Father.

“Oh yes, for certain,” I said, nodding my enthusiasm.

“Very well,” said Father skeptical.

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At the learning hall, Father became my teacher once more. “Let’s see if yesterday’s lessons fell out of your heads last night,” he said, giving us a similar problem from yesterday. This time I was the third person to show my slate. Father saw our answer, gave a small smile, and nodded. After a few more problems, Father paused when he saw the answer I gave.

“Is it incorrect?” I asked.

“No…” he hedged. “Keep your answer. I want to come back to it after I finish with everyone else.”

After all the boys in the room had the right answer, Father asked me to bring him my tablet.

“What is this symbol here?” he asked pointing to Eth’s numeral, 0.

Conveying Eth’s sheepishness, I said, “It’s a number I came up with to make things easier.”

“Our numbers aren’t good enough for you?” asked Father.

“Be careful Ego,” Id reminded me. “There are people watching us.”

“Yeah, please don’t insult Father in front of everyone,” said Eth.

Ignoring both of their concerns, I said, “There was a missing piece.”

“What is missing?” Father asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Nothing ,” I answered.

Laughter came from the class. Father tried to suppress his own amusement and asked, “If nothing is missing then why add something?”

“Nothingness itself is what is missing,” I clarified.

Father shook his head. “You can’t have nothing,” he said, “for once you have it, it is now something.”

One of the boys sitting shouted from his stand, “Yeah, show us nothing. Point to it.”

“Stop this at once Ego,” said Id.

“Yes, please just go back to our stand,” agreed Eth. “It’s a dumb idea anyway. I don’t know what I was thinking.”

But it wasn’t a dumb idea. It was an excellent one.

I held out my hand, palm up, and asked, “How many horses am I holding ?” Then I made a circle with our other hand to make a 0. “When a river has run dry, how much water is in it? ” I made the 0 with our hand again. “How many silver coins does a destitute man have? ” I made the 0 with our hand a third time.

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Father remained silent through my rhetorical questioning and remained silent after it, considering my argument .

“We have never used nothing before,” came another voice from the stands. “Why should we start now?”

“While I understand your instinct here, son of Atticus, it is not an entirely correct one,” Father answered him. “Traditions are to be venerated, as by the test of time they have proven themselves. However, that does not mean our ancestors did everything perfectly. When a way comes along that is proven to be better , we must adopt it.”

Then he gave me a knowing look. “Not that you have properly proven your idea. Your example of the river doesn’t work, as there would be no river.”

“Exactly,” I responded, but Father still looked uncertain. I tried a different tactic. “Could you at least admit that the concept of nothing is useful?” I asked. I then went on to show how 0 would be used as a placeholder for making bigger numbers .

“Practicality as divorced from truth is not an idea with which I am comfortable,” Father said. Seeing my disappointed face, he added, “Nevertheless, you have at least convinced me that treating nothing as a something is worth considering. I will bring it to the attention of the patrons of the city and use the arguments you have used, but until then,” he leaned forward, “use only what I have taught you.”

We returned to our stand and made no disruptions for the rest of the lessons. Father Dad ended the lessons in math much earlier than he did the day before. I was beginning to mentally prepare for new lessons in grammar when he said, “You won’t be honing your literacy today. Instead, I will be taking advantage of the argument Philena made in math to begin your education in rhetoric and logic.”

He paused, then continued, “In particular we will be examining the arguments she made regarding the concept of ‘nothing’. The extended version of the argument I made is this: first, ideas exist. Second, anything you can name is an idea. Conclusion, by naming the concept of nothing, you have made it exist – which is a contradiction . Nothingness cannot exist.”

He paused to let us internalize the argument he had made, before continuing, “Philena responded by providing three counter examples. Logically, she only needed one . Since truth must be completely consistent, a single counter example is all that is needed to prove invalidity. By providing three she accomplished two things: first, she made her case more convincing by making mine seem not just incorrect, but badly thought out – this is called ‘rhetoric’. Second, she would have back-up counter examples in case one of them were shown to not apply – this is known as ‘strategy’.”

Father waited again before asking, “Can anyone find a flaw in the three counter examples, ‘how many horses do I have?’, ‘the dry river’, or ‘the destitute beggar’?”

I raised my hand.

“No, dear,” Father said. “I want everyone else to try debating. You can continue arguing for yourself later.” I put my hand down.

After a long moment Luke, son of Atticus, stepped up. “If it is correct to say that Philena has…” he turned to me and asked, “what’s the name of your nothing number?”

“Zero,” I answered.

“If it is correct to say that Philena has zero horses, then we must also say that Philena has zero cows, zero chickens, et cetera – we must say that Philena has zero of every animal,” he argued. “Then we must say that Philena has zero of every object, except for what she has. That is a lot of nothing.” He finished with a smirk.

“Good rhetoric, Son of Atticus, but bad logic,” Father told him. “If it were the case that nothingness existed, then it would follow that there would be multiples of it.”

After another pause, Gregory, youngest son of Aegeus, stepped up. “Regarding what Luke said: consider a fish. It must not know that water exists, for water is always present for a fish. There would be no reason for it to consider that there might be a place where there isn’t water. So, to a fish, water goes unnoticed – it would only realize there was something there when it’s caught by a fisherman. It is the same for nothingness. We are surrounded constantly by nothingness, unaware of its presence.”

“Same problem,” said my father. “Good rhetoric, but bad logic. “We are not surrounded by nothing; we are surrounded by the air we breathe, or by the people and objects around us, or even by the ground under our feet. This is not ‘nothing’, as these are tangible things. Even the fish is surrounded by water, which is something as soon as the fish realizes it was there.”

There was another long pause, then Evander, son of Leander, rose. “Nothingness is necessary,” he said.

My father raised an eyebrow. “Elaborate,” he instructed.

“Imagine a world where everything existed everywhere. It would be impossible to move, or breathe, or do anything really,” Evander argued. “So it is correct to say that Philena has zero of every animal and zero of every object in her hand, since if this were not the case then she couldn’t move her hand with everything in the way.”

After a moments’ consideration, Father said “Excellent rhetoric and reason . The construction of a world that followed the logical consequence of ‘nothingness’ not existing makes it sound ridiculous to the listener, as well as being logically sound.”

Evander beamed with pride, gave me a wink, then stepped back down.

“Now that we have established the idea that ‘zero’ is a legitimate concept,” said Father moving the lesson forward, “I want to cover what Philena did when I wasn’t immediately convinced by her counter examples. She conflated ‘usefulness’ with ‘truth’ – this is a dangerous idea. Can anyone think of why that is?”

There was a long silence. When Father realized that no answer from his students would come, he said, “I suppose I shouldn’t have expected you to answer. You are young, and thus your naiveté is understandable.” He shrugged, continuing, “Lies. A lie is useful to its liar. Should a man believe that his lies are truth, he could do all sorts of damage to himself and those around him, especially those he has convinced. A liar who knows that he speaks falsehood is limited by his conscience and can be forced to admit his deception by circumstance, but a man who believes his own lies is not limited by his conscience or circumstance. His lies are all the more convincing to others because he believes them, and there is no sign of deception on his face or body.

“Logic and rhetoric are tools, powerful ones,” he added. “Rhetoric is more powerful than a sword, for a sword is limited by its wielder, but rhetoric can raise an army. While there is a discipline that is more powerful than these, it has its roots in reason. Understand this: honesty is the most important virtue an educated man can have. Honesty to both himself and others. Am I understood?”

“Yes, sir,” we all said.

“Good. You are dismissed,” said Father. “We will be dropping arithmetic for now and will go forward with reason and morals tomorrow.”

As Father and I walked back to the main part of the house, he said, “Philena…”

“Whatever it is, can it wait?” Id requested. “I didn’t get enough food at breakfast.”

“May I have lunch first , father?” I asked.

“You already want lunch?” he repeated, surprised. “You had a large breakfast… oh, very well. I will have the cook prepare an early lunch.”

This time I made sure to adhere to manners and etiquette as I fed Id’s incredible appetite. Meanwhile, Father’s analytical eye was on me as though I was one of his scrolls, not once touching his food. Eth feared the consequences of this, but I fed Id nonetheless. I doubted Father would punish us for eating too much.

When we had finished, Father said, “I want you to tell me what is going on.”

“What do you mean?” I asked him as a servant cleared my plate.

“What is with this hunger you have developed?” he asked.

I shrugged. “I’m a growing girl, I guess,” I told him.

Father shook his head. “My appetite was greater during my adolescence than when I was a child, but it was not this sudden nor this extreme,” he pointed out.

“Must be different for girls,” I said, making up the excuse on the spot.

“I would agree,” Father said, “except that it would be less, not more, for women. Besides, I have never heard of young women inventing new numbers before their first blood .”

“Could you dismiss the servants first?” I asked him.

Father Dad waved a hand and the servants dispersed. I continued, “After the first day I felt like I had disappointed you.”

“So, you formalized the idea of nothing in a day to make me proud?” Dad asked, surprised.

I struggled to give a satisfactory explanation, but the only one I could provide would be the truth. Eth and Id urged me to not say anything, but if there was anyone we could trust it would be our Father.

“Dad, how many are in here for you?” I said, tapping my head.

“How many what?” Father asked confused.

“Voices,” I clarified, “intelligences.”

Father loudly exhaled, then said, “One. Is it not the same for you?”

“No,” I admitted. “There are a total of three, if you include me.”

“And who are these voices?” inquired Father.

“There is Id,” I began to introduce. “She is concerned with things like hunger and thirst. The base instincts. There is also Eth, who is only concerned with morality and other people. Then there is me, Ego, who mediates these two.”

Father stroked his beard, yet kept his face blank. “I assume you, Ego, are in control of the body in totality.”

I nodded “Yes, sir.”

“On the day ran off on your own, why did you do so? Did Id force you some how?” Father questioned.

“I didn’t exist that morning.” I answered. “Id woke up before Eth did and took control. I came into being during the fight that occurred between Id and Eth when you chastised us.”

Father nodded slowly “Has Id been in control since then?”

“No. Although I will allow her to speak out loud to make things simpler when you train her foresight. She and Eth have been restrained.” I explained.

“Good, a being who can see into the future and is perfectly selfish is quite dangerous. Ensure that she never gains control of your body.”

I nodded again. “Yes, sir.”

Father laced his fingers together and stared at me intently “Now, why didn’t you tell me about the structure of your mind sooner?”

I didn’t tell you this this before because I guessed it wasn’t normal.”

“It isn’t,” Dad confirmed. “You were correct in hiding this. Men who claim to hear thoughts that are not their own are called ‘crazy’ and cannot function in society.”

“They are going to kill us,” panicked Id. “They are going to kill us because we are out of the ordinary and thus a danger to them!”

“Father will be shamed,” Eth worried. “We have disappointed him. We’re a failure in his eyes. He won’t love us anymore.” I didn’t know what to say to them to calm them down, but I didn’t have to say anything.

“But I know you to not be crazy,” continued Father putting his hand on mine, calming both the panic and the shaking.

“I’m guessing it’s not normal to see the future or hear others’ thoughts, is it?” I asked.

Father chuckled. “No, it’s not,” he agreed.

“It’s Id that can see the future, and Eth who can read thoughts,” I explained. “Though Eth has refused to do so since you told her not to,” I added.

“What is it that you can do?” Father asked me.

“I – Ego that is – am not sure what it is exactly I do,” I admitted. “I can manipulate our mind, I guess. Last night I made our mind have more form and connection. I think that’s what made Id so hungry.”

“You made yourself smarter?” Dad asked, shocked.

“I suppose,” I shrugged.

There was a moment of silence before Dad said, “There are some who believe that the self can be divided into three parts. The raw animal desires, the morality, and the reason to compromise with the two.” He shook his head. “However, no one has ever claimed these to be to be distinct persons.”

“Dad, why am I not normal?” I asked him.

He opened his mouth to answer but closed it again. He thought for a long moment before saying, “There is a reason, but you aren’t old enough to know yet.” He saw the look on my face, adding, “I know that isn’t a satisfactory answer, but it will have to do for now. You aren’t ready to know.”

“When will I be ready?” I asked.

“I will make that decision when the time comes,” he said.