Darkness. It felt like an eternity floating in a depthless chasm. My whole body, though it felt numb and constricted, can move limitedly. I decided to remain in my current position, in which I am lying on my back, my limbs dangling freely. I felt empty, apathetic, and although my vision was clear amidst the void I am in, it slowly turned foggy until I was plunged in reminiscing a vividly triumphant but broken memory.

"I'll see you charged. In prison, some half-wit bruiser will make you his sweetheart.. and then you'll hang." I remarked mordantly, acid dripping from my tongue as I wanted nothing more than justice from the appalling horrors this grotesque abomination have committed.

"Indeed? A hysterical woman, former lunatic, roaring outrageous accusations against a respectable social architect and scientist? My God, Alice, who will believe you? I scarcely believe it myself." Yes. I too didn't believe it at first, since I was at mercy to this man. Dr. Bumby was one of my father's undergraduates. He freed me from Rutledge, offered me home and employment in the orphanage, but all of his actions have an ulterior motive. Hate is a mere understatement of what I feel for him. He killed my family, and the twisted monster made me think I was the one who killed them.

"You.. Monstrous creature! Such evil will be punished."

"By who? By what? Psychotic silly bitch. Your madness will be punished. Now leave. I'm expecting your replacement." I felt something inside me snapped. That was the last straw. Anger dwelled upon me and my grudge for him reached its peak. I turned around and was about to leave, but determination filled me and felt myself revert to wonderland Alice as I faced him again. I have been used and abused, but he will never destroy me.. Nor will I let him destroy any more lives. If no one can deliver justice from this man, then I will.

I allowed a smirk grace my lips as I saw the man's shocked face. May the weak London Alice he knew morph into Wonderland Alice and be imbued in his sight and soul, if he ever has one. Forevermore haunting him in his death, for I am his death.

Cheshire's voice rang in my head as I left the station, knowing all too well what I had done, my confusion apparent as I saw London and Wonderland merged. "Ah, Alice. We can't go home again. No surprise really. Only a very few find the way, and most of them don't recognize it when they do. Delusions, too, die hard with memory. Only the savage regard the endurance of pain as the measure of worth. Forgetting pain is convenient, remembering it: agonizing. But recovering the truth is worth the suffering and our Wonderland, though damaged, is safe in memory... for now."

I awoke. Sluggish and groggy, I stayed on my bed and rubbed my eyes, focusing my blurry vision on the ceiling. It has been a while since I dreamt of my past. Try as I might, I could never feel guilt pushing Bumby off the train, although I do regret to have let him die that easily. He deserved so much more. After that incident, I was still plagued by nightmares of the past, but it wasn't that horrifying anymore. I learned how to accept my dreams as just dreams, and then they no longer felt hostile, or more like I could never treat them hostile again. Wonderland has been infused with my reality, for better or for worse. I was able to act normally, and everyone had thought me cured for good. Although they were pitiful when they heard of Bumby's death, the memory of his death effaced from the society and was soon forgotten. Luckily, even though I reek of poverty, there was a little amount of money enough for me to live in a shack near our burnt manor, and I was able to find jobs and earn money, however I got them with much difficulty. In this xenophobic society, being a former mental was not easy for them to overlook.

At some times, when I am in complete control of my mind, Wonderland is separated and I can see the normal London, and I've been frequently getting better at controlling myself. However, the most peculiar thing has happened to me. I am able to go to the Otherlands. I have met so many interesting figures, so many who are different yet similar to me. I have met Jules Verne, discussing the nature of humanity and their fears; Richard Wagner, whose mind I have discovered through his opera. I had my fill of theater after though; I even had been stuck on the mind of Vincent Van Gogh, whose wonderland was a swirling, vibrant mess. His madness however paved an odd path of friendship between us.

Having unified the material and psychological worlds, I now embrace my.. power, which allows me to move freely between both realms. No longer limited by mortal constraints, I can enter into and manipulate the psychological worlds of others. I do not know exactly how or why, but I figured that I wasn't the only one who suffered. I have ventured into their minds and helped those in need - confronting manifestations of their psychological trauma, guiding them to resolution and tranquility. There is, however, a consequence. As I have travelled into the Otherlands, I was also trapped in the psychological world. Time flows differently within the Otherlands and reality. I have not aged, but seven decades has already passed and I still look like my 16 year old self. What felt like hours or days of disappearance in the Otherlands, was equivalent to months and years of absence here in reality. Realization only hit me when I thought I was just a few hours gone and was heading back to work, but when I returned, I actually have been gone for days.

From then on, I was more careful with treading into the Otherlands. I've worked til my bones visibly protruded my petite body, just so I could store food on my cupboard and be able to go more often into the Otherlands. It is the only way of retribution for being too blinded of my own problems. Paying for my sins through helping others is my vow, and I'm paying for it in a way that I only know.

Suddenly, I heard a rapping noise on my window. I sat up and stretched a bit then looked out the window. My eyes widened in surprise as I saw an ochre owl tapping its beak against the dirty, stained glass of my window. I quickly opened it and coughed as dust invaded my nostrils and throat. Right, I just got home yesterday and I wasn't particular in cleaning my own home. As soon as the window opened, the owl swooped in and a letter came flying down into my hands. The owl hooted and flew out, leaving me in utter confusion.

"What just happened.." I muttered, eyeing the letter in my hand with confusion and curiosity. It looked like an ordinary parchment with a red wax seal, and being the inquisitive creature that I am, I decided to open it. However, I heard a grumble and felt my stomach churning and eating my own guts. I sighed. Looks like the letter has to wait. Eating is the first priority.

I headed to the kitchen and first washed myself, then began filling the fireplace with wood. I lit matches and patiently waited for the wood to spark and smoke, then fanned it til fire was finally caught. I began washing my century old pan and took out what is left on my cupboard. Some canned meat and beans, and some potatoes. I'm running out of supply, and I better start finding work again to fill it up.

It's really surreal. It felt like only two years have passed, but the reality is, I was frequently gone for almost more than half a century. Things have changed, London has progressed and it is year 1942. I found out when I was in the city yesterday. It was a bizarre situation that I have yet to get used to, afterall, I have witnessed the city's progression too suddenly.

I stabbed the knife into the can and began opening it, pouring the beans on the already searing pan. When the beans were cooked, I placed it on my chipped plate and cooked canned meat next. This is my life, and although very pitiful, I am very grateful for my independence. Unlike when I was in the asylum, I had very little freedom and I was trapped by my own self. I have been trapped by my own madness. Even in the orphanage, I was trapped by my own memories, by Dr. Bumby, and mostly, by myself. Now.. I'm still trapped, but I no longer have too damaging inhibitions. Even if it takes my entire life, I will dedicate it to help others. To help them with their Wonderland. To help them not to become like me.

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The meat was cooked and I settled on the rickety table. I prayed, thanking a higher deity for my well being. Even if I am skeptical about God, but I see no harm in thanking for even the little things. It gives me a sense of thankfulness and peace. I begin eating, but was interrupted by someone knocking on my door.

"Excuse me! But is Ms. Liddell in here?" An older voice voice boomed throughout my little, decrepit shack. My eyes widened, shocked to have a visitor, much less someone still knowing I'm here. I panicked, not knowing what to do. They must have expected an elderly version of herself, but she isn't. Then an idea struck me. Even though ridiculous, I decided to go with it.

"Do wait!" I said and quickly dusted off my dress and unbolted the lock, opening the door as it gave a loud creak, obvious that the door's hinges were rusty and needed a bad case of oiling.

"Ah! Ms. Liddell! What a great pleasure to finally meet you!" The older man expressed with much jubilation. He was a sharply dressed middle aged gentleman with greying hair and beard. To have a sudden visitation by a complete stranger who knew who she was.. No. He must've been mistaken.

"Excuse me but I am-"

"Oh no need for pretense Ms. Liddell. I know very well that it is you. May I come in?"

I only nodded. Too shocked and unable to completely comprehend what is happening in front of me. In an instant, my eyes darted on the knife hidden on my kitchen drawer. Should this man try to do anything funny, I will defend myself. And if he does try to hurt me, I will not hesitate to murder once again.

"Relax Ms. Liddell. I am here to make you aware that you are not alone." The man smiled kindly, a smile that took me aback. His guard is completely down, his bright eyes twinkling in amusement as he sat on a nearby chair, the only chair in this house.

"What do you mean alone?" I asked, confusion still scrawled visibly on my face. Although, I did put my guard down a little since he didn't look suspicious enough to attack me.

"Ms. Liddell, you are a very special being. You believe magic exists, don't you?"

"I do, but I suppose admitting that would earn me another stay on Rutledge?"

"No Ms. Liddell. Haven't you received the letter?"

"Letter?" I asked in confusion, then it suddenly dawned on me that the letter he meant was the letter I received through an owl earlier. "I did. I haven't opened it yet though since I am supposed to be eating my breakfast."

"Ah, yes. Do forgive me for intruding early in the morning and for disturbing your breakfast."

I sighed and pulled the letter out of my pocket. I gave a wary glance to the strange bearded man, then hesitantly opened the letter and read it silently.

HOGWARTS SCHOOL OF WITCHCRAFT AND WIZARDRY

Dear Ms Liddell,

We are pleased to announce you that you have a place at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Please find enclosed a list of all necessary books and equipment.

Term begins on 1 September. We await your owl by no later than 31 July.

Yours Sincerely,

Headmaster Armando Dippet

I was speechless. Completely dumbfounded by the letter I have just read. What does this even mean?

"Ms. Liddell, you are a witch. Your innate magic for delving into Otherlands is a kind of magic that is ancient and lost. We believe your schooling in Hogwarts will hone you into a hero." The man let out a mischievous grin, his eyes glinting with mirth.

"Wh-What..? Me.. A witch?" Even I couldn't quite believe it myself. I knew what I am doing is something beyond the ordinary human capabilities, but I didn't expect it to be because I'm a witch. Also, this man knows about the Otherlands. "Then.. You are a wizard? Can you go to the Otherlands too?"

"Yes and no. Yes, I'm a wizard, but going to the Otherlands is something only you can do, Ms. Liddell."

"But.. Surely you must be mistaken. And you can't expect me to believe a stranger's words."

"True. I must demonstrate why I am a wizard then." The man stood up and pulled a peculiar looking stick out of his pocket, which I assume is a wand. I immediately took a step back, staring at him suspiciously. My eyes darted to the nearest object beside me, which was a broom that collected way too many dust and cobwebs.

Flicking the wand, the man said out loud. "Expecto Patronum."

With those words, light emanated from the tip of his wand and out came a silver bird. Bright and dazzling with wide wings, the bird flew over the house and around me. I gasped in amazement, my eyes widening not only in surprise but also awe. The silver bird felt warm, happiness seeping into me as its head nuzzled into my disheveled hair. The silver bird flew away and disappeared, and although I ought to feel disappointed of its leaving, I felt strangely better. The warmth that I felt from the bird still lingered.

"That was my patronus, a phoenix." The man chuckled, tucking its wand back in his belt. "The spell I casted is called a patronus spell. You cast it through thinking a cherished happy memory. You'll learn casting one once you attend school."

"This is not one of my hallucinations?" I stared at the man intently, daring him to suddenly disappear from my sight. I pinched myself too, and I felt the pain. I am not dreaming, and this hallucination is too vivid for it to be one.

"No. I am a wizard, and you Alice, are a witch." The man addressed me using my first name, and it oddly felt much more real. I sighed and looked down at the floor, still expecting it to suddenly crack and I would find myself falling into a hole once more.

"I know it isn't easy to take in Ms. Liddell, but I am sure stranger things have happened in your wonderland."

"Yes, but they all happened inside my mind. This.. This happened in reality.. But then again, I do not have a clear definition of reality." I ran a hand through my hair, a habit I have grown fond of since my hair was shaved clean on the asylum and my arms were restricted by the straitjacket.

I looked up at the man once more. He didn't really looked like the wizards she saw in her books, but he has a wand and performed a spell that felt so warm and real. Though he didn't look like the kind of wizard she expected, he seemed wise and capable, especially with the way he brought himself. I feel the power and confidence he exuberates yet his gaze felt kind, nodding at me understandingly. I must admit. My curiosity has not failed to itch me and I will allow it to have its way once more. I will pay the price later, for now, I must satiate my inquisitiveness.

"Say, mister.. I do believe that it is quite rude of you to have not introduced yourself." The ends of my lips twitched and I wasn't able to stop myself as a full smile painted my lips. It was indeed a bizarre situation, for often it was I who was called rude by people whose mind I have entered. I usually did not bother introducing myself, but my how the tables have turned.

The wizard let out a tinkling laugh, his eyes never seems to stop twinkling in amusement. "Do forgive me for my rudeness. I am Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore, a transfiguration professor in Hogwarts. It is of my utmost honor to have finally meet you, Alice." He smiled widely, offering his hand.

"It is a pleasure meeting you too, Mr. Dumbledore. Or should I say professor?" I took his hand and shook it.

"I take that as an answer of you accepting your admittance to Hogwarts. Now, would you rather finish your breakfast now or would you rather go on a shopping spree for your school supplies first?" I was about to say shopping spree, but much to my displeasure and embarrassment, my stomach growled loudly. Dumbledore chuckled and stood up. "I suppose shopping could be quite draining and eating to gain energy is definitely a must."

I sat back down and ate my meal quietly, finishing it as quick as I could. Dumbledore performed another spell and filled my mug with water. I thanked him and drank it as soon as I finished eating. Lucky me, Dumbledore helped with cleaning my dishes and putting the fire out with just a couple of latin-sounding words and a flick of his wand. If being a witch meant being able to do those, then I would gladly go to Hogwarts.

"Shall we, Ms. Liddell?" Dumbledore offered his left arm.

"Shall we what, professor?" I asked, looking at the arm and Dumbledore questioningly as I reluctantly accepted it.

"I am going to apparate to Diagon Alley, and you will be apparated with me." He pulled me gently to his side and locked my arm with his. "We are going to do a Side-Along Apparition spell. I must warn you that side-along apparition can be very uncomfortable, especially for the first timers, so do prepare yourself."

I gulped and nodded. He had said it with such a comforting tone that I can't help myself ease despite the little anxiety I felt over the warning. I closed my eyes and gripped his arm tightly as soon as I felt that the world disappeared before me and I felt my entire self be swallowed by a bright swirl.