I looked exasperatedly into the mirror propped against the dresser covered in knife marks. Looking exasperatedly back at me is a child, a young girl. She's rail-thin, draped in an atypical Team Skull outfit of battered cargo pants and a dark raincoat over a ratty tank top and Team Skull chain. Her dark brown hair rolls out of her oversized Skull Cap beanie in knots down her shoulders and over her face, obscuring a pair of crystalline hazel eyes. Only noticeable in small patches, under the layers of covering, lies the girl's true toasted orange-pink skin tone. Her hands carry a visage like pickled preservations of amputated appendages drained of blood, her bones so sharp in her figure they appear visible through the pockets of her enormous clothes. She is me.
"I'm not even sure I wanna do this, why am I here now?!", I asked the irritating Poison-Type specialist about to mess with my hair. "You got the supplies, I'm gonna use 'em. Eva said you wanted blonde and pale green?", Fade asked. "No I don't want fucking blonde and green, Fade!", I shouted at the grunt with the stupid nickname. He trudged on, unphased. "What do you want then? Actually you know what honey let's just get you washed and see where it takes us."
"See where it takes us!? Don't play around with my hair!", I whined. "It's a joke, please. Gladion could take it on the chin but you… ugh!", he chastised. "Don't compare me to Gladion.", I grumped. He chuckled and began dressing my hair, breaking out a spray bottle, scissors, and a brush that made my head ache every time he used it. I would swear it was a held item for Psychic-Types. I fiddled uncomfortably in the chair, receiving pokes to the neck when it disrupted Fade. With nothing else to do, I let out what was on my mind.
"Why aren't I training right now?", I asked dejectedly to no one in particular. "That's a good question, backyard's right there and it's a screen door; You could be having your team train right now.", he cooed in a fake somber voice. I groaned as I released my teammates for training, Zubat and Spinarak. "Absorb and Hypnosis practice guys. Toma, you catch Kawami in a web if she goes too far okay?", I coordinated. Both nodded and Toma slid open the door for them to train.
The washing passed without much fuss as I watched my friends' arms race between Kawami's developing move, Hypnosis and Toma's developing ability, Insomnia. Then, Fade's Bellsprout spat in my hair. "WHAT THE FUCK!?", I shouted. "Hair bleach is what.", Fade quipped. "I thought... But I...", I stammered. The twit just shrugged with a stupid grin on his face. Seeing as the deed was already done, I slouched down as the bleach seared my skin ever so delicately. Even with all my frustrations, when the jackass put the colors in, I couldn't complain.
Again looking in the mirror, now the orange-pink tone stands on display. Matching it in locks down my face, contrasting stands of dark magenta catch the light of my bubbling eyes. Poofing out behind me, framing it all, is a puffy cyan mop. I didn't know my hair looked like this.
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Gladion hung in limbo in the room Guzma had given him, a controlled splay of his now short blonde hair covering one eye in teen angst. The grunts were nice, the clothes were new, Null and him were doing well. Still, he marinaded. A voice came from the door, clearly not facing the door, "I heard your plan ya know?" He jumped up and swung the door open, Evander falling backwards onto him. The two fell together instead, Gladion onto his rear and Evander onto his arm.
"What!?", Gladion asked incredulously. "Sorry for falling on ya.", was all the grunt said. "Well..?", Gladion said, imploring him to continue as they got up and dusted themselves off. "It's my deal with big bro. I get to spy as long as I'm the only one who gets to spy. I said no at first, but you know Team Skull."
"No, I kind of don't.", Gladion said, giving his answer to the rhetorical question. "Damn, yeah I guess you don't.", Evander said. A breathless silence spread out between them, as they both drank in the social missteps they'd brought into this interaction. "Let me start again. Hi, I'm Evander, Team Skull's resident Ghost-Type specialist and security guy. I wanna talk to you about what you discussed with big bro Guzma.", Evander said, resetting the conversation.
"What do you want to know?", Gladion asked cautiously. "Your mom. Her arrest's all over the news, kinda hard to miss.", Evander replied. "What about her?", Gladion asked again, defensive. "You're not the only one on their backup family.", Evander explained half somber, half aggressive. Gladion snapped, "What's that supposed to mean?! Team Skull are in the same position as me, but you aren't my family." "Team Skull is a family for everyone in Alola who needs one, you included. So let me ask you something, as family. Are you doin' okay?"
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"WHY AM I AT THIS PARTY AGAIN?", I shouted into Will's ear. "CAUSE YOU HAVE TO GIVE A SHIT ABOUT SOMEONE OTHER THAN YOUR OWN POKÉMON DICKHEAD!", Will supplied back helpfully. I flicked their neck. "Come on Kau'i, training isn't all there is to life. You being Arceus's gift to trainers won't go away if you take a day off.", Eva somehow whispered distinctly in the cacophonic room. "I'LL JUST ASSUME THAT WAS A GOOD ONE. THANKS EVA!", Will added.
Suddenly, the music quieted just enough for our host to shout over the crowd. Rich loomed on top of the DJ equipment, Howie on his shoulders, and bellowed, "LET'S HEAR IT FOR HOWIE FOR EVOLVING!!!" The room erupted in cheers as the newly evolved Hypno spun his pendulum around experimentally. Will shoved a bottle with a Jynx on the label into my hand, "JYNX, YA GOTTA DRINK IT!" I rolled my eyes and began to sip on the Jynx's Trick Juice, grepa berry flavored.
The night wound on as the gathered grunts danced, talked, and dared eachother to do increasingly stupid things. It was a small turn out with all the work to be done, but we partied on anyway. Toma entertained a few drunks on a couch with his impressive web creation skills, something we had practiced extensively. He shot threads from his mouth as he laid them in parallel with his spinnerette, conjuring dazzling patterns. Will mingled with the many guests who could make it, which regrettably wasn't everyone that had wanted to, weaving an ornate social web to rival Toma's. Eva lingered at the bar, slipping gruesome lingual jabs onto unsuspecting drink runners.
Kawami flew around the party, using Hypnosis on anyone before they could get into a fistfight, which was normally Howie's responsibility. Howie leaned back against the fence with me and Rich. With his evolution, Howie was now just above my height and we both were a considerable size in comparison to Rich. "My mouth dry, I'm gettin' a drink.", I complained to Rich as I began to meander back into the kitchen. "It's the alcohol Kau, it'll just get drier.", Rich said back. "Ima Poison bitch, I'll be fine!", I rebuked. Rich didn't bother to respond.
I made my way into the bustling kitchen, narrowly avoiding running into a grunt standing at the end of the island countertop, and pulled another grepa Jynx Juice from the cooler. I wrestled my small hands against the twist top cap of the drink, briefly stumbling and bouncing off the leg of a passing guest, before sloppily releasing the drink from its shackles. As I lifted the drink to my lips, the scent struck my nose and my body rejected my addled mind's premise.
Eva whisked me out of the pool of pale vomit, ignoring our decreasing size difference and setting me on her lap. "I keep telling you, we are a bad influence; Only a special type of gang gets 8 year olds wasted after all.", she whispered chidingly into my ear.
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"It's not like fucking Team Aqua's plan or Team Rocket's plan! It's for the public good! No one gets screwed but the League!", Gladion shouted through the heaving breaths. "Don't yell so much, you need air dude.", Evander lectured. He slowed to take a breath as Evander stopped to be at his side. The gremlin in Evander's backpack reached a protein bar out between its claws over his shoulder. "Thanks Sableye."
"This trail sucks.", Gladion noted as he chewed. "It's beautiful!", Evander defended. "Not what I said.", came the reply. "Exercise is important for being a good trainer! Ya needa be a proper admin before the plan goes off right? Good thing Null has enough motivation for both of you.", Evander said. "The trail still sucks.", Gladion said as they finally crested the mountain.
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Gladion collapsed into a bench in the small lookout area, Type: Null, who he had nicknamed just Null, lounging across his lap in spite of their size. "The League has it coming!", he spat. "Back to this I see.", Evander noted. "What else is there!? They screwed me, they screwed Team Skull, they're readying up to screw everyone with their stupid Gyms!", he heaved. Evander sat down next to him, trying to calm him down.
"They're power hungry jerks! They sent my mother to a nuthouse for funding the Team! They deserve a taste of their own medicine, what it's like without a safety net…", Gladion rambled with mania in his eyes. He was furious, and Evander just wanted him to calm down. Looking at the other boy passionately plotting against an entire government, conviction and hateful caring in every word, Evander shut Gladion up the only way he could think of in that moment.
Evander kissed him.
Evander's eyes opened from the daze of the kiss to see Gladion's own shocked expression. He pulled back. "Uhhh…", they both said, unsure of what to say. Then, "Sorry!', again from both. They turned away from eachother. Null looked up from Gladion's lap at his flushed red face. Sableye snickered in Evander's backpack.
"I… didn't think I… I mean, I didn't know that I liked… boys.", Gladion awkwardly lilted. Evander turned and paused, making sure he had heard him right. "Does that mean you..?", Evander nearly whispered. Both turned even redder at the realized implication while Sableye and Rotom giggled.
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Heahea was so full of tourists I almost couldn't stand it, but when it came to stealing they came with one upside, easy marks. Even for a city they were abundant. With the tournament in Heahea today, plenty of people were bringing out their Z-Crystal collections. We were being tasked with stealing as many Z-Crystals as possible, preferably from ace trainers and other bothersome people.
Guzma already had a monopoly on Buginium Z, forcing trial-goers who wanted a full set to face him, but these were for Team Skull's "plan". Just thinking about the nebulus "plan" to get back at the Pokémon League sent giddy tingles up my spine. Big bro had made it clear the League was why he'd lost funding, meaning they were why I had to spend so much of my time stealing instead of training or hanging out with my friends.
My mind focused again, spotting exactly what I was looking for. 'Bingo, ace trainer with a Z-Crystal case!' I waltzed down the sidewalk, Kawami faithfully hovering at my shoulder as bystanders avoided me. Even if I was child, average people knew to avoid Team Skull grunts. I got behind the ace trainer, and in one whip-like motion grabbed at the crystal case. It didn't budge.
Fluidly, the ace trainer whirled on me as I stood dumbfounded. A Bruxish released itself from its lure ball at their hip, crushing Kawami with a Psychic Fang in a snap. The red light that had been my Zubat trailed after me as I bolted away from the failed mark. They followed after me as I wriggled my way deeper into the crowd. In my dash to safety I made it closer and closer to the tournament venue before slapping head first into a cop working guard duty for the event. "Shit!", I shouted before changing direction again to avoid both of the people now chasing me.
Frantically, I sprinted down the streets and alleyways trying to lose my tails. The ace trainer and the cop seem to be getting along swimmingly, to my dismay. Left! Left! Right! Left! Right! I desperately dived through the labyrinthine city. 'I need a distraction!', I thought. I whisked a brick from a pile of construction materials and followed my street rat instincts to the other half of the bricks destined pair. Right when they rounded the corner, I threw the brick into the windshield of the police cruiser.
I only had a moment of distraction to get away. Nearly slamming into the corner of the building, I took in my options. An alleyway, no accessible rooftops, a sewer grate. 'Motherfucker!', I thought, desperately wishing I could scream the words but knowing I couldn't. I had no time to waver before I flipped the grate open and slid down into the darkness.
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"WOOOOHOO!! YEEAAAAH!", Dylan, a member of Gladion's ever growing circle of grunts dedicated to Team Skull's revenge, shrieked from the back seat. Gladion was blitzing a sports car across a racing course the grunts had set up through Po Town. Evander clutched the door's armrest and the center console as Gladion whipped the car around a corner marked with artful graffiti that was both an arrow and the Pokémon League headquarters on Mount Lanakila in flames.
"ARE YOU SURE YOU CAN DO THIS?!", Evander screamed over the wind. "ABSOLUTELY NOT!", Gladion said. He really was beginning to like being in Team Skull. He skirted around a series of criss cross turns before sliding to a stop in front of the spray painted starting line. Gladion let out a whoop as a crowd gathered. Evander sighed, then leaned across and kissed Gladion.
"Get a room!", Dylan mocked. Gladion just gave him a glare. Null emerged from the crowd, jumping over the door of the open-topped car and into Gladion's lap. Evander whined, "Null! I like those pants, don't tear them!" "Those are your pants?", Dylan asked. The crowd went quiet while Dylan received a double serving of death glares.
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"Scary Face! Confuse Ray", I ordered. Plumeria was engaging me in yet another practice battle to push my pokémon's limits, two of mine against one of hers. Her Salazzle whipped into action, sending out a Fire Lash that was batted away with an Air Cutter from Zubat. My pokémon moved in, the Scary Face on Spinarak's back slowing the salamander for the Confuse Ray in Kawami's eyes to take hold.
Plumeria barked from the sidelines, "You'll win, Poison Gas!" It was not directed at me and mine. Salazzle absent-mindedly breathed out a miasmic cloud of Poison Gas, catching Kawami and Toma and causing them to break out in red pock marks. Salazzle's ability, Corrosion, let her poison Poison and Steel-Types that would normally be immune.
"Infestation and Wing Attack guys!", I called. Toma spat out an Infestation of tiny web construct spiders that stuck to Salazzle while Kawami struck it from behind. "Scale Shot!", came Plumeria's voice. Salazzle slashed her tails out, sending a sharp hail of scales at the two of them. Two struck each of Toma and Kawami, causing Toma to faint while Kawami was left on her last wings.
"Hypnosis and Wing Attack! Give it your all!", I screamed to Kawami. She grinned like a maniac and flew straight at Salazzle. The slender thing tried to retreat, but fell right in place for Hypnosis to reach her. Slazzle slumped inelegantly to the ground and Kawami took every opportunity she could. She dragged her wing in a spiral along the lizard in one continuous Wing Attack for several full seconds before the enemy finally stirred.
The Salazzle unfurled from the floor, blearily rocketing scales into the back of her own head. She stumbled forward into another Wing Attack. "End this.", Plumeria commanded not just Salazzle but seemingly the whole field. Salazzle broke out of her confusion, rocketing her fist toward Kawami for a Poison Jab. Unprompted, Kawami flew into the attack, glowing bright white. Golbat Bit down on Salazzle's outstretched arm.
Salazzle flinched, and that was all it took. Kawami's Wing Attack struck with both wings as she stood on Salazzle's arm with her newly usable feet. With just one more bite from Toma's Infestation of spiders, Salazzle collapsed. "I didn't think that would happen. You're ready Kau'i, congrats!", Plumeria said appreciatively as she returned her partner. I cheered.
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"Babe stay…", Gladion groaned from the couch. "Security, can't help it.", Evander replied. The admin waved a finger at his boyfriend, "Tackle." Null jumped gracefully onto the security expert, comfortably keeping him in place."Come on honey, the newbies are shit at the job you know that! The passwords are almost a month old! I need to go in even if it isn't strictly necessary." Gladion laid himself on the floor next to him, only Null's legs separating them.
"I need you. This plan is everything and if you're not there with me… I can't think straight.", Gladion implored him. "Course you can't, gayass.", Evander snarked. Gladion kissed him. "Alright. I'll hear you out.", he conceded. Getting up and dusting themselves off, Null kicked the door closed again. They sat facing eachother on the worn couch.
"So for the teams, I'm not sure where each group should go. Big bro Guzma should stay here and take care of Tapu Bulu so he can get back to Po Town if we're figured out, right? But the rest of it's a mess… Akala and Tapu Lele are gonna be tough no matter what, Poni's Tapu Fini is active but has less protection, and Tapu Koko on Melemele is gonna be so well guarded I don't know if it's even worth trying. We have no third admin, so there's no way we can get all of them!"
"Hm. So two groups will be led by an admin, one by big bro, and one will be left without a leader? Why not just ignore one?", Evander asked. "No… we can't do that! If any island's defenses aren't occupied, they might help another island. Even if we don't succeed on one island, we still need to attack there!", he said hurriedly. "Calm down.", Evander tried. "NO! This isn't something to be calm about! This is what we've been working for for 3 years! I can't fuck this up!", Gladion screamed.
"Agh! Gladion! Get your head out of the clouds! Do you need me for every decision on this?! I have important things to do, you have an entire entourage to ping these off of, why me!?", Evander screamed in kind. Gladion stood stock still. "You're… because… because I…", he stammered with fear vandalizing his face. "Put me on the fourth group. I'll take the fall for Melemele. I'm going to work, Gladion.", Evander spat with spite cursing his words.