Amaryllis stared at the white ceiling. Her brain hurt as if she had drunk bleach that had rushed into her brain, frying the noodles inside. Her eyes welled with tears, but she tried to hold them back and succeeded; perhaps it was an art she was far too adept at, and she appreciated it as much.
“Where am I?” she wondered, her voice was hoarse and dry. She tried to move, but her body protested. A wave of pain embraced her like she hugged a cactus made of magma. She forced herself up anyway. Both her hands were encased, plastered, by something concrete, and her whole body was wrapped in bandages. Hundreds of wires poked her body in different places, but most of it was on her heart like it was the core of a spiraling knot.
The hospital ward, Amaryllis concluded, as she finally took in the desk overflowing with files and the empty chair where Light should be sitting. But she was not here.
Amaryllis forced her mind to remember the events that happened before passing out. “Did we make it out alive?” she asked first, a silly question. Of course, they did. Or else why would she be here?
“What about Blackfrost?” Amaryllis mumbled. She saw her skin — the one that wasn’t obsidian crystal, in the gap between her plasters and dressings.
Her throat tightened. Was it a dream? It had to be. There was no cure for it. There couldn’t be one, not with this many families suffering from this tragedy. No matter the status, everyone met the same fate — be it her city’s mayor’s son or her sister. She had never heard of anyone healing.
Her fist clenched. She hypothesized if there was one just hidden by the Soul Hunt. Something boiled in her heart. Her breath hitched. Her skin lit like alighted after being dipped in gasoline. “Aaah…” she groaned. Her heart hammered lethargically — each beat hurt like thousands of needles stabbing. She tried to curl up, sinking into the bed, gasping for breath. She heard the sirens from the machine connected to her through the wires.
Her heart had returned to normal by the time the cabin’s door opened, and Light hurried to her side. She looked exhausted like a withering flower, her eyes sunken. “Amaryllis,” she hushed, slowly massaging her back. “Calm down,” she said. Her warm voice had that effect on itself.
Amaryllis took a minute to return to normal. Light adjusted her on the bed. “T-thank you,” Amaryllis barely managed to mumble. There was still a stabbing pain with each breath, but she could handle herself fine.
“Amaryllis, countdown from ten.” Light asked in a much more rigid tone, her lips pressed in a thin line.
Amaryllis nodded.“Ten, nine, eight, seven, six, five, four, three, two, one…”
A warm light enveloped her. It soothed her punctured heart. She swam in a dreamy haze, feeling a comfort she hadn’t for years past or, perhaps, ever. Her eyelid grew heavy, and she drifted into another sleep, fortunately, one without any nightmares.
…
Amaryllis blinked. She thought of nothing. Her eyes solely focused on the white light in the ceiling. It made her eyes tear up; at least, that was the justification she had if someone asked why she was sobbing like a child.
She didn’t know what made her cry. Her mind, memories, everything was in chaos — swirling over the horizon of the abyss in the form of a string of light, fragmented and broken. The darkness swallowed the ones that her mind subconsciously deemed unnecessary to be remembered again, chopping her whole self into pieces, crafting her into something she wasn’t.
Her mind again drifted to Blackfrost. She reeled it onto something else, combing through the hazy past to search for a memory or past that would busy her with something unrelated. Yet, every pleasant memory of hers started with her sister, and all those memories dropped her back to only one destination — Blackfrost.
Her fist clenched hard. Once she woke up from the pleasant sleep, she found herself strapped onto the bed. Her hands were healed as if nothing happened to them, just sore from exercise. Almost all her physical trauma was fixed.
Perhaps Light feared she might do something stupid if left untied, and she was not wrong by a mile.
Amaryllis didn’t know what she might do if she were untied and unobserved right now. The rational part of her wasn’t functioning as it should. A part of her wanted nothing more than to jump out of the window and end it all.
Her body was completely normal and had already proved they had a way to heal Blackfrost, but they didn’t. Her sister had no hope of ever finding peace. All her hopes and suffering had been in vain.
She let out a breath. If I continue to climb up the rank, I will eventually get access to the healing, she whispered to herself. She didn’t believe that would happen. She was already on the verge of death after the first assessment, and here she was, telling herself to complete the next assessment and rise in the ranks of the Soul Hunter.
The door opened quietly, and Light walked in. She didn’t look exhausted anymore, back to a healthy body except for the dark bags under her eyes. “Amaryllis,” she looked at her. The straps tying her vanished with a snap of her finger. “Can you sit?”
Amaryllis nodded, pushing herself to a sitting position, and dropped her legs off the edge. Her bare feet felt the cold floor under it. The soft white marble didn’t turn black as it should. “I can,” she replied, looking at Light as she took the empty seat, not sliding closer to her. Her hunter instinct might’ve told her what would happen if she dared get close to her.
“Can you remember anything?” Light asked. “If you cannot, that is fine.”
“It is not!” Amaryllis screamed. She felt the rage boil up again, clutching her heart, sinking its claws painfully. “It’s not. What happened to Blackfrost? Why am I normal?!”
She tried to keep her emotions in check, to behave, yet it all proved too difficult. Tears welled up in her eyes. She hated that Light was still pretending to be kind and caring while hiding something every part of the world desired. A medicine as sought after as an immortality elixir and yet as much a myth.
Light looked at her, unperturbed by her outburst. “Amaryllis… You can ask it without screaming,” Light said calmly, “This anger will only hurt you in this place. And you’ve already experienced it. How different this place is from what you thought?”
Light’s words only made her anger flare like her entire mind was burning in real flames, even the breath she let out burned her nose. But she forced herself to understand what Light meant and how, even though cruel, Light’s words were solely for her own good. “Sorry…”
“If we had the luxury, I would never ask you to bottle up your frustration. You need help, a lot more than you are allowed, and perhaps help that a Soul Hunter will never get. But you’re on a clock even now. There’s about half an hour before you enter the Hall of Forge. Before that, I need to ascertain if your mind is functioning adequately to withstand the anvil,” Light paused. Her voice was slow and calm, unhurried for how much she emphasized they were on the clock.
Amaryllis nodded. She didn’t believe half an hour was enough to get her anywhere unless there was a mind-control spell.
“Of course, we should begin with Blackfrost, as is necessary,” Light created a frost icicle in the air, spinning gently, “This is the inversion of frost or blackfrost, but we will call it whitefrost for the sake of simplicity.”
“I saw an inversion of frost somewhere, but I cannot remember it anymore,” Amaryllis replied, chaining down all her emotions; they were unnecessary, a hurdle to otherwise peaceful conversation.
“That is perfectly fine,” Light pulled up the sleeve of her doctor’s coat, showing off her gracile arm twined with lotus-like flowers, vines, and leaves, all white, that covered the entirety of her arm. It was breathtaking and terrifying — the tiny runes etched on the arms to form the painting — and enthralling. Whispering Amryllis to get close, and she’d learn something about mana she had never known. Nonetheless, her body remained frozen in awe and fright.
“This is a seal. To contain Blackfrost, pull up your sleeve,” Light said after a long pause, waiting for Amaryllis to get over her shock.
Amaryllis pulled up her sleeve and witnessed a similar rune and painting on her arm, but unlike Light’s, hers was black with golden flowers. The loose sleeve easily slid to her shoulder, but the vines never stopped. She let go of it and pulled her front, looking at her chest. All the vines had coiled and sunk where her heart should be.
Now that she was aware of it, she could feel the mana sink out of it at an alarming rate and refilled to the brim as quickly by the needle puncturing her shoulder, connected to the red liquid hanging over her head.
“That’s a Frost Seal. It can seal the Blackfrost—”
“Then why won’t you do it for everyone?” Amaryllis cut in sharply, her eyes leaving the vines and refocusing on Light. She breathed once more and told herself to calm down.
“I will get to that if you allow me to explain,” Light replied patiently. “Those vines are Blackfrost, but instead of the entirety of your body, I gave them only a certain path to converge and expand in. You will ask how can we seal it when Blackfrost is uncontrollable. The answer is simple — the entire divinity of Old gods has been sealed by the Soul Hunters, crafting a spell that can seal Blackfrost, while is an achievement, is not impossible.”
“Then…” Her words died in her throat as Light looked at her. She still was as patient, with no hint of annoyance. But Amaryllis got the hint. Her leg still tapped the floor impatiently. She just wanted to know if they could do it for her sister and why she had never heard of it.
“But there are trade-offs and conditions that make it wholly impossible to do it for normal humans. First, the only way for the sealing to work is that you need to be afflicted with inversion of frost, and not Blackfrost, because Blackfrost by itself will devour, decay, and destroy any spell. But, you managed to stop the decay effect from affecting the shawl.”
Amaryllis nodded. I did that? She wondered why she couldn’t remember that.
“During the state of inversion, its effect can be tempered down. Simply speaking, you can turn off the decay effect, and at that juncture, sealing magic will work. Are you following me?”
Amaryllis nodded. She didn’t know if she was honestly following. Inversion made no sense to her, a jargon thrown at her face without any explanation, but she decided not to interrupt her.
“I should explain the inversion of Frost first. For reasons only known only to Stella Blackfrost, when a spirit casts a spell on someone after Blackfrost blooms but before the blooming sequence finishes, the Blackfrost inverses for a brief moment, turning into a white-colored frost that can be controlled. Of course, it’s still not easy, and by the time you figure out how to control it, the inversion effect is over, and you are back to being Blackfrost. A very situational and impossible condition to fulfill. After all, one cannot tame a spirit, so the inversion will only take effect if a spirit likes you enough and does something for you last time before you turn into… well, a patient. Do you get what I mean?”
Amaryllis nodded. There was no way for it to work for her sister. Her hands tightened, clenching the blanket. Knowing there was a cure would’ve assured her more. She’d have a chance to one day heal her sister, but not anymore. She shouldn’t have hoped in the first place. Why me? It should’ve been Cynthia.
“And you happen to fulfill a very situational condition. You can say fate has not yet abandoned you truly, even if it does hate you, if I say so myself,” Light chuckled. Amaryllis didn’t. She couldn’t see any humor in it. Light didn’t humor herself.
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“Is that it…? I awakened Blackfrost and lost it in a single day. It couldn’t be that simple, It shouldn’t be that simple,” Amaryllis pressed
“Of course, it isn’t. You’re not free from the Blackfrost. As you can see, mine is white, while yours is black. The first thing you need to do is turn it white, or you’ll die of exhaustion.”
“Because it's absorbing my mana at an alarming rate?” Amaryllis tilted her head.
“As long as Blackfrost is sealed within you, it will feed off your Sinner’s Pulse, consuming mana every moment it's sealed within you. You can consider it a second condition: the frost seal consumes mana at a rate that would mentally exhaust a normal human, but like me, you’ve nerves that can withstand the toll of constant mana channeling. Adding on that, constant mana channeling is something that would mentally exhaust even a veteran Soul Hunter. Even they cannot handle something so bizarre. A normal person, even if saved by fate, will be in constant pain, headache, fever, and numerous bizarre states of mind — hallucination, drunken mumbling, paranoia, etc, etc. You get the point. Everyone gives up. They take their own life even if the seal is placed upon them. The seal is a curse unless you’re a very certain type of human. Almost… like you need to be created and raised to handle the seal,” The last line barely reached her ears.
Amaryllis didn’t say anything as Light stared at a file she had picked up sometime during her explanation. Amaryllis felt a little more relaxed and lightened. There was still no solution to Blackfrost. She couldn’t tell if she wanted there to be one or not.
“You are used to handling constant flow mana through your body,” Light asked after finally regaining her focus.
Amaryllis’s whole body tensed.
“Don’t worry, I am not asking why,” Light said, looking into her eyes. She understood something, “But, if you wish to tell me why, I’d be happy to hear.”
Amaryllis shook her head. “I don’t know.” She replied in a panic.
“Then… we proceed. The rate at which the Blackfrost siphons mana from your heart, and you passively absorb it from the atmosphere is different. I have added an external source of mana to make sure that seal doesn’t suck your Sinner’s Pulse dry and you die.”
“Sinner’s pulse… I exhausted it during my battle with the Puppeteer… why am I alive?” Amaryllis asked.
A human blessed by mana meets their end if they exhaust all their mana at once. Always a sliver of mana should remain in their heart, mana core, or as the masses call it, Sinner’s pulse.
There’s a small crystal bone, the size of a nail, in the heart of mana-blessed individuals, formally called Sinner’s Pulse. It’s a real hard bone and not an illusory concept. It glows and absorbs mana from the air, supplying mana to all body parts, which require mana to function properly, as they have evolved from their original functions after coming in contact with mana. The mana-blessed are mutants of sorts but not necessarily superior, at least according to Amaryllis.
Sinner’s Pulse requires a certain amount of mana to sustain itself, much like how the heart requires blood supply. Why Sinner’s Pulse, you might ask? That’s a story for another time.
If Sinner’s Pulse loses hold of mana, the result would be the same as losing all of the blood from the body. It starts to break.
But unlike blood, it’s not as immediately required to live. Neither the death due to it is painful. The body grows cold and sluggish, thoughts muddle, and humans fall into slumber, from which one never wakes up. This death also has a name: Sinner’s Death. Very creative, isn’t it?
Of course, death is not instantaneous. There’s a window frame during which one must be infused with another source of mana with one expensive surgery to survive.
Amaryllis had used up all the mana during her fight with the puppeteer. And concluded she was going to die.
“Exhaustion of your Sinner’s pulse led to the awakening of Blackfrost seed… I suppose you’re unaware of how Blackfrost spreads,” Light sighed. “I would rather tell you this after the assessment, but… there’s no harm in knowing about it right now.”
Amaryllis nodded.
“Blackfrost seed is very common — one out of every ten mana blessed has it in their heart. It’s almost too common to put people under observation. It is accepted as the truth of the world. But, that’s not to say it's something that can be made public knowledge… you’re smart enough to guess what kind of world that would create.”
Amaryllis agreed. Just the knowledge that her sister was afflicted with blackfrost made her an outcast from society. Everyone wanted to keep their distance from her. She couldn’t imagine if they knew there was a chance she might have a seed of blackfrost. She’d be thrown out of every public or private place not exclusively for mana blessed.
If it turned out that one in ten people blessed with mana might have a chance to have it, the entire mana-blessed community would be thrown into a contamination ward. Compared to that, the current world almost lived in harmony. Almost, for the peace was still far from acceptable. Mana blessed had it worst of all. The ability wielder got the silver spoon in life. The mana-less people were the masses, so compared to them, mana-blessed were the ones squashed and discriminated against the most.
“The seed rarely, if ever awakens, though it can be triggered upon various situations. One of the fixed situations is always upon exhaustion of Sinner’s pulse or attempt at the extraction of Blackfrost Seed.” Light sighed, “When the seed blooms, it entraps the bearer into an unbloomed lotus, turning flesh into Blackfrost. Once that happens, we cannot change it. But the spirit interrupted you, and well, you were afflicted with Inversion of Frost, so your flesh never truly turned to blackfrost. And before the inversion of frost wore off, you were in my care and sealed it.”
“Why…?” Amaryllis asked. Another swirl of emotions rose in her heart, “Why did you help me? I saw you last time I was awake. you looked exhausted, was it because of me?” She didn’t know what to feel about it. Now that there was no rage, she felt guilty for behaving rudely with Light.
“Because I can. While that may seem a shallow reason, you’re an exceptionally rare person, not a fortunate one, but rare indeed. I’ve had hundreds of blackfrost patients, one or two inversions of frost, yet, no one was capable of handling the frost seal,” Light smiled at her, her eyes filled with guilt, “Perhaps seeing someone else who can handle the seal made me a little too excited, I never asked your permission to make this life-altering decision, I’m sorry. But you’re not in any condition to answer me.”
“Thanks… I am grateful,” Amaryllis replied, lowering her head. “I’m sorry for behaving rudely earlier.”
“You should thank Gisella, if she had failed to bring you out of the assessment zone quickly enough, you would’ve turned back into blackfrost, and then nothing I could have helped you.”
Amaryllis nodded. “Gisella… She brought me out, how?” A panic rushed into her heart. Did something happen to Gisella? Amaryllis had passed out, then certainly, there was no way Gisella could be unaffected by the Blackfrost.
“She has her ways. Not unharmed. You can meet her later. For now, we should focus on the explanation,” Light pondered for a moment, “Right explained about the blackfrost. On to the next part. Now that we have established you need to change the blackfrost seal to white, how do we do that? That will remain a mystery for now, I don’t want another burden on your mind as you enter the Hall of Forge. And you have no way to do it right now or even understand it. There’s something I must explain to conclude this part. You cannot break the seal under any circumstance. You don’t have the power to break it, but you have a familiar whose capacities are unknown to me, so I’ll warn you of this.”
“What happens if I break it?” Amaryllis asked. She knew she’d turn into a Blackfrost, but that was it. There must be something else, or Light being so cautious didn’t make sense.
“Second bloom. A seed of blackfrost, if sealed, can bloom a second time. The mana it absorbs from you is for this very reason. It’s like an angry child that wants nothing more than to show how it didn’t appreciate your doing, and in doing so, it would create a bigger lotus, as big as a football stadium, defiling everything in the surroundings, mutate the creatures around it into blackfrost afflicted. If you ever decide to pull off a self-sacrifice, you will always bring destruction. Blackfrost is not an ability. You will never use it to do good. Everything around you will be dead. You’ve been warned.”
Amaryllis nodded. She hoped she would never be in a situation where breaking the seal would be required again. “Can you seal it again?” Amaryllis asked, just in case.
Light gave her a sad smile as if guessing her mind, “Can it be sealed? If the situation is the same as the current one, of course, I can seal it, it will take an extra hour or two of effort, but sure, I can do it. But will it be sealed? No. Upon second bloom, you will be the most wanted human in the world. There’s no way to hide if you bloom a Blackfrost lotus as big as a stadium, which cannot melt, and it emits enough radiation to alarm a nationwide shutdown. I didn’t mention it, did I? The flower that blossoms from the bloom of Blackfrost cannot be destroyed, melted, or harmed by any magic. Meaning the proof always stays, glowing like a beacon of even. Now, if you have that understanding, you know what you must do. If death comes for you, accept it.”
“Why?” Amaryllis asked, gulping. She was not the one for a dramatic display, but even her mouth hung open at Light’s words.
“Because… the third bloom will be big enough to put your name on the list of the world’s most famous genocidal maniacs. We’ve only ever had one thrice bloom, since then once the second bloom happens, the nation, its friends, its enemies, and neighbors will send an assassin just for you, and you’ll be put on the most wanted list of almost every country in the world. There’s no survival after the second bloom. You will accept death if you ever find yourself in that situation, for you pose a greater risk to the world than anyone.”
“I will…” Amaryllis agreed. She couldn’t even imagine risking that many people just for her sake. It could never be worth it.
“That’s great to hear. Keep telling yourself that every night. Maybe you will have an easier time accepting the reality. I certainly did,” Light looked tired. She yawned.
“Did it help?”
“Nope.” Light chuckled, “But… it’s better than nothing.”
Amaryllis tried to smile along with her but failed.
“Back to the point, you understand everything, and I can trust you to keep it a secret from others. And by that extension… you’re forbidden from wearing clothing that would reveal the existence of the frost seal on your body and,” Light looked toward the door, shifting in her chair uncomfortably, “Or having a physical relationship with anyone, at least, unless you meet Stella Blackfrost. Only by her permission can you have a partner.”
“I understand…” Amaryllis whispered. She didn’t intend for either of them, anyway. Just the thought of dating made her stomach roll at the implications of what they did. She was not functional enough to have a relationship such as that. “Who’s Stella Blackfrost?” Amaryllis questioned. This was the second time Light mentioned that name.
“Well, she is one of seven Leaders of Soul Hunt. She said if you reach Rank 1 in Executioner’s ranking of Apprentice Hunter’s list, she will meet you. And you should consider that a goal. She is an important figure and most knowledgeable person in the world about Blackfrost. Even the name seal we wear is created by her.”
“I will try… But… what’s executioner’s ranking?” Amarylis’s lips twitched. The way Light said it, made her wonder if she should know about this beforehand.
“Right. You don’t know. No worries, Henneth will explain it to you after the soul forge,” Light dropped the file on the overflowing desk, which wobbled, making Amaryllis wonder if she’d need to help Light clean the mess, but nothing fell off, fortunately.
“That concluded most of our explanation with blackfrost for now. There’s much to learn, but it can wait,” Light looked at her again, shifting uncomfortably, “Is there anything else you wish to ask?”
Amaryllis focused on her mind. There was something. “Why were we thrown into a place like that?”
“Clownman and House Yriel have an agenda, and Gisella is Yriel’s heir, so you can guess what Clownman would do if he found a chance to send her to a certain death. But the plan has failed gloriously, and he’d answer much in the court for this behavior, though I am doubtful I’ll be able to hurt him much,” She smiled, slightly different from her usual calm persona and more like a hunter fitting of this place. “I will make him pay outside the court if the need arises. But Yriel should take care of him.”
That’s if he doesn’t have a backup plan. There’s no way he chose to do this if Yriel is so powerful unless he has a way to save himself.
Amaryllis didn’t voice her thoughts, she knew little of this place compared to Light to make conclusions, “What about those children?” she asked. She forced herself to calm down as a bubble of panic rose in her heart. She didn’t kill them
“They are fine, in the hospital. Since you took the initiative, I can arrange for you to meet them if you wish to.”
Amaryllis shook her head, “I’ll trust you… Light… Thank you. I never don’t know what else to say.”
“Light said nothing, letting her get lost in her own thoughts. Amaryllis, on the other hand, wanted to be busy with explanations of useless things to busy her mind and keep it away from her. If she were left alone, she didn’t know where she would wander off to.
How much time had passed? She wondered. How long before they would leave for soul forge? She felt no excitement about it, not anymore. The prospect of power felt like a dim buzz lost in a corner of her mind. She felt tired once more.
“Amaryllis. About Mire?”
Amaryllis tilted her head, “Who’s Mire?” she asked in genuine confusion. The name rang no bell in her memories.
Light looked at her, a little shaken by her words. And she kept staring that way for far too long for Amaryllis to feel comfortable. Amaryllis rubbed her hand, waiting in anticipation.
“Amaryllis.” Light’s voice was taut with attention. “It’s easy, isn’t it?” She gave her a pained smile, “To just lock away everything confusing and painful?”
Amaryllis narrowed her eyes. She didn’t like the implication of Light’s words. She remembered everything as clear as day. There was no one named Mire in the assessment. She had sharp memory to forget a person. “I don’t understand what you mean, Light.”
“Of course, you don’t. Of course.” Light rose from her seat and approached her on the bed. She picked up something that Amaryllis couldn’t see and wrapped it around her body.
Amaryllis’s senses soared. She felt the mana unlike she ever remembered. It was familiar, but she couldn’t tell why. She should remember it, but why? What had happened? Her body tensed as she turned to Light. Her instinct was to run away. “I don’t understand,” she said, her voice on the verge of tears, quivering like a child lost in the darkness.
“We’ll talk again, after the soul forge… That would be for the best,” Light said, gently patting her head.
Amaryllis nodded, but she didn’t want to talk. Neither did she want this cloth on her body, yet she couldn’t bring herself to ask Light to remove it from her shoulder. It was warm, yet cold. What’s happening?