I looked out over the sea, watching the dark clouds moving in. With the passing of Ice-breaking Day, the warmer weather was coming in, but that meant that the storm season was here, when the warm winds from the east tore over the frozen waters with as much fury as a dragon tearing itself free from the caves where it lived like a volcano eruption. A wind hit my face, causing a few hairs to free themselves from the knot at the nape of my neck.
Mother, Father, and Grandmother stood behind me, as silent as I was. My heart beat a wild rhythm in my chest, the anxiety swelling to its climax inside me. I had been accepted by Lord Ashiro-han earlier that morning, and now, that afternoon, I stood waiting for his longboat to come take me to his island.
Four Nageeya stood on the pier with me; one of them, the tallest, looked over her shoulder at me, giving me full view of her slender neck. She had the blackest eyes I had ever seen on a woman, and they seemed to mock me as they went up and down my short form, seeming to say what an unsightly creature I was.
I wore my finest robe of silver; one I had been aiming to sell once I ran away. The dark grey birds embroidered along every hem glistened every time I moved, seeming to flutter over the fine silk. It was a fitting robe to wear in the winter on such a dark day, and I hoped my appearance would give me ground to tread on. No one would want a sloppily dressed woman to present herself as a future bride, and though Hotaki had said that Lord Ashiro-han was not concerned with beauty, outward appearance was something entirely different.
I could see the longboat coming around the curve of the cove. The tall, bare cliffs that lined the cove posed as little threat to the longboat. The boat seemed to glide right over the uneven water, without use of oars. The boat had a few tall sails, but it was nowhere near as huge as the junks that came in and out of the cove for trading purposes. I wondered if the boat had some sort of blessing on it to make it sail smoothly. Some merchants would have a priest bless their ships to keep them from ever sinking. It would make sense for the boats belonging to the lord to be blessed as such.
The longboat was growing closer. I turned to Mother and Father, knowing my time was coming.
"Goodbye," was all I could say. I didn't think I was going to cry—I felt just emptiness—but I couldn't get any other words out.
Father and Grandmother pulled me into a tight embrace. I let myself bask in their warmth, bury my face in Father's chest, wrap my arms around them both. It might have been the last I would see of them for a long time.
Mother offered no such comforting action. She simply touched my face briefly.
"You will make us proud." It wasn't a statement, it was a demand. I knew that if I failed the tests, I would have failed my family, and there was no telling what Mother would do to me if I returned.
I had no bags to take with me. Lord Ashiro-han's letter had only stated that his house would provide me with everything. I only wore the clothes on my back. Should I pass the tests and become his wife, my family would bring all my possessions for me.
I turned to the longboat, which had pulled up to the pier. Men in armor—soldiers—stepped forward and pushed out a folding ramp from the boat onto the pier. All the soldiers wore snarling bronze masks, much like the servants who had accompanied Hotaki to my father's house. Hotaki himself stood at the top of the ramp, next to him standing a woman who looked to be my mother's age. They said nothing to the people on the pier. Hotaki had his fan, and he snapped it open, holding it towards the Nageeya and me, before sweeping it back towards the boat. The Nageeya seemed to understand the action, and they started forward in a line. I followed them, holding my robe up over my feet so I wouldn't trip going up the ramp. I hurried up, but the lamp was wet from sea spray, and my foot turned underneath me. An arm reached out to grab me, helping me the rest of the way onto the longboat. I turned to thank my rescuer, but a gasp escaped me when I found myself staring into the snarling bronze face.
"Do not let Captain Osuko frighten you, Yori," said Hotaki with a laugh, "though he does enjoy frightening young women."
My face burned, however. My first impression to the people of Lord Ashiro-han's house was one of clumsiness, and I could see the Nageeya gathered in a small circle whispering to each other over my fumble.
The soldiers folded the ramp back up and carried it back to a corner of the deck. Hotaki waved his fan at the person behind the boat's steering device; it was a black-clad servant with a featureless white mask, like Hotaki's two escorts.
The woman who had stood by Hotaki went down underneath the deck; Hotaki motioned for the women and me to follow her. The Nageeya hurried ahead of me, their heads held high, their posture rigid. I followed them, being careful as I went down the steps. I turned my head to see if I could have gotten one last look at my parents and Grandmother, but Hotaki and Captain Osuko were standing in the way.
Underneath the deck was dark, the ceiling low. For once I appreciated my lack of height, for the Nageeya had to duck so as not to hit their heads on the beams. The woman led us to a small room, and took her place behind a low desk. The Nageeya once more formed a line, with me at the very back. The woman called each Nageeya in turns, and when the last went into the room, I felt my heart hammering again.
"Next!" came the woman's call. I went into the room, sliding its door shut behind me. The woman had her head bowed over something, and I had the fleeting thought that she was speaking to whatever was in her hands.
"Kneel," she ordered.
I knelt before her, my hands placed on my knees. The woman looked up, setting the little box that she had had aside on her desk. I tried not to gasp when she looked at me. She was the most beautiful woman I had ever seen, with few wrinkles and the most appealing shape of her head, her nose long in the ideal 'fox' appearance, except for one thing: her eyes were nothing but white circles set in her face.
I had seen blind people before, but their eyes had been no different from the eyes of those who could see, but something told me that this woman who knelt behind the desk was indeed blind. Without an iris or a pupil, sight would have been impossible.
"Family name?"
"Matamura," I replied.
The woman lifted the box and held it up to my face. "Say it into this."
Disturbed, I leaned forward to speak into the box. "Matamura."
"Personal name?"
I spoke to the box again. "Yori."
"Age?"
"Eighteen."
"Date of birth?"
"Third night of the full moon in the fourth month of the thirty-eighth year of the dolphin calendar." My tongue felt twisted after that mouthful, even though Grandmother had had me recite it all morning.
The woman ran the fingers of her free hand over the sheet of paper in front of her. I looked down quickly, seeing it was a paper with raised bumps on it.
"Your family's zodiac symbol?"
"Dolphin."
"Speak into the box please."
I leaned forward and repeated what I had said into the box, confused as to why I had to speak to it. The woman nodded and set the box back on her desk, consulting the abacus on the desk. She moved a few beads and whispered something to the box.
"You are free. Please go through the door opposite where you had first come in."
I stood, still confused by the little box. "May I ask a question?"
The woman's head snapped up. "Ask a question?" she asked, sounding as if asking a question was some kind of crime. "I suppose so."
"What's the purpose of the box?"
The woman smiled. She held up the box, turning a little lever on the side. My voice came back to me, sounding…crackly, almost. I stared at it in shock. I had never really thought about my voice before, and to hear it coming out of something that wasn't my mouth…
"I can't write very well without sight," said the woman. "This box is a western invention. It records the sound of your voice to play back to others."
"It's quite wonderful," I said. "I've never seen or heard anything like it."
The woman smiled as the box finished with my voice; she turned the lever again as the voice of the Nageeya before me began to sound back. The box went silent. "You're the only one who asked what this was."
"I just wanted to know what it was."
The woman nodded. "Curiosity can be a good thing. You may go now."
I bowed to her despite knowing she couldn't see me, and left the room.
The Nageeya were waiting there, kneeling in front of a low table that had small bowls of rice and fish, and little cups of tea. I hadn't eaten all day, so I knelt at the table and helped myself to one of the bowls. The Nageeya I had knelt next to inched away from me, but I ignored her so I could eat my meal. I ate my rice slowly, not wanting to appear a slob before the highly educated and almost perfect Nageeya. Though not on the tier of nobility, they were yet above me, and I had to show proper etiquette before them.
"Pass me that sauce."
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I looked up, realizing the tallest Nageeya was speaking to me. I looked around the low table. I saw that the tall Nageeya was reaching across her companion, her sleeve trailing in the shorter girl's bowl. I passed the tall Nageeya the bowl of sauce, and she ladled it over her rice.
I guessed I was the youngest there, and as I was on the lowest tier among the women, I had to do what they commanded of me.
The tall girl dipped some of her fish in the sauce and looked about the table. "Why, everyone's so quiet," she said, "like we're being led to the slaughter."
One of the Nageeya spoke. "It could be that we are being led to the slaughter, knowing that all six of Lord Ashiro-han's wives are dead."
"And what makes you think that number seven will share the same fate?" the tall Nageeya said. "Seven is the heavenly number."
"It can also be a bad number if the zodiac is upside-down," I said. Thought I had never used a zodiac, I knew from hearing priests talk that having an upside-down zodiac was a very bad thing.
The tall Nageeya turned her black eyes to me. "Nobody gave you permission to speak."
"Shut up," said one of the other Nageeya. "She's not a peasant."
"She's still of a lower tier, and the youngest here."
The Nageeya who had rebuked the black-eyed one turned to me. "How old are you exactly?"
"Eighteen," I said.
The Nageeya pursed her lips. "Then you are the youngest. What's your name?"
"Matamura Yori," I said.
The nicer Nageeya's eyes widened. "Matamura? Your father is Tatsuo the merchant?"
I nodded my head.
"Because of your father's trade, we have these wonderful robes. Satin from the west could not have gotten here without your father's business!"
I smiled and lowered my eyes to my bowl.
"I'm Kitsei," said the Nageeya. "The tall, mean one is Fumei"—the black-eyed Nageeya snorted—"that's Amei"—she motioned to an apple-faced Nageeya—"and that's Omei." The last Nageeya was a slender young woman with a small, round nose like a button.
"I'm nineteen," said Kitsei. "We're almost the same age."
I nodded as she lifted some of her fish to her mouth. She had pale eyes, almost green, that I hadn't seen very often among our people. I had to admit that Kitsei was very beautiful, with a perfectly oval head, and skin so smooth and fair it was like someone had already painted her with rice-water paste. Her hands were long and slender, her wrists thin. I marveled at her; she had the perfect tube-like figure that I had always wanted. The girl with the button nose, Omei, was almost the same way. Amei was fuller, almost like me, but I guessed she was more graceful. Fumei almost had the reed-stalk figure, and I could see her cheekbones, prominent on her long face.
I had never really been around girls close to my age. The only women I knew well were Mother and Grandmother. I only knew girls from brief encounters when my father would go to the houses of his workers, and I would play with the girls with their dolls, until of course I reached the age where playing with dolls fell from my favor, and I would simply sit around and watch the other girls play chess or some other game like that.
I wondered why Father and Mother had never sent me to Nageeya academy. Most of the girls were the daughters of merchants themselves—surely if I married into nobility, or even the house of the emperor, they would have approved of it.
Perhaps…perhaps it is because I'm not fit to be a Nageeya. I looked down at myself, not looking back up at the Nageeya. Nageeya also had their names changed, I remembered when I thought of the similarities in all the girls' names. I like my name, at least, and I didn't want to have to give it up—one of the few possessions I had—just to become a wife of royalty. Nageeya, once handed to the houses, were no longer property of their family, but property of the house matriarch, who could do with them whatever she wished.
I tried to finish my meal, but I had lost my appetite. My fate loomed above me, almost like a shadow hanging over my shoulder and breathing down my neck. Father had made me promise that I wouldn't deliberately fail, but the thought of it was tempting. I wanted to fail on purpose, but I couldn't imagine the further humiliation I would have brought to my family name. I wanted to bring conversation back, perhaps discuss the matter of the white-eyed woman, but none of the Nageeya seemed concerned over the woman, so I kept my mouth shut.
I heard no creaking of wood as the boat went across the water, and I felt no rocking to make me sick. My best guess was that the boat did have some sort of blessing on it.
I finished with my small meal, and the door I had come through opened, the white-eyed woman stepping among us. She clapped her hands, and two of the masked servants came from the shadows. Amei shrieked, and Fumei reached over to cover her mouth. I myself was startled—the servants had been hanging in the shadows while we talked and ate. None of us had noticed them at all.
"Don't let the servants frighten you," said the white-eyed woman. I leaned back so one of the servants could scoop up the dishes. I studied the servant, still trying to see what there was for them to hide behind masks, but the servant turned its face to me as it straightened, and I looked down. I didn't know if the servant could see me—there were no holes in their masks for eyes—but I still felt like it was wrong to look them in the face.
"I am Komo-me-no," said the woman, "the master of Lord Ashiro-han's house."
I tried not to show my confusion over her words. Only a manservant could be the master of a Lord's house; he was the one who managed the lord's accounts, who organized events, who brought cases before a lord for the lord's approval. Those were skills that women weren't taught. I looked around the table to see the confusion apparent on the faces of the Nageeya around me.
"It is my duty to oversee the testing of you young women who are being brought before Lord Ashiro-han seeking to be his wife," the woman, Komo, continued. "Only one of you will make it to being his wife, or none at all." She tucked her hands into her sleeves and came a few steps forward. "You are at the mercy of the house of Lord Ashiro-han now. You may have had your educations, and some of you here are Nageeya, trained to be wives to the highest men in our land. You will be expected to act like you are walking among the clouds."
I swallowed a lump in my throat. Walking among the clouds was a term used for a woman who was expected to walk with grace, beauty, and even seductiveness: three things I was certain I lacked.
"Lord Ashiro-han is not concerned with beauty," Komo went on. "I myself, a blind woman, do not know what you look like. For all I know, the five of you could look like pigs and monkeys, but that is the least of our concern. Do not think that you will beguile Lord Ashiro-han with your looks. You will all act like a lord's wife."
"Komo-no," said Amei, her face paler than before. "We won't die, will we?"
I looked over to see Fumei give Amei a swat on the back of her head. Komo did not laugh. She sighed and hung her head.
"I know some of you might be frightened," she said. "Lord Ashiro-han has had six wives—more than any other lord in the seven regions. But his priest has foreseen that the time is right. I suggest you pray for courage."
She bowed to us; the Nageeya all rose, and I rose with them, to bow to Komo. Komo straightened and left, and it was then that I realized there was a soft hand in mine. I looked over to see Kitsei glance at me. She wasn't that much taller than I was, and her being about my age made me feel some sort of closeness to her.
"You're not scared, are you?" she asked me as we sat back down.
I squeezed her hand. "I'm very scared," I said.
"I think you two are just being stupid," said Omei. "What's there to be afraid of?"
Amei, the little frightened one, was crying. Fumei snorted at her. "With a man who has had six dead wives, there's plenty to be frightened of. I wonder if he had them killed."
"Fumei!" Omei hissed. She pointed to the shadows of the little room, then gasped in surprise. "The servants aren't there."
"I wonder if they left," Fumei said, rolling her eyes to the ceiling, her voice thick with sarcasm.
Amei was still crying, either from fear or from the swat to the back of her head, or both. Kitsei released my hand to pat Amei's.
"Don't cry, Amei," she said. "Perhaps you won't be married to Lord Ashiro-han."
"I know. What's there in you for the lord to find attractive enough to marry?" Fumei said. "I doubt he'd want to bed you. Even if he's not concerned with beauty, you're too thick, like the merchant girl."
I clenched my jaw in anger towards the black-eyed woman. "At least she has flesh on her bones, instead of looking like Ago-Yan," I said. "You hardly look healthy enough to carry a baby."
Fumei didn't seem disturbed by my comment. "I don't intend on carrying any children for him. I'm going to deliberately fail."
"Then I hope you bring dishonor on your house," I said.
Fumei shrugged and inspected her fingernails.
The door slid open again and this time Hotaki entered the little room, dipping his head towards us. "We approach the island. It is time for you to come up onto the deck."
We rose; I straightened my robe, noticing the trembling in my fingers as I did so. Fumei led the line towards the doorway, with me at the back, as usual. Kitsei turned and gave me a smile, and I smiled back, hoping I didn't look like a skull when I did so. I had never been quite fond of my smile, and it wasn't pleasant when I gave a nervous smile.
A wave of cold air hit my face when we ascended the steps onto the deck. I looked towards the back of the boat; the mainland was nothing more than a faint line of red clay rooftops and snowcapped mountains in the distance. I had never been so far from home before, not even inland—and now I was in the middle of the sea, about to set foot on an island I had only seen from my window.
The rooftops of the lord's home loomed high above the water. I had never thought the island was so big; cliffs hundreds of feet tall rose out of the water, dwarfing our little boat, and a wall circled the top of the cliffs, enclosing the lord's house within. Either the wall kept the world out, or the wall kept Lord Ashiro-han locked in.
The boat turned the curve of the island, and a gate jutting out of the water greeted us. It was framed on either side by the large rocks that surrounded the island like jagged teeth, a sure discouragement to invading ships. Two masked soldiers stood on either side of the gate, and I watched as Hotaki snapped his fan open and waved to the soldiers. The soldiers began turning huge cranks, slowly opening the doors of the gate.
I felt Kitsei's hand slip into mine again. I put my hand on her arm, giving her a reassuring smile, but she wasn't looking at me. Her pale green eyes, wide and terrified, were looking up at the clifftops.
The gates were fully opened; the boat glided through a tunnel before opening up into a sort of cove. The island sloped down and inward towards the cove, and I could see two more longboats anchored in the cove. There was a sort of beach, and from the beach rose a smaller cliff with a staircase carved into it. I turned to look behind me, seeing the tunnel growing smaller as the boat went across the water.
Lord Ashiro-han's house sprawled over the island, different levels built up over the rising ground, the wall only on the outer ring of the island. Ancient pines stood at the clifftops, looking down over the water. It was a magnificent sight to behold, and I found myself wondering what the island looked like in full bloom of summer.
The longboat pulled up to a dock; the soldiers stepped forward and lowered the unfolding ramp. Komo led the line down onto the dock, and when we had all stepped off—Hotaki included—Komo turned to us. "Is everyone off the boat?"
Hotaki counted heads. "We have everyone here."
Komo gave a nod of her head. "Good."
She led us across the beach to the staircase. Kitsei still had a hold of my hand, but she had to let go—the staircase was only wide enough for one person at a time, with a wall boxing us in against the cliff face.
The stairs were somewhat slick with ice, and we went carefully and slowly. My foot slipped on a patch of ice; I seized up with panic, but before I could fall all the way back down, I felt Hotaki, who was behind me, catch me and straighten me.
"I'm sorry," I said. "I should watch my footing."
Hotaki's face was somewhat pale, perhaps with the thought of tumbling down the stairs himself. "Happens to everybody," he said.
We resumed our ascent. The stairs, though slick, weren't steep, and the climb wasn't as bad as I would have expected. We reached the top, where a stone yard waited for us, more stairs at the end with twin dragon statues on either side. Beyond the stairs was a low wall covered in bare flower vines. Komo led us across to the small round door in the wall, opening it to reveal a stone courtyard filled with the naked, brown bushes that used to hold flowers. There was an empty fountain in the center, and at the end of the courtyard was a little house.
"These are your guest quarters," Komo said as she led us across the courtyard. "You will stay here for the testing."
One of the main buildings of the lord's house looked over the courtyard. As a cold breeze blew over the courtyard, I glanced up at the building, seeing a man standing on the balcony looking down at us. I couldn't see his face from where I was, but a chill that came from within me ran over my body as I looked at the man. He wore black robes, and I caught the glint of a sword's sheath at his side. Only a lord carried such a weapon.
The man turned, and I caught a glimpse of black hair tousled by the wind, a flash of a white dragon on the robe. I felt an overwhelming wave of sadness hit me like the same sadness I had felt looking down at Lord Ashiro-han seven years ago…
I was certain I hadn't seen a servant.