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The Saintess Will Try Again
Chapter 7 - Eyes Closed

Chapter 7 - Eyes Closed

Hugo had taken up Ryu’s offer to stay the night, although Yuna wouldn’t be any freer the next day. They were given a single room at the estate, but even that was generous.

“I didn’t know this was a private villa,” Hildebrand said. “Don’t worry, this room is plenty big.”

“I’m not worried,” Hugo said. “Beats camping. We were practically on top of each other.”

He meant his companions. The Saintess had the privilege of being all alone in her own private tent when she and her Paladins ventured towards the World’s End in the past world alongside Hugo’s party.

“I wouldn’t know,” Hildebrand said.

The jingle of a small bell knocking against the sliding door stole Hugo’s attention. He slid the door slightly open and then stood there like a statue.

“Who is it?” Hildebrand asked.

“Hi,” Hugo whispered.

Hildebrand peeked between Hugo’s legs and saw the long robes of a woman.

“Is it Yuna?” she asked, getting up. She’s not going to complain we’re sharing a room, is she? thought Hildebrand.

It was Yuna. Or at least that’s how it seemed at first glance. The woman had shorter hair, and a cold and composed gaze the brat didn’t. Her red eyes were darker, like the color of blood.

“Hello,” Hildebrand said.

Yuna’s doppelgänger simply nodded before pushing the sheets into Hildebrand’s arms. The woman glanced once at Hugo, who was entranced by her, before briskly walking away as quietly as she arrived, like a ghost.

Hildebrand didn’t want to say anything. She didn’t want to put her ignorance on full display. To her, the woman looked like Yuna, but so did Ryu in a way. Even some of the attendants looked similar, other than the royals’ piercing red eyes.

After a short eternity of staring down the hallway, Hugo walked over to his mat on the floor and fell onto it like a sinking rock. “It wasn’t her,” Hugo muttered.

Instead of asking, How could you tell? Hildebrand threw a blanket onto him and blew out the candles. Hugo had already turned to his side, curling up in sleep. Hildebrand sat on her own thin pad on the floor, stretching her legs out.

“How can you sleep on this?” Hildebrand asked of Hugo.

Hugo rolled over to face Hildebrand from his mat on the other side of the room. “You’ve slept on worse,” he said.

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“I have?” asked Hildebrand. “I’m pretty sure I haven’t.”

Hugo grunted and rolled back around, putting his back to Hildebrand. “It’s plenty comfortable to me. Just go to sleep.”

Hildebrand laid down as Hugo asked. “How are you liking things so far?”

“…It’s not bad,” he said.

Hildebrand smiled to herself; she could go to sleep without any concerns. But it didn’t come to her, or to Hugo. The quiet breathing kept her awake. She wasn’t sure if it was hers or his, but she could tell it was restless.

“Why did you betray me?” Hugo asked. “Since when?”

“You’re still going on about that?” Hildebrand asked back. “From the start, probably.”

Hildebrand stared at the ceiling for what felt like an eternity in the room's dark. She thought about the darkness of the chill night in the streets of Apollyon, where she clasped her hands together and sent endless prayers to the black sky before sleeping. It was her oldest memory.

“Have you ever listened to people’s prayers, Hugo?” Hildebrand asked.

“…No,” he said.

“Do you know what people pray for?” Hildebrand asked.

“No.”

“They pray for happiness.” Hildebrand paused and thought before continuing. “To have enough food for one more day. To be loved. To be strong. To see their sons return home. To see their families one last time… They pray for deliverance.”

She continued, “I wanted to answer their prayers—“ but stopped. Hildebrand shut her eyes. She wanted to tell Hugo, They also pray for love they can possess, for more money than they know what to do with, to escape judgment for their evil deeds, for the downfall of others, to hold the world in the palms of their hands, but she didn’t. She didn’t want to lecture him about one more dreadful thing. Hildebrand let a silence fill the room instead. It was better for the air to be dead and empty, than filled with people’s sinful thoughts.

“I just wanted to answer their prayers,” she lied. “I didn’t want to turn a blind eye,” she lied. “I wanted to fulfill the duties of the Saintess.”

“Is that why you killed so many people?” Hugo asked.

“…That’s right,” Hildebrand replied. “I couldn’t let anything get in my way. Even if that meant betraying everyone.”

“Is that why you let people die? You could have saved more people if you used your true powers from the start.”

Hildebrand turned her head to find Hugo staring at her. Even in the dark room she could see his sea-green eyes that shimmered gently like emeralds. It was the only dim light in the darkness. Even the moonless, starless sky outside was pitch black, yet Hildebrand could find his eyes staring through her.

“That’s right,” she lied. “Everything was according to my perfect plan.”

“Couldn’t things be good as they were?” Hugo asked. “Wasn’t the happiness we already had good enough?”

“Happiness?” Hildebrand asked. Even after Altamea’s Fire was retrieved, and the hordes of the World’s End quelled and sealed away, the despair was endless. “People’s prayers were endless,” she said. Her despair when she opened her eyes to the state of the world was as bottomless as the World’s End and as vast as the black cosmos. “What happiness?”

“We have to be happy with what we have. People’s prayers will always be endless,” said Hugo. “Even if they have everything.”

“Don’t remind me,” Hildebrand said. “I haven’t forgotten. But shouldn’t someone still answer them? If I don’t, who will?”

“It wasn’t your burden to carry,” Hugo said.

“Then whose was it?” She sneered. “Altamea?”

“No one’s,” Hugo said.

“You were the Hero,” Hildebrand said. He was the one who gave hope to everyone, to the ones who feared and derided him, to the ones who uttered the word “Hero” with contempt and mockery, even the hopeless. “You should understand me.”

“I just wanted to hold on to the things right in front of me,” Hugo said. He stared into Hildebrand’s eyes. “I only wanted to protect the person in front of me.”

“Ugh,” Hildebrand growled. “Spare me your nonsense.” She closed her eyes. And she turned her back to him once more.