I was sitting at the bar. I was getting ready to feel sorry for myself. My friends had insisted that today would be a good day to get together and celebrate my birthday. I get not being able to get together on the day. This year it landed on a Monday. So pushing it back to the Friday after, honestly made for sense. Ken ducking out was fine. His toddler was sick. He should be home with them. Bob’s car broke down. His day and tomorrow were probably going to be worse than my time now. I don’t know how he was going to get to work. Then there was Frank, Tom and Phil. They all in the last ten minutes had messaged me that they were not going to make it. no details.

The bar wasn’t exactly hopping but it was probably half full. It was just about right. There was enough background noise that you basically had privacy, but it wasn’t enough to overwhelm you. if I was more outgoing it wouldn’t be that bad to just have another few drinks, watch the game, and go home. Not ideal but what is. Trouble is, I was shy and it always felt weird to talk to strangers.

I was just about to pay my tab and go when, someone put a hand on my shoulder and sat down next to me. That was a bit odd, but the bar was beginning to get crowded. It was either sit next to me or next to another rando.

I looked over to find a lady with long brown hair. She was dressed in a jacket, jeans, and sneakers. She looked back at me. she seemed confused that I was looking over at her.

I shrugged, “Sorry, I, I didn’t mean to get in your way.”

She blinked and gave me a strangely pleased smile, “No, no, no, no. My bad. I spent the last few days being invisible. People ignore you for a long enough time, you sort of just assume that is what happens.”

“I get that,” I said. “I am sort of dealing with the same thing myself.”

“Oh?” the lady asked. “What’s up?”

“I am currently celebrating my birthday,” I said. “So far you are the only person to show up.” I paused. “Sorry, that came across as needy.”

“No worries, dude,” she said. “I am in a similar situation. I only got like two friends in this town and they both ghosted me. I’m Lyssa.”

“Call me Ted,” I said. “I ordered another beer. Lyssa ordered a rum and coke.

“What do you do Ted?” Lyssa asked when ads came on the TV.

“I am an executive assistant. It is a secretary gig. I spend the day just sort of filling gaps so other people can do their jobs. What about you?” I asked.

“I am sort of freelance consultant. I observe situations and advise. It helps people chose the next steps, but most of the time what I say leads to out-processing.” She explained.

“You don’t look corporate,” I said.

“I am not, big organizations don’t need me. I work with small groups and individuals mostly.” She said.

I nodded. “Contract work pay well?”

“The pay is fine, I am just good at it and thus have a lot of job stability.” The game came back on. We watched for a while.

My phone buzzed. It was a message from Tom. I opened it. a picture a Tom, Frank, and Phil at another bar with a few women I didn’t know. A moment later another message popped up. it read: Bob you coming? I know your car isn’t busted. They have a friend.”

Something acidic churned in my stomach. They had ditched me on my birthday. Tom must have sent this to the wrong group. My hand started shaking. I was so angry. I am not one of those turn read and start screaming types. I get quiet. Apparently, I pale slightly.

It wasn’t that they didn’t invite me along. It was that they set this up, and then lied to me. It was the extreme lack of consideration. I do not like being lied to. I mean most folks don’t like that, but my parents lied to me all the time. Heinous shit. One Christmas they told me I was naughty so Santa left nothing. They had just spent the money on booze. So, I take lies personal. Tom, fucking knew this.

“Yeah!” Lyssa cheered watching the game, she turned to me, “Hey, Ted, you okay?”

I had to take several deep breathes to talk, “My…friends, ditched me.” I managed.

“Yeah, and we are hanging out instead,” she said not getting it.

I showed her my phone, “They lied to me. They just didn’t want to hang out with me.”

“Fuckers,” she said shaking her head in disappointment. She looked closer, “I know where this place is. it’s the Diesel Club.” She paused a moment, “Want to head over there and hear what they have to say?”

I really considered that for a moment. “Yes. Yes I do.”

“It’s across town you got a car?” Lyssa knocked back her drink.

I did the same, and paid my tab, “yep.”

“Cool, let’s go. Things like this require momentum,” she said.

I nodded and fell into step with Lyssa.

We got into my car, Lyssa hopped into the passenger seat, and buckled up, “Take main and turn left on maple avenue.” After a moment she asked, “Why do you think they did this?”

“I am not going to lie. I am one of those people that just doesn’t fit in. I see all these people just comfortable in social situations. I can’t do that. weirdly enough talking to you has been shockingly non-stressful.” I explained.

Lyssa nodded, “I get that a lot. Take seventh”

This story originates from Royal Road. Ensure the author gets the support they deserve by reading it there.

A really strange thought hit me. “Don’t laugh. I know this is going to sound stupid, but I just have to keep talking. When I was little my grandmother would say, when things are at the worst, look for the angels. You popping up seems not so coincidental.”

“It isn’t. good catch. Take a right here.” Lyssa replied.

“Could you elaborate on that?” I asked my heart skipped a beat.

“I am not an angel. To tell you a little-known truth, angels don’t often get involved in peoples’ day to day lives. They spend most of their time adjusting the world and reality so it doesn’t all come crashing down. They focus on the big picture. So, unless you are affecting that, you are basically beneath their consideration. I am with a more, the little details focused group.” Lyssa explained.

“What the hell does that mean,” I demanded.

Lyssa sighed, “You’re just going to make me say it. That’s fine. I am what you would call a demon, malevolent supernatural being. I spend my time finding people that have been wronged like you, and just talk. Offer a few ideas here and there. Left here, and then take the next left into the parking lot.”

I pulled into a space. “So, what you’re after my soul?”

“I couldn’t care less about that,” Lyssa said. “Demons mostly just point out possibilities. You guys are the ones that pull the trigger. Speaking of which. You going take the gun you keep in the lock box?”

I took a few deep breathes, “this seems like things are escalating quickly.”

“Momentum is key, Ted. If you don’t keep moving now. Tom is probably going to just keep fucking with you, like your mom and dad did. Don’t want that do you?” Lyssa said.

My grip on the wheel went from loose to white knuckled. I was back to being seventeen, the day I found out my parents had stolen the money I saved for college. I could hear my mother saying, “Shut the fuck up, Teddy! You aren’t going to do anything about this. It is like every time before. Either do something or just shut up.” She had been right. I didn’t do anything. If she hadn’t finally drunk herself to death two years later, I would probably still be dealing with her.

Most people describe trauma like an injury. They will go on and on about how it heals with time but leaves a scar. That isn’t quite right to me. I think a better metaphor would be: trauma is like having a piece of glass stuck under your skin. In the beginning it is just sharp and always cutting you. over time you build up calluses. This leads to longer and longer periods where it doesn’t hurt. Trouble is it is still a sharp hard point inside of you. if something put pressure on it just right. The sharp point till poke through the calluses and hits a nerve.

Lyssa’s words seemed to just be custom built to force that sharp point through my thickened skin. She shrugged, “I figured, just once you would want to be the thing that happens to others.”

I turned and grabbed the lock box behind the seat. My hands were shacking so much I was having trouble working the combination lock. Even as my hands moved something else picked at my mind and moved my lips, “I am not a bad person.”

“Phil drives his mom to the grocery store every week. Tom volunteers at a summer camp for disabled kids. Frank has saved two people with CPR. Funny how they have all this time and energy for other people, but they can’t even spare a thought to be honest and admit they don’t want to be around you.” Lyssa said ticking each point off on her fingers.

The lock popped open. I took a deep breath. I took another couple.

“let’s not waste time Ted,” Lyssa pressed. “Remember it’s about momentum.”

I took the gun out of the case. I stepped out of the car. I stuffed the gun in my waistband behind my back. My jacket hid the bulge.

“Okay, Let go.” Lyssa said. “The important thig is just keep moving. Don’t talk. Don’t think. Just act.” Lyssa said. She patted me on the shoulder and gestured toward the bar.

I paused for a moment.

“Don’t think,” Lyssa prompted with a light push.

I started walking. I had to keep moving. I had to push forward. If I didn’t do this, then my parents would have truly been right about me. That pushed me forward more that anything. Lyssa fell into step with me. She didn’t gloat. She didn’t sneer. She was just with me. How fucked was that? The only person I could think of in my entire life that was sticking with me was a demon.

That just wasn’t right.

I sighed as I walked past the door to the bar. Lyssa paused for a moment, but followed my lead. I am not going to string you along. I didn’t go in there and gun down my friends. I wanted to. That fact shook me to the very core. I followed the path beside the bar to the riverside. I got to the edge. Ten feet down was the river bubbling along some rocks.

I vomited.

I turned to Lyssa, “I can’t do it,” I managed.

She gently rubbed her hand on my back. It strangely soothed my nerves and somehow helped settle my stomach. “Yes, you can,” she said with a nod passed me.

I looked where she indicated. There they were. Frank, Phil and fucking Tom. They were staring at me. they had just stepped out of the back entrance of the bar with four women. Two looked like they were having fun. Two less so.

The moment stretched. Some iron fist seized my stomach. I felt a tooth crack from my jaw clenching.

Again I am not going to drag this out. I didn’t gun down my friends. I met each one’s gaze before walking away. They didn’t follow. Which wasn’t a surprise. I just kept walking. Oddly Lyssa kept walking with me. after nearly an hour, and I had crossed a foot bridge into the park, I asked. “Why are you still here?”

She shrugged, “why not? I got nothing better to do.”

“Why is that everyone’s reason for being around me!” I all but screamed at her.

“That answer has to come from you,” she said completely unphased.

I was about to shout something else back when I heard it. Someone sobbed. I looked off the path into the darkness, “Is someone there?” I called.

There was a rustling and what sounded like a gasp. I turned my back on Lyssa and stepped into the darkness, about twenty yard into the trees was a person laying in a pool of blood behind a bush. Holy shit there was so much blood. I knew they were dead. Then they jerked and looked at me. someone had bashed this guy’s head in. The wound was horrifying. The desperate but slightly glazed look in his eyes is the thing that still sticks with me. How long had this poor bastard been lying here? How was he still alive? How was he still conscious?

“it’s okay,” I managed. “I pulled my phone out of my pocket. I pressed 9-1-1. Before hitting send, I paused. Oh shit I was illegally carrying a concealed gun. I looked at Lyssa. She was just studying me. Fuck it. I hit send.

It took a while for EMTs and the cops showed up. I was sweating bullets the whole time. I just knew someone was going to figure out I had the gun. That I had come within a heart beat of killing someone. They didn’t. Honestly the cops seemed almost bored. According to them this sort of crime is the toughest to solve. The guy was a gang member. He would never tell them who attacked him. They offered to give me a lift back to me car. I took it. They thanked me for my time and help and drove away. Lyssa rode with me, completely ignored by everyone but me.

I got in the car. And put the gun back in the lock box. When I looked up Lyssa was in the passenger seat.

She smiled, “I am proud of you Ted.”

“So does this mean, I win or something?” I asked.

“I never expected you to shoot anyone, Ted. You absolutely have the grit to pull the trigger. You just didn’t have a reason. People hurting you like that wasn’t enough to push you to it, not tonight anyways.” Lyssa admitted.

“Then what were you doing with me?” I asked confused.

“I never expected to stop you from being you. I just redirected you a little. If not for me you would have texted your friends. Called them assholes, and likely forgiven them by Monday. You probably will still do that. instead, you went to the bar. Walked along the river and found that guy.” She explained.

“So, are you secretly good?” I asked some wild part of really wanted to hear her admit that.

She laughed. That was the only thing she did that actually sounded mean, “Nah. Without you that man would have died. Because I pushed you a little off course, he lives. Tomorrow his brother slaughters the four guys that did that to him. Two of them die in front of their kids. Like I said, Ted, these things are about momentum. See you later,” She got out of the car and walked away.