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The Rings of Jupiter [BOOK 1 COMPLETE] [A Noir Cyberpunk LitRPG]
Chapter 48: Garters, Ferrets, Mommies, and Time

Chapter 48: Garters, Ferrets, Mommies, and Time

“No kiddin’,” Gylam roared with laughter, slapping the table. “How’d you manage that?”

“Well,” I said in a conspiratorial stage whisper. “The groom and the bride were known for their wild parties, and nobody at a wedding party notices the help. I knew a guy whose cousin worked as a cleaner at the venue. I greased his palms a little and got his outfit and the job for the night.” I tapped the side of my nose. “Nobody noticed that the drinks were a touch too strong. I found the bride and the groom snoring, half-naked on a beanbag chair. At that point, stealing the garter was almost anti-climactic. Gave it to my contact, got my money, job’s done.”

“So,” Zuri said, coming over with her beer mug and sitting down, giving me an acidic look, “you were behind that little stunt. It created a diplomatic incident, you know. That garter was a valuable heirloom on loan. Its disappearance humiliated the Chain Wolf gang, made them look weak, and caused their business network to collapse quickly and violently. It even reached our turf, and we had to step in.”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about. I simply participated in a well-paying prank on a gang of slavers. Any subsequent conflicts are none of my concern.” I said, taking a sip of my vanilla milkshake.

Gylam was right. This place was great. Non-fabricated food had a quality all of its own. Naturally, the cherry at the top of the foam was fabricated. Nobody was crazy enough to waste a fortune on real fruit, let alone for a milkshake, but even the unidentifiable false quality of the cherry got covered by the creamy drink.

“Damn, wherever this cow level is, I need to go there for a visit at some point. I haven’t had real cheese in years.” I wistfully sighed.

Zuri rolled her eyes at my antics. “Who put you up to that mission anyway?”

My mood instantly darkened, and the thoughts I was purposefully avoiding flooded in. I thought about Orelia. What Varhas said. The wound was still open. I knew it would stay that way until I hunted her down and made her talk. A crack snapped me out of it, and I looked down at the glass of milkshake sporting a new jagged line on its surface. Fuck. “Confidential,” I said.

Zuri got the hint and turned to Gylam. “Right. So. Do you care to explain what is going on with…” She pointed down at the plump Ferret, happily eating a piece of a pancake.

“What? Rufus? What’s wrong with him? He’s a healthy little boy!” Gylam said, sounding almost offended.

“Too healthy, considering you shot him with a shotgun strong enough to carve a chunk out of that wolf,” I said, nabbing a fry off of Zuri’s plate as she got distracted wiggling her fingers at Rufus, who was sniffing at her.

“Oh, that! Yeah!” Gylam said with a chuckle. “You should have seen your faces. Rufus is a rare subspecies of the [Iron-Fur Ferret] called the [Mag-Fur Ferret]. Their fur isn’t made of metal, but they can pick up and shape metal that touches their fur.”

“They must be quite the fierce creatures to battle if they can withstand powerful shotgun blasts,” Zuri said, letting out a delighted squeak when Rufus climbed in her outstretched hand.

Gylam looked down at Rufus with a warm smile. “Well, Rufus is a bit of a special case. He can only shape molten metal, but his control of it is incredible. Most [Mag-Fur Ferrets] take hours to shape the metal they pick up and use it to create crude shells. We think that’s why Rufus was abandoned by his group. Poor guy must have seemed defective to his siblings without molten metal easily available.”

I focused on the little creature.

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[Rufus - Molten Mag-Fur Ferret - Alpha 6.78.33.12]

Level: 26

[Further information private due to companion bond]

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“A special case, indeed.’ I muttered to myself. “How’d you figure out what his ability was?” I turned to Gylam, who winced.

“Well, y’see. When I was fightin’ them beasties, I had just gotten my new shotgun, the one you saw, from a loot box I found in a middle chamber of the 2nd floor. It has a subroutine that turns all the bullets superheated. I killed the first [Rubyclaw Mantis] with a couple of shots, but when I turned to fire on the second one, Rufus jumped in the way of the blast. Thought I’d killed him, I did. Gave me a real fright, but he just grabbed all the molten metal, shaped it into blades, and used the momentum to spin himself into the Mantis’ body. Ate it from within.” he said with another chuckle. “It’s how we came up with that move you saw.” His voice trailed off as he noticed the silence at our table, and both Zuri and I stared at him intensely.

“Did you say loot box?” Zuri asked.

Gylam clamped his hands to his mouth. “Oh, I wasn’t supposed to say that in front of tourists.” Then he caught himself and gave us a puzzled look. “Wait a moment. You two are Senior Delvers, you said. How can you not know that? We spent a week learnin’ about loot in trainin’.”

I cleared my throat. “Just assume we know a little less than the average.”

Gylam squinted at us with suspicion before shaking his head and shrugging. “Eh. Don’t care. None of my business. Loot Boxes are randomly placed around a chamber every reset. Sometimes there’s more, sometimes less, but they are generally rare. Most of the loot comes from people who died in the chamber and didn’t have their bodies collected, so you can find some pretty useful stuff for the floor you’re on. The deeper you get, the better-equipped people are in general, so the loot boxes contain more valuable stuff.”

“I see,” I hummed, “We should try and find some.”

Gylam shook his head with a grin. “Not on the Frontier, you won’t. With it being open to the public, there are always dozens of unaffiliated treasure hunters scouring the place for them. And with most of the people who die in this chamber being rookies or tourists, the chance of finding any worthwhile loot is slim. Better save it for the deeper chambers.”

I shrugged, conceding the point. “Fair enough. Speaking of which, we should retire for the night and get plenty of rest for tomorrow.”

“Oh,” Gylam said, sounding surprised. “Already?”

I looked at him askance, “Well, it’s best we get eight hours before sunrise, right?”

“Oh, right, right, yeah,” Gylam said with a smile. “Well, don’t let me keep you. I’ll meet you here tomorrow at sunrise. Have a good night, you two.” He waved at us and walked outside of the cozy inn.

Zuri and I stood up and headed upstairs toward our rooms. “Have a good night,” Zuri said with a smile as she opened her door and stepped inside.

Stolen from its rightful author, this tale is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.

“Goodnight,” I replied and entered my room. It wasn’t anything even close to a hotel, but the plain desk with a simple synthwood chair and the unremarkable bed, somehow gave the room a rustic feel. I opened the window and took a deep breath, enjoying the view of the town at night.

Gylam had explained to us that the more electricity a location used, the more compelled wild creatures were to attack it, so the town avoided anything electronic, resorting to torches. It gave the town a fairytale look, the false sky above us twinkling with the illusion of stars.

I heard the sound of someone grunting and then a group of men rowdily laughing. It seemed like the town wouldn’t sleep for a while yet. I closed the window and headed to bed.

The following day, Zuri and I met Gylam in front of the inn, having eaten our fill of a decadent breakfast full of juicy cuts of meat and pancakes.

“Good morning, you two,” Gylam said, his goggles and bright smile glinting in the sunrise.

“Morning, Gylam,” I replied with a nod. “Best get right to business. We’re looking for doors fulfilling certain criteria. We don’t know how many there are, but we have an item that will allow us to identify a suitable door when we get to it. I was thinking we should start with the nearest doors.”

Gylam nodded. “A solid plan.” I watched his Novas light up as he pulled up the map and shared his window with us. “It’s early enough that we should be able to go to several of them before the first key-hunters return. I suggest we start by checking the doors here.” He highlighted several dots in the forest to our east.

“Not north-west?” Zuri asked. “The map says there is a fairly big grassland with a few doors. They should be easier to get to.”

Gylam shook his head with a grimace. “True, but keys tend to go up in price the easier and faster the doors are to get to. With you two being new, you couldn’t afford the cheapest keys on the market. The grasslands have very few beasties to kill and are crawling with key hunters trying to make marks, so you wouldn’t have much chance to change your fortunes. If we go to the eastern forest, we’ll have a harder time getting to the doors, but if we can’t find a door that suits your tastes, we’ll at least have made money. Maybe we’ll find a key, too!”

“Sounds like a plan,” Zuri said, “Lead the way.”

As Gylam turned to guide us towards the eastern gate, I noticed him wincing slightly. “You alright?” I asked.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” he told me with a smile, “Breakfast just ain’t sittin’ right in me belly, is all.”

“Fair enough,” I nodded, a smile creeping on my lips and thoughts of epic battles and glorious loot filling my mind. I can’t wait to see more of this place.”

“This isn’t your first time here, right?” Zuri asked, but then raised her finger and stopped in place. “Hold on a moment.” She took a slow, deep breath. I was confused by what she was doing until the heavenly scents coming out of the door of a nearby bakery hit my nose.

I smiled at her and rolled my eyes as I kept walking. She stood for a moment longer and then jogged to rejoin us.

“Every time I came to the Frontier, I stayed in town. The last time was for a job to keep tabs on a rebellious young member of a clan that will go unnamed that decided to swipe some of his father’s Delver Marks, run away to the Frontier, and taste freedom for as long as he could afford. His family hired me to ensure their precious little boy’s fun vacation wasn’t interrupted by any attempts on his life.” I said sardonically. “I had to watch him get blackout drunk and awkwardly flirt with women who could looked like they could bench press him for eleven days straight. I don’t think he’d ever flirted with anyone before. At first, it was funny. Then it was embarrassing. Then it was sad.”

Zuri giggled. “Did he find any success?”

I shook my head sadly. “Unfortunately, his main tactic with flirting was to list all the compliments his mother had given him and why. From those who gave him the time of day, most lost interest around number seven.” I sneaked a glance at Zuri, who was listening to me with a wide smile. “Ah, there was this one woman who seemed very interested, though! Tall, tan, with short blond hair. She looked like she crushed watermelons with her legs for a living. And speaking of melons-”

Zuri interrupted me with a cough and a stern glare.

I flashed her a grin and pointed at a nearby stall selling watermelon popsicles. “I was thinking, when we get back, we should get one of these! They look good.” I paused, acting innocent. “What were you expecting me to say?”

She snorted and gave my shoulder a light slap. “So, what happened with that woman?”

I grinned at the memory. “She told him,” I made my voice husky and sultry, “You really love your mother, don’t you? I can be your mommy if you want.”

“No way!” Zuri said incredulously, her eyes wide. Her lips were tightly pressed together, and her face was getting red with effort.

“Oh yeah, to which he replied with,” I made my voice high and reedy, doing my best to sound absolutely hammered. “How dare you imply that my mother is replaceable! I am perfectly happy with the one I have, thank you very much! I shook my head with a sigh. “Then, he got up, paid his bill, and left the bar in a huff.”

I glanced at Zuri again. She was trying her best to contain her laughter. Time for the final blow. “Worst part is, either he was lucky, or his family was overprotective, but despite all the mental and emotional damage he received from all the rejections, nobody tried to kill him, so neither of us saw any type of action that entire time.” I threw my hands up in the air.

Zuri’s poise broke, let out an undignified snort, and started laughing, clutching her belly.

“My sympathies to the both of you.” She finally said as she got her laughter under control, wiping a tear away. “Well, something tells me we won’t lack for action on our way to…” her voice trailed off, and her expression fell, her good humor evaporating in an instant, replaced with concern and sadness.

Ah, shit. “I’m sorry, Zuri.” I sent in voice chat. “I let my thoughts get away from me. Exploring this place doesn’t matter. We have to get to your father.”

“No, no. It’s fine. I understand. It’s this place.” She took a deep breath and gave me a wan smile. “We’ve only seen the first chamber, and it is already wondrous. The idea of a place full of adventures, riches, and powerful foes, where you can only rely on your own strength and that of your comrades… It is intoxicating.”

“I know. But I can’t let that affect me. We have a mission to complete.” I said, steeling my resolve.

Zuri shook her head again. “We have time, Razel. We can enjoy ourselves a little.”

“But how much time? I can’t help but think that every moment we waste, your father is in more and more danger.”

Zuri’s voice grew annoyed. “My father knows what he is doing and can take care of himself. He didn’t send out an emergency signal asking for rescue. He timed his message for a reason. Knowing how he operates, he probably accounted for us taking at least two weeks to find him, even with an item allowing us to find the right doors. Detours and interruptions happen. Relax, we have time.”

I felt like I was going insane. Why was I the one pushing for haste in a mission to rescue Zuri’s father? “Look, I know we have time, but the sooner we find him, the better are the chances that-”

“That we can what, Razel? Save my father?” Zuri turned to me, her eyes full of defiance and fire. What had gotten into her? “Do you think that if there was a foe in here powerful enough to kill my father, we’d be able to make any difference towards the outcome?” She shook her head. “When we meet my father, it will either be to hear him retell his adventure before I grab the nearest blunt object and beat him half to death with it for making me worry or to collect his body.”

“Zuri, I’m just wo-”

“He is Shal Hiwara. The Patriarch of the Molten Fist Clan. The Inferno Otherlord. Demon of the Molten Fist.” With every title she listed, her voice got more and more furious. By the end, she was snarling. “He is my father. And he is fine.” she hissed.

I didn’t know what to say at the sudden outburst of fury. “Okay. He’s fine.” I said placatingly.

Zuri took a slow, deep breath and schooled her features. “Good. Glad we agree. As such, we are free to take our time. This discussion is over.” She sped up, catching up to Gylam, who walked ahead, entirely unaware of our exchange.

“Oh, hello, Miss Zuri.” He said, giving her a nod and adjusting his massive backpack.

“Hello Gylam. What can you tell me about the door we are heading to?” She gave him a smile that looked far too brittle to my eyes.