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The Reluctant Ranger
Chapter 34 - Pain of Loss

Chapter 34 - Pain of Loss

A whimper broke the silence even as sheets stirred. Raw nerves protested the action as Nicole hissed out a curse through cracked lips and a dry throat. Blinking open her eyes, she was greeted with a darkened ceiling only illuminated by the dull glow of a monitor. That awareness brought more of her current predicament to the fore and she shifted experimentally only to bite down on a scream.

Okay, everything hurt, which was both good and bad news. The good news was that Nicole was still alive despite her apparent best efforts. The bad news was that she was in a hospital room and clearly not in any shape to just up and leave. Just what sort of hospital remained to be seen, given that mysterious Ranger had been the one to guide them.

It wasn’t the first time Nicole had woken up in a hospital, though she did feel decidedly worse this time. No doubt the IV drip was providing a fair bit of relief as well, which was extremely concerning. Given all that had happened, a simple blood transfusion wouldn’t be enough to offset everything that Nicole had endured. It was a stark reminder that despite her intentions to live, she had done her level best to die once again.

Even if it was for a good cause.

That little revelation would take some time to process, as well as some talks with her therapist once she could schedule an appointment. If it wasn’t for Grace and their shared late night conversations, she probably wouldn’t have the self awareness to admit even that much.

A gentle snore rang out and Nicole turned her head as carefully as she could, not that it kept it from hurting like a bitch. What she saw finally brought a smile to her face. Grace was curled up on a rather expensive looking couch, her head on the armrest and clutching a blanket that had been laid over her.

The sight was enough to spark a hint of a smile on Nicole’s face even if it hurt to move even that much. Grace was there with her, she wasn’t alone in some unknown facility where nobody would ever be able to find her again. That alone was more reassuring than anything else she could think of.

Just like that the tension fled from Nicole’s form as she settled back on the rather comfortable hospital bed. Her pain hadn’t really dissipated, but as long as she remained still it was more of a dull hum rather than anything all encompassing. The entire situation still stank of something that would eventually bite her in the ass, but for the moment things were at the very least going well.

Even though it wasn’t quite a reassurance, Nicole let herself drift a bit, not quite falling asleep but there was definitely a fog over her thoughts from whatever cocktail they were pumping into her veins. She wasn’t sure how long it had been since the fight, there wasn’t a TV in the room and it wasn’t like her phone would be in working order either.

It was after a blink that Nicole was suddenly bathed in light, not terribly bright, but it was clear that someone had adjusted something. There weren’t any windows present, but Nicole had the vague memory of going down, not up. Of more interest was the motion that drew her heavy eyes. A brown-haired woman in a white coat was fussing over a tablet as she checked the readouts of a machine. She frowned, then turned to face the bed and her eyes widened almost comically.

“Holy fucksticks you’re awake!”

Nicole couldn’t help it, she laughed, then almost cried out at how much that single little chuckle had hurt. It wasn’t fucking fair, but there wasn’t anything she could do about it. That was until a wave of warmth spread through her as the nurse lady waved some weird glowing device over her body, and the pain diminished ever so slightly. Nicole blinked the sudden tears away and zeroed in on the ID that hung from her coat.

“It’s not a panacea, but we do have some tech that helps with recovery,” Nurse Rivers said, adjusting something on the device. “A perk of being on the forefront of reverse engineering Sylan tech is that we have all the fun toys.”

Not sure how to answer that, Nicole opted instead to just enjoy the soothing sensation that rolled off the handheld device. Vaguely she wondered where Grace was, given she wasn’t currently present, but that could wait for just a moment. Nicole needed some answers, and there were good odds that this woman could provide them.

“How long?” Nicole asked, her voice raspy as hell.

“Less than a day, Miss Hayes,” Rivers said casually, setting the device aside for a moment before stepping over to a fridge. She grabbed a small bottle of water and popped it open before sticking a straw into it and bringing it back. “Small sips please, you’re on a saline drip but your throat will be quite dry.”

Following that advice wasn’t hard, Nicole knew from experience how bad it would be and she didn’t want to vomit given how much everything currently hurt. She held each small sip for a moment, letting her mouth soak it up before she swallowed. The water was ice cold to the point it almost hurt, yet it also felt sublime on her parched tongue and throat. Barely a quarter of the bottle was down before Nurse Rivers was pulling it away despite Nicole not feeling even close to quenched.

“You’ll get more in a few minutes, but first I’ll give you the essentials,” Nurse Rivers said, taking a seat beside the bed. “You’ve been in our care for about twenty two hours. Your girlfriend has been at your side for most of that but she’s currently up in the lobby meeting with your friend in green to get an away bag. She asked if I could sit with you until she was back, given it should only take a moment or three.”

That was understandable given everything going on, and confirmed that Rivers was aware of their Ranger identities, including those that weren’t present in the building from the sound of it. As concerning as that might be, Nicole was just glad that she wasn’t among actively hostile assholes.

So of course that was when the door opened and an actual asshole stepped into the room. Nicole wasn’t going to forget the scar over the man’s eye, or the way he smirked that made her stomach turn. Xavier Sinclair walked right up to the bed, then gently took the tablet from Rivers’ hands.

“Interesting, I wasn’t expecting her recovery to be this swift,” Sinclair said, scrolling through something on the screen. “Excellent work, Kelly. You’ve outdone yourself this time.”

The woman smirked, snatching the device back. “I’m not one of the foremost experts on Sylan and Source tech for nothing.”

Wait. “You’re not a nurse?”

Kelly Rivers turned, a wry smile on her lips. “Not technically. You’re an unmasked Ranger in a secret corporate facility. We’re keeping your identity ‘need to know’ for the time being.”

“I do owe you after all,” Sinclair said with a chuckle. “You did bail our asses out following that prototype malfunction, it was only right that I do everything I could to help you in turn.”

Memories of the fire and people falling from the windows of the highrise were still fresh in Nicole’s mind. She would never forget the horror of the sight of burned bodies through the three floors that had gone up, and her nightmares ensured those memories would remain fresh. Here was the CEO of the company just casually confirming that their own research had been the cause of it!

Yet, he had helped her when it came down to it. Clearly that mystery Ranger team was working with him in some capacity, be it mercenary or otherwise. Exploring that rabbit hole would have to wait, given how she couldn’t even move without severe pain wrecking her every nerve.

No, playing nice was the only option for now, at least until she could morph agai—

This story originates from Royal Road. Ensure the author gets the support they deserve by reading it there.

“My morpher,” Nicole muttered, her eyes going wide as that decision flitted through her mind.

Sinclair grimaced, looking away.

Rivers was far more sympathetic with her expression. “I’m afraid it’s thoroughly inert now. Channeling energy like you did should have killed you, but the device we produced could siphon it through the connection your morpher held to you.”

Nicole swallowed down the profound sense of loss that was threatening to overwhelm her. “Yellow said it had been used before.”

This time it was Rivers who grimaced. “She wasn’t supposed to mention that.”

“Well she did,” Sinclair said with a sigh. “You would be correct, it was used once before, or rather, a prototype was used to save the last of the first Rangers to step forward to defend the earth.”

“White,” Nicole whispered.

The man smiled, then his entire posture changed as he went from smarmy CEO to battle hardened warrior in an instant. “Ironic that a black man was picked for the most iconic color of all the Rangers that stood in the face of the inevitable, wouldn’t you say?

Holy fuck. Nicole had told off the most famous Ranger like ever and done so without even realizing it. If she wasn’t currently in the worst pain of her life, she might have laughed at the incredulity of the idea. At least he didn’t seem upset with her, and it did set her mind at ease a bit when it came to the situation.

It also meant she could ask the question that had been on the tip of her tongue. “You never regained the ability to morph, did you?”

Sinclair smiled sadly. “No, I haven’t. As far as the Sylan were aware, I died that day.”

“Until Yellow opened her fucking mouth,” Rivers muttered.

Xavier patted Kelly on the back. “If it helps, they never knew my actual name or face. I should be safe for the time being.”

“That doesn’t stop me from worrying about you,” Rivers muttered.

There was no ignoring the feeling that Nicole was an intruder in what seemed to be a far more personal moment than they intended. As such, Nicole had fallen silent at what amounted to a rather tender display that Nicole couldn’t tell if it was genuine or for her benefit.

Thankfully the door opened, disrupting the moment, and Grace returned with a bag slung over her shoulder. She froze in place as she took in the assembled group, then her eyes drifted over to Nicole and she returned a rather tired smile.

A blonde missile nearly crashed into the bed, eliciting a pained yelp from the bedridden Ranger. Grace pulled back almost immediately, her eyes wide and shimmering with forming tears.

“Fuck, I am so sorry,” Grace hurried to say, looking Nicole over. “Are you okay? Dumb question, of course you’re not. You were literally bleeding out of your eyes. How bad is it?”

“She’ll live,” Kelly said blandly. “Nicole will see a full recovery by the end of the week, though her Ranger work is effectively done.”

Nicole looked aside, finding the table where her phone and watch sat. The phone looked to be intact, but it was hard to miss how her morpher was scorched and the screen cracked. Tears formed in her eyes as she considered how her life was going to change once more. Her employment with the fire department was likely to fall through now, and Grace no longer had a reason to spend as much time with her.

Grace was still a Ranger, but Nicole no longer was. Would the team reject her now? The thought sent tendrils of doubt through her entire being even as her empty stomach churned. A firm grip on her hand pulled her from those thoughts and into the eyes of her girlfriend.

“Hey,” Grace whispered. “You’re here. You’re safe. I’m not going anywhere.”

A whole body tremor rolled through Nicole’s form, sending jolts through her raw nerves even as she choked back a sob. Grace smiled softly, tightening her grip ever so minutely before she turned her attention to the pair in the room.

“What exactly happened?” Grace asked, taking a seat on the edge of Nicole’s bed, not once letting go of her hand. “When we tried morphing while tired it didn’t do anything like that.”

“She wasn’t just tired,” Sinclair said wearily. “Nicole was battered and near death, and she bypassed her drained morpher on top of that. The morphers regulate the flow of energy so it doesn’t tear your body apart at an atomic level.”

“What Nicole did could be called an unfiltered double morph,” Kelly Rivers explained clinically. “Rangers who have developed a deeper connection to the Source can sometimes dig a little too deep and tap into the unfiltered wellspring. You are the fifth documented Ranger to do so, and the second to survive.”

“The first was a friend,” Sinclair said. “He was a bit of a meditation nut and tapped into it by pure accident. Unfortunately he never figured out how to turn it off again and died before we could develop a way to help him.”

“His death was kept out of the media,” Kelly said, flicking through something on the tablet. “We’ve done our best to convince the US Government to keep any Ranger identities under seal. There’s no way for them to NOT learn of it, as evidenced by how they approached several teams in the early days. I helped lobby for changes to the rules after that disaster in Houston.”

Right, the team that fought back against the government when they came to register them. The people of Texas hailed them as heroes for standing up for themselves even after their identities were leaked to the media. Two of them were killed a week later by a crazy cultist that worshiped the invaders as heralds of the end times.

That was the mess Nicole was determined to avoid, but now she wasn’t even a Ranger. How was she supposed to protect herself, let alone others? Nicole wasn’t even nineteen yet and once again she was being benched due to an injury. It was her fuck up at the National Qualifiers all over again, only this time it would mean that people died.

“None of that now,” Kelly said. “Just because you can’t transform doesn’t mean you can’t be helpful. Sinclair dedicated himself to working on technology that might allow humanity to fight back once the invaders decide they’ve collected enough data from our species.”

“Oh come now,” he scoffed. “I’m hardly a scientist, that’s why I brought together so many like minds.”

“What do we do now?” Grace asked. “I talked with my team a bit and we confirmed that Maraline intends to do what she can to slow the invasion while everyone recovers.”

“You believed her?” Rivers asked with a raised eyebrow.

“I do,” Nicole said softly. “She could have slipped a blade between my ribs at any point while I was convulsing on the ground. Even Yellow would have failed to stop her if her goal was my death.”

Nicole’s voice had been scratchy at the start, and was downright hoarse by the end, but it needed to be said. Maraline might be the enemy, but she wasn’t actively malicious. She was someone sympathetic that might be able to work from within to disrupt things just enough to help. Throwing that away would be a fool’s decision.

Smiling softly, Grace grabbed the open water and carefully placed the straw in Nicole’s mouth. She sipped on it, relishing the cool moisture. The dull ache was still persistent, and flared up with every motion, but Nicole was growing used to the pain. She no longer flinched when something stabbed into her from a sudden motion.

“You’re far luckier than you realize,” Sinclair said after a moment. “Take it from someone who has fought the man, surviving an encounter with Commander Bartran is something to be quite proud of.”

Kelly snorted, shaking her head. “Nicole didn’t just survive. She kicked his ass harder than any other Ranger ever managed, yourself included. Then she went and handed another General her ass on a platter. The girl’s good, no question about that.”

“Some might call that a miracle,” Sinclair said, his voice rather dry.

A barking laugh tore free from Kelly. “Like you believe in that tripe. Nah, what happened was that the unfiltered power had all the limits for safety removed from the new abilities her team had manifested. That part was easily predicted, that it turned her already esoteric phasing ability into an effective attack was a great result and proved more than one theory of mine.”

“Ever the researcher,” Sinclair sighed. “As you can see, you’ve given us several new areas to explore in our research, not to mention a store of raw Source energy to test. Who knows, it might even be enough to restore our morphers one day.”

Hope blossomed in Nicole’s chest at that declaration, even if it was far off in the future. The idea that someone was already working on the solution to her exact predicament was like finding water in the desert. That didn’t mean she would trust them, not completely, but it was enough for her to relax just a bit.

They were caring for her, helping her survive what should have been enough to end her time on the blue sphere known as Earth. That was something Nicole was determined to avoid, and she had her friends to thank for that. She would learn from her attempt at self sacrifice, learn how to channel that into something more productive and less destructive.

Nicole would live for the sake of her friends, even if she could no longer stand beside them as equals. For now, at least.

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