Park Jiyoung
“Jiyoung are you going out?” Claire asked from behind me, as she lightly whipped the sheets which made a light slapping noise as she prepared her bed.
“Yes,” I replied as I looked above my shoulder and back at her. “I was thinking of going to the lounge area to get something to drink, before going to bed.” Claire nodded back at me as I slid the door open as it lightly creaked to the side.
“Alright,” Claire returned, as I closed the door.
Then I strode closer to the lounge area as I took a step forward. Our room was on the first floor of the inn so the lounge was much closer to our room than any other. The inn was large in both width and size, so it was easy for someone to lose their way if they didn’t know their way around. And it was made in a way which could allow the residents to enjoy their time in luxury, and comfortable.
Everything here was top notch and expensive.
There were also separate training facilities in the outer building of the inn, which connected to a garden which was on the back of the inn.
After enjoying a long refreshing bath—after a total of five days—I changed into formal clothes as I went to read the reports and news which were being broadcasted. How the sudden appearance of a dungeon shook the people!
The students who were trapped inside it. As well as the shock and anxiousness of the families.
I had also received a call from my Father. He asked about the incident and my health. But the thing which I was most curious about was that he had also asked me about Jiwoo.
Could they both have met before? I mused, as I covered each step slowly, pondering over my own thoughts. Well, Jihye worked in his guild, so it could have been that they had coincidentally met when he had visited the guild in the past. But my Father was a person of business and extreme focus and poise, even the most wealthy, powerful and influential individuals around the world always requested to have a meeting with him, but he would reject them almost all of the time.
But for him to be interested in Jiwoo, he must have something in mind. Because after all, he was Park Yujin, the guild master of the strongest guild in Korea as well as an individual who was ranked among the top ten rankers of the world Union. And his achievements had only grown since he had broken through to the
But so was Jiwoo. His talent was sort of abnormal. Every time I took my eyes off of him—each time—he would come back far stronger than his past self. And his strength was by now equal to a rank hunter, for him to defeat that basilisk, plus the skills he possessed. I had only seen one of them, the one which allowed him to teleport to any specific location like he had told me.
Jiwoo didn't come form any high, influential family, but his talent and strength were something which were far beyond those with a big background, who were provided with resources since a young age and trained by the finest.
I clenched my fist as I felt more determined. I needed to do better myself, to keep up with Jiwoo's pace, so that I don't get left behind. He was getting stronger, and leaving the others far behind him. The gap between us was always large, but now it had grown to the point, that I felt like he could fleet away, leaving me behind.
I sighed as I thought. 'Baek-Hyun must have already reported back to my Father about my breakthrough to the
But aside from all of that, it was true that without Jiwoo’s help I would have never been able to successfully breakthrough—inside the dungeon—or to even skip a rank so quickly. He shined just as brightly as the sun, egnamaticing everyone with his brightness.
But aside from that, my Father had changed drastically over the years, after the incident involving our mother. Since that incident, our family’s dynamics and relationship had withered little by little. But, we all had tried our best to not let that loss and grief destroy what we still had left.
On the sudden reminiscences of my mother, a throbbing pain began to grow near my heart, as I felt a knot stuck inside my stomach, as I remembered her face.
'After what happened to her, Father had completely changed. He completely immersed himself in work.'
But pushing those thoughts to the back of my head, I continued my short stroll to the lounge.
Despite being tired, Amelia had dragged me to the garden of the inn after I had just finished bathing. And I had also allowed her to drag me with her. I always declined Amelia whenever she proposed to going any where. And her playful banter was something which I had gotten comfortable and accustomed with.
At first, the only thing which I had been the most investing in was my training and strength. But, since meeting Jiwoo, I have come to realize that despite all the training I did, if I was not satisfied and contend with my own growth I was going through and not learning whatever I could from observing the others and things around me, then just ignorantly training on my own wouldn’t allow me to grow. He had made me realise those things.
I wanted to become someone who could stand beside Jiwoo. Even inside the basilisk dungeon, he had helped us all regardless of not worrying about his own well-being, several times.
Helping us like a leader figure.
He had also helped me when I was going through my own crisis after losing to Ryuya in the open tournament. He had honestly pointed out my shortcomings and told me how I could improve those shortcomings.
I was grateful that I had met Jiwoo that day inside the devil’s whisper dungeon. If I hadn’t met him that day, then I don’t think I would have been able to change so much in such a short time.
Pondering over my thoughts, I realised that I had reached the lounge area. I walked closer to the lounge, as I saw Lucas Claymore leaving.
He silently walked past me, as he slowly made his way back.
My gaze drifted across the lounge as I saw Jiwoo sitting on one of couches placed in here. And currently he was on call with someone.
But just as I was about to walk closer to him and call out to him, I stopped as I saw his face deeply frowning with shock and worry. But the concern in his eyes had a deeper meaning.
He shot up from the couch as he tightly gripped his phone as he tired to dash out of the lounge.
I quickened my pace and held on to his hand and held him back as I asked.
“Jiwoo, what’s wrong?” Each word laced in worry as I thought something bad must have happened.
Jiwoo slowly turned his head back to look at me, his lips quivering as he spoke. “I-Its Jihye, she...she’s gone into cold slumber,” his voice sounded desperate and weak, something which I found very strange.
This was the first time I had ever heard Jiwoo speak in such a weak voice. Something about it was causing me to be fearful for his well-being.
And cold slumber was some kind of extremely rare medical condition. I had studied a little about it out of curiosity, I didn’t knew too much regarding that illness, but I think it caused a person to go into a state of deep coma, without any semblance of recovery whatsoever.
“I don’t perfectly know what’s going, but take me with you,” I urged as he hesitantly nodded back. Leaving Jiwoo alone wasn’t the right thing to do right now. The desperate expression he had over his face, was making me worried that he might just do something to himself.
Soon afterwards, we quickly exited the inn and went to the garden which was at the back of the inn. I think Jiwoo had came to his specific place to use that skill of his which allowed him to teleport from place to place.
I had only witnessed him use it once—during the tournament—when we needed to escape the detonation of the bomb.
He held on to my hand, as he focused and allowed his skill to do its work. But the frown over his face only widened as he tried, but nothing happened. Like he was unable to use his skill.
His breathing laboured as the expression over his face turned more desperate and dark.
“Jiwoo calm down,” I said with my words soft. “First try to calm down, and then use it.”
He nodded as he took a deep breath. His grip around my hand increased—but holding it as gently as he could as I felt the warmth of his hand—,I saw tendrils of black lightning arching across his body, his hair slightly lifted, as I saw everything from in front of me darken and warp, as I felt I was being pulled into a stream or path which made my senses to go numb.
Jiwoo’s hand firmly held on to mine, as he began to looking around himself, as if searching something.
The colours from my eyes darkened as my perspective shifted and I found myself leaving the lush garden and appearing into a wide alleyway together with Jiwoo.
My head began to throb under the vertigo of suddenly shifting my location from the garden and into the alleyway, as my insides seethed for sharp moment. Jiwoo was unaffected, as he supported my body and we began to move.
We exited the alleyway and quickly made our way outside on to the streets, as I looked around and saw the familiar streets. I think we had arrived in Seoul.
“Jiwoo where are we going?” I asked.
“The central hospital, I couldn’t pin point the location using the pathways, but I think it should be close by,” he replied frantically looking around to search for the hospital.
I think we were two blocks away from it from where we were right now.
“Jiwoo, the hospital should be two block away from where we are right now, we just need to go straight until we pass the first two blocks and turn left,” just as I said, he dashed straight as I followed him from behind, trying to match his increasing pace.
He was running with everything he had. The mana inside him had surged as each step was covered with great speed than the one before. After covering the distance, we finally arrived at the hospital, as both of us entered and I heaved for breath.
Jiwoo lunged himself toward the reception desk, as he asked taking a deep snd steady breath. “Haaa...I am Seo...Jiwoo. There should be a patient named Seo Jihye admitted here. I am her brother.”
“Please let me check, Sir,” the receptionist said as she looked through the files over her pc.
“Patient Seo Jihye is in room number: 236 on the fourth floor.”
Just as the receptionist finished, Jiwoo dashed toward the elevator as the doors hummed open and we both entered. After a short ascend, we exited and Jiwoo began to look around for the room in which Jihye was.
We reached near the end of the hallway under our search, as I saw the number 236, labelled on the door two doors away from me.
I pointed at the doors letting Jiwoo know. He rushed to it and quickly opened it.
And as the door opened, the expression Jiwoo was making was something which I couldn’t come to comprehend. It was something...subtle.
He slowly walked closer to the bed on which Jihye was laid. An IV drip was attached to her forearm, as the constant light beeping of the monitor was the only thing which was indicating that she was still alive.
Her breathing was shallow—if someone was not close enough to see her, then they would have thought that she was dead. Her skin looked pale, as she just laid on the bed.
Jiwoo almost stumbled on his quick steps, as he walked closer to Jihye. His face didn’t display any emotion or expression. There were two seats placed near her bed, as he sat down on one.
Jiwoo lowered his head, as he gently grabbed Jihye’s hand and brought it close to his face. His lips trembled as he looked to be almost on the verge of tears.
Seeing Jiwoo like this made my heart to throb in pain. He looked so weak right now. Every time I had seen Jiwoo, he would allows put on a bright smile for everyone around him—to cheer up the people around him.
His broad back which had always looked as wide and warm as the sun, looked so tiny and weak right now. This was the first time I had seen Jiwoo like this. Jiwoo had always helped others, even inside the dungeon he had leaded everyone despite his own well-being in mind, but the state he was in right now...it wasn’t something which I could bare to see him in.
He had always expressed himself as someone strong in front of everyone, not allowing anyone to see this weak side of him. He never let anyone know or see the hardships he had to endure.
But the one thing which caused my heart to feel like it was being pierced by some sharp object was his expression. Jiwoo’s expression, so stoic and emotionless, was unlike anything which I had ever seen before. It was as if he had mastered the art of locking away his emotions deep within his heart.
How could someone develop such an extraordinary level of stoicism? It seemed like Jiwoo had been accustomed to situations like these, as if he had experienced them several times.
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He uttered a single word. “Sorry,” the desperation in his voice was palpable as he gazed down at his sister’s motionless body.
“I am sorry, Jihye. I am really, really sorry.” His lips quivered with each word as his sister’s hand touched his forehead. He let himself feel the warmth of her hand, as he went quiet for a long moment.
“It’s all because of me,” he blamed himself chuckling dryly, he set her hand back on the bed, but still gently gripping it, as if she could fleet and wisp away if he didn’t. “I am a curse.” He proclaimed that he was a curse, as those words were directed venomosly at himself.
No!
Every fiber of my being wanted to deny his self-deprecating words, to tell him that it wasn’t true. But I couldn’t just come to say it, as I came past a lump stuck inside my throat.
As if my words wouldn’t be enough to assure Jiwoo, that his sister would be fine.
“The people around me always have to pay the price, get hurt,” Jiwoo kept on accusing himself, gazing at Jihye. “Its true isn’t it,” he weakly turned his head in my direction, looking at me with his emotionless eyes.
I felt a shiver run down my spine, as I felt a wave of horror hit me. His eyes looked just like the time when I had seen them inside the dungeon when they had turned a shade of amethyst. As if he wasn’t capable of feeling any emotion.
I turned my gaze away from him—unable to look him in his eyes—, as he turned his head back at Jihye.
“I-I...”
“Even you and Jihoon were in a near death situation when I had met you both, and even now, when we all were trapped inside that dungeon.”
Jiwoo please! Don’t blame yourself. None of that was your fault. But those words never came, they stayed stuck inside my throat. I felt miserable.
“I was always a curse for the people around me, I always endanger the lives of those close to me.” As I listened to Jiwoo’s final words, the intensity of his emotions was palpable. It was as though he carried the deep-seated belief that he was a curse. His face, usually expressive and full of kindness, was now a mask of suppressed rage and emotionlessness.
I desperately wanted to assure Jiwoo, tell him that everything was going to be alright, but deep down, I knew that my words alone wouldn’t hold much meaning to him in this moment.
The air in the room felt heavy, as we both grappled over the weight of his statement. I wanted to reach out to him, reassure him somehow, but I couldn’t.
So I did what I could do in this moment.
I walked closer to him, feeling the weight of the moment which hung in the air. The space between us seemed to vanish as I slowly wrapped my arms around him—wrapping him in a cocoon of compassion—offering him what little comfort I could. I pressed his head into my sternum—as I felt the touch of his quivering breath over my chest—, hoping that my presence would provide solace amidst the pain raging inside him like a storm. His lips quivered as I saw the anguish etched on his face as tears began to slip down his cheeks. He silently wept, his sorrow flowing like a river of emotions that had been held back for far too long.
In that vulnerable moment, I held him tighter, trying to convey through my embrace that he was not alone in this. As I gently embraced him, I found myself patting his head, a small gesture of reassurance and compassion. Each pat was filled with unspoken words, a silent promise that I would be there for him as he had been for me, even if I couldn’t take his sorrow away or bring back Jihye.
I couldn’t change the hand fate had dealt with Jiwoo and Jihye. But in that tender moment, I knew that my role was to be a source of support for him, to be someone he could lean and rely on. I couldn’t erase his pain, but I could try to alleviate it, if only for a moment.
Seeing him in such a vulnerable state broke my heart. It just reminded me of his humanity, and his capacity to feel and to be hurt, like anyone else.
So, in this embrace, I hoped that my actions could speak louder than any words. I wanted Jiwoo to know that he didn’t have to face his pain alone, that I would be there to shoulder some of the burden for him. In that shared moment of understanding, I hoped to offer him the solace he so desperately needed.
***
Seo Jiwoo
A few days have come to pass since I found out about Jihye’s condition.
She had developed the rare condition of cold slumber, which only affected those who were just normal humans. Despite mana being a preeminent force, which was used for almost everything nowadays in our world, there were still people who couldn’t use mana, that ratio was becoming less and less as people were awaking the ability to manipulate mana. A clear example of them was Salvador or Jihye.
They could be considered normal humans, who couldn’t utilise mana, even to the bare minimum. But, cold slumber was an extremely rare condition which didn’t affect people even in a few billions. The percentage of someone having it was almost zero, yet not completely zero.
The illness makes a person vulnerable to mana, as it becomes a poison to their body, causing their nervous system to slowly stop working leading to their inevitable death.
Her sensitivity toward mana could be perfectly explained now. When she had almost collapsed inside the mall when that guard had directed only a wave of his mana at us. Or her suddenly coughing all of a sudden and passing it on as just some flu or fatigue from overworking herself.
I clenched my hands into tight fists and gritted my teeth as I looked at my sister. Each time I looked at her face, I felt the weight of my negligence bit away at my insides and heart. As the growing guilt ravaged inside me like a storm of rage, which I was barely able to supress.
It was all my fault that she had become like this.
If I had just known—!
Then what? What could I have possible been able to do. I was powerless in situations like these. Whenever I thought my life was getting better, some fiasco or terrible thing came running at my door step, come falling down like some avalanche.
And it was also my fault as well that her condition had gotten worse all of a sudden and escalated to now this. Because, I was able to manipulate mana, so my presence must have affected her almost all of the time, subconsciously even without her realising it.
And recovery from the cold slumber was impossible, because the mana slowly makes the body numb and unresponsive. Which also causes the brain activity to stop.
Just like when a person goes into a coma, their brain stops sending as active currents to allow the body to perform complex actions, this condition was similar, but was in fact more severe, and a patient’s chances of waking up and recovering were less than one percent.
Similar cases have been recorded in the past, but the people had died without ever having waking up from their slumber.
Only a miracle could allow her to recover and wake up from this condition. No, I wasn’t one to wait or rely on some kind of miracle to happen.
I only had myself to rely on.
I had looked through all of the system’s section for any herbs and potions, but there was nothing which could cure Jihye's conditions
What if I still had the potion of instant healing? I thought. That potion could have healed any condition or injury. But I had given it to Han.
I didn’t know what to do any longer. I inclined forward in my seat, holding on to Jihye’s hand as a I looked at her with my eyes soft, but the emotions within me were raging like a storm, which I was desperately trying to hold back from surging forth like an uncontained fire. But as if the world itself was looking down and laughing at me in this moment—whenever I stumbled and fell.
I felt horrible amd pathetic.
Fate was truly a cruel thing. What had Jihye done wrong for her to deserve something like this? Had my simple presence made her to end up like this. The people around me were always affected by my presence—like a curse. All of them had died, and no one was to blame for it, but me.
My fate and path were always riddled with challenges and tragedies, so much of them that now, I felt powerless—that anything I thought of, could think of, would feel useless and empty. The weight of the vows and promises I had made felt heavier than any weight I could have ever shouldered by myself.
I had promised that I would take care of her at any cost, but I now felt like those were just some empty words of reassure I had said to myself.
An anguish expression etched to my face, as my brows creased and I gently touched Jihye’s cheek with my hand, her skin felt cold to the touch. Her skin had turned pale and more colder, no longer maintaining its whiteness and warmth. Her condition was worsening as time was passing.
I couldn’t just completely stop time using acausality to allow Jihye’s condition to not deteriorate further, but the only thing I could do was find a cure to heal her.
My nails dug deep into the palm of the hands, as I clenched my teeth with more intensity and lowered my head. I was powerless. How the hell was I going to defeat the demon king—the strongest entity, the pinnacle of all power, in the entire universe—when I couldn’t even save and cure my sister?
There was—never anything—nothing in my control. But still, it doesn’t matter. I will struggle until the very end, just like in my last life.
But this time, I had a meaning to live. I had a family, new friends and people who really cared for me. That is enough reason for me to keep moving forward.
But my gaze drifted on to Jihye as I saw her pale face.
“Jihye I promise, I don’t care what I have to do—the hardships I have to go through—, I will bring back a cure for you—I am sorry, it might take me a while, but...I swear I’ll return to you, just give your idiot little brother some time,” I said with my voice determined and eyes soft.
I had also realised something in the last few days, when I had looked through the system. The window which I had seen when I was inside the basilisk dungeon, 'the hidden feature'.
It was the question mark icon which was next to the menu and shop icon. At first when I had regressed back, it was hidden back by a veil of question marks, but after clearing the basilisk dungeon the contents behind the veil had finally revealed themselves to me.
The dungeon trials.
I didn’t fully understand why it had revealed itself to me all of a sudden, but this was definitely a chance for me grow stronger and a chance for me find a cure for Jihye. The system always did everything in its power to support and help me grow by using it. I had also been given a chance to grow stronger, and at faster rates than I ever could have been able to in my past life.
And I knew the only thing I could rely and bet on was the system now. It might take us humans forever to find a cure for her condition, and time was something that I was always short on.
The interface appeared before me as I tapped over the ‘dungeon trial’ icon, and soon a translucent window popped open in front of me as it had something written over it.
____
『DOES THE HOST WISH TO INITIATE THE DUNGEON TRAILS?』
【YES】 【NO】
Note: The Host would be unable to return to his world once the trials begin, and until the Host is successfully able to clear all of the trials.
____
These dungeon trials were some kind of system challenges, like a long running quest or event. But if this opportunity could allow me to grow stronger and allow me to acquire a cure for Jihye, then I wouldn’t care leaping into the dangers of the unknown.
This was my only chance. The only hope I could grasp on to. Even if it meant risking my life, I would do it for her and the people I cared about.
I slowly stood up from my chair, as I walked closer to the door of the room. I looked behind at my sister one last time as I spoke. “I’ll be right back Jihye.”
I said as I exited the room and made my way out of hospital.
***
As I exited the portal house, I continued my stride to Headmaster Samuel’s office.
The things that needed my attention here were something necessary which needed to be taken care of before I went to the trials.
After a short stroll, I entered the familiar main building, as I quickly made my way to his office. The familiar hallways and classrooms came into my views, as I saw the warm light of the sun illuminating the inside of the building.
But right now many things were crossing my mind. Regarding the tasks I had assigned to Salvador, what I needed to do and many more things which I had put of delay for now.
But under the constant train of my thoughts, it provided me some relief as it pushed my mind away from the rage and sorrow which was again trying to control and consume me.
I didn’t wanted to return to my old ways. Where rage and revenge against the demons was the only thing left which was a reason—and drive—for my existence which pushed me forward.
But suddenly I felt like I had bumped into some kind of hard surface as I almost stumbled on my steps.
“Tsk, can’t you look where you are going?” A voice grumbled from beside me.
Breaking away from my constant train of thoughts, I realised I had bumped into someone. I steadied my footing and apologised before stepping away.
“I am sorry.”
But a firm hand stopped me as the person from before gripped hard on my shoulder.
I looked above my shoulder and behind me. As I saw a youth with sharp features with blonde hair with highlights of brown mixed together with the bright blonde. His brown eyes glared at me as a wide scowl
was palpably visible over his face.
“Is that how you apologise to someone after bumping into them?” He grumbled as I whipped his arm away with little strength.
I took a deep breath as I spoke with a tense voice.
“I am very sorry that I bumped into you,” I almost sighed hearing the arrogance in his words. “I need to be somewhere, so I will be taking my leave now.”
“Where the hell do you think you are going?” The youth grumbled as he released a light wave of his mana which was directed at me, as his eyes began to gleam. His strength and rank was equal to a
“Do you even know who I am?”
I sighed with a nonchalantly expression over my face. “Am I supposed to know? Do I look like I am interested in learning every passers-by persons name?” I said with my face emotionless and eyes solemn. I already had several damn things on my mind and now I had to deal with some spoiled brat.
“I’ll have you know that my name is Roy Kaiser, from the prestigious Kaiser family in Germany!” He said with annoyance in his voice over my remark. “It seems like teaching you a lesson over respect for an instructor is needed. I guess your parents didn’t do a very good job at raising a squirt like you.”
The intensity of his mana increased making the air around us to get heavier. I saw some students chock on their breath as they held on to their throats as their face turned pale. There were some second year and third year students amongst the crowd which had appeared around us.
“And judging from your mana, you are simply an
My face turned solemn, as I fought back with my mana. Some of the students dropped unconscious on the floor, as our pressures clashed making our surroundings oppressive—hard to breath for the others. I increased the output of my mana as Roy flinched a step back, as a frown crept up his face.
I further increased the amount as a twisted grin arched up my face, as I saw student after student fall to the floor. Roy Kaiser’s knees buckled as he went to one knee, as his breathing laboured profusely and he heaved for breath. The students—from each years—were greatly affected by my released pressure.
I had already overpowered his sorry for an attempt to oppress me with his mana. His mana slowly withered away in a weak pulse as he looked at him with surprised and dumbfounded eyes. I had released the supposed limiter I always placed over my body to supress my mana to make myself look weak. But was there a need to do that anymore!
Why did I need to hide my strength anymore? Strength and power always spoke far better than any ethical words. Every person with authority in the world had the strength to back up their claims—if they didn’t they would simply be crushed and be brushed away like a twig—, and to crush their enemies and opposing parties entirely. All I needed to do was to crush my enemies entirely too. That's it, I just needed to either humiliate them—to not allow them to walk on the face of this earth—or just kill them. My arm was inching closer to his throat, as I felt my mind clouded with rage. The intensity in the air kept on increasing, as my mana kept surging out of me like a constant stream, as I saw the air around me ruffle and ripple. I saw the horrified expressions on the faces of the students. I couldn’t care less about them! I thought, my eyes emotionlessly boring down at the pitiful man whom had so unfortunately crossed paths with me. He shivered up as he shuttered another step back.
“What’s going on over here?” I heard a stern voice coming from behind me, which I had recognised quickly. I looked above my shoulder as I withdrew the pressure and my arm back and the students finally took a deep breath of relief—coughing several times as they did. They turned to look at me, as if I was some kind of monster, their eyes filled with fear, shock, awe and horror.
I closed my eyes, as I allowed my rage to subside. The impulse was growing within me like a wild fire. For an instance, I had allowed my anger to control me.
“Jiwoo what’s going on here?” Adam asked, as his eyes drifted from me to Roy. His brows were knitted as he formed an answer inside his mind without any explanation, witnessing the scene in front of him.
He deeply sighed as he turned his head toward me and spoke. “Come with me.”
“W-Wait—” Adam looked above his shoulder as he heard Roy’s voice from behind him. The youth took a stumbling step forward as anger rushed to his face.
With a twisted scowl he spoke. “That bastard—!”
“I think its around time for you to be in class and helping Instructor Swen, Assistant Instructor Roy Kaiser.” Adam’s words hanged heavy in the air, as whatever complaint Roy was about make stayed lodged inside his throat, as he deeply frowned. Adam’s face was as solemn and poise as usual as he looked at the youth, not giving a single care to whatever he had to say. “I’ll hear your side of the story later.”
Looking at me with a deep contempt in his eyes Roy clicked his tongue, twirled and walked away, cursing inaudibly under his breath.
“And you,” Adam sternly said, but sighed as he met my gaze—he pinched the middle of his brows—, then twirled around as he stepped forward in the wide hallway. “Follow me.”
I did as he said and began to follow him from behind as the fleeting gazes of the students lying on the floor drifted away from me as I looked at them.