It's begging of the summer after of my last year of college its  been so hard on me ,specialty that i have some issues, well to be bland i have some anger issues i don't know what its cause or why i have it , i went to some doctors and the do the gave me some medicine and one of them treat me like a crazy person, well , i stopped going to them after that i began to have my rage attacks and yes its like panic attacks,

It began last year of middle school after me and my gang went with some other boys to have a break in one of the pc cafes one this boys want to get some attention then he chose a target for sweet littel bullying and i have lot it scince i am quite tall, hell no i am too tall for my age but i am also not muscular no so skiny but have vibe of same palm tries with long skin armes and good tall legs giraffe-like neck so that boys began his jokes on my appearance with that i may have some tall syndromes that make people stupid, my friends began to go with the wave tell some bland joke about me too in that day felt some unbelievable rage inside me but i kept a smile on my face .

After i went home i lose control of my rage begging to destroy anything in my way i even broke my arm in that day ,after this event i begin to ge get angry so quickly on things i did find not worse it but i can't help it after 3 months i enter my second rampage in home by keeping my rage inside for that time my parent get worried so they began pressure me to go to doctor thought i did with help of medicine i didn't do any rampage , then my first year in high school with new people and new friends because i thought they may be the reason for my rage ,but that not good decision i make because with no gang around me cover for me , i become target for heavy bullying and the i enter my first fight and that day felt my rage my angry became a person that lead the fight that win with my body bec i can hit from a very large distance without getting hit and felt weird satisfaction after i broke some bone rib cage of my enemies that day and i identified that i have demon in me .

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Me and my demon spent three years of fighting bullying people but i somehow kept my demon under control from letting him do anything bad or anything i will regret later but i become angry all time my rage increased a lot for any simple reason like getting bored from class or hearing noise while tried or talking to people in any way but i don't let this demon of rage control me i fight with all my will, I don't know why that and surrender to it and became an abusive person with constant rage but kept fighting it .

 in my years of college i finally i find a way to decrease my rage make my demon alot quite with simply i go to bars or cafe and find any person that seems don't care and begin to talk to him with my problem and they do the same most of the people i talk to was old people or middle-aged ones after some time i became popular for that in bars and cafe i visit weekly to help in keeping my demon in check, but recently i began in losing control nothing seems to work and also i became tired of it its like two people fight in your mind consciously with no reason here i am on verge to lose it i want to vent it out.

 my eyes then fall on a girl at the same age of mine but she seems lost in her world with sad beautiful eyes with her in my view i remember why i don't have a girlfriend or have any sexual experience because when this thought came to my mind my demon like it alot form that what happens if i lose control someday and wen t to rape someone i have lot of problem with rage alone i don't my demon to taste the lust that will make me a monster if i lose it and i am realy losing it .

But when I saw her I don't know why but I go to her and say:” do u mind if sit and talk with them for a bit even if u don't listen to me that fine “