Have I regretted many things in my life?

No, not really.

Of course I could tell you of the commonplace: "I should have confessed.", the: "Had I just tried in earnest.", or: "If I had stopped them.", and so on and so forth.

Yeah, I have the one or other regret in my life, who doesn't?! You wouldn't be called a human anymore at that point.

Imagine, your life must have gone perfect for you to have never regretted a single, most minute thing. Like, goddamn! Maybe you bit into that hotpocket too quickly and now you got burned gums, or whatever the fuck! You get the point, right?

We regret. It's natural. It's a part of us, and it's a part of us because we aren't perfect, we can't be. It would be dope though.

I mean, who wouldn't want to do zero mistakes in his life? To forsee and predict tomorrow, the day after, the day thereafter, and thereafter and boom, you got yourself set. Cute girl, even cuter kids. A nice house, a job almost tailored to your tastes - or maybe you just went the lottery route, I don't judge. - and a ton of friends that would go through hell and back with you.

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The thing I regret the most?

Ah fuck man, it's DYING!

Plain and simple.

It sucks donkey balls! Just grab one of them salty mofos and give it a good 'ol succ and you can bet your ass that's death right there.

Enough with the sanguinary language. But for real tho. It's bad. Real bad.

Dying?

No, not the death part of dying, got you confused there didn't I?

No, it's what comes after your tranquil ego gets vortexed and - just one last time - ultra-succed into the beyond and thrown to the metaphorical garbage dumps of the cosmos.

You think swords and magic is rad and low-key bangers, no, it fucking isn't. When a stray spell cast by a pompous shit for brains of a brat zooms over your head and disintegrates a handful of your people you know this ain't a happy place. Hell, beasts roam these worlds that would make love to a tank and fucking enjoy it!

And the swords man, cursed or blessed, all the same shit, both hurt like absolute hell when they scratch you, and all the blood... I didn't flunk medical school because it was so difficult - maybe I did, but that only amounts for 20% of my reason... maybe 30%? Ok, 50%... You got me! 80%... *cough* 99% *cough*

The only solace you have is the knowledge that one day, one far-off day in the future, you will pay these fuckers back. Ten-fold. And Lord allmighty does it feel GOOD!!!

Now you are probably curious... Let's get to it then, shall we?