WARNING: THIS STORY CONTAINS SMALL MENTIONS OF SELF HARM AND SUICIDE. VIEWER DISCRETION IS ADVISED

[THIS IS A VIABLE MISSION TO [REDACTED] WE'RE TRAVELLING TO [REDACTED] AGAIN. HOLD ON TO YOUR SEATBELTS, WE ARE ABOUT TO TAKE OFF]

May 15 2012

So...I'm on another NASA mission again haha. I'm thrilled to be here again even though I have been working here for several years now. Still, every time I'm in the space station it feels like the first mission - yet funnily enough - still feels like home. It's a strange feeling but I like being here more than being on Earth. It's much more freeing? I don't know how to explain it to be honest. I don't feel alone thank God. I wouldn't know what to do with myself if being on one of these missions made me feel that way. I, of course, miss Rachel the most but I know that I'm still going to be sending her letters and telling her how much I love her. Plus I have Jaxon here to give me a raging headache. Still, I could do without having anyone I know surrounding me. I could literally be alone in space by myself and I wouldn't feel alone. It's calming yet exhilarating. Anyways, I feel exhausted for some reason, maybe it's because of that training that continues to kick my ass before I come here.

May 15 2012 A few hours later

Everything is much more easy going than the previous missions - well the only thing that sticks out is Captain Richard's booming voice haha, but I wouldn't say that wasn't easygoing, just normal at this point. Let's see what did I do so far today? I played some card games, won bingo against some of my crewmates, Jaxon got pissed off about it lol, put some of that amazing shampoo on my hair...really nothing. Like I said, way more easy going than before, but that's only because everyone is not focused on different tasks this time. Just getting to the portals again. The portals are interesting and I'm hoping they are not closed like last time, such a weird and annoying hurdle we had to overcome. Everyone seems excited and intrigued nonetheless. I'm just flabbergasted by the fact that they are so close to earth. Like, we will literally be there in an hour or so.

May 16 2012

Where do I even begin.. So many events happened yesterday and I need to gather my thoughts. I can still feel the awe hanging in the air. So, when we got to the portals we were each tasked to go in each one. Everyone had to pick which one we wanted to go inside of. I chose to enter one where the land, and the sky looked just like a printed black and white photo. It was absolutely like nothing we'd ever seen before and just from looking at the outside I could tell it was going to be an experience. And it was.

When I went inside of there I felt this...eerie sense of calmness and silence. It felt like I went to sleep but I was still awake. I kept walking. Where? I didn't know. I had no idea where I was going, it was just this vast area. Then I came across some buildings that were all different shades of gray. When walking closer I saw that there was a diner of some sort so I went inside. There were people standing around in there and they all looked at me with surprised faces. One of the women quickly grabbed my arm and put a finger to her lips basically telling me to be quiet and I was feeling very confused by this point. I turned around and noticed that everyone was still staring at me. I was super freaked out but amazed especially at the fact that these people didn't even have colors to their clothes or faces! They were either very dark or very light, no in between. And they looked just like regular people but they just didn't have the colors that we have. I mean, they are regular people but it didn't seem that way until we started communicating. The lady grabbed a piece of paper and started writing and with that, we went back and forth talking to each other just using that pencil. They told me there was a monster living there and they couldn't speak. A freaking monster. I got to know some of the people specifically in the diner but most people were afraid to talk to me, and rightfully so. I got to know a man who looked like he would have a country accent and a woman who seemed to be unhinged. She kept pacing back and forth and pulling her hair. The man, who was named Earl, told me he would tell me more about everything later when I came back because the timer on my suit went off. So now I'm back here.

Overall, I can't believe what happened. It's probably the coolest thing that will ever happen to me in my lifetime. I seriously doubt anything can top this. Let's see, yeah the other portals. Damien came back out and reported to us about the portal, and he said all he saw was just a silent cave. An endless silent cave. What are the odds seriously? A portal full of nothing? Everyone had a good laugh at that. Another portal consisted of what looked like Greece? Charlie said there were a large amount of burly men fighting and it looked straight out of a painting. One of the other interesting ones were the Paris Catacombs and another with hundreds of hunched over creatures running around. I wish I could say I was joking but I'm not. They described them looking like what Wendigos are supposed to look like. So...all in all, we're going to be going through the portals over a course of a few weeks and taking notes. We tried taking pictures but the cameras didn't work for some reason which is a bumber. Well Anyways, I'm exhausted and typed myself up a storm.

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May 19 2012

The past few days have been somewhat hectic. We've still been going to the portals and taking notes when we come out and honestly? I look forward to going to the specific portal I was assigned to. The people at the diner are interesting and I enjoy talking to them - or writing that is. I've been wanting to learn more about the monster that the town mentioned before, and thankfully Earl wanted to speak to me again. It's astounding how normal yet abnormal Earl seems with his huge stomach and thick mustache. You would swear he came out of a storybook about a farmer. That's why it makes me feel a bit safer talking to him because he seems so familiar.

I'm just trying to wrap my mind around the things he told me. Him writing that some people in the town call the monster the druid because it looks like an oak tree? It doesn't even seem real. Then Alice, joins our conversation again and writes that when night comes everyone has to sleep or their ears and eyes will bleed, and that they will gouge out their own eyes from the sound of its screams. I told the crew what I discovered and they all seemed shooken up and rightfully so. Still, I felt grounded talking to Jaxon about it, everything felt more real and he helped ease up the disbelief with jokes. I just...sort of want to see what the monster looks like and it's been on my mind all night. I'm just extremely curious at this point. I know that it's wrong because I could very well die, I mean, of course I wouldn't want to die but I just have this urge to go see it. It's a once in a lifetime thing and I can't mess up this chance. I'm just hoping I can discover more about this place before it's time to leave. I asked the people in the diner if they would tell me more information when I came back and they agreed to, so hopefully they really will and won't flake out on me.

May 21 2012

GRRR The portals keep messing up (-᷅_-᷄) They've been messing up for a few days now. It's pretty saddening. I was really wondering if I would get more information before we left but it doesn't look like that is going to happen anymore. I mean, my portal is still working so maybe I can convince them tomorrow to let me go back at least one more time. I think it would be interesting to see what Earl wanted to tell me and get some good notes in. Plus everyone will see me as a good colleague if I put enough good information in my notes, so why not?

(Silence fills the air)

.....

"Why..did you let him.. go there."

....

"We didn't want him to Jaxson... he chose to. There was nothing-

"YOU STILL ALLOWED HIM TO!"

"You didn't speak up, or say anything either, is that not true? So why don't you think about that before pointing fingers."

(The sound of a chair creaking)

(Another chair creaks afterwards)

"Okay that's enough. Sit down"

.......

(Shuffling)

(Chair creaks again)

"Like Richard said, there's nothing we can do about this. This is a tragedy that took us all by surprise. None of us knew what would happen and none of us wanted this to happen but what we can do moving forward, is celebrate the achievements Austin made while he was alive. That's all we can do."

....

(Chair creaks again followed by footsteps)

(Fading out)

"Well.... he's gone."

"Yep."

......

________

More footsteps fade out, collectively, slow shuffling, until days pass, until days push down the memory of Austin.

Find out what happened before Austin met his tragic fate