Part 6
“AAuuugh!!”
“You are doing great, Miss Lily!”
“Alright, push!”
“Aaaurrgghhhhh!”
“I can see the head!”
Livia cowers further into the closet she had been hiding in for the past two hours and pushes her small hands further into her ears, trying to block out the screams of the stranger as she lets out a small whimper.
Why did she think it would be a good idea to surprise the stranger!? She should have never left the old nanny! Now she was stuck listening to the stranger die!!
Livia didn’t understand why anyone wasn’t doing anything further to help the stranger!
When the group of women surrounding Lily had suddenly rushed into the room, Livia had been really curious. To the point that she almost revealed herself too early. But then everyone started moving a lot and shouting as they helped Lily to the bed. That is when Livia had noticed that the stranger had peed herself! Like a baby! Livia wasn’t a baby anymore. Even she had known that you only peed in the restroom!
But soon after she had made the discovery, her little nose wrinkled up, the stranger had clutched at her stomach and started screaming.
And it has not stopped since.
Livia didn’t understand! Couldn’t the servants see that the stranger was suffering greatly?
Why didn’t they help her!?
As another scream launched itself into the air, Livia uncurls slightly when she hears loud murmurs of encouragement, practically right on top of each other.
“You are doing well, Miss Lily!”
“One great push and the worst of it will be past!”
“Come on, Miss Lily, you can do it. Push now!”
All they kept saying was push and push, but why? Livia shuffles closer to the open door to get a better view, her never-ending curiosity finally winning out.
“Auuugh! Fucking hell! Get this thing out of me!” The stranger bawls, sobbing. Her face was very red and very sweaty. Her white hair was damp and clings wetly to her face as her expression twisted into a deep grimace.
It was really gross and unseem-...unseeminl-
It was just gross.
And it seemed really painful.
Livia didn’t know whether to cringe back further into the closest or to continue watching with wide purple eyes.
Was the stranger going to die?
It seemed like she was, but Livia recognized the servants by her side. It was the same woman who had always looked after her mother in the past. When her belly had been a bit round.
But that didn’t really bring her any comfort.
After all, her mother did not get better. If anything, she has gotten worse. Her mother was sicker than ever.
Livia ends up retreating further into the closet when another yell pierces the air and ring in her ears. She curls up in the dark and starts rocking herself as she once again covers her ears.
She doesn’t know how long she stays in that position, as somehow, despite all the noise and her own distress, she manages to fall asleep. Livia is only startled awake from the loud commotion happening in the room.
She blinks her itchy eyes slowly, confused as to why she wasn’t in her own bed. Then a high pitch, shrieking cry has her sitting up straight, surprised.
She knew that cry!
It was the same way her youngest cousin cried; it was a wail of a baby.
Suddenly very alert, Livia scrambles to the opening of the closet. When she peeks through the small opening, she sees the servant who had looked after her mother holding up a small wiggling mass of limbs in a soft blanket.
Lily moved sluggishly on the bed and raises her shaking arms. Around her, the maids were cleaning her up, carefully changing the covers, and rushing in and out of the room like very busy ants.
“W-what are they?” The stranger asks with a croak.
“It is a girl, Miss Lily,” The old woman holding the baby says. She moves around the bed, clearly intending to hand the baby over, but then the blanket shifts and she looks down.
“Oh, greatest goddess! This is!” The old woman stops dead, staring at the baby in her arms in alarm. Then she looks up at the stranger then back down to the baby, her expression closing off.
“What is it? What is wrong?” Lily asks instantly, struggling to sit up.
“This birthmark...” The old woman says, and then she trails off.
Lily stills at the words, her expression frozen. So do all the bustling maids in the room.
“Mark?” One maid asks, confused.
“No, it couldn’t be,” Another one says, paling.
“But I had thought it was just a bastard,” The one still standing beside the bed says in a whisper.
“It still is,” The oldest maid in the room hisses, “But it is not just anyones.”
As one, all the maids turn to stare at the stranger. Livia does not pay attention to the look on their faces, or how Lily seems to shrink and shiver on the bed as her hands fall limply to her side.
Instead, she scoots away from the doors of the closet, her brow scrunching up. Basturd. She did not know the meaning of that word. She had once tried asking her old nanny and even the one that gives her candy, but they both refused to tell her and even scolded her for saying it.
But she did know what a birthmark was! Because she had one! A very pretty one!
Livia's small fingers reach up to pats at the small space behind her right ear. Then she pouts when she realizes she can’t see it without a mirror. But still, the small mark was slightly raised and she can trace it out with her fingers.
It was a bud of a rose. Oval in shape with small little petals hugging each other closely. Livia knew it was a faint but distinct color of grey that blends almost too well into her skin. Making it almost invisible.
But even so, it was still there! It was proof of her legi-...legitm-...It was proof that she was her father’s daughter! Her mother had always loved to play with the mark and even helped Livia look at it through a mirror.
“Listen well, my little Livia,” Her mother had crooned softly, “This is not just any ordinary mark of birth. It is an extremely rare occurrence in which only a few human lineages have in the whole of Ethetia. It is a birthmark embedded with magic, and as you grow, so will it along with you.”
“Why?” Livia had asked as she turned away from admiring the bud in the mirror.
“Because nature made it so,” Her mother had replied with a doting smile.
“Why?” Livia had asked again, still not understanding but really wanting to.
“Because your father comes from a long old line of magic users. Back before even the kingdom of Wisteria had been established,” Her mother had replied, only confusing Livia further.
The young miss had continued to question her mother, but she forgot most of the answers because they were long and were made up of words that she hadn’t understand. All the same, she had kept her attention on her mother and bobbed her head along to the explanation despite not really comprehending it.
Livia did know that the mark behind her ear was very important though.
Her father had one. She knew because the scarce moment she was in his arms, she always took the opportunity to pull back his ear to see the fully bloomed rose behind it. It was darker than her own and bigger too. But mostly, it was just super pretty and she could not wait until hers look the same.
So, why were the servants making such a big deal about a birthmark? Livia pouts and kicks her feet, knocking over some stuff when she does so. It is a chain effect. Her mouth drops open when the small clamor of clothes falling is heard in the dead silence of the room outside the closet and her head is covered by a heavy dress.
She struggles under the dress for a moment. When Livia finally manages to pull it off her head, the closet door is open and a maid stands in the doorway.
“Miss Livia!?” The maid gasps.
Livia ignores her. Her hair blue hair tie had come undone! She tries to fix it with her clumsy fingers but only manages to pull it out altogether.
Noo!
Her mother gave her this! She needed to put it back! She wanted it back in her hair! NOW!
“Give me my child,” The stranger suddenly hisses out in the room.
Livia blinks. Oh right. The baby! Then she winces. Why was it still crying? Shouldn’t it be silent by now?
Then another thought stomps through her head.
Wait.
Where did the baby come from?
“Where did the baby come from?” Livia asks the maid standing before her and points at the squalling bundle with the hand still clutched at her blue hair tie.
“Of course, my apologies, Miss Lily,” The old woman says, handing off the baby to Lily. Then she casts a sharp glance around the room, with that look alone the room springs back in action. The old woman soon returns to the foot of the bed and light blue magic sparks to life, encasing the stranger on the bed as other servants attend to her as well.
“There is still the placenta left and a bit more bleeding than usual. I will slow it down with my magic, and hopefully, it clots and stops altogether. After, we will need to stitch up this bit,” The old woman went on to say some more stuff, but Livia wasn’t paying attention.
Livia evades the maid's hands reaching for her and crawls underneath her skirt. She ignores the maid squeal and surveys the room in curiosity. It was small, much smaller than her own, and it didn’t even have a balcony!
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“Miss Livia!”
“Miss Livia!? Where did she come from?”
“Suprise!” Livia says, extremely delayed as she throws her hands up.
“You can’t be here.”
“How long has she been here?”
“Had she been hiding in the closet the whole time!?”
“Miss Livia, come this way. Let’s leave this scary place, alright? I’m sure you must have been so confused.”
“Just what are those nannies of hers doing? Isn’t this like the third time this week?”
Three maids surround her. Once again, hands reach out to pick her up, but Livia is small, and she easily evades them by once more crawling underneath their skirts. The moment she does, she trots over to the bed and instantly begins to climb onto it. Absently, she notices that there are no longer a lot of people surrounding it and the stranger isn’t red or sweaty in the face.
“Where did the baby come from?” The toddler asks upon sitting down on the bed, blinking round purple eyes at the startled face of the strangers. Her words come out are yelled because the baby is still screaming and squirming. And this close, Livia can tell that it is super small. Like, super small. She has dolls much bigger than the baby.
“Miss Livia...?” The Lily says at the same time she begins to rock the bundle in her arms.
“Why were you screaming a lot? It made my ears hurt!” Livia complains in a whiny voice, shuffling closer.
“Miss, I suggest you feed the newborn soon,” The old woman says, suddenly appearing beside the bed.
The stranger drags her red eyes away from Livia and glances down at the bundle. Then she continues to stare, and stare, her mouth falling open slightly.
“Where did the baby come from?” Livia asks, directing her question to the old woman since Lily did not answer in a timely manner.
“From Miss Lily, Miss Livia,” The old woman answers her.
“What?” Livia asks, not understanding, “How? Why?” She questions further.
But she isn’t answered as the old woman shuffles closer to the stranger and begins to fuss over her, “This way, Miss Lily, just let her latch on. Exactly. Just like that.”
Livia watches the scene before her in confusion.
That was strange. Why was Lily feeding the baby? Only nannies feed babies! Lily wasn’t a nanny! And she was doing it in for everyone to see! It was wrong! It was unseeml-...unseengl-It was wrong!
“You aren’t a nanny,” Livia points out, pointing.
The stranger does not lift her head. Her attention seems to be only for the baby cradled in her arms. Livia crosses her own and pouts.
She was being ignored! How dare the stranger ignores her! Just as she was about to move closer and tug at the stranger's sleeve, the door to the room suddenly bursts open.
“How long do you intend to have me wait for news? Why has it become so quiet? What has happened?” Her father demands upon entry.
The old woman immediately moves towards him, stepping in front of him to block his view, “My lord, I apologize. The miss has just finished giving birth. We are still in the middle of cleaning up. Please, this sight is not appropriate for you to view. Please, let us leave the room and let the maids finish their work.”
“How is Lily? Is she well?” Her father asks as he turns his sight to the bed.
“My lord, she will recover. I have already finished healing her to the best of my abilities. Now, we must leave her to recovery the rest of her energy herself,” The old woman says while directing her father out the door.
Just before the door closes, Livia sees the old woman lean in close to her father with a pinched expression, saying, “My lord, there is something else you must know...”
Livia looks down at the covers with a frown. Her father hadn’t even noticed she was there. Just like the stranger, he seemed to only have eyes for the bundle in her arms.
Suddenly feeling dejected and angry, Livia climbs off the bed and leaves the room all by herself. She pointedly keeps her back to the bed, no longer interested in the baby that appeared from Lily, and slams the door close behind her. A second later, a muffled wail is heard.
Livia just huffs and stomps away.
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“The bastard has been fathered by Lord Valentine!?” The candy nanny hisses by the crackling fire.
It was late at night and Livia wakes up at the sound of her voice. After her nannies had finally caught up to her after she escaped the stranger's room, she had been scolded severely by the old, grumpy nanny and sent straight to her room. She has been imprisoned since. And now it was nighttime and her nannies were once again talking while they thought she was asleep. This time, a maid has joined them. The one who usually cleans her room.
Livia realizes she had been the same made who had found her in the closet, earlier in the day.
“It is true,” The maid says in a low whisper, her eyes darting around the room as she leans forward.
Livia shuffles further under the covers, keeping her eyes close when she feels eyes linger over her. Once they are gone, she strains her ears to hear more. Despite declaring herself uninterested in the newborn baby, she in fact, still was.
“B-but it is a bastard. Miss Lily is clearly unwed...does that mean the lord had gotten her pregnant? Outside of wedlock? It cannot be so! It must be some mistake! That mistress has clearly said that the baby was not the lords!” The young nanny says frantically, looking visibly upset.
“It has been proven true. I saw the birthmark myself,” The maid says.
“The one of the blooming rose?” The candy nanny gasps.
“Just a tiny little bud, right behind her right ear,” The maid confirms with a serious look. She crosses her arms and shakes her head, “It is just like Miss Livia’s, only, the bastard’s is even darker, more prominent like the lord.”
“So what?” The candy nanny scoffs, “All that means is that she will have competent magical abilities. That does not make her any less of a bastard.”
“Of course, it doesn’t,” The maid says, also scoffing.
“First the lord brought his mistress here. Then our lady miscarried the male heir, and now you are saying the child the mistress had been carrying was in fact the lords all along!? This is all just too tragic. I can barely bear it all,” The young nanny weeps.
“At least the baby was not a son,” The candy nanny says in comfort as she pats at the young nanny’s back.
“That is a meager saving grace,” The maid seethes, “You lot had not been there when the lady had begun to lose the child. The look of devastation on her face...how could the lord put her through this?”
“He is as savage and greedy as his ancestors,” The candy nanny hisses.
“Shut your mouth this instance!” The croaky voice of the old nanny pipes up instantly, “You do not speak of such things here.”
“Now she speaks,” The candy nanny mocks, “And still, in the defense of the lord. Do you not have any sympathies for the lady of the estate?”
“Of course, I do,” The old nanny says, “What she has gone through is just awful, but do not forget you live under the roof and rule of Lord Valentine. Do not mistake his cold and detached disposition for one who would not see you flogged and without a job in an instant!”
The words drop the room into a tomb of silence.
Livia yawns and snuggles into her pillow, blinking slowly. She still didn’t really know what basturd meant, but she did understand it was something to be ashamed of. But what does flogged mean? It sounded like a punishment. Was that the same as getting a smack on the wrist? Livia hated when the old nanny hit her. It never really hurt, but it was really irritating. Especially when it was done in front of the other servants.
Livia really didn’t like the old nanny very much.
But her mother had told Livia to obey her, so she didn’t have a choice but to. She had to be good for the sake of her mother. Because Livia understands now.
Her father had done something bad.
When he brought the stranger to their home, everything changed.
No one is happy about the stranger being here. Not the maids. Not the butlers. Not her nannies, and especially not her mother and grandmother.
The stranger made her mother sick. The stranger made her grandmother angry.
If only the stranger never came.
Livia wished she would just disappear, then everything would go back to normal.
...right?
________________________________________
“What is her name?” Lord Luvien asks softly from his seated position by her bedside.
Lily stares down at the small babe sleeping peacefully in her arms and remains silent. She tucks the blankets down so she could better view the small round face, admiring the soft, white downy hair and the barely visible eyebrows. From the coloring alone, the newborn seemed to be a small copy of herself.
If only she had not been given his mark. If only the old midwife hadn’t seen. Then Lily could have...
Her daughter moves a bit in her arms, her pink little mouth pouting then smiling before it softens again in her sleep.
Lily rocks her gently, the weight in her arms surprisingly hefty, real. To think the squirming mass inside her that had kicked at her bladder and organ it could reach would turn out this small. This delicate. It seems disproportionate.
“Lily...” Lord Luvien eyes attempt to burn a hole in the side of her face, “Lily...why didn’t you tell me?”
“Because I had not wanted you to know,” Lily answers honestly, gently, her attention still on her daughter.
“...why not?” She could easily hear the weight in his words, the frustration and anger that was barely contained. Even after so many years, the boy she once had teased relentlessly could still be found in the man standing before her today. He was still high strung and too serious for his own good, but if you know what to listen for.
“Because it would not have made a difference,” Lily says bluntly, finally looking up, “This child is your, my lord. I will not deny it. By now, everyone in your household likely knows it, but, even so, that does not change how she came about.”
It had happened over nine months ago. He had been attending to matters on the outskirts of his land and she had been traveling through. They happened to notice the other by pure accident. From there, they had decided to cut out a small portion of their busy day to catch up in a tavern.
One drink had led to another and well...
Lily hadn’t intended to sleep with him. She had not wished to become that sort of woman. But as they had drunk, their tongues had gotten looser and they had begun to relax in each other's presence, and let down their guards.
For once in what had felt like forever, the two of them reverted back and traveled to the past, back when expectations and dreams were something to think lightly of. They admitted things to each other they would have never admitted to anyone else. It had been a very intimate moment and it only seemed right in their clouded judgment to take it a step further.
Lily had left early in the morning, unable to look upon him in the face after the act. Luvien wasn’t just anyone after all. He was a lord of very high standing with a wife and child. And Lily, well, she had just been his old friend from school.
That night should have never happened.
It had been a mistake.
Soon after, Lily found out she was pregnant. It was as if the great goddess herself had deemed to scold her for her selfish actions.
Lily had intended to keep the matter to herself. To keep mum about it, but then she fell sick during her late-stage and knew it could be very dangerous for the baby and herself. She tried seeking out the help of doctors and healers, but she had no means to pay them properly. Finally, after swallowing her own pride, she had contacted Lord Luvien. But still, she had held onto the truth and told the father of her child that the baby wasn’t his.
For his sake, his family, and her own.
But then her daughter had been born with his mark. How could she forget about his mark?
“It does not matter how she was conceived,” Lord Luvien tells her, “All that matters is that she is my daughter.”
“And what of your other daughter?” Lily asks dispassionately, “What about your wife? My lord, you may be keen to forget their existence at times, but I am not.”
Anyone besides the two of them would hear the words as a challenge. They would misunderstand and think she is asking for more without saying it outwardly.
Lord Luvien mouth presses into a thin line, displeased that she even brought them up while it was just the two of them, alone in the privacy of her room.
“I will care for them,” He says after a while, “As is my duty.”
Lily laughs hollowly, “It always comes back around to that, doesn’t it? Your duty?”
Lord Luvien is stubborn though. He leans forward and places a hand over her, squeezing it with a serious look in his beautiful but keen eyes, “I will not abandon you, Lily. You and our daughter will be taken care of. Just as you have been these pays two months.”
But Lily was already shaking her head, a sad smile on her lips, “I did not come here to become your mistress, Luvien,” she says bluntly, almost chidingly.
“You have just given birth. The midwife said you will still need time to recovery,” he says in reply, not easily swayed, but also not saying what he really wants to.
“I am well aware of that,” Lily tells him, shifting slightly and grimacing. Her baby was steadily becoming heavier in her arms, but she stubbornly held her close, waiting.
“What will you name her,” Lord Luvien asks again, his purple eyes level with her pretty red ones.
Lily looks down at her daughter, a second past, but no name comes to mind.
“Later,” She says, looking back up with a shadow of a smile, “It does not need to be known right this minute, does it?”
“No, of course not,” Lord Luvien agrees, settling back and pulling his hand away.
Lily pretends that she does not miss the warmth of it and settles heavily into her pillows, sighing. They were at another stalemate. It was always like this, between the two of them, always hitting the same wall, never getting anywhere.
Something had to change.
Because if not, at this rate, she would...
Lily didn’t even want to think about it. Couldn’t. It was nothing but wishful thinking. A silly fantasy of a girl long gone.
“Livia was here,” she says, suddenly remembering.
Lord Luvien blinks blankly at her, “Was she?”
Lily laughs as the blurry memory clears up, nodding, “She was. She popped out of the closet, ran under some maids' dresses, and shouted ‘surprise!’. That child, honestly. She is so tiny but filled with so much chaotic energy. She isn’t at all as I expected. I mean, yes, she is clearly spoiled, but even so, she is endlessly entertaining.”
“Hmm,” Lord Luvien hums, staring.
Lily suddenly turns to him, her smile dropping, “Why don’t you spend more time with her? She clearly takes after you as much as she does her mother. She is so smart. A little too smart. I would be so pleased to have a child-like her.”
“You do have a child now,” Lord Luvien says in reply, his eyes falling to the snuffling bundle, “Our daughter.”
Lily blinks at him, her reaction a little delayed before she also looks down, her smile reappears on her face, but...
Lord Luvien frowns when a second goes by, then another as their newborn daughter's face scrunches up in distress in her mother's arms, her small pudgy arms beginning to wave in the air.
“Lily?” He calls out.
Lily startles a bit, her body flinching, but before he can say anything about her reaction, she pulls their daughter close with a soft gentle smile and begins to coo and rock her as he had thought she would.
“Our daughter,” Lily echoes before she begins to hum a soft tune.
Lord Luvien stares at her a second longer, but her expression remains as it always had been. Maybe he had only imagined it. His worries are put to complete rest when Lily turns and offers up their daughter for him to hold for the first time.
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Two days later, Lily Mildrop disappears from the Valentine Estate without a trace. The only thing left of her two-month stay at the Valentine Estate was the daughter she gave birth to and a small pendant of a red and white lily clutched in the palm of her newborn daughter's hand.