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The Mansion in the Woods
Chapter Thirteen: Kobold Formalities

Chapter Thirteen: Kobold Formalities

A Kobold Guard pushed both Sanguilia and Ab'li into the main hall of the fort, where the Maester and the Circle resided. Sanguilia probed her memory, and recalled that the Maester was a position of practical power, not associated with combat ability, physical prowess, magical affinity or bloodline, but instead was given to the Kobold who would be the most capable of running the Hold in its entirety. It was comparable to a human administrator combined with the absolute authority of a king. The Circle consisted of the eldest, and therefore most wise, Shamans of the Hold. The number of Shamans in the Circle were indicative of the size of the Hold. Given how she saw six Shamans standing behind the throne, she realised that the Hold was bigger than she had thought at first glance. Each Shaman in the Circle represented roughly three to four hundred Kobolds, meaning that there lived around two thousand inhabitants in the fort.

She hadn't been surprised when the other Guards had taken both her and her host into custody. Although custody was too strong a word. They had been formally invited to come along, and her captors would remain friendly and polite, unless she refused. Standard procedure, really. She had killed Lik'r and had good cause for that. He had launched a surprise attack, without stating his full name and title, challenging Ab'li using his full name and title, openly refuted Ab'li's right to have her as a guest, while naming her by her full name and title. By the Flows of Life, Kobolds were so formal that getting anything done through proper channels could drive a person up the walls. Had driven her up the walls on one occasion.

She knew she wasn't in any trouble. Lik'r had forfeited his life when he diverged from proper procedures and the only reason his death was swift was because he retracted his accusation towards Ab'li at the end, with Ab'li having accepted that retraction. For roughly three foot tall creatures with long noses, pointy ears and fuzzy hairballs on their head, they really weren't as cute and harmless as they looked.

Sanguilia's eyes wandered around the main hall. It was amazing how much Kobolds could do with trees, given time. People often credited Elves with the ability to grow wood into any shape, and while she had not had the chance to meet any Elves herself, her master having always sent her out in completely different directions, she doubted that the long-ears had the same practical approach to it. The main hall was made from hundreds of trees that had grown around one another in the shape of walls, before converging on the top and merging into a single, massive trunk. From the outside it looked as if the tree had swallowed a massive rock and the ground wouldn't take it. Where Elves liked to grow their buildings far from the ground, Kobolds were more practical, less elegant, and kept their homes firmly planted on solid soil, the roots interwoven into surprisingly flat floors.

There was little in terms of decoration or furniture. There was the throne, plenty of seats that were either in use or stacked against the walls, and what little furniture that was present in the room was purely practical. A few tables, closets, a handful of bookshelves. Light seeped in from magically altered ivy that grew across the ceiling. Kobold Shamans were often seen as incapable of using magic, but that was human folly. They were indeed quite incapable of anything that involved mobile magic, so to speak, but they were masters when it came to stationary magic. Wards, growing trees and manipulating plants, traps, there were few creatures who could match them in those fields.

Her attention was drawn when she felt a sudden urge to roll her eyes and found that the Guard accompanying her and Ab'li had knelt in front of the throne and started speaking with a clear baritone, announcing their presence. She suppressed her desire to yawn and braced herself for another round of formalities.

"Maester Jas'tra of Hold Kras'Vt, your servant Lob'i, Guardian of the West Gate and Keeper of Inner Peace stands before you. I bring you Ab'li, Forebow of the Hunters and Warden of the West Gate, along with a human he proclaims as his guest, Sanguilia, Traveller of the World and Apprentice of He Who Is. During their approach to the Hold they were stopped by Lik'R, Guardian of the West Gate, who insulted Ab'li's honour and insinuated that Ab'li had no right to invite a guest in. Ab'li reacted honourably and spoke the words to open a Duel, but Lik'r failed to respond in kind and launched an attack without voicing his desire for a duel. Upon this, Sanguilia intervened and directly caused Lik'r's death, after proclaiming her identity as Ab'li's guest and speaking the words of servitude to the Hold in exchange for hospitality. The three of us have gathered in front of you to let you decide on whether or not their actions were just and fair."

Knowing very well that any signs of annoyance would be a seen as a grave insult to them, Sanguilia had to content herself by gnashing her teeth in silence. She had enjoyed life with Kobolds before, and found them pleasurable company, but by the Flows, their procedure and need for formality grew more annoying by the minute.

The Maester looked down from his throne towards the kneeling Guard and gave a response that was just as formal as the speech of Lob'i had been. "As you have asked, so shall I judge. Let it be known that I, Maester Jas'tra of Hold Kras'Vt, have heard the tale from my servant Lob'i, Guardian of the West Gate and Keeper of the Inner Peace, involving Ab'li, Forebow of the Hunters and Warden of the West Gate, who stands before me; involving Sanguilia, Traveller of the World and Apprentice of He Who Is, who stands before me, and involving Lik'r, Guardian of the West Gate, who does not stand before me on the account of being deceased."

The Maester turned his attention from Lob'i towards Ab'li, who had been patiently standing at attention. Upon seeing the Maester's gaze on him, he bowed.

"Ab'li, Forebow of the Hunters and Warden of the West Gate, your name is known to me. Your Maester asks of you, my faithful servant, is that which my servant Lob'i, Guardian of the West Gate and Keeper of the Inner Peace reports, correct?"

Ab'li straightened himself again, swelling with pride at being called a faithful servant, rather than just a servant. An important distinction. When he spoke he did so with a strong, clear voice that resonated through the hall. Maester Jas'tra of Hold Kras'Vt, your faithful servant Ab'li, Forebow of the Hunters and Warden of the West Gate stands before you. That which your servant Lob'i, Guardian of the West Gate and Keeper of the Inner Peace reports is true. While on our usual scouting trip, my younger colleague, your servant Lib'l, Feather of the Hunters, and I encountered the lone human Sanguilia, Traveller of the World and Apprentice of He Who Is. Despite being hidden, she had spotted us immediately and had, prior to that, been easily evading all the traps that fill the border between the woods and our Hold."

The narrative has been taken without permission. Report any sightings.

Sanguilia let her thoughts drift off, only paying attention with a fraction of her mind. She had lived through those events, hearing them recapped in such a dreary, formal manner bored her to tears. She would have preferred watching grass grow. She moved her thoughts towards cider instead. Every race she had encountered, so far at least, had their own specialty when it came to alcoholic beverages, and Kobolds were the undisputed masters when it came to brewing cider. She felt that familiar nagging in the back of her head when she thought of it. Her master didn't approve of drinking anything intoxicating, even if her mind was incredibly resilient and she didn't get drunk easily.

She suppressed the urge to smile when she remembered how her master had reacted when he had caught her drinking in secret. After a training session that could only be described as pure torture, he had spent over a year doing nothing but providing her with every type of liquor there was, from the very worst to the very best. He had not scolded her for her choice to drink, nor had he forbidden her from drinking. Instead he had trained her how to deal with alcohol, how it would affect her behaviour, to distinguish flavours, and so many things that by the end of the it all she had nearly promised herself that she'd never touch a drop ever again. She had, however, abstained from drinking for quite some time after that lesson. It had been a very informative experience, but not exactly a pleasant one.

Her attention fluttered back towards the present just in time to hear Ab'li finish up the story.

"After that, Lob'i and the other Guardians, your servants, decided it was the most wise course of action if our tale was brought to you, for you and your wisdom to decide if we acted fairly or not."

The Maester brought up a hand and Ab'li bowed again, before taking a few steps back until he stood alongside Lob'i. "I have heard your tale, Ab'li, Forebow of the Hunters and Warden of the West Gate, and shall take it into consideration. Sanguilia, Traveller of the World, Apprentice of He Who Is and guest of Ab'li, my faithful servant, and of Hold Kras'Vt. As guest of our Hold, do you know and respect our customs? Will you answer and honour me as Maester as if you were my servant?"

She stepped forward, until she was but a few feet away from the throne. She held the old Kobold's gaze for a moment and looked him over, appraising him as much as he was her. She smiled, warmly, and she could feel that it reached her eyes. She bowed towards the old Kobold and spoke, her voice clear as rain and weaving a warm melody through the hall as her tongue twisted itself into unfamiliar shapes to produce the strange sounds that were part of the Kobold language.

Maester Jas'tra of Hold Kras'Vt, I, Sanguilia, Traveller of the World and Apprentice of He Who Is stands before you as guest of Ab'li, Forebow of the Hunters and Warden of the West Gate. I stand before you as your servant and will honour you and your hospitality. My body and mind are at your service while I share your halls."

The Maester gave a curt nod and she raised herself to her full height again, looking slightly down on the Maester. He gave her a friendly, toothy smile and motioned for her to continue.

As she told her version of the events, she found the boring, repetitive formalities a lot easier to tolerate with the Maester smiling at her. She could tell he was a kind man, who disliked war and was happy to have a guest. Upon hearing her confirm that she had stayed in the halls of the Kobold King, his eyes twinkled like stars in a clear sky. As she continued on and told how her promise to serve in body and mind forced her to interfere, his face took on a dark scowl as she recounted just how Lik'r had betrayed his kin with his unprovoked insults and assault. When she mentioned how she had dissolved his sword, the Circle of Shamans stirred to attention, but was silenced by a short gesture from the Maester.

When she was finally done she could tell by the look on the Maester's face that everything would end precisely as near all those involved had predicted. He rose from his throne and nodded solemnly at the trio in front of him, as Ab'li and Lob'i joined her to stand in a single, formal line, which was slightly disharmonious due to her being nearly twice as tall as the Kobolds beside her.

"Let it be known that I, Maester Jas'tra of Hold Kras'Vt, find that Lob'i, Guardian of the West Gate and Keeper of the Inner Peace, Ab'Li, Forebow of the Hunters and Warden of the West and Sanguilia, Traveller of the World and Apprentice of He Who Is, have spoken true and acted justly. Let it also be known that she is our guest and will honour our customs. In turn, we shall provide her with our hospitality and see that she wants for naught. So I declare. So shall it be."

"Hear! Hear!" the Circle chanted behind him.

The formalities done, Sanguilia didn't even have time to blink before she was rushed by a flood of Kobold as the Maester and the Circle abandoned their stately positions to storm her with questions, handshakes and curious prodding. The former two she didn't mind so much, but when the Shamans started to become a bit too liberal with their curiosity and their strange imaginings that prodding would somehow explain her abilities, she sent the entire group floating in a whirl of sparks. Amidst cries of amazement the Maester did his best to call the Shamans to order, and only succeeded after Sanguilia resorted to magically shaking them until they were too occupied with keeping their meals down.

"I have no qualms answering your questions," she began, a mischievous twinkle playing in her eyes that was mirrored by the Maester. "But I do believe there are certain establishments were a weary traveller might wet her throat before speaking in length about such serious matters, are there not?"

The Maester burst out laughing and several of the Shamans, who were currently floating upside down, started nodding enthusiastically. As the sparks dissipated and the group either landed or crashed into the floor, Sanguilia started walking towards the exit, the Maester keeping pace behind her, being one of the lucky few who landed feet rather than head-first. Dusty formalities soon forgotten, she found herself gossiping amicably with the old Kobold as they made for the bar and some badly needed refreshments.

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