I know what you’re thinking – that was a whole chapter? Well, write your own damn book. I am telling this story and the stuff in the first chapter wasn’t really a part of the main story that starts pretty soon here in this chapter, so I decided to make it its own thing and have the actual story start now, in chapter two. Happy? Unhappy? Great, because I don’t care. As far as I know you are reading this a million years in the future and I have been dead for most of that time. Your approval probably won’t make my afterlife any better or worse so who gives a crap what you think.
Anyway, one day I was relaxing at home in my place in Ansdron, one of the northern border cities, when there were a series of loud knocks on my door. I answered it carefully, because people can misunderstand things that you do, you know? Judge you for your past actions, I mean. But it was my old friend Thilos, looking out of breath and worried. I invited him in, or at least I started to, but he pushed right past me and quickly closed the door.
“Sorry to be rude, Dirk,” he said as he moved to the window and pulled the curtains closed, “but I’m being followed.”
I quickly slid up to a different window and used the large dagger suddenly in my hand to push just enough of the curtain aside that I could see the normal looking street scene outside as I asked, “Who is following you, Thilos?”
He sighed as he sat down on one of my comfortable, yet tasteful, chairs. “I don’t know if they’re actually following me right now, I think I lost them. But they are definitely after me.”
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“Who?” I was getting a little frustrated which usually leads me to single word sentences.
Thilos shrugged with a slight smile. “The Warders.” He sounded a little embarrassed.
At this point I was quite confused. “The King’s Warders? As in Thilos, the King’s Warder?” Thilos had been a King’s Warder for almost seven years. It was all he had ever wanted to do, serve guarding and patrolling the borders, just like his parents and his guardian had done. He had joined as soon as he turned sixteen and qualified. So, saying the Warders were following him was like saying his parents were trying to kill him. Crazy!
He nodded, as if relieved I was following his insane logic. “That’s right!” He looked from side to side, apparently checking for eavesdroppers, and lowered his voice to a whisper, “I think they’ve been infiltrated by the Kathaldi.”
Now, you readers probably already know what happened over the next few years but that’s because you live in whatever is the present for you. I lived in the present for me, which is the past (or even the distant past – I don’t know) for you. Suffice it to say that for me, in the ‘at the time present’, no one had heard of the Kathaldi being alive for centuries so this stuff Thilos was saying, even though he is a great guy and my oldest friend, sounded crazy as could be.
Before I continue with the story I guess I should take into account the kind of women I am most attracted to aren’t always that smart so maybe some of my kids, or grandkids, or their kids, or their spouses, or whoever else is reading this, are idiots and don’t know who the Kathaldi are, or were, or whatever. So, I’ll tell you, as quickly as possible so we can get back to my story. My awesome, heroic story. Dang, if you are really that dumb maybe you didn’t know about the Kathaldi coming back and I just ruined the book for you. Oh well, you’ll probably forget about it soon. Man, I love stupid people! They make for the perfect audience.