I am currently hiding in the school nurse’s office, trying my damn best to merge with the walls as 3 pairs of stampeding feet rush past the door.

“Where is that fucking bastard!? I swear to my Goddess that if he is hiding in a women’s room, I am going to kill him!”

I only gulp loudly because the school’s nurse is indeed a woman and I am hiding in her “room”.

Why can’t life be as easy as it was before I blacked out a few months ago? life would have been…

I am cut off from my internal thoughts when I feel a very powerful spell being activated and I am sucked into it and land at the feet of said three women that were chasing me.

“WHERE IN THE HELLS HAVE YOU BEEN YOU BASTARD PIECE OF SHIT OF A FIANCE!?” all three of them yells at the same time.

8 months prior

Meep!

I yell out in both surprise and embarrassment from what I just shouted as a rusted shelving unit collapses in front of me. Barely inches from my nose causing me to jump back a few feet.

“Man, that was funny as hell! I mean, you even sounded like a girl that time, you feminine freak of a man!” a voice I am all too familiar with shouts from the landing overhead.

Sighing, I look up at him. He is still as fat as ever. Last I heard, this 20-year-old pimp pink business wearing 423-pound, greasy black hair and eyes, was scheduled to go off for a fat reduction procedure that is supposedly 100% safe.

Last I heard from researching the process, there is always something that goes wrong. One leady who got it done, now looks like a vampire even though her race is that of an elf. I could only look appalled at how fat she was and raced to the bathroom for an hour interview with my porcelain throne.

Hell, from the infamous grapevine of gossip that I have been hearing (that I really don’t give a shit about since it is mostly lies to spruce up the gossiping), his wife, that was forced to marry him due to debts owed to this douche’s father, won’t even sleep in the same house as him until he loses 290 pounds worth of fat.

Then I hear from the fairer gender that he has a size that is so small, that he literally needs glasses to see it. I can only pity his mother for seeing such a sight.

If I remember correctly, 15 years ago she committed suicide saying something like “I will never have grandkids do to my son’s “ineptitude”, so why should I continue living”. Or something along those lines.

Off topic real quick. Why do women always feel the need look at the mini-me’s of all men and try to justify the amount of kids they will give birth to including how smart their sons will be?

With that out of the way, back to the here and now.

“What do you want Rachel” I ask knowing full well that his real first name will piss him off like no other.

“GOD FUCKING DAMMIT! Whoever told you my real name is going to pay for that! You peons are only allowed to call me Mr. Drake dammit!”

He must not really believe that his father calls me into his office every morning and evening for updates on the various old school stuff they have in this warehouse that is literally falling apart. Meh. Whatever.

“You still haven’t answered my question you tub of lard. And as for you told me your real name, you still are delusional about you father talking with me every day, aren’t you?”

His face turns purple at my words, and I swear that Jabba would be proud of all the wiggling this dude’s fat is doing. Thank God that Jabba doesn’t exist.

He continues to writhe in anger until he starts laughing which makes his fat jiggling even worse making me have the urge to vomit.

“Well since I placed explosives around the place to kill you, I guess I can tell you. My wife told one of my people that she thinks you are sexy as hell with your “perfect blend of feminine and masculine features” as she says. With you out of the way, I can finally force her to take my dick before my appointment next week” Rachel says as he begins to laugh even harder.

To bad for him, my bombs around the main building, this warehouse, his and his fathers vehicles, and many more places that they own, are set to go off in 2 or 3 minutes. Thankfully, his wife lives with her mother who also happens to be the mayor of our city.

How the hell she went into debt is beyond me since her mother makes billions a month.

But whatever, I just stare at him for another few seconds before I look into the window showing me my reflection.

Roughly 6-foot-tall 17-year-old white boy, long platinum blonde hair, and silver eyes with small flecks of gold in them if you know what you are looking for. With the style of clothes I wear, which basically is baggy clothes to hid my athletic body that for some odd reason wont go away no matter what I eat. That is basically how people see me, minus the feminine looking aspect.

I sigh bitterly at the thought of seeing my parents in the afterlife.

With a sad smile, I look up at the Jabba the Hut wannabe and point tell him “then I guess your plan will work with mine since I also plan to blow up this place and a few others. Its just to bad that I have to die just to get revenge for what you family has done to mine.”

Giving me a confused look, he simply says “explain you plebian”.

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“Well, Rachel, my family is still giving your family a migraine. After all, wasn’t it the Ryu family the reason you and yours don’t have full monopoly and the industries of today?”

I can see the light slowly dawning in his eyes and begins to fear what I have just said. That is when I notice a small wet spot on his pants that could only mean one thing. He pissed himself.

Then my inner nerd decided to rear is awesome head and I yell “Explosion!”

I am guessing that it was 100% pure luck that the place began to detonate, but I felt a slime wet substance hit my face. My only thought at the time was “jeez! I planned to look cool and die saying something awesome, and I get jizzed on by something”.

As I watch the pretty fireworks do their thing, I am highly annoyed that the Gods, Goddess’, Demons, and Demoness’ are still have their laugh at my expense.

The next thing I know, I am waking up at my house in my bed. Narrowing my eyes in annoyance, I get out of bed to begin the day ONCE AGAIN like I have for the past fucking month.

Walking outside to get the newspaper, I see my next-door neighbor giving me the look her best “you will be mine” look that makes all men sweat and run for cover.

For the past month she has been giving me that look since for some odd reason, time has been rewinding if I died at the warehouse or someplace else. But today she moves differently like I just teleported here right after I just got done winning or something.

That is when I feel the breeze and freeze. My spine begins to tingle and I turn bright red and she licks her lips and shouts “MARY! HURRY UP OR YOU WILL MISS THE PREVIEW OF YOUR FUTURE HUSBAND RICK PERFORMING!”

In slow motion, I can see the wall explode out of Mrs. Bitch, I mean Mrs. Hendrickson, house were her daughter Mary sleeps at. Only reason I know this, is because this is not the first time she has done this.

Now I am really scarred for life.

I have nothing against Mary, but even I have standards. She is a whopping 312 pounds, spiked long bright pink hair, and is wearing a thong and corset so tight I keep trying to understand how the hell they have yet to rip off.

I just chucked it up to women’s mysteries way.

Now I am running to my only sanctuary to get away from the hippo running full steam towards me. and yes, I was crying and calling out for my mother to save me. How can any not after seeing a sight like that?

After shutting (slamming as hard as I could) the wooden (steel reinforced with titanium, pure steel, and rebar) door, I slide down the door knowing full well that I have just saved my own life. So I just laughed hysterically from the adrenalin and testosterone high from the escape I just made.

By the way, that is a daily occurrence for me.

Ever since I moved into the blue collar area to help with living expenses since I did not have a job, where people make just enough to live comfortably with (compared to my multi million dollar house before anyways), I have been the center of fights wherever I go.

If you see a cat fight, look towards to direction of my house and you will see me running with my tails between my legs.

And yes, I mean tails. As in 10 fox like tails that I can elongate and have a 18” long spear like tip when I need to that are 2 feet long when they are cute fluffy (ALL HAIL THE CUTE AND FLUFFY. Huh? What do you mean I have the give up my man card!?) and 9 and a half feet long in their second form. I also have 4 sets of fucking angelic wings that I can wrap around myself at least 3 times.

I also have these demon, dragon, whatever they come from horns that start at my forehead. They protrude roughly a quarter of an inch before splitting into two directions. One goes down my temples before angling perfectly over my head before almost touching. Where they begin to cover my forehead, another split occurs and they go all the way down to my jawline.

The second part of the split curves around my head. And for some reason is a bit bendable. The horns not only curve around my head but have a 3-step ladder look going for it. I just normally put my hair through it since I don’t know of any other purpose for them.

I am just glad that latter part of my horns are less than an 1/8th of an inch over my head.

And the sad part……. they scream girly.

Women would kill to have something that is so perfect on a Succubus.

Thankfully, again, I can pull them into my body. Since I don’t know anything about my family heritage, I can’t say what the hell I have inside my body. Since my family is rumored to be the only one of its kind. And from what I can tell, no matter who I knock up (as long as they are a 10 out of 10. Not that picky), they will look and have the same appendages as I do.

But since I have an adverse allergic reaction and phobia of said gender, they will soon see an awesome and sexy bloodline die out.

Now with that out of my system, time to get ready for…

Beep..beep…beep…SCHOOL IN 1 HOUR…SCHOOL IN ONE HOUR

Now that pulls me up short. It has been Saturday and Sunday for what seemed like forever and now it is Monday?

Holy shit! That means I am free from the time loop!

I jump up and start doing a jig that would demand that I fully womanize myself if the world could see how well I could shake my ass. As proud as I am at how well I can do so, I will forever deny any and all accusations pointed in my direction.

Then I stop my dancing and rush into a 10-minute readiness with all the essentials that I need to get done (bathing, teeth, etc.), I get dressed in enough time to grab my bags with an unhappy stomach and rush out the door.

Since I can run roughly 60 MPH, I run into the best fast food restaurant ever built. IHOP. Buying my usual of pancakes, eggs over easy, grits, toast, and sausage links (3 extra order of these delicious items), I put them into my bag and continue my way to school.

It takes only about 10 minutes total giving me about 35 minutes to eat. Which is done in 5 minutes. Damn that was good.

With that out of the way, I opened my net space that all kids are installed with as they grow in the mother’s womb. Tiny nanites that attach itself to the brain as it develops to prevent 97% negative feedback that would normally happen to a already born individual. Sadly, most males die or theirs become inert, giving women more power over men.

As I open mine up since I am one of the 17% that actually could use theirs (with 99% of that amount is geeks and nerds. Take that you jock bastards!), a news article shows the different buildings that I wanted to blow up in smoking ruins. Even Rachel body is found in the center of the main explosion. That puts a smile on my face, until I remember waking up in my bed.

Frowning, I try to think of how that could have happened. I remember a few times I black out and wake up elsewhere not knowing how the hell it happened.

Shrugging, I can only hope that my good luck will keep me out of the suspect pool.

Looking up me emails, my schedule, and making sure my homework is done, I had 10 minutes left and play a time filler game that is very boring. Pop the pimple.

That is when I feel something that I only feel when I am in danger. Looking around, I see the twin culprits and begin to grab my stuff and vacate the room.

Twin Culprit’s POV

“What the hell was that sister” the younger culprit by 10 seconds asked.

“Don’t know. But I am getting pissed that I can’t find the heir to that multi trillion-dollar bank account” the older culprit said a bit annoyed.

Sigh

“Sister? Do you really think he is a naturally born human? What if he is a non-human like us” the younger culprit asked.

Starting for a moment, the older girl thought about that for a moment.

“If that is the case sister, then we may have to resort into our most unfavorite schemes. Well at least mother might get a kick out of it, but I can guarantee you that I will murder him if this does not work!”

“Does that mean I get to wear that lingerie that Mom had me buy!? YAY!” that younger one said while jumping up and down causing her DD breasts on her lithe five-foot three-inch height.

The older one could only shake her head in horror on the type of lingerie that they were forced to buy when they found out that they would stop growing at 5’3”.