As Crucis wandered quietly through Kruxol, he saw a few empty areas still filled with spotlit performers in glittering white and gold shirts. These must have been hired by Darys to interrupt and annoy planned gatherings by anti-DeathGang elements. The performers danced flamboyantly in groups, taking it in turns to sing, with slogans like 'Glory to DeathGang' and 'Hail Victory' hung behind them in glitter and neon lights.
Their songs were mostly decorative, upbeat, often meaningless strings of words to accompany the rest of the performance. Walking around, he heard a snippet of one male dancer's loud singing.
Fallen leaves, it's fall, it's fall, yeah, babe
I know, I know, I know, yeah, babe
When you come around, baby, don't say a word, yeah, babe
'Cause I love you, love you, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, babe
It's fall, it's fall, yeah, babe
I know, I know, I know, yeah, babe
When you come around, baby, don't say a word, yeah, babe
'Cause I love you, love you, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, baby
A few DeathGang members were gathered by a thatched-roof building in South Kruxol, watching as one group of dancers performed Rick Astley's 'Never Gonna Give You Up' by request.
Walking back up North, Crucis saw Gastlem approaching from the distant East, with a few hints of blood on his sword. Gastlem had run off to take care of a few people who were trying to stir up trouble after the speech, and had seemingly taken a few kills in the process. Crucis noticed that, like Danemy, Gastlem was wearing a semi-transparent, silvery-black bandana around his neck which was used as a public signifier for DeathGang Elites.
He waved Gastlem over.
"Hey, congrats on the promotion," he said. "Had fun at that tussle?"
"Oh, yeah. Was quite easy, nobody high-level."
Crucis noticed that Gastlem was holding a book in one hand. "What you reading?"
"Oh, this?" Gastlem laughed. "Not really reading it, it's a Light Novel I looted from one of the guys out East. It's one of those silly 'choose-your-own-adventure' books. It's pretty funky, have a look."
THE RISE OF THE GREATEST HERO: A CYOA
Page 1.
You're off to slay the dragon!
What is your reaction?:
a) Nervous. A dragon? That sounds terrifying!
b) Bemused. We're off to... slay the dragon? Oh, well, of course. A hero wouldn't worry about little things like whether a dragon will fry us all to stroganoff (!).
c) Enthusiastic. Woah, cool! A dragon!
d) Determined. I'll do whatever it takes! This dragon won't get the best of me!
e) Underwhelmed. Slaying a dragon? How typical. My, my, I've sold out.
"Suppose we chose 'e'?" Crucis asked.
Gastlem pressed this option, and the book automatically skipped ahead a few pages.
Page 5.
How to salvage your integrity on such a generic quest? Ah ha! You could orchestrate a revolution against the King! He'd never see that coming.
But how would you pull that off?
a) Agitate. Cavort around any peasant towns you cross on your way, screaming, 'The people united will never be defeated!'
b) Educate. Try to convince your slavish, monarch-loving compatriots on the journey that the King is evil. Maybe they will listen, in between chattering about the royal wedding.
c) Organise. Negotiate with the dragon so that it will co-ordinate with you in an attack on the King.
d) Historically informed. Go to Germany and ask for a train back to the Kingdom. See if the Germans will hire you as a spy.
e) Creative. It's a good start, but not enough. A 'revolution' sounds tiresome and messy. What if we laced the dragon with dynamite, then sent it to collide with the palace? Well, here goes nothing!
"It says you want a revolution," Gastlem commented.
"Well, you know, we all want to change the world," Crucis said. "It's a nifty book, though, all kinds of choices in there. Anyway, you dropped Starfighter off to DeathGang territory earlier, right? How's he getting on?"
"Since a lot of DeathGang members will be sleeping in town tonight, there was a lot of place. He took a rest in a small, abandoned building with a bed, I've stayed there once and it's pretty comfortable. He said he used to be lucky if he could find a comfortable haystack in a barn, so it's a step up."
"Sleeping in a barn? How Christlike. Good that that's sorted, though. Did you get the Elite position to help with the wildlife in DeathGang territory?"
"Yeah, especially since we'll be expanding soon. By the way, how did you notice? I don't think my tag should have changed." He pointed to the Guild tag above his name, which still read '
"Aren't you using the scarf, I mean, bandana to show your status until that's changed?"
"Oh, that's it. Yeah, yeah, that's what it's for. Obviously, we won't always wear it, but it's useful to keep a sense of order on DeathGang territory or during events like this. Since the Guild tags haven't changed, Darys decided it made more sense to use these."
"I see. Well, good luck with the wildlife. It's a pretty important role, honestly, since one of the main disadvantages of low-level terrain is the limited fauna. If you can find animals that make for better materials, then it should give DeathGang more power in trading and better QoL."
"Yes, if I can somehow get the rank-and-file to stop over-hunting any decent creature in our territory."
Crucis laughed. "Of course."
Support the author by searching for the original publication of this novel.
"Dicing just sent a message in Guild chat, he'll be giving his summary speech soon. Are you waiting for that? He said he'll help us with the feast after that."
"Yes, I was waiting. I don't really need a reminder of Darys' speech, it was great, but we can catch Dicing when he finishes."
"I'll PM Darys that you said that, by the way. Anyway, let's go."
They walked back over towards the stage, where DicingDevil was silently pacing from side to side. A couple of hecklers had walked up on seeing this new speaker, hoping that he would be more vulnerable than Darys. However, there weren't many, since the crowd for this recap speech was much smaller.
He began speaking calmly and almost contemplatively, almost as if giving a soliloquy. However, there was a derisive edge to his voice.
"I see a few malcontents have arrived here, fresh from their failed attempt at gathering the opposition over there." He pointed to a small square between buildings towards the North, where a troupe of dancers was currently performing. "Poor guys. They must be sick of hearing 'Stayin' Alive.' And who can blame them? Disco's dead, can't these dancing troupes see reason? Of course not, all dancers are perfectly irrational. The only thing more dead than disco is, well, our enemies this morning. And the only thing more irrational than dancers is our hecklers. Even our great leader can't talk sense into them. Still, I'm just giving a recap, so, between us, I think we can ignore the critics. Let's proceed."
He suddenly stood straight and turned towards the audience, saluting them in silence. After a few seconds of this, his voice rose, raucous but disciplined.
"Hail DeathGang! Hail to victory! We have emerged victorious in this great war. Our enemies have been crushed under our boots, and Kruxol is now under our control. The region is now ours for the taking! This is a triumph for you, the members of DeathGang, who have proven their might and superiority over our many foes. We have rebuffed the intruders, and soon we will take our turn invading Kruxol before spreading across this area.
"Our victory is not just a military one but also an ideological one. We have destroyed the enraged moralists and corrupt whales that wished to lay down the law for all others. Their men have lost resoundingly on the battlefield, as resoundingly as they would have won in the church and the bank! We have shown that a true Guild is not made of money or morality, but of soil and blood. We shall take Kruxol from their domain and place it in a new, flourishing one, a territory that is united, strong, and free from the shackles of scrutiny.
"But our work is not done. We still have enemies who are plotting against us, who want to see us fall. We must remain vigilant and continue to strengthen our Guild. With the momentum on our side, this is the correct time to go for the jugular, and eliminate the opposition before it has the time to concentrate itself. You must be ruthless, and not hold back an inch! We must expand our territory and secure our place in the world. We must create a new order that will last, an order that is based on our values and our beliefs.
"To those who spread doubt and guilt: you have no place in this Guild, and you will be cast out and hunted down. You're not DeathGang, so just stop trying! Better stick to what we believe!
"I call upon all DeathGang members to join me in this great endeavor. We have a duty to our Guild, a duty to ourselves, a duty to our future. Let us continue to march forward, with our heads held high, and our hearts filled with the glory of our victory. We are the masters of this place. Let us show the world what we are capable of."
He stepped off the stage simply, and Danemy called Crucis and Gastlem over to join Akshel and the rest of the group from earlier. As DicingDevil saw them, he walked over as well. Akshel playfully ruffled his hair, while the rest congratulated him on the speech.
"It's just a summary, nothing that special," he replied, smiling. "Alright, so let's go to the feast now. You guys should have some bear meat, right? That should be interesting. By the way, I managed to purchase some capsaicin crystals, quite a steal. I'll tell you where to get that later. But we're keeping it hidden, since if it was a free-for-all then our guys would all mistake it for salt and take too much, roll around the floor, and not recover for three days. Stuff burns. I'll give you guys a try if you want."
"Yeah, go ahead. Today was a tragic day, evil won and the better side lost," Crucis said, "it's reasonable that we all cry some tears over it."
"A sad day indeed. Anyway, does anyone have some mink meat left over? Mink meat is usually awful, but according to Darys the gem-furred ones have decent meat that 'tastes like shrimp.' Yeah, I don't know how that works. Worth a try, though."
"Yeah, I've got a bit," Akshel said. "I think Grisier does too, he must be on one of the tables already. You can ask him."
"I'll hand mine over, too. Wasn't really sure what to do with it, so I hung on to most of it," Crucis said. "So how do you plan to prepare the bear?"
"Over here, there's not that many food options available," DicingDevil said. "There's not that much available in terms of seasoning, but we did manage to get some onions, garlic, also some sage because that's apparently a specialty in this region. But mostly we're just eating the cooked meat."
"That should be fine," Crucis said. "Let's go."
"Yeah, I'm just famished, honestly. The mink will probably be disgusting, but I'll probably still eat it," Danemy said glibly.
DicingDevil led the group to a large, chalk-white hallway, where DeathGang members were gathered around a few tables or standing by the walls eating. So far, they were mostly just eating small appetisers made with vegetables, and a few had made wraps out of a few pieces of rabbit meat. For a feast, it was a fairly minimalistic affair, but for most players in the game it would be a luxury.
Darys was sat at a table in the centre eating hummous, made from chickpeas purchased from Sanra, but he sat up and waved to welcome DicingDevil.
After saluting back, DicingDevil turned to the group. "Alright, hand over the meat, I'll take that to get cooked. It's probably cheaper if we pool it together. Since players aren't allowed to handle the fire in the kitchens, people have to use NPCs to heat stuff up properly." They handed over the meat. "There'll be some fried grasshopper coming around, try some out, it's a DeathGang specialty." He smiled mock-assuringly, then walked away towards the kitchens on the left.
"Bonsieur," Gastlem said, walking back from a brief meeting with Darys. "Our leader wants us to clear out some farmland for chickpeas, says he got OudNasser to go all the way to Sanra for the seeds. At this rate, he's just going to make me turn DeathGang territory into a culinary hot-spot."
"Having his General take a dangerous journey to the West, just for chickpeas?" Danemy said. "Our leader is quite a connoisseur."
"Honestly, OudNasser was probably going to Sanra anyway, and Darys just told him to pick these up. But that's not the story he told."
"At least OudNasser got compensation, he seems to be enjoying the hummous," Crucis said, glancing at the central table where OudNasser sat alongside Darys and some other Generals and Elites.
"Yeah, those two have similar tastes," Danemy said. "Story goes, and I don't know if it's true, that OudNasser had started narrating tales from Sinbad the Sailor and the Odyssey to liven up a trip to a dungeon. Darys enjoyed it enough that he kept chatting even after logging out, and found that OudNasser knew the game much better than most, so he made Oud a General. This may or may not be mostly made up."
"Whew, it's only been three days, and you guys already have lore. Impressive!" Crucis said.
"Yeah, that's the word. 'Lore.' Exactly. Not 'made up.' If it looks good, and it feels good, then surely it is true."
Soon, a DeathGang member walked over to the group, carrying a large platter of fried grasshoppers. "Spicy ones on the left, normal salt-and-pepper on the right. Only choose the spicy ones if you trust Dicing, I didn't," he said politely.
"Well, you'd better trust him now, Kan. He's going to be the next Vice-Leader," Danemy said, grabbing one from the left.
"I trust his leadership, just not his ability to not burn out my tastebuds for days."
"Hush! You will eat the spicy bugs!"
Crucis also grabbed a grasshopper from the left, while the rest of the group grabbed as grasshopper each. The DeathGang players seemed quite accustomed to it.
"So, what's this like?" he asked.
"It's a bit like seeds or nutty sardines, kind of fiery though," Akshel replied. "These ones have maybe a taste of anchovies? Our guys make a habit of looking for good places for grasshoppers, so we keep finding more savoury ones."
"Always pursuing culinary excellence, then?"
"Exactly!"
Akshel ate the grasshopper gleefully in one bite, then staggered backwards a step as the spice kicked in.
"That grasshopper hopped jolly high," he commented, shaking his head.