Chapter Thirty-Two

Jackson knew it was the right concept because of what he had been through already. All he had done since waking up in the dungeon was rise from the ashes. It seemed appropriate to him that his concept should be the phoenix. He looked over at Lazarus.

“Okay, now what?”

Lazarus chuckled.

“First, why don’t you tell the class the concept you’ve chosen?”

Jackson shrugged.

“I think the phoenix is a good concept for me.”

Lazarus’s expression turned thoughtful as he considered. Then he nodded.

“Yes, that concept does seem very suited to you. Alrighty then, now that you two young people have your concepts in mind, it’s time to start the process of weaving them into your Domain with your spirit. This means more meditation. Go ahead and sit down.”

“What’s your concept?” Jackson interrupted.

Lazarus glared at him. The ancient spirit hated being interrupted, but Melanie spoke up as well.

“You know ours. It seems only fair.”

She shared in the spirit’s glare. Then he sighed and crossed his arms.

"Technically, I am dead. My spirit and my Domain are bound to the skull. This offers me a kind of…” He seemed to struggle to find the right word.

“A barrier to the next life. That means my ability to interact with the world is very limited, and the concept I do have is essentially non-existent.”

Lazarus sighed when he saw they were still waiting for his answer.

“Fine. My concept is a lion.”

Melanie and Jackson shared a look.

“Why were you so reluctant to share that?” Melanie asked.

Lazarus rubbed his face.

“Concepts back in my day were not usually something shared between people. Masters usually knew their students' concepts because they helped guide them to them. Sometimes couples would share their concepts with one another, but that was generally it. It was seen as a very intimate detail about oneself, and why wouldn’t it be? I’ve told you this already, but concepts have to have a personal connection to you and to who you are. Then it’s literally woven into the very manifestation of the most intimate part of yourself, your spirit. What’s more intimate than that?”

Lazarus grew impassioned by the end of his speech and quickly closed his mouth when he realized he was ranting. He cleared his throat.

“Now, can we get on with this? Or do you have more personal questions for me?”

Melanie and Jackson shared a laugh at his expression and sat down, cross-legged. Lazarus nodded and sat down with them.

“There are two important things to keep in mind when weaving your concept into your Domain. Connection and imagery. Manipulating your spirit in this way takes a lot more control than just immersing yourself in it or seizing it all at once. You need to do it slowly, a bit at a time, infusing the image with everything you are. Now, let’s get practical with this. Close your eyes and just try to take control of just a thread of your spirit.”

Jackson closed his eyes and found his spirit, a process that was becoming easier the more he did it, especially after having to do it in the midst of combat. As he had discovered earlier, seizing his spirit was much easier than immersing himself in it and embracing it. The problem, though, was that getting just a thread was proving hard. Every time he grabbed his spirit, all he managed to do was grab a giant amount of it. It was sort of like trying to grab a single thread in a small ball of them when you had massive hands.

He took several deep breaths, focusing his mind, calming his thoughts, and trying to be gentle, reaching out with a feather touch of his will. Frustration began to bloom as he pulled and pulled, but he failed to grab hold of any of his spirit. Using such a light touch with his will meant he lacked the strength to pull anything.

It was a delicate balance, and a frustrating one. Not too forceful, not too weak—it had to be just right. Jackson opened his eyes and blew out a breath, gritting his teeth. Lazarus tutted at him.

“Letting this bother you isn’t going to help. Come on, sit back down, and calm your mind. Have patience; we have time.”

Jackson glared at him and looked at Melanie. She almost seemed to be asleep; she looked so tranquil. Something occurred to him then—something he knew but hadn’t wanted to acknowledge. He was jealous of Melanie. She was always better than him at these exercises; she was always ahead. She had manifested her aura before him and picked up on sanguinary arts before him. It wasn’t fair; he had abilities she simply did not have, at least not yet, and he won their spars as often as he lost them.

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She worked just as hard as he did, and so what if she had more talent in other areas than he did? Jackson took another deep breath and nodded. Acknowledging the feeling seemed to help, releasing a tension he wasn’t aware he had. He sat down again and refocused. This time he tried the same feather-touch approach but added just a little more, as if tying two feathers together. Not weighing much more, but enough to grab that single thread he needed.

He almost lost it; he was so relieved when he managed to maintain it. Then he released it and practiced grabbing it again the same way as before. When he could do it reliably, he let out another breath, smiled, and opened his eyes, looking at Lazarus.

“Alright, I can easily grab that thread. Now what?”

Melanie opened her eyes and grinned at him.

“It took you long enough,” she teased. Jackson stuck his tongue out at her, and she laughed. Lazarus wagged his finger at them.

“Now, now, don’t make me separate you two. Now that you can reliably grab that thread, you need to be able to maintain hold of it while also keeping focused on the imagery of your concept. This is the hard part, my dear young students. Focusing on two different things is not easy. Take your time and take breaks; you’ll likely need it. If you don’t have anything by tomorrow, we will continue training in other ways. Get to it.”

Jackson had to admit, it did sound hard. Truly focusing on two things at once was difficult. Anyone could multitask when those tasks only required a split-second of attention. True focus, though? He shook his head, a little daunted. He broke it down and considered the pieces of it. Focusing on the thread took a lot, but it got easier with practice. Perhaps the key was focusing without focusing.

When someone did something enough times, it became ingrained, almost subconscious. Jackson needed to lighten the mental load. With that in mind, he spent the next several minutes simply grabbing a thread of his spirit and weaving it throughout his body. He did nothing else of note with it; he just moved it. From his Domain, to his head, to outside his body, to his hands, to his knees, and back inside his Domain, through the river of blood, into the vortex of destruction.

He released it and then did it all again. After that, he got up and started going through some of the basic sanguinary forms, which caused Lazarus to raise his eyebrow at him, but Jackson waved him off. He practiced the forms while simultaneously trying to weave that thread of spirit throughout his body. He wove it into his slow punches and blocks. He wove it down to his legs as they moved. Then he picked up the speed, weaving as fast as he could move. He lost control of the thread several times but kept going, focusing and seeking that harmony he had felt when facing Melanie last time.

It was hours of doing this while Melanie merely sat cross-legged, eyes closed. Her approach must have been different from his. Jackson took a break a few moments later, letting out a breath and walking around, stretching his right arm across his chest. He rolled his neck and then got back down to it.

It was hours later when Jackson felt like threading his spirit was almost second nature, something he could do without even really thinking about it. Feeling like he had successfully mastered that aspect, he focused on the second challenge—the concept itself. The imagery was important, but it was the connection to it that he needed to think about.

Lazarus had said multiple times that concepts had to be connected to you on a personal level. The phoenix worked with his aspects; that was clear, and he had been rising from the ashes. But was that enough? Anyone could go through hardship and rise from it stronger. Why did he connect to the phoenix? What about it was personal to him?

It took a lot of thought before it came to him. Jackson had been transformed since he came here, no longer the same. He had been reborn, like the phoenix, and he kept changing and regenerating, just like the mythical bird. Just like the bird, he drew strength and renewal from life. He nodded to himself, and from these thoughts, he brought an image to mind.

In his inner eye, a phoenix rose from a pile of ash, flames flickering into existence and growing, twisting and flashing into the fiery mythical bird, majestic, proud, and burning with life. Then it died in an explosion of burning red and gold flames before renewing itself and starting the process over again.

Jackson focused on the image, studying it until he was certain he had it firmly in mind. He let it go and repeated the process half a dozen times. Then he began the same process he had used with the thread of his spirit, bringing the image into mind and banishing it, all while standing up and moving, practicing forms. Once he was certain he knew the image inside and out, which took several more hours, he settled down to the next challenge.

The next challenge was being able to hold the thread of his spirit while simultaneously bringing up the image of his concept. Jackson’s hard work paid off. He was able to do both successfully with minimal trouble. However, sitting down was one thing; he wanted more control. Jackson stood up and once again began to practice the forms, doing his best to maintain the thread in his mind as well as the phoenix image and move.

The result was a near breakdown of the entire process. He lost the thread, and the image faded from his mind’s eye. When he managed to regain control, it went better, but his movements simply weren’t as fluid as they should have been. They lacked power, and many of his steps were misplaced. Jackson sighed, let go of everything, and took several deep breaths.

He was trying to do three things at once when he really only needed to do two. Jackson kept at it, unwilling to give up. If he could master this, then he could easily work with the thread and his image without jeopardizing anything. However, it kept falling apart almost immediately. After repeating this ten or more times, he let out a growl and looked down at his clenched fists, which turned white.

Lazarus spoke to him then.

“I see what you’re trying to do. It’s a bit ingenious, lad, but it’s too much. You’ve done enough; try weaving your spirit through your image now.”

Jackson shook his head.

“If I do it and I’m not absolutely sure, I’ll mess up. I need to be sure.”

Melanie looked up, opening her hazel eyes.

“I’m doing it now, Jackson. It’s slow going, but it’s easier than Laz here put it, I think.”

Lazarus shot a surprised glance at her.

“Or maybe you’re just a little monster, lass.”

She grinned and shrugged.

“If I can do it, so can you, Jackson. Come on, try.”

Jackson looked at her, and she nodded reassuringly at him. He ran a hand through his hair, growling. Then he nodded and sat down.

“Fine, okay, you two win. I’ll do it then.”