[40th Year of Foresai, Upper Fire Month, Day 16]
Climb adjusted himself, then did so again. He waited in it for thirty seconds, and then twisted again. He tried several more configurations of his body before giving up, eventually laying flat on his back, and chuckling to himself.
This bed is too soft. I can’t find a single comfortable position. It’s kind of ironic, but this is the opposite of a problem I would ever expect myself to have.
Climb could easily divine Renner’s thought process in selecting this mattress for him, and he found it unbelievably endearing.
She wanted me to have a comfortable bed, and because she finds her incredibly soft bed comfortable, she assumed that’s what I would like. So when she went to purchase this one, she got one as soft as hers. I’ve been sleeping on one of the bunks in the guardhouse for what, six years now? Those things are practically stone slabs, but it’s what I've gotten used to.
He covered his eyes with his hands and laughed a bit, finding her innocence and naivety not only cute, but humorous.
Of course she would get me something like this. Gods, what a fretting mistress she is.
Climb gave up altogether on getting rest and swung his legs over the side of the bed. Standing, he walked to the other end of his room. He was still getting used to the concept of having his own space, and he found himself looking back and forth for his bunk-mates in the manner he had done so for years.
Breaking that habit is going to take time.
He took a few steps to his armor stand, and began to don his gear. This was not the only set of equipment he had in the room; his old steel plate, as well as some jousting equipment that Renner had given him on a flit of hers. He slipped himself into an underlayer, freshly washed to the standards of his mistress. Over that, he threw over a mithril chain layer. With that on, he began to strap on each piece. The armor itself was lumminant in the way it cast reflection, and in its current clean and unscuffed state, shown more brilliantly and purely than any steel of Kingdom-make. He could gear fully in two minutes, this sans his helmet - which Renner always wanted him without. He evaluated himself and felt no small amount of pride.
I look like a knight in this. That’s probably what she intended. Still, I’m- I’m not. I’m never going to be one.
Climb sagged slightly. These moments of clarity were always painful for him, and they were coming more often than he knew how to handle.
King Ramposa was talking with all those suitors at her ball. She’s going to be getting married soon. Married… I don’t want her to get married. That’s selfish of me. Gods, how can I be jealous of the princess? She- she’s the princess. Everything is so confusing.
For every flame of adolescence Renner burnt herself on, Climb did so many-times over. For every red-faced fantasy of one another or poorly repressed lust of the other’s body, Climb suffered from such at least three-fold. In physic and psychic aspects, he was younger, and had none-the-control for which his mistress was so wonton in exercising. Even more impactful at this matter, he was male, and the heat of his age found him to be a fuel that could be ignited white hot. He suppressed those urges now, but soon feared he would need to resort to genuine self-abuses to arrest his ever racing mind. For now, he simply slipped from passions of being with her to merely those of being her crusader.
She loves this nation, she loves it so deeply. Just watching her talk to Lakyus, her staying up late to work on that ledger, deciphering those Eight Fingers codes, or any of the research she does. She’s tireless. None of her siblings are like her, I wonder why. Why is she the only one in that family that seems to care? And- and she’s so smart too. Seriously, I can never keep up with her. It makes me feel bad sometimes, but it seems no one else can either. Gods why does everyone call her as stupid? And, Zanac calls her a “monster” so often. How can he do that? Its so confusing. How can anyone see that in her? I'll protect her, I’ll protect her no matter what.
His mind resolved, he inspected his armor one last time, this less as self-flattery and more as practical consideration of his binds. His eyes snagged on a loose strap on his left shin guard, and with that mistake rectified with a quick and practiced motion of his hands, he strapped his sword on and left his room. This was one of the few things in his possession Renner had not provided to him, though not for lack of her desire too. Swords were laced gifts in Re-Estize. They were tools of death, but more importantly in the eyes of the nation’s institutions, were tools of status.
The nobility had a long and resentful memory, and still pined for the days that such blades could only be possessed by those with titled-blood. Threats of horned and sulfurous origin a century prior had since stripped the nation of such a blindly beheld tradition, but the rules and customs around it lingered as phantoms in the zeitgeist. Put simply, any member of the royal family bestowing a sword upon anyone indicated pending lordship, and Climb could never possess such a title. This sword thus was not a lovingly considered gift from Renner, but whatever surplus garbage Quartermaster Luka was able to pawn off on him without attracting ire from Jelka.
He opened the door, and left his room. He found himself in the same hall that led to his old bunk, yet was deeper into the guardhouse, closer to the main body of Valencia. This was an officer’s room, ones typically left for higher ranks of knights. He dared not imagine the arguments Renner must have made to Ramposa on his behalf, but they must have been impassioned. Climb had yet to realize that the King had a fondness for him.
How else could she have gotten me this place? I have a room of equal size to my sergeant. It’s unimaginable.
This sudden advancement of his material conditions without a tandem rise in status had left him with none of his wit, and much resentment. He turned to his right, looking down the hall to his old bunk room. He caught the gaze of two of his fellow guards, commoners like him. They turned away in disgust and anger. Climb’s mouth twitched.
I think I might skip breakfast today.
Climb bit into his loaf, scooping a little of the porridge into his mouth as he did so. This was no stelar combination of flavors, and did not particularly elevate the meal, but Climb simply did this from habit. It was warm and filling, that being the sum of its purposes. The guardhouse refectory teemed with life this morning, more so than usual. Several dozen additional men crowded into the space, guards and knights of the servants who had arrived the day before for Renner’s birthday. In rare form, two women were also present; both were grizzled, and they sat alongside a band of men who were unfamiliar to Climb. He cast his gaze around the space and found Jonnah and Ehkan sharing a spot on one of the five long-tables. Bowl and bread in hand, Climb walked over.
Gods, a room! I can’t believe she got me a room.
He couldn’t help but smile. The events of the evening before had left him feeling near silly. He was overbrimming with joy, and simply thinking about her caused his world to melt into a glaze of summer colors, framed wonderfully by the light of the dawn. He looked out a window, its shutters locked open to abate the heat of the coming day, the sun not yet loosed from its place below the rim of the palace wall. He took in a gulp of the outside air, untainted by the miasma of the space he stood in now, and turned and approached his friends. He sat across from Jonnah and Ekhan, both sitting adjacent. He looked over and saw the two women, mostly to confirm his earlier glance.
“Who are they?”
“Who are who?”
Jonnah’s biting tone caught Climb wrongfooted, but he dismissed it. Ekhan sighed slightly, and took a swig of his morning’s ale.
“Those women over there.”
“They’re Boullope’s bondsmen, er, I suppose bondswomen.”
They can’t be knights, can they?
“Are they uh- guards like us?”
“The term is professional soldier Climb. The term guard puts us second rate to knights, and in truth, we aren’t. We guard the palace but we are not ‘guards’, we’re warriors.”
Ekhan stood and projected himself to the rest of the table, itself occupied only by fellow low-blooded soldiers, not letting the opportunity for a lecture go to waste.
“And that goes for all of you’se. We have a reputation to maintain. I don’t want to hear you all calling yourselves ‘guards’ like it's some sort of title, you understand?”
He got non-committal mumbling as response, and had Ehkan been twice awake - and half the age - he would have pursued the matter further, but he stood down for now. His fires tempered, he slowly lowered himself down, turning back to Climb who, for his part, had a wry grin on his face for his part in having caused the outburst.
“I suppose they must be capable fighters then. Not many nobles hold women in their service.”
“Better than being held in the service of a woman.”
It took Climb a few moments to process Jonnah’s words. They were hissed, vitriol frothing at his mouth.
Wait, is he talking about me.
“Jonnah, what do you mean?”
“Isn’t it fucking obvious?”
“Jonnah I don’t understand-”
“I’m talking about you Climb, you and your third rate mistress.”
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What?! How is she in any way third rate?
“Her Highness is a wonderful and beautiful woman-”
“‘Befitting the title of Golden.’ You’ve said that so many fucking times its become unbearable. No, actually, it was bearable until last night.”
“How can you say-”
“Your own fucking room?! How- no, what did you do to deserve that? You have the quarters of a fucking knight-officer. How is that possible?”
Ehkan tried his best to intervene, setting his hand on Jonnah’s left arm.
“The Royal Guard get their own rooms.”
“But he’s not Royal Guard! He never can be because that’s a tilted position! He doesn’t have the blood for that. How can you defend this?! Even you don’t have your own room!”
“Well, yes but-”
“Why do you defend him? He’s just some fancy of the Princess, he’s not better than us yet he gets such treatment. I’m twice the fighter he is. Why should he get preference on the basis that he’s eye candy for that adolescent hag.”
Climb struck the table in anger and quickly pushed off, being able to bear no more of Jonnah’s attacks on his mistress. Jonnah did in tandem, thrusting his arm across his body, ready to draw his blade.
“Come on, give me a fucking chance. How’s it feel relying on a fucking Princess to make up for your inadiquacy?”
“Don’t insult her highness!”
“Maybe if I slice your fucking face up she’ll stop caring about you.”
“Guard Jonnah stand down!”
The sudden shout came from two tables down, Knight Retha eating a meal before bed. Beside him, Knight Keller - the man who would soon lead the first rotation - spoke too.
“Adjutant Climb, you too. Ehkan, control your men. The palace has guests today and you let them slip into such disorder.”
“Ehkan this is horseshit! How can I be expected to sit idly while this happens?! This isn’t fair.”
“Jonnah! You’re relieved of your duties!”
Jonnah and Climb were breathing heavily, and the pause in their fighting allowed the silence of the room to pour into Climb’s ears. No one was talking, almost everyone, especially the men of other masters were looking at the five way engagement. Jonnah turned his gaze to the floor, and let his arms fall to his sides. He stepped away from the table, leaving the refectory without further comment. Climb released the tension in his body and looked to Ehkan, who to his surprise was levying a cold glare back. Climb swept his head rightward, and saw that every guard, without exception, was looking at him in that same way. Climb swallowed.
—
I haven’t been able to get a whole conversation from Ekhan since then. I suppose he has obligations to keep the peace with the Knights and the Maids, but do the rest of them need to cut me out as well? No, I suppose they all feel the same way. Jonnah won’t even talk to me; when I tried to reconcile he just called me a suck-up and told me to fuck off. It hurts. It hurts a lot.
His eyes drifted down to the floor, exhaling slowly. He turned to his left and began to walk into the body of the palace. He passed through two sets of double doors, and entered onto the main floor. He found his way to the nearest staircase and ascended two flights. Within two minutes, he had arrived at her room.
That’s Adjutant Knight Galdra. He’s Royal Guard I think. I suppose the Warrior Troop won’t be up to strength for some time. Can’t relieve them of duties any time soon.
“Adjutant Climb, you're here early.”
“Yes sir. Should I return in an-”
“It’s none the matter. You can assume duties if you wish. Her highness is already awake.”
“Thank you, sir.”
Galdra gave him a quizzical look, giving a soft huff at his response. Climb had no clue how to interpret it, simply deciding to ignore it. He approached and knocked on the door.
“Enter!”
He opened it, and stepped in. He saw Renner sitting in her usual spot. Climb was nothing but attentive to her, and immediately got an odd sense from the sight before him.
She looks frazzled. Why?
“Climb! How nice it is to see you. Did you get up early today?”
“Yes, Your Highness.”
Her voice sounds rattly; no, she's trembling too. Is she ok? This seems familiar to me, why?
“Your Highness, are you ok?”
“Eh? Oh, yes, I think. Evileye sent me a gift of some roasted beans recently and I’m trying it out!”
Roasted beans? What could that mean?
“Ah… Yes, Your Highness.”
Renner pouted slightly, realizing her explanation wasn’t sufficient.
“No, it's uh, this beverage. Like the teas I drink, but it’s much different.”
Realization flooded into Climb in this moment, and he could tell exactly what happened.
She looks exactly like Gregor did after he downed two stamina potions back to back. What was the term Ehkan used? A “Pumping-Heart High?” Oh my Gods. She must be feeling miserable right now.
“Your Highness, are you sure?”
Renner tilted her head, eyes widening slightly. She opened and closed her mouth several times before speaking.
“I look that disjoint? I apologize Climb-”
“Your Highness, you needn’t say sorry!”
“No, no. I’m serious. I apologize. Evileye warned me this was a stronger beverage but I didn’t take her seriously enough on that matter. I didn’t mean to make you worry. My body just feels slightly erratic right now; I’m running overhot.”
She would feel apologetic to me over this? Because she made me worry? That’s… that’s so nice of her.
“I do promise I’m fine. I can handle these overphlostiginated brews, I’ve done this to myself before.”
Renner giggled, Climb smiled in an embarrassed way. This was a near constant for him.
“That black tea of yours, Your Highness?”
“Yes. Still, this is of another caliber. Would you like to try it?”
Why do you always ask? Your face always lights up whenever I give my opinion on any new leaf of yours. Besides, you’ve already set out a second cup. How could I not say yet?
“Of course, Your Highness.”
Climb approached her side as she poured him some of the beverage. When he got near enough, she gingerly handed him the cup.
It looks as dark as pitch. How strange.
“Supposedly this is drunk in Slane. At least, that's what Evileye said. She recommended adding milk and ground nectar-cane, and to be honest I don’t disagree with her.”
Climb brought the black liquid to his lips, blew on it gently, and sipped it.
Oh this is quite enjoyable!
“This is very nice, Your Highness.”
“Eh? The bitterness doesn’t bother you?”
Is it supposed to?
Climb looked down, and saw that his mistress’s cup was chalk white with cream.
“Not particularly, Your Highness.”
It was Renner’s turn to blanch, and she looked away half ashamedly. They stayed in place there for some time in silence, sipping their coffee. Climb’s eyes drifted to the table, seeing Renner had piled on a few books. Since her reunion with Gazef she had dove headlong into researching the matters they discussed, opining about it being one of her duties as princess to know what plagued her subjects. Learning of what the Warrior-Captain’s was, and was capable of was a complex and loaded endeavor.
Comprehension of arcane codices and thaumonomicons necessitated an understanding of higher math that Renner had never been given as part of her education, and Climb watched her scribbling out practice problem sets. She would read a problem, pause, thump her pen against the table, and begin to scribble out an answer a few seconds later, occasionally flipping to the back of the book and either delighting or pouting in the correctness of her solution. She would undoubtedly have new requests for him this day. After she realized she had made a particularly devastating mistake on an exercise written in symbology that Climb had no hope of understanding, Renner leaned back, sighed, and handed him a slip of paper.
“Climb if you could please check these books out from Librarian Yelta, oh and please, return this book.”
“Yes, Your Highness.”
I don’t understand why he won’t lend these books to her. I know she’s a woman, but still, it makes no sense to me. Lakyus is too, and she’s a stronger warrior than everyone but one I know. All of the Blue Roses are. Shouldn’t it be a good thing to have the princess educated in these matters? Surely it can’t be a matter of sheltering her.
—
“Oh, yes this is quite the selection! The Golden Princess sure knows how to pick good histories for you.”
“Yes, her highness does.”
“Ah, she put a work from Lord Vendra on here! He’s one of my favorites. Hm, if she wants you to read records on the border lands, then there’s another book I should get you.”
“Which one is that?”
“Ah, just an atlas. Some of the location names blend together too much, and the maps in that book really aren’t the best. Still…”
Yelta raised his eyebrow, and looked off to the side.
“What is it, head librarian?”
“You don’t need to call me that Climb. You forget, I’m a lowblood like you. I don’t mind you calling me by my name; in fact, I prefer it.”
“Yes, sorry, of course. What was it you wanted to say?”
“Ah, I’m just wondering. I know it’s a dark matter, and do not let your lips unseal on this point for any but I, but this is the third request I’ve gotten for Codex Daemonicus this week. First from the King himself, second from Defense Coordinator Jelka. It has me wondering; all this trouble with the Head-Warrior, was it of immaterial origin?”
“I- I wouldn’t know. Warrior-Captain Stronoff was badly hurt. Perhaps this is simply for their sense of security.”
“Hm… I suppose. Alright, I’ll get you a copy.”
Yelta walked away, searching the shelves of the library for the relevant material Renner had so requested; in his mind, on the behalf of Climb.
Both King Ramposa and Jelka? That’s almost disturbing. I’ll need to tell her that, make sure she’s aware of them taking such action. She must really suspect that woman, the one in black, as being a demon. I suppose she suspects Gown himself, too. What a complicated matter.
Climb dropped his gaze to the floor, feeling his mood begin to slip in tandem.
To think she needs to worry about this. To think she has to care, to study such matters. She’s just a princess, right? She should have no need to have me sneak around, doing things like this, getting her books on things as foul as demons. What was it that the Crown Prince said? “You have no place in this business.” He was right, she doesn’t. She is a third princess, for her to worry about matters of national sanctity is absurd. Yet, she has too.
She saw Gazef’s inner thoughts a month before anyone else. Told him to be prepared for danger. She’s the only one in the family who seems committed to fighting Eight Fingers. Barbro is in league with them for Gods-sake. When she told me that, I wanted to scream; to break the table I was sitting in front of. How could he do such a thing? How could he side with those people destroying the Kingdom, hurting its people? How could she stay so calm in the face of that? She’s valiant, more so than anyone else I know. Gazef is brave, but he can play at these issues straight. She can’t. She has to hide herself, to make herself look weak and vulnerable and useless. No one but the Blue Roses, or Gazef would ever take her seriously when she comes forward with her ideas. With her plans to save the Kingdom, so save its people. The slavery ban passing was a miracle.
She can’t even rent out books for herself. It's frustrating. I wish they could see her as I did. I wish others would listen when she spoke. I remember those first few months with her so clearly. How she was unafraid to voice her ideas, her conceptions of things. She hasn’t been like that since. Even with Lakyus she hides herself from time to time. How crushed she must feel. How utterly weak.
“I’m going to serve her and stay loyal to her, no matter what.”
She deserves at least one loyal servant.