It had been weeks since the explosion in the lab and Phyron was just returning from his trip to the academy to find a new apprentice. Despite his own prestigious background and royal research grant, it was becoming harder and harder to find new apprentices. Apparently if a few die in unfortunate accidents which really could not be attributed to him, then the best applicants all suddenly vanish.

His new apprentice had a bit of a history and no other wizard wanted to take her on as an apprentice after her last two masters died in tragic accidents. If there was even the slightest hint of wrong doing on her part she would have stood before a tribunal and been summary punished, but even though there was no evidence of wrong doing she carried a stigmata.

“Apprentice,” Phyron began, having already forgotten the poor girl’s name, “have the goblins unload the cart but watch them closely as they tend to be a bit clumsy.”

Mary-Ann Blowhard, who had been ridiculed about her name almost since birth, was surprised to find that she was annoyed by her master’s inability to remember it.

“Where do I have them put it, master?” Her master looked at her strangely for a moment and she prepared herself for some crude innuendo.

“In the storage room, of course.” He stated before immediately heading off to one of the towers.

She held up her hand and wanted to ask where the storage rooms were, after all this was her first time in her master’s castle, but then just gave up as she realized that this master was going to be just like all the others. When they were not using her as cheap labor, they ignored her. She suspected that the entire apprentice system was some form of giant hazing ritual.

Sighing in frustration she turned around to find one of the goblins directing the others to unload the cart. She wasn’t sure how he had done it, but her master had the best trained goblins she had ever seen, especially the foreman! She figured that this must be why her master didn’t show her where the storage rooms were.

Of course, if she knew that the “foreman” was just being lazy in telling the other goblins to empty the cart before someone could tell him to, she might have had a different opinion. He stood there with one finger up his nose trying desperately to get at the itch that seemed to be getting worse as time went on. It surprised him that the other goblins didn’t complain about him giving them orders but he wasn’t about to look a gift dragon in the mouth. That was a just a good way to get eaten.

Ever since the accursed slime invaded his nostril it had itched and he had been having strange thoughts or well any thoughts really. It is well known that goblins don’t so much think as just do, which of course leads to them causing trouble nearly all the time. He sneaked a peak at the master’s new apprentice as he dug around in his nostril and thought that she looked happy that they were unloading the cart.

Mary-Ann watched the supplies being unloaded as the foreman pointed with one hand while the other was practically shoved up a nostril. It was the single most surreal thing she had ever seen. When all the normal supplies had been removed from cart the foreman finally removed his finger from his nose as he stopped the goblins from unloading the last few items. He grunted at the other goblins as he signed picking up the few remaining glass boxes, each of which contained a different type of slime, carefully and gently taking them in. Finally after getting nothing but blank stares he lifted one of the smaller boxes and carefully carried it in. When he returned he found all the other goblins just standing there starring at him. It was the first time Mary-Ann had ever seen a goblin facepalm and it was glorious. She imagined he had learned it from her master whom she had already seen perform the gesture on numerous occasions.

It proved too much for Mary-Ann as the foreman started jumping up and down yelling at his fellow goblins, she couldn’t help but break out laughing so hard she nearly peed herself. After a truly epic rant the foreman started carrying the boxes on his own as the other goblins started to wander off.

Taking pity on the diminutive creature, Mary-Ann picked up one of the larger boxes and set off to follow the foreman to the storage room. She was surprised by the weight of the box and had to cheat by using magic to be able to carry it. Looking in the box as she walked along she nearly tripped as she saw a large purple slime huddled into one corner. She knew very little of slimes and the different breads, but even she knew that a purple slime must be rare.

She knew from the other apprentices that her master was doing experiments involving green slimes so she was surprised to note that each of the boxes had a different species of slime held within. She also heard from her fellow apprentices that her master has gone through at least three other apprentices, each dying more tragically than the last. She only accepted his offer of apprenticeship because no one else would take her.

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Stacking the purple slime with the others in a corner of the storage room she turned to find the foreman looking at her oddly and sneezing loudly before heading back out to get another slime. He really was the strangest goblin she had ever seen.

As they carried in the last of the slimes she noticed that the foreman was constantly either picking his nose or sneezing. She almost lost it when he sneezed while carrying three small crates and wound up juggling them.

After carrying in the last of the materials from the cart the goblin turn to leave when Mary-Ann stopped him.

“Can you show me to my room?” she asked, still lost in the dusty old castle. The small creature grunted at her and then started to walk away. Hoping that he was leading her to her room she followed. “What’s your name?” she asked as they continued to make their way toward one of the small towers in the corner of the castle.

The goblin stopped briefly and clearly enunciated his name for the human female. It was doubtful they would understand his great name, but he still held hope.

“Bless you.” She said in response causing the goblin to puff out his chest believing that she understood the true meaning of his name. Thinking he had no name she decided to give him one, but growing up with the name Blowhard had twisted her sensibilities a bit. “I think we should call you…” she thought for a few seconds until he sneezed again. “How about Al Choo?” she asked, thinking that Ah Choo would be too obvious. “No, she said mostly to herself, Al Chew!” She smiled at her own cleverness as the goblin, now named Al Chew, just looked dejected. Apparently he wasn’t worthy of his great name.

She would have named him Sneezy, but that was very much a Dwarf name and they tended to sue anyone who used their names without permission. Of course dwarven legal cases generally involved lots of axes, hammers, and fire so must people tended to avoid appearing before a dwarven judge.

The room the newly named Al Chew led her to was actually quite large and it even had its own bathroom. It was actually several times bigger than any other place she had ever lived. Unfortunately it was a total mess with dirty clothes and empty wine bottles littering the floor and dirty dishes piled up on the desk and dresser. From the smell she was sure there was a dead rat or two in there as well.

Holding her hand over her nose she rushed across the room and threw the balcony door open, only to leap back as a pile of trash cascaded into the room. Nearly tripping she managed to make it to the window but it seemed to be stuck shut. She nearly coughed in the middle of casting a mage hand spell to force the window open which could have caused a serious backlash. The spell worked however and the window sprang open to let a breeze flow through the room which somehow made the stench worse.

Stepping back through the room to the hall way she pulled her wand and cast a quick and dirty wind spell to clear the room. She never would have quick cast the spell without her wand as the ten inch piece of rowan wood actually had the control and protection runes etched into it. Casting without protection was a good way to catch something nasty. The spell drew the air from the hallway and blew it through the room and it seemed to Mary-Ann as if she could see the stench blowing out of the room.

Looking back into the room she realized that her master’s last apprentice must have been a teenaged boy, that or the goblins lived here. The latter idea vanished when she turned around to find the goblin covering its mouth and nose while waving furiously with the other hand. It seemed that even the goblins wouldn’t live like this. Of course she couldn’t know that normal goblins lived just as bad, if not worse, but Al’s nose had become particularly sensitive since he had a slime forced up his nostril and he no longer lived with the other goblins but had instead made a nice clean nest in an empty room. In fact he was originally going to take Mary-Ann to a clean room, as the castle was mostly empty, but she disparaged his great name and stuck him with a strange human moniker.

But even as angry as he was he still showed mercy and only took her to the last apprentice’s room and not the forbidden chamber. It was sealed for good reason for even the remnant stench was enough to drive even normal goblins insane.

Having gotten his revenge, or at least as much of one as he would likely to get as a slave, Al shut the door before the smell could work its way into the rest of the castle and tugged on Mary-Ann’s arm before leading forward. She frowned as she followed him down the corridor until he stopped by a nearly identical door.

This time when he opened the door only the smell of dust and disuse wafted out. The room was dark with the door to the balcony and window both shut and covered with heavy curtains but a quick light spell brightened up the room. Mary-Ann would have been shocked if she had looked over at the goblin behind her as he copied her movement and attempted to mutter the words to the spell. The spell itself is simple, but even understanding the connection between the movements and the words should have been beyond any goblin.

The room was appointed the same as the last only this one only had tarps covering the furniture and a layer of dust covering them and everything else in the room. It was apparent that no one had been in this room in a very long time. Still it was far better than the last.

With a quick smile back at the mumbling goblin she went in and opened both the door and the window before casting a more advanced wind spell that thoroughly dusted the room. After looking around she turned and thanked Al before leaving to gather her things.

Al stood there staring after wondering what she had said, after all it was the first time anyone had ever thanked him for anything.