After Jax leaves, I remain frozen in place for a few minutes. A little uncomfortable at the thought of perusing someone else’s home. As I’m thinking of what to do, I realize just how tired I am. My head is pounding with a headache and my eyelids are heavy. In the face of my fatigue, I forget about my discomfort and lay down on the small bed. The mattress is firm, but the pillow is soft. I pull the thick quilt up to my neck, and curl onto my side, closing my eyes.

—-------------

I wake slowly, confused as to where I am. I stare at the ceiling of a log cabin. I smell a faint hint of lavender in the chilly air. Oh yeah, Jax’s house. I sit up and look around, but Jax is still gone. There is sunlight behind the curtains of the single window next to the bed. I must have slept through the morning. I rub the sleep from my eyes and stand, cracking my back and neck. He really does have a firm mattress, which seems fitting for the rugged forest man vibe.

Where did he go for so long? I head out the door of the cabin into the sunlight. It’s a surprisingly warm autumn day, so I strip off my sweater and tie it around my waist. I look around the clearing and see the same things when I first arrived. The cabin and a pile of firewood next to it, underneath a small, angled awning. Must be so it can stay dry. I wander to the edge of the clearing, thinking that maybe I can find something to entertain myself until Jax gets back. However, Jax’s warning crosses my mind.

“I can’t guarantee your safety if you do that.” I say to myself. What danger? I can only assume he doesn’t mean wild animals and other normal things. My mind goes back to last night, first to the vision I saw. I smile grimly, and head back to the cabin. I’d rather not take my chances, if it’ll be anything like that. I glance around the cabin again and notice that the pile of wood next to the fireplace is almost gone, so I start stacking some. Just as I’m placing the last log onto the pile, the door to the cabin opens. Jax stops in the doorway.

“Oh, you really didn’t have to do that, but thank you.” He says.

“You’re welcome. I was just bored while waiting.” I say, dusting the wood chips off my hands. Jax stands awkwardly for a few moments before speaking.

“I don’t mean to rush you, but I’d like to start your training now,” He says, and gives me a critical look, “assuming you feel up to it.” In response, I smile wearily.

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“Yeah, I’m alright now.” I say, with it only being a partial lie. I’m certainly a bit shaken up still, and I can feel the dull pain of a caffeine headache coming on, but,

“There’s no time to waste, is there?” I say, knowing that every second wasted means Emi could be in danger. Jax nods.

“Well, alright then, follow me.” He says, leading me out of the cabin, and into the woods.

“Don’t fall behind.” He says, as we walk deeper into the shady forest. The air is chillier in the shade of the trees, rather than the sun soaked clearing where Jax’s cabin is, so I pull on my sweater as we walk, doing my best to keep Jax in sight.

After a few minutes of walking, Jax stops suddenly and tilts his head to the side. His eyes are closed, and he looks deep in concentration. Then, he opens his eyes with a grunt and looks at me.

“You go alone from here,” he says, “just go straight that way,” he points to our right. “You’ll reach a clearing soon enough.” I wait a moment to see if he’ll elaborate.

“What’s there that I need?” I ask, confused as to how this is considered training.

“Your conduit.” Jax states. He draws himself up straighter, pulling his shoulders back and continues in a more formal tone.

“You’re prepared to endure more painful situations to help Emi, right?” He asks.

“Yes, of course.” I say, the answer coming to me immediately. I suppose there are times I can reach simple conclusions, rather than twisting myself up in a net of thoughts and concerns. I meet his eyes boldly, drawing my shoulders back so I’m no longer slouching. Jax’s eyes soften, and he smiles gently.

“Good, that’s the resolve you need. Now, go.” He says, directing me to the right again. I start walking a few steps confidently, before I slow down as I begin hesitating once more. Maybe I’m getting too full of myself. Maybe I should have asked Jax more about what’s coming. Why would I need all this resolve right now? I lull to a stop. In the first place, who am I to act all self-aggrandizing, as if I’m a hero that’s going to save Emi by sacrificing myself? In reality, I came here because it seemed like it’d be better than going back into work again. I turn around, intent to ask Jax what’s actually coming, and I can really handle it, when I see he’s no longer there.

A wind sweeps leaves across the ground at my feet and chills me, even through my sweater. I do a three–sixty turn, wondering if I wandered off in the wrong direction at some point, but no, I only walked straight where Jax told me to go. I didn’t go very far either. Did he leave immediately? I swallow and take a deep breath.

Well, If I had concerns before, I suppose I can’t do anything about them now. I clench my jaw and force myself to keep walking in the direction I started out on, even though I can feel the unsteadiness in my legs.