Chapter 3 - Post-traumatic stress disorder at The Party

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Ethan

Ethan walked down the hall of the apartment complex, his footsteps echoing against the polished floor. It was the lone floor of the penthouse apartment, and the muffled thump of bass-heavy music grew louder with each step. His hands were buried deep in the pockets of his jacket, and he felt a knot of apprehension tightening in his chest as he approached Joseph’s apartment.

Joseph… Ethan knew of him. He wasn’t sure if Joseph was an upperclassman or in his own grade, but he knew the name well enough. The first and only child of a state official, Joseph had the money and prestige to get into the academy easily. He was also the vice-captain of the school’s debate and politics team. Compared to the preppy bunch that filled the academy, Joseph was alright. But tonight, Ethan was an uninvited guest at his party.

The End of the World Party. That’s what Joseph had dubbed it, a grand celebration fueled by the collective belief that this could be it—the Martians would finally drop their payload, and the coalition would retaliate with devastating force. It made Ethan roll his eyes. He had lived through enough to know better. The Martians wouldn’t dare set foot on Earth soil again. This was just another chapter in the long, cold war between planets.

Ethan’s gaze dropped to his left hand, noticing the uncontrollable twitching of his fingers. He clenched his other hand around it, squeezing tight until the sensation passed. A sigh escaped his lips. These moments of strangeness, echoes of his past trauma, would flare up randomly. He shook his head, pushing the thoughts aside. Tonight wasn’t about him. He had school and work tomorrow, but David had called for help, and that was reason enough to be here.

Taking a deep breath, Ethan squared his shoulders and pushed open the door. The room inside was dark, the air thick with the smell of alcohol and sweat. Pairs of eyes turned toward him, the sudden light from the hall illuminating curious and inebriated faces before he quickly closed the door behind him. Regret washed over him, a fleeting wish that he had stayed home.

But David’s voice echoed in his mind, urging him on. He could almost hear his father’s words, a guiding strength from the past. "Never abandon a friend in need."

Ethan muttered under his breath, "My father." He began to weave his way through the crowd, the familiar faces of his peers mingling with those he assumed were upperclassmen or students from neighboring schools. The music pounded in his ears, each beat syncing with the nervous flutter in his chest.

His eyes scanned the room, searching for David amidst the throng of partygoers. The shadows and flashing lights made it difficult to see clearly, but he pressed on.

Joseph’s apartment was, for lack of a better word, trashed. It must have once been an impressive penthouse, with its spacious layout, neat and ornate furniture, and a large fireplace set into the wall. Now, it was a chaotic mess. Students from the academy filled every inch of space, red plastic cups littering the expensive couch and linens, staining the floor with splotches of deep reds and dark browns. The fireplace was empty, save for a drunken partygoer keeling over the opening, hurling his guts into it while his friend held him steady.

Ethan maneuvered through the throng of his peers, gently pushing them aside and muttering “Excuse me” to those too drunk to move. The thought of his father lingered in his mind, an unwelcome but persistent guest.

His father’s smile… He could remember it, but a spear of anxiety pierced his core. His eyes widened as a desperate and fevered chill overtook his body. He could see his father’s old military clothes, the fatigues he wore during the Alaskan campaign, but his face… he couldn’t remember his father’s face.

Someone bumped into him, snapping him out of his thoughts. “Joseph,” he muttered, shaking his head quickly. “Sorry about that.”

Joseph was between fifteen and seventeen years old. He was shorter, with a bit of fat around his face and waist. His coppery skin and shaved head were complemented by a pair of heavy glasses balanced on his nose. Joseph smiled, and Ethan could smell the alcohol on his breath before he even spoke.

“It’s all good, Ethan. I didn’t realize you were going to come. David told me you didn’t like things like this.”

Ethan shrugged, but Joseph’s smile coaxed a small smirk from him. “Yeah, David is kinda right. I don’t really do big gatherings and stuff like this.” Both boys turned their heads to the side, watching as a lone peer climbed the penthouse stairs, hollering curses while the crowd beneath him cheered. “Don’t get me wrong, I like a good drink and a smoke. But on my own time.”

“Oh shit,” Joseph cooed, his eyes widening with a chuckle. “I thought you were straight-edged as fuck. You smoke pot or just cigarettes? I’m dying for a cigarette right now.”

Ethan shook his head. “Nah, I never did any crazy drugs. I smoked weed a bit at David’s, but it’s too expensive.” He waved it off.

“Wait, you smoke nicotine, right?”

Ethan nodded, light dancing in Joseph’s eyes as he stared at him. “Bro, do you have any cigarettes on you? I’m killing for a cigarette right now.”

Ethan stared at him for a moment, debating it. He hardly knew Joseph, and cigarettes were something he had to pay extra for. He couldn’t buy them on his own, so he usually had to toss in a few extra dollars to get his fix. If it had been Jonas or Lena asking, he probably would’ve made an excuse, but Joseph…

Reaching into his pocket, Ethan pulled out a carton of cigarettes and handed one to Joseph. “Here,” he said, “but don’t make it a habit.”

Joseph grinned widely, snatching the cigarette like a lifeline. “Thanks, man. You’re a lifesaver.”

Ethan nodded, watching as Joseph lit the cigarette and took a long drag. The tension in the room seemed to ease just a bit, and Ethan allowed himself a moment of relaxation. He was still out of his element, but for now, at least, he felt a little more at ease.

There was something strange about him, an unsettling light in his eyes and a twisted gleam in his smile. Something within Ethan wanted Joseph to like him, a small part craving that validation, perhaps even friendship.

Joseph clapped his hands together, giggling like a child on Christmas morning. Ethan looked up and saw just how dilated Joseph’s eyes were. Most likely on other drugs, but it wasn’t any of his business. Joseph took the cigarette to his lips, and Ethan lit it up for him. Joseph inhaled deeply, the killing smoke filling his lungs before he expelled it in a heavy exhale. A second later, he began to cough violently into his fist.

He passed the cigarette back to Ethan, who followed suit, but he pursed his lips and formed rings, the smoke shooting out in concentric circles. Joseph watched with wide eyes and an open mouth, clapping drunkenly. “Ethan, you always find a way to surprise me, you know that!”

Ethan couldn’t help but smile. Joseph clung to his side, turning to the other partygoers. “Damn, it’s gonna suck to clean this all up. My father had to leave for a while, luckily there will be enough time to clean everything up.”

Ethan looked around, taking in the stained priceless furniture, the shattered ceramics, and the strange dents in the walls. “What about the stuff that can’t be cleaned?” Joseph turned toward him, his eyes wide and mouth shut, making Ethan feel uneasy. “What about the ceramics and stuff? I’m pretty sure I just saw Dobbs break that vase. That must’ve been worth a ton of money. Are you going to replace all that?”

Joseph turned away, shrugging. “My father isn’t here,” he murmured. “He’s not even here enough to realize if something priceless like that is missing in the first place. He’s got the kind of money just to piss away.”

There was a melancholy in his voice, a stark contrast to the happy and confident student leader Ethan knew. Now, he was dealing with a different side of Joseph he hadn’t seen before. Joseph must’ve noticed him staring.

“Sorry about that,” Joseph quickly apologized, Ethan not even sure what he was apologizing for. “Here I am talking about my dad, and I know about your dad and what you guys went through in Alaska. Hey, I am really sorry about that.”

Ethan’s eyes widened at the sudden words, but he shook his head. “Listen, you don’t have to be sorry, Joseph. It’s no big deal.”

“Yeah, I know, but I feel all rotten and shit now. Here I am, bringing up family stuff and even taking a cigarette from you. I really am a mess.”

Ethan sighed, feeling the weight of the conversation shift. “We’re all a mess, Joseph. Everyone’s got their own shit to deal with.”

Joseph nodded slowly, taking another drag from the cigarette. “You’re right, man. It’s just… sometimes it feels like too much, you know?”

Ethan gave a half-smile. “Yeah, I know.” He glanced around the wrecked apartment again. “But maybe we can help each other clean up the mess, one step at a time.”

Joseph’s face softened, a genuine smile replacing the earlier manic grin. “Thanks, Ethan. I appreciate it…you’re alright.”

Ethan nodded, the beginnings of a tentative friendship forming between them amidst the chaos of the party.

Ethan shook his head, a faint smirk playing on his lips. “You know, if you want to repay me, I’m not really here to party. I could use some help finding David.”

Joseph nodded, “Alright, I got you. Just follow me. I know where Lena and Jonas are.”

Joseph waved for him to follow, slowly parting through the stream of drunk or drugged-up peers. Ethan and Joseph took puffs and turns with the cigarette. Then, suddenly...

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Ethan’s eyes widened. His hand acted on instinct, connecting with a wrist and quickly pulling the person up. “Sorry about that, I just tripped and fell and…”

The wrist and arm were thin. It was dark, but the faint, flickering lights were enough to see by. Maybe that was why it took him so long to realize it was Charlotte.

His breath caught in his throat. His eyes were wide as he quickly released his grasp. “Sorry about that,” he stammered.

Charlotte brought her hands together, her eyes narrowed, and he could smell the alcohol on her breath.

She was around his age, with porcelain skin dotted with freckles and a doll-like face. Short raven-colored hair extended down to her neck, framing her beautiful jade-colored eyes.

He could already feel his face heating up. He averted his gaze, his hands stretching down to the base of his neck. His heart pounded against his chest as he...

She walked away. His eyes were wide as he watched her part through the crowd. He took a deep breath, expelling the air from his stomach. His crush, the girl he’d silently watched and felt such a deep infatuation for—he had the perfect moment to speak to her, only to let it slip away because he couldn’t seize the opportunity.

Joseph was staring at him, a small smile on his face as Ethan turned to meet his gaze. “You’re quite obvious, Ethan,” Joseph said as they continued walking.

Ethan didn’t speak. Maybe that was what Joseph took as a cue to continue. “I don’t know why you only talk to David, honestly. Sure, I know about what happened in your past, but you were low-key a celebrity when you came here,” he turned towards Ethan with a smirk, his hands out and clenched into fists of authority. “Ethan, the boy who lived. Not only survived a Martian invasion at eleven years old but a young militia member who helped take the fight to the Martians. You and your father were able to beat back the Martian advance till they left our planet. Isn’t that something to be proud of?”

Joseph didn’t know how Ethan would react. Maybe it was the drugs or alcohol that had messed with his system. However, he only saw Ethan’s scowl. His eyes were wide, staring holes into Joseph’s back.

“Really, is anything you just said something to be proud of?” Ethan’s mouth formed into a snarl, his gaze intense. Joseph felt the ebbing of fear etch through him. “My father and everyone I served with died on Alaskan soil, fighting an enemy from the stars. Look at what I’ve become. Is there anything to take pride in that?”

Joseph stared at him, both he and Ethan falling into an uneasy silence. Joseph slowly realized he had overstepped a boundary, while Ethan silently regretted taking it too far.

A bit later, they encountered Lena and Jonas, the pair snuggled up together in a clearing within the crowd. The smell of pot radiated off them, a bong planted by their sides.

“Jonas…Lena,” Ethan’s voice rose as he made his way toward them. “Listen, I just came to find David and take him home.”

He now understood why David had called him. Lena’s jade-colored eyes locked onto him first as she groggily sat up. “Look, Jonas,” she spoke with a smile. “It’s the freak.”

“Lena…” Jonas sparked up, shaking his head as he turned toward Ethan.

“Good seeing you too, Lena,” Ethan spoke with his own smirk, turning toward Jonas as the boy slowly rose, slightly pushing the girl off him. Jonas took a deep breath and pointed toward a lone boy hunched over on a chair. The lights were so dim that Ethan could hardly see. “That’s where David is?”

Jonas nodded.

“Thanks, Jonas.” Ethan waved, realizing that Joseph was still following him.

Ethan made his way toward the figure, looking at him for a moment. He wanted to make sure he was waking up his slightly drunk friend, not touching some random dude he didn’t know.

He spotted David’s sunbaked skin and curly black hair. He could see the rise and fall of his breath and tell he was heavily snoring. Ethan rolled his eyes as he grasped David’s shoulder, then began to rapidly shake him awake.

“What the…what the hell!” David snapped, his eyes wide as he lurched to the side. However, the anger quickly faded. “Ethan, what are you doing here?”

Ethan sighed. “I came here to pick you up and bring you back home,” he said, seizing his shoulder tighter as David followed, a grin spreading across his lips. Ethan rolled his eyes. “Damn it, what are you on?”

“Molly,” David said, laughing heartily.

Ethan groaned, gripping him tighter to keep him steady. “Jesus, David,” he snapped. “What the hell. First off, I told you not to do anything else, and Christ…fucking molly?”

Ethan grabbed him and pulled him close. They were going to leave. Ethan took a good look around the place and sneered. He had work, school, and other shit to deal with tomorrow. Now, David was wasting his time when they had to go.

“Hey, Ethan. Why don’t you just stay for a bit longer?”

He turned around to see Joseph.

“Listen, it's an end-of-the-world party and this world is getting kinda crazy,” Joseph said, stretching out his arms to encompass the party. He welcomed the sounds, the emotions, the vibe. “Wouldn’t it be a waste just to leave on the final night of our lives?”

Ethan just stared at him. The final night of their lives. If this was it, what would he have accomplished? The question lingered, unanswered, as a figure stormed through the crowd.

Neil, a hulking teenager from the academy’s football team, was making his way through, fevered determination in his eyes and an unhealthy mix of alcohol and drugs coursing through his veins. The long blond hair was the first thing Ethan noticed as Neil pushed past, bumping into him and David. It was obvious Neil was in a mood, and Ethan decided it was time to leave.

Sure, Joseph was cool, but Ethan had responsibilities—his family, his academy, his job. They were mundane, but they mattered. Next time, maybe...

Lost in thought, Ethan missed David’s warning. “The hell, Neil. I was standing here!”

Neil's dark brown eyes blazed with primal rage as he snapped toward David, who backed away in fear. Standing at five foot ten, David was dwarfed by both Neil and Ethan, who were over six feet tall.

“Shit,” Joseph muttered under his breath, a look of defeat crossing his features. It was clear he wasn't going to intervene. That look of defeat—Ethan hated it.

Neil barreled toward David, who raised his hands in surrender. Ethan didn’t need to think. He threw himself between them. Joseph's eyes widened. “You really are something, Ethan,” he murmured.

“You got something to say, David?” Neil snapped, anger frothing from his lips. “What, you don’t got anything to say? Fucking pussy!” His voice boomed over the music, which was abruptly cut off as their peers crowded around, forming a circle.

Ethan felt Neil's drunk breath against his face. David hid behind him, seeking refuge in his shadow as Ethan scanned for an escape. But there was none.

“Chill, damn bro,” David snapped back.

Neil responded by shoving Ethan into David. The force sent Ethan sprawling onto his back. He quickly scrambled up, shocked by the sheer strength of Neil's push.

“You don’t want to do this, Neil,” Ethan said, trying to keep his voice calm and steady. But Neil’s eyes were wild, and his fists clenched.

“Oh, I think I do,” Neil sneered, stepping closer. “You think you can just walk in here and act like you own the place? Fuck you.”

Ethan stood his ground, his mind racing. He didn’t want to fight, but he wouldn’t let Neil hurt David. “I don’t want any trouble, Neil. Just let us leave.”

Neil laughed, a harsh, mocking sound. “Trouble? You’ve already found it.”

They were nearly swallowed by the crowd. Ethan wasn’t weak, but he wasn't the strongest eighteen-year-old either. He was skinny, though his manual labor job had given him a decent build. The smoking and inconsistent eating habits didn't help. Yet, Neil’s push almost threw him off his feet.

How weak had he really let himself become?

“Neil, just relax. David didn’t mean anything by it… he’s drunk and high as shit right now,” Ethan said, his voice steady despite the tension.

The words flew from his lips, but Neil wasn’t fazed. In fact, he seemed even angrier.

Neil grimaced. “Fuck you two. We got David here just for diversity, and your freak ass is here because of the war. So, a diversity case and a Martian freak!” His voice rang out, ending in a loud, derisive laugh.

No one laughed. No one intervened. Ethan looked toward the crowd, spotting Joseph, Lena, and Jonas among them. They looked sobered up and scared for David’s safety, but they just stood there, doing nothing.

He had seen them all hang out together. Wasn’t this their friend in danger? Why weren’t they doing anything?

Ethan sneered and shook his head. "No matter, nothing’s changed since Alaska. In the end, it’s just you that you can rely on," he thought.

When he turned back to Neil, he heard it. A soft voice reached his ears. “Leave them alone, Neil.”

Charlotte. Her small frame pushed through the crowd, her eyes narrowed and hands on her hips as she stared down the large football player. Little Charlotte standing up to Goliath.

Ethan was shocked at first, but then he started to realize something. Charlotte was very smart, smarter than a lot of people here, and she was a girl. She must’ve thought Neil wouldn’t press her. Even Ethan thought Neil wouldn’t do anything to her.

He was wrong.

“Shut your fucking bitch mouth!” Neil snapped at her, diverting his attention away from Ethan and David. His eyes locked onto Charlotte, who stared back in fear. “You’re so fucking annoying, Charlotte!”

Neil grabbed her arm, and a gasp rippled through the crowd. His lips curled into a dry smile as he stared at her. “What, got nothing to say?”

He grabbed her tighter, lifting her onto her tiptoes as she struggled within his grip. Ethan saw it—the tears welling in her eyes.

He saw red. He didn’t even realize it, but he just acted. He knew it was stupid, but his father’s teachings echoed in his brain. Neil was stronger and faster than him, even in his drunken state.

“To destroy a stronger enemy, you need to either combine together…or shatter them with a stronger force.”

It was foolish, and he hardly knew this girl, but...

Ethan lunged at Neil, his fists aiming for the larger boy’s face. The first punch connected, sending a shockwave of pain through Ethan’s hand, but he didn’t stop. He followed with another punch, then another, trying to force Neil to release Charlotte.

Neil staggered, momentarily stunned by the ferocity of the attack. Charlotte fell to the ground, scrambling away from the confrontation.

“You think you can take me on, freak?” Neil roared, recovering quickly. He swung back, his fist colliding with Ethan’s jaw and sending him reeling.

Ethan tasted blood but refused to back down. He steadied himself and squared his shoulders, ready for the next blow.

Ethan knew he couldn’t win, and as the blow sent him spiraling, he fell onto the table. His eyes narrowed as he saw it—a lifeline. The thumping of war overclocked everything.

“Stronger... force,” he muttered, grinding his teeth together as the words slipped from him.

The party was fading away, and he saw in brief flashes the Alaskan forest. He grasped a bottle of liquor from the table and slammed it into the side of Neil's head. Neil's body collapsed as the ruptured glass rang out, echoing along their eardrums. Lips unlatched, and wide mouths gasped in shock.

“What...” Neil muttered as he collapsed.

But Ethan was running on adrenaline. His teeth were clenched and gritted together as he felt everything fade away. He stood perched over Neil, his hands in fists as his breath shook through his very core. His eyes were wide and feral like an animal.

He was back there... in Alaska. He felt eleven again as the walls and floor of the room faded into nothingness. His feet clamped down onto harsh snow as the cold wind trickled along his brow. Shatter, destroy, and kill the enemy!

He slammed his boot into Neil’s face as the boy cried out in pain. His fist descended instantly as he attacked like a wild animal, like a wolf. No, wolves were noble... he descended onto him like a diseased street dog. No honor, no grace, only the desire to...

“Ethan, that’s enough!”

Joseph, Jonas, David, and two others grasped around his body, trying to lift him up. His eyes were wide as he fought against their hold. Yet, he saw him. Bloodied and hurt, coughing as his teammates rushed to his side while the crowd stared.

His hands were covered in blood as he watched Neil whimper in pain. He turned to Charlotte... staring at him. Her eyes were wide, her mouth parted. She was frozen.

Ethan was back. He could hardly remember even doing anything to Neil; he had just reacted on instinct. For a second, it felt so real—being back in that mindset in Alaska as he struggled to survive, fighting against the Martians and...

“We have to leave.”

David’s voice graced his ear as he took him by the hand, and the pair left the apartment. Once, he was fearful of entering the apartment, graced by the heavy music. Now, he was with David, and the music was off. He had completely lost himself in there, and most likely alienated himself from everyone.

He looked towards David, who had sobered up from the encounter. He was breathing deeply as Ethan turned towards him. “Christ, Ethan,” David spoke. “I know Neil deserved it, but shit, you gotta learn when it’s over, alright?”

He turned towards Ethan, only to be shaken by the sight. Ethan was crying, his face static as tears slipped down his cheeks. He glanced at his bloodied hands.

“David, what’s wrong with me?”