“Yes? Wait, you got Watanabe? This time the right one? It’s been a whole entire day since I requested him! No, it does matter that it has been an entire day, a whole year has passed in the world he was supposed to go to! He’s… He’s already arriving? Can’t you-” Beep. Beep. Beep.

The TIA employee heaved a sigh as the other side ended the call. Those morons over at HR… Crap, I gotta get ready for my goddess shtick. She quickly changed her formal suit over to a pompous white dress she used for such occasions. She moved her desk, which had a computer and a landline phone on it, to a far-off location in the white void (which was actually just a really big room painted white). She brought over a gold-colored chair she had bought from a certain Swedish furniture manufacturer which had a contract where TIA employees would get 25% off from their purchases.

She sat on her chair and began waiting for (Haruhito) Watanabe. Soon, a generic-looking Japanese man arrived to the scene by suddenly popping into existence. Unlike our generic looking hero, Haruto Watanabe, this Watanabe was slightly younger.

Like other generic protagonists, this young Watanabe was in high school before he had died a few minutes ago.

“Haruhito Watanabe, welcome to the afterlife. Unfortunately, you’ve died. It might’ve been short, but your life is now over.”

The newly arrived Watanabe stared at the room, making a cliché monologue about how he was dead after an accident. I hate how these otherworlders love to just pause and monologue, get on with it already! I don’t have all day you know!

“Ah! Goddess, am I like really, really dead? Is this, like, really one of these isekai things?!” asked the young Watanabe. “Bruh, it’s gonna suck so much if I’m dead fr.”

Are we even speaking the same language, she thought. She extended her arms, making a pose like she was a goddess absolving young Watanabe of his sins. “Yes, young one, you are dead. Now, I have an offer to make you. You know and love video games, right?”

“Yeah, I got plenty of them on my phone.” replied young Watanabe.

Your phone? How the hell do you get games on a phone, she thought, trying to imagine playing anything on the landline phone. “Right, so we need someone who likes electronic entertainment like you to… Umm…” Crap, the other Watanabe has already saved the world! What do I tell this kid?

“Umm… To… We need someone to protect the realm from monsters!” she said. “Yes, the Demon King is gone, but we need someone like you to protect the kingdom!”

“I get to use my epic gamer skills? Bruh, that’s so epic.” replied young Watanabe.

“Right, now choose a cheat skill that’ll be your reincarnation bonus.” she said handing young Watanabe a tablet that had an interface chock full of broken skills.

“Wow, these are so epic… I want to use magic, so gimme [Infinite Mana].” said young Watanabe after few minutes of browsing.

Unauthorized tale usage: if you spot this story on Amazon, report the violation.

“Okay…” she replied taking the tablet back from young Watanabe. “Then be on your way, brave hero!”

“Cya later auntie!” replied Watanabe as he suddenly popped out of existence as quickly as he had popped back in.

Bloody whippersnappers, I’m getting too old for customer relations, she thought observing young Watanabe disappear.

----------------------------------------

“Hey, don’t stand in front of the street you idiot!” bellowed a truck driver as he honked his horn.

What the, thought young Watanabe as he stood aside. This looks nothing like a fantasy world.

Everything had changed in just one year. The generic fantasy buildings were still there, but in front of them were an army of vehicles that didn’t fit the rest of the setting at all. It was like as if some otherworldly invader had granted knowledge of internal combustion to a bunch of medieval high fantasy folk.

Young Watanabe had no idea of what to do, so he decided to get help from the first person he could spot. “Sir, could you help me please?” asked young Watanabe while he approached an old man on the sidewalk.

“Hmm, yes? What do you need?” replied the old man.

“Umm, I just arrived here. Could you help me find the Adventurer’s Guild?” said young Watanabe. He decided to go with a fantasy staple to start off the conversation.

“Adventurer’s Guild? It was abolished a year ago by the empress.” replied the old man before he took a closer look at young Watanabe. “Wait a second… What is your name, young man?”

“Haruhito Watanabe.”

“Wa- Watanabe?!” exclaimed the man in utter shock. “Guards! Watanabe has returned!”

But I have never come here in the first pla-

Two men armed with modern assault rifles that clashed with their plate armor suddenly rushed into the scene. “Watanabe?! Bob, use [Identify] on him, quickly!” shouted one of the guards.

“He is indeed the real one, sir! I’ve also identified a cheat skill, sir!” replied the other guard. “By the orders of Her Imperial Majesty God-Empress Tangerina I, you are ordered to come to her court!”

Before young Watanabe could object, the guards apprehended him and put him in a guard truck that was parked nearby.

Why was I cursed with such a common surname; what are they going to do with me, thought young Watanabe in fear.

The truck came to a stop after travelling for a few minutes. Watanabe was then quickly escorted by the guards inside a grand palace. The people in the palace looked at him in shock as they travelled.

After another long few minutes of travel the guards entered a gate, which opened up to a massive throne room that was probably the most decadent throne room in the entire universe(s). It was laid with gold, platinum, diamonds, every precious fur and scale…

“Halt! Apprehend him no further!” shouted the girl on the throne. She had blonde hair tied up to make twin drills, along with an orange tunic and frilly blue skirt combo. She dressed too plainly compared to the throne room she was occupying. “So, you’ve come back again?”

“Eh? No, I’ve never been here.” replied young Watanabe.

“Right… Because you’re Haruhito Watanabe, not Haruto Watanabe. I can see how the guards have made this mistake.” said the girl as she sighed. “Anyways, you’re dead and now you need to do something to return back, right?”

“How- Right, you probably know from that other Watanabe. Bruh, this whole isekai setting has been kinda ruined…” said young Watanabe. “No, I can’t really return back.”

“So… You have one cheat skill, [Infinite MP] … You come from the same place as this other Watanabe, right?”

Young Watanabe nodded in response. “But I do not personally know anyone named Haruto Watanabe.”

Tangerina suddenly seemed excited once she learned that young Watanabe came from Japan. “Then, do you have any amazing technology or magic that you can teach us?!”

“I can… I can make mayonnaise?” replied young Watanabe.

“What is this ‘mayonnaise’? Teach us!” exclaimed Tangerina.

Thusly began young Watanabe’s adventures, where he became the best (and only) mayonnaise vendor in the world with the approval of the god-empress.