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The Dungeon Calls for a Sage
1-35: Negotiating a Negotiator

1-35: Negotiating a Negotiator

Archimedes watched Anther, who was hugging his friends on the first floor. Neither of those two knew why he was crying, but they were quietly comforting him anyway. Theoria gazed at the trio of elves from a few paces away with her tail and ears drooping.

The dungeon core attempted to run some probability calculations on how likely Anther was to convince his parents to allow him to treat their son’s illness, but as he had never met either of them, there was a significant margin of error, amplified significantly by his general lack of understanding of outsider psychology.

In his experience, the more desperate a situation, the less predictable people were.

On top of that, Anther’s condition was serious enough that he could (with a low probability) die of a catastrophic seizure at any moment. If possible, the dungeon wanted to keep an eye on him at all times, but his influence only reached so far.

While going over his options and the risks involved with each, a commonality appeared that raised his odds.

He broadcast his realization to all of his dungeon monsters. “I need someone who can talk to go out with Anther. Help him convince his parents to let me treat him.”

On the third floor, working hard to direct the dungeon’s architectural endeavors, Zemnes shook his head disappointedly. “I am busy.”

“Me! Me! Pick me!” Alphio, sunbathing on the second floor, jumped up and down with his hands in the air. “I want to go outside and keep little Anthy safe!” His face was tear streaked from eavesdropping on the diagnosis earlier.

“You’re busy too, you leafhead!” Merina yelled at him. “Busy making ether for Archy!” The little blonde mandrake folded her arms and stuck her chin up. “And if either of us should go, it’s me. You’ll just follow him like a bad rumor and cry.”

From inside her personal living space, hidden in the walls on the second floor, Lilith sat up on her couch and spoke to the ceiling.

“Hey, it’s me: the one you banned from going outside ever. Just wanted to point out that I’m literally doing nothing right now, I can talk, and I have more social experience out there than the rest of you combined. Send me. I’ll keep a good eye on the kid.”

Archimedes pondered her suggestion. Although he had been slowly mending his relationship with the proto-human, she was still the one he was least comfortable sending out of his sight. He hadn’t done anything to her that would get him blacklisted… unless they added his offenses to the list.

It was very iffy, and it would do his reputation no favors if word got out.

On the other hand, Lilith had displayed more loyalty and more of a craving to belong than he had expected when he created her. The outside wasn’t the most comfortable environment for dungeon monsters either, according to Thesia and Theoria’s memories. There was a decent chance that Lilith would do her job well and come back to the dungeon.

But the ambiguity of the word “chance” made Archimedes uncomfortable, and he didn’t want to put Anther’s life at the mercy of it.

The dungeon peered into the mind of the proto-human, searching the neural pathways for her thoughts and motivations. He found very little love or care for the dying elf boy, but also a pounding heart and sweating palms: a desperate hope to free herself from this life as an outcast in the dungeon… and be fully accepted into its community.

So she doesn’t care who she’s with as long as she belongs? Archimedes thought to himself. No wonder she ended up part of a group of criminals.

“Well?” Lilith tried to sound aloof, but Archimedes could sense she was impatient and anxious from his lack of reply.

He accepted the olive branch she extended to him.

“Alright. Lilith, you’ll do it.”

She stood up in a hurry. “Really?! You don’t mind letting me outside?” She coughed into her fist. “I mean, aren’t you worried I’ll tell them all the shit you put me through and run away?”

“Do you intend to do that?” he asked her calmly.

Lilith pouted. “No. I just want a breath of fresh air for once. I’ll do the job right.”

Archimedes watched the flickering thought of running away cross her mind, but it was weak, and again, the outside ought to feel less pleasant than she remembered.

“And you seem sincere, so I’ll choose to trust you this time. Please keep Anther safe and come back to us.”

He watched the hints of doubt and escapism disappear, regretting that he didn’t choose the gentle approach with Lilith in the first place. If this went well, perhaps he could send her outside more often. She might bring back new puzzle ideas with her.

“Alright. Then I’ll go.”

Lilith blinked in amazement at how well her suggestion had gone over. She kept checking over her shoulder as she made her way to the first floor, growing doubts and fears of some kind of catch prickling her mind. Yet she took a deep breath and cheered for Thesia in her heart, praising the slime for making this stubborn dungeon more flexible.

***

The most important thing to Archimedes right now was Anther’s survival.

It was certainly true that Archimedes was manipulating Lilith’s acceptance-seeking nature, but his social toolbox wasn’t exactly overflowing. As long as he got the result he wanted and she was happy, that had to be enough for now.

Stolen novel; please report.

Vow came out of nowhere with a surprisingly harsh question—at least compared to how she usually was.

Wouldn’t you usually tell me not to do something like that? the dungeon questioned.

Archimedes sighed. The others would still remember. If she found out about it through them, we would end up back at square one. Even if I erased everyone’s memories about it, they might still find out through my memories. I can’t erase my own memories or I’d probably just repeat the same mistake. Every option would just be a waste of time and mana. At least now I’ve only wasted time.

Is it just me, or are you talking more lately?

A channel between here and where? Do you have a main body somewhere?

Archimedes possibly knew more about Vow than anyone else across the universe, but frankly, she was still a mystery to him. In the past, he had been afraid of what kind of answer he would get if he asked about her, but now he was just curious about his friend.

No physical center at all? Archimedes could scarcely imagine what that would feel like.

It must get on your nerves when I complain about wanting a different body. I’m sorry, but I can’t help wanting what I want.

The windows were steadily becoming fainter, so Archimedes figured Vow was at the end of her rope.

We’ll talk more later, he said.

Archimedes turned his attention back to the third floor, which had been rapidly progressing throughout his conversation with Vow. He watched Helios waving his fluffy front arms adorably while laying down little magic formations throughout the labyrinthine library. This floor had been designed cooperatively between Zemnes and Lilith, since the architecture itself was half of the puzzle.

Sadly, Archimedes didn’t have enough unique books to fill up all the shelves. Countless copies of the same works had been produced just to make up for volume.

He would have to rely on the generous donations of outsiders to fix that.

***

While Archimedes was calling for volunteers elsewhere in the dungeon, on the first floor, Myla spoke softly while patting Anther on the back.

“Hey, hey, what happened?”

The boy explained nothing, simply shaking his head and hiding his puffy face against her chest. She looked at Kasser, who shrugged.

“I don’t know what happened, but do you wanna go home?” Kasser asked.

While sniffling, Anther nodded, and his two friends quietly guided him toward the exit. They moved ponderously, especially Anther. Before reaching the exit, a sudden rustling came from behind them, and a woman emerged from the foliage.

“Another adventurer?” Myla muttered, furrowing her brow. She thought it was strange that they had missed each other until now.

Kasser noticed that the stranger didn’t quite look like any friend he’d heard about, and he subtly nocked an arrow. “Are you a friend?”

“I-I’m a friend! I’m a friend!”

The stranger held her hands up and hurriedly spoke. She had long, straw-colored hair, sky blue eyes, and a peachy skintone. Her ears were round, and she didn’t have any horns or a tail visible. She was dressed in simple brown clothes.

“My name is Lilith. I live here.”

Kasser and Myla shared a surprised look, and Anther finally lifted his head, wiping his eyes against his sleeve.

“Are you a mandrake?” the boy murmured.

“A mandrake?” Myla exclaimed. “Aren’t those little root monsters?”

“No, the mandrakes here are big.”

“I’m a human,” Lilith told them, leaving off the awkward “proto” preface. She straightened her posture and gazed hard at the elves in determination. “The dungeon wanted someone to go with you, since he was worried about you, and I volunteered. Is that fine?”

Anther slowly separated himself from Myla and Kasser and nodded. “Yeah, that’s fine.”

Lilith exhaled in relief and followed the trio outside. With each step she took, she felt her heart pounding harder. Anxiety nearly smothered her, and she couldn’t help but hesitate right before the boundary.

Was Archimedes just pretending to humor me? Is this all a trap? Would he dare to kill me in front of the elf he likes so much?

The next step would mean either freedom or death.

“Lilith?” Anther looked over his shoulder and called out to her. “Aren’t you coming?”

The proto-human sucked in one big breath and stepped, and the weight of the world came off her shoulders.

I’m free?

But almost immediately after, she discovered how miserable freedom was.

Lilith used to bathe in mana and ether every waking moment. Compared to the dense dungeon air, the outside was barren. She felt tired, sluggish, and out of breath.

The sudden emptiness in the back of her mind, where the other dungeon creatures used to constantly have a presence, was remarkably lonely. The world around her and the sky above her head were so vast that she didn’t know what to do with them.

A faint pulsing light and warmth coming from the core in her chest was the only thing anchoring her in this world. She found herself clutching it in terror.

“Lilith?”

Anther called for her again. He and his friends had all stopped to wait for her. Lilith swallowed her anxiety back and nodded at them. She made her feet start moving again. After talking herself up so much, there was no way she could give up and go back to the dungeon so soon. It would be pathetic.

Right, I can get used to this feeling, just like how I got used to being in the dungeon.

“Um, excuse me…” the elf watchman by the entrance came over to investigate the four. They looked rather suspicious standing around like they were, and he didn’t recognize one of them. “Are you a monster from the dungeon?”

“No.” Lilith shook her head, brushed her hair behind her ear. “At least not the kind that fights people. I’m a human.”

The guard tilted his head. “A what?”

Lilith sighed dejectedly, wondering—and not for the first time—what in the world the dungeon was thinking when it made her the way she was. “I wish I knew.”