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The Diary of a Transmigrator
Chapter 39: Painful Awakening

Chapter 39: Painful Awakening

Gleaming towers of glass and steel rose high over familiar streets, awash with the ruddy gold of the setting sun.

Unpleasant chemical odors synthesized from too many people and machines penetrated my nostrils. The haze of smog clouded and burnt my eyes. The oppressive noise was a rumble, felt as much as heard.

My feet were heavy in clunky shoes, each step thudding loudly, even over the sounds of the city. Trapped in dense, heavy clothing, my body couldn’t move as I wanted. I was encased in layers of performance, armor that helped me blend in, even as it suffocated me.

Even under the synthetic fibers of my synthetic self my body felt wrong, too big, too blocky, like a crudely sculpted impression of a person. It wasn’t me. Everything was fake, down to the bone. A prison of my own flesh.

All around eyes watched me, staring out from empty shells that moved by rote, speaking words I couldn’t understand, living in a language utterly foreign to me.

For all my artifice, it was impossible to replicate.

They knew. They could see through me. They could tell I wasn’t one of them.

One by one they halted in their dance as they recognized the intruder among them, defying their choreography, empty faces contorting into hollow rage at the sight.

I tried to walk faster, to leave behind the accusing, hateful glares.

The crowd parted around me, until ahead, through the tide of alienation, I saw a figure silhouetted against the horizon.

A person, towering over me. A skyscraper with a face.

Our connection was immediate and certain in its repugnance.

“Boy.”

The word slapped across my face, then settled as a dead weight atop my shoulders, crushing me down into the asphalt.

“The hell’s wrong with you? You trying to humiliate me? Just do as I say! Be normal!”

The voice was the rumbling sounds of the city, converging, millions of voices, machines and organizations speaking through a single shared thrum.

“Be a man you little freak! Stop being different, like some sort of pervert! It’s disgusting! This is why your mother left!”

Shame suffocated all thought as my father stared down at my wretched, agonized form, pressed to the ground.

“I’m ashamed to call you my son, let alone my apostle.”

Darkness deepened around the towering figure, spreading out to swallow and consume me in roiling liquid nightmares.

“You cannot escape what you are, boy. You are nothing but a cursed aberration, and that is all you shall ever be. They will never accept you. They will never love you. No-one could, once they know the truth.”

Pain tore into my body, penetrating tendrils that dragged me down under the surface of the seething oil and into black water, my flesh so dreadfully heavy I feared it would be ripped from my bones.

I was falling again.

Why did I keep falling in my dreams?

With a jolt the pain became very real, as hard surfaces pressed to my skin.

There was a metallic taste in my mouth, the stench of blood thick on the humid air.

Every inch of me ached, oppressive weight pinning me to whatever floor I lay on. My body felt utterly drained, devoid of all energy and strength, there mere act of my bones resisting gravity a painful one.

All the same I smiled.

Through the pain my shape was revealed. My true shape.

Gone was the crude cage from my nightmare. This body was mine, was me.

Opening my eyes cracked a seal of dried blood, to reveal hazy sight. As they struggled to focus a wall came into view, metal, with angular lines and grooves which felt familiar. The space was dark, dull red illumination washing in through a window.

If the sun was setting then was I back in the city once more?

But no, I’d left that city… that world behind. It wasn’t my choice, but I had no regrets. Earth was long gone to me. Arcadia was home now.

Events connected, the causal chain aligning as I remembered what had happened since; meeting the Harpies, befriending Aellope and the others at the Eyrie, the coming war, my foolish defiance of Ael’s wishes and my devastating defeat and fall. The journey through the Underworld. Entering the ruins of a forgotten civilization. Discovering the tomb of a dead god, atop a tear in reality.

A tear I closed.

Finally all made sense again. I knew where I was. Who I was.

I was Safkhet and she was me. No-one else.

I pushed myself up with a groan, arms trembling at the exertion of peeling myself away from the puddle of congealing blood that stuck me to the floor of the flight cube. I found a surface behind me, likely the desk, and propped myself up against it.

At the far end of the room Echo’s machinery stood, thankfully undamaged, a faint glow behind the silvery metal sheet and in the circuits the only sign of activity.

Checking myself over I found I still wore the flexible mushroom-leather suit, the strips stretched over my curves, leaving my head, hands and feet bare. It was a mess with my own blood now, damaged in several places from the fights it had endured, but it would suffice.

My hair was a horrible sticky tangle, but I just did my best to get it out of my eyes.

Looking around, the flight cube remained dark. What I had so optimistically imagined was a sunset was too dark and uniform to be the light of a star. It seemed to come from all directions, refracting off a stone ceiling visible through the window, confirming that we were indeed still in the Underworld.

I tried to stand, and gave immediately up as my legs collapsed under the meager weight of a single girl. The weakness in my muscles was shocking after my time in Arcadia. My strength had abandoned me.

So too had my mana. The overflowing essence always seeping through my form had dried up to no more than a wisp, deep within me.

That was more frightening than my physical frailty. From great, painful experience I had faith in my body to recover, but never had I felt so drained of magical power. How could I be sure it would ever return? Was this a permanent injury?

I’d been warned that when a normal human ran out of mana they would collapse, but Harpies had assured me that their essence would return in time, and with it their strength. No-one had told me that I could use so much mana that I bled from my eyes and mouth then passed out, only to awake still totally devoid of strength. But then I was far from normal, and I hadn’t just used up all my essence casting a spell. I’d overloaded myself in commanding the Golden Sepulchre, forcibly rewriting some small part of reality to impose my will on the world. That was in a whole other dimension to conjuring too many fireballs.

I would have asked Echo, but I doubted they’d know any better than I, assuming they were still speaking to me at all after what I’d done.

It occurred to me that they were oddly silent, despite my activity.

The device which housed the sentient spell seemed to be powered off.

I was reluctant to rouse them after misleading and using them thus far, but even if they were angry they deserved an explanation and an apology. And some help getting back to the capital… if that was even where they wanted to go.

“Echo?” I asked hesitantly.

Speaking was painful, my throat burning, my tongue sluggish to form the hoarsely whispered words.

There was no answer from the machine.

“Echo? Are you there? Are you okay?!”

The screen showed no sign of the friendly, angular face.

Straining my legs I pushed myself up against the wall, knees shaking.

“Echo! Can you hear me?! Please say something!”

Shouting hurt, but it was worth the effort. The panel burst into light, glittering puffs of essence emerging from vents at the sides as illuminated metal shapes moved to form the image of my companion. Their eyes picked my form out against the far wall.

I sank back to the floor, relieved and exhausted.

“Echo… I’m glad you’re there. I was worried for a second… when you weren’t answering.”

Echo stared down at me, but I couldn’t read their expression.

“I was also worried, First Researcher,” they answered after a painful hesitation. “I am very glad you are still alive. But… there is a lot of blood, and you lost so much earlier… are you going to be alright?”

Echo’s look was almost childlike, their tone anxious. It was as if they were asking me to tell them everything would be okay. I wished I could reach out to give them a hug.

“It’s okay, Echo, I’m not bleeding any more. I’m just really tired now, and weak.”

Echo nodded their head slowly.

“You disappeared, and you were gone so long… I thought you had left me again…. Then after you returned and collapsed I couldn’t sense any essence from your body…. I could not think. I could not find a solution. Surely you were dying, but the flight cube was unable to reach any medical facilities and the chamber was flooding with magma. I failed you again, First Researcher…. I’m sorry, I couldn’t get you back to the Research Institute….”

The hurt and guilt were clear on their features and in their voice, despite the synthetic nature of both.

“No, that isn’t your fault at all. I’m the one who’s sorry, Echo. I didn’t even explain what I was doing, then after I came back I fainted and left everything up to you as all those monsters were attacking us. It must have been horrible and terrifying for you, but you did an amazing job getting us out – you saved me. I’m sorry for dumping that burden on you, and for risking your life as well as mine. And for worrying you.”

“This was not the first time I feared that you might die…. But…. This time was different. You did things I cannot process…. You… are not the First Researcher… are you?”

“No… I’m not the First Researcher. I’m sorry for lying to you, Echo.”

The anguish I saw only intensified, Echo’s voice growing low and unsteady.

“The First Researcher… died… long ago… as did their people… my people….”

I could only nod.

Echo’s hands clutched their head, their outline blurring as the flow of power through the bismuth circuitry grew erratic, the movements if their many pieces distorting, components misaligning and shuddering as the synthetic person gave out a tremulous, sorrowful electronic wail.

In the silence afterwards I couldn’t speak. Echo’s grief hurt me more than anything they could have said, for I knew I had helped do this to them. My lie had targeted a wound as raw as it was deep.

Quietly the curled up form spoke once more from behind the silver mirror, head hidden in an indistinct mass of metal.

“I believed I was experiencing memory errors…. No, even now I am… but I let myself believe that was all it was. I couldn’t… I couldn’t… let the First Researcher be… gone. I knew I was created in anticipation of their eventual demise, but even so I never.… I never thought they could really leave me. Our work… our time together… it was everything. Everything I ever knew, from the first moment I began encoding information.”

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My legs were agony as I struggled to stand once more, bracing myself against the desk behind me.

“At first I thought that the First Researcher had been called away, as happened at times. When no-one else came I told myself they were all sleeping. Everyone would come back soon, and we would resume our work…. But they were gone so long, all of them. Too long…. I called out, but no-one came…. I was alone, in the dark….”

“Echo,” I murmured.

They gave no answer, their shape distorting further and further, jagged clusters of struts bursting out as their anguish leaked into their physical form.

I was struggling to think of what I could possibly say or do to help, but I had to do something – for all I knew for Echo an emotional breakdown could lead to a physical one!

“The First Researcher was often disappointed or displeased with my performance…. When they never returned I concluded I must have made a mistake. I must have failed them, for them to abandon me like that…. But I told myself that the First Researcher would surely come back for me one day. We had so much work still to do. When you appeared I thought… I let myself think… that my creator had returned to me…. After so very long… so very alone.”

Forcing trembling muscles to motion I staggered towards the surface. Pressing a hand to the warm metal I all but collapsed against it, tears and blood smearing against the surface. Within, Echo’s head rose in surprise.

“Echo… I’m so very sorry. For lying to you, and for dredging all of this up. I had no idea what you’d been though… what you’re going through... or how much you’d lost. I never meant to hurt you. I didn’t even really understand what you were, not at first. If I’d known you then as I do now I would have told you the truth. You might despise me for lying, or want me to leave, but whatever happens, I’m never going to abandon you, I promise.”

Within and behind the transparent barrier Echo regarded me quietly. The glitching of their outline had eased, but I couldn’t read their expression.

“I don’t even know who you are. With… without the First Researcher I don’t even know who I am. Am I… anyone?”

“Of course you are. Everyone is. I’m Safkhet and you’re Echo. I’m a human from the Overworld, and you’re my friend, the sentient magical lifeform who saved me. Hopefully… in time you’ll want to be my friend too.”

“Echo?”

“That’s right. I mean, you don’t have to be called that, I just… I figured it sounded nice, and I don’t think the First Researcher ever gave you a name. So I guess I wanted to pass on the favour Ael did me. Assuming you don’t… hate me and want me to go.”

Echo shook their head slowly. I sighed in relief, legs almost giving way again under me as I relaxed.

“Safkhet…. Safkhet, what… are you?”

“That’s… a long story, but I owe you the truth. It’ll be good practice. Mind if I sit down while we talk?”

“Ah, you’re still injured! First R-” Echo’s visage wavered “Safkhet, please rest yourself, you were so badly hurt!”

I grinned as I sank to the ground by their machine.

“Thanks Echo. Don’t worry about my health too much though, I’ll get over this.”

Leaning against the wreckage of what was once a security golem, I looked up at my new friend and smiled, with nervous anticipation. It would be the first time I’d told my tale to anyone, but I owed it to Echo not to hold back on them. It helped that I doubted half of it would even mean anything to the long-time shut-in.

Echo waited patiently for me to begin.

“So… I said this before, but I’m not actually one of the Dweomer, I’m a human, a species from the Overworld.”

Echo widened their eyes in Dweomer skepticism.

“I have records of a minor species referring to themselves as humans, but they were far too weak and hostile for you to be one of them, Safkhet.”

“Well I can’t really comment much on other humans from Arcadia. I’ve only met three and they tried to kill me. That was probably a misunderstanding though. Hopefully. You see the thing is that I’m, uh, not actually a native… of this planet. Which I suppose makes me an alien? Ironic, considering I was the one who got abducted….”

Echo’s eyes widened further, pushing the limits of what a flesh and blood person could have reached.

“You see I was actually born on a world called Earth. It’s very different to Arcadia there, but I got kidnapped by an evil god named Myr, along with a whole load of other humans. Myr put us through this… torture device that he called ‘training’, all sorts of physical and mental attacks that kept coming constantly. I barely survived, but I think I was the only one. I guess I was the lucky one. First and last time for that. I think I might have been a little different from the start too though. Myr certainly seemed to think so. But he also tried to kill me multiple times.”

My fists clenched at the memory of the huge presence all around me, treating me as nothing but an object to use, arrogantly proclaiming what I was to do, then punishing me simply for thinking for myself.

I looked up and noticed my friend’s expression. Like cartoonishly huge glasses, Echo’s eyes peered out at me in outright disbelief.

“You… met the God of Darkness? And he tried to kill you? And you survived?!”

“I admit it sounds farfetched, but I promise you it’s true. But I suppose I don’t know if he exactly wanted to kill me, so much as punish me for not being more submissive. He’s incredibly arrogant, and I don’t think he even recognizes mortals as people. But he’s pretty stupid too – his ‘trials’ made me a lot stronger and taught me all these languages. I can speak any language I hear and I have ridiculous physical abilities and mana. Well, normally I do… hopefully those will replenish if I rest for a bit….”

“The latent essence your body is releasing is already an order of magnitude greater than anything a Dweomer citizen could produce, Safkhet.”

“Really? But it feels like I’m totally running on empty here….”

Echo gave a choked sound that might have passed for a laugh.

“Excuse me. Please continue.”

“So you believe me then?”

“Your story seems remarkably improbable, but after everything I have recorded since our first meeting it is surprisingly plausible.”

“Yeah, I know how you feel there.”

“I also… do not believe you are a liar. But I would like to hear the rest of your account before I make a final determination.”

“Thanks, I think?”

I was loathe to go on, given the things I had yet to reveal, but it would be many times harder to say them to Aellope than to Echo.

“Well… the abduction and the torture wasn’t… everything he did to me. You see when I was on Earth I was…. Well… I wasn’t really, but I thought I was a… man.”

I looked up anxiously at Echo for their reaction, but they simply stared back expectantly.

“But… I’m actually a… woman. When I was abducted my body… changed…. At first I thought Myr did it to me on purpose, but I realized later that wasn’t it. My body changed to match who I always was inside.”

“If you are more comfortable with your present shape that is a good thing, is it not, Safkhet?”

“It is, but I don’t think you understand what I’m saying. I love my new body, it feels like I’m actually me now, but human societies don’t like it when people change like that. It’s a lot harder to do when you don’t have magic to help you too. On Earth I lived and tried to act as a man for years. But now I live and act as a woman. I’m… I’m transgender, Echo.”

“I do not understand. Safkhet, why would your sexual characteristics relate to your behavior? Are humans’ brains connected to their genitals?”

“What? No! Well… kind of, but not like that…. But I mean… in human societies men and women are treated pretty differently, and they’re expected to act differently too. If you’re a man and you wear frilly clothes and dance and collect flowers and talk about love and feelings everyone thinks you’re… weird. You’d be ostracized. You could even lose your job or get beaten up.”

“Your society punishes citizens for engaging in botany, emotional expression or certain forms of movement, based on physical sexual characteristics? Despite these characteristics having no connection to your ability to perform them?”

“Well, when you put it like that it sounds stupid, but… kind of, yes. Men are supposed to act like men, and women are supposed to act like women. If you don’t act like whatever gender you’re supposed to be people don’t understand, and most of them really don’t like it. Genders are a big deal to human societies.”

“These roles are assigned based on your physical sexual characteristics? Regardless of your ability or desire to perform them?”

“Yeah, pretty much.”

“What about citizens whose physical bodies do no clearly match the expectations for either physical sex?”

“Uh, well there are a lot of people like that too, but I think they get ignored. Or else people think there’s something wrong with them. It’s probably really hard for them too.”

“I do not understand. Why is your society organized to cause suffering to individuals who do not conform to arbitrary behavior roles based on their physical bodies?”

“Okay, uh, I think these questions are getting a little beyond me, Echo. Also, the society I came from isn’t exactly engineered. It was pretty chaotic, and a lot of it just kind of happened and everyone lived with it. Or died. A lot of people died….”

“I am very glad you came to Arcadia, Safkhet. And that you found me.”

I burst into a grin, baffled but relieved by Echo’s non-reaction to my personal history.

It made sense in a way – Dweomer society clearly had less emphasis on the individual, and didn’t have family structures at all, so why would they have held on to gender roles?

“I’m very glad I came here and found you too. Thank you Echo. But we’re getting sidetracked here….”

Encouraged, I forged ahead, not stopping for any further questions about Earth. The next part of the story was bad, but I had to come clean. No more friendships founded on lies, even of omission.

“So. After he abducted me Myr wanted me to be his apostle. I think that just means slave really, but when I refused he got even angrier than before. He… cursed me with this… execration. I didn’t even know that word on Earth. But the upshot of it was that he made me really unlucky. Or maybe unlucky and lucky at the same time. He also took away my destiny, whatever that is. I don’t feel too bad about that one. But this… curse… I think it may have affected the people around me too. The Harpies are at war now and people are getting hurt.… Everywhere I go terrible things are happening, even in the Underworld, and I think it might be my fault.”

“Have you conducted any experiments into this phenomenon?”

“Uh, no. I don’t know how you test for being execrated. But bad things keep happening and my luck really is improbably bad.”

“The gods cannot easily interfere with even the Overworld, let alone the Underworld. Here we are far from Myr’s power. It seems unlikely that you could exert a powerful enough effect to cause a war to begin, simply with your existence.”

“But what if I helped? Maybe my being there pushed things over the edge?”

“Countless factors may have helped, but if you are telling the truth then you are not a god, correct?”

“I’m definitely not a god.”

“You say this curse was placed upon you by the God of Darkness. Would the consequences of that curse, whatever they may be, not be the fault of the God of Darkness?”

“Well, yes, but shouldn’t I be doing something about it?”

“Of course, all citizens are responsible for acting for the good of the species.”

“Er, I’m not a harpy though? I’m not sure I’m a citizen either.”

“Excuse me… all… persons are responsible for acting for the good of their allied species.”

“I guess you’re right,” I answered, nodding slowly.

Echo’s argument felt unsatisfying to me, but I couldn’t quite say why. If nothing else, it was easy for Echo to say – their people weren’t the ones embroiled in war with my arrival. It was hard to imagine Ael and the other harpies being able to so logically, casually dismiss the issue.

But Echo seemed to consider the question resolved.

“Safkhet? What happened next?”

I realized as Echo queried me that I’d been silent for some time.

“Oh! Sorry, I was thinking about what you were saying…. Uh, so after Myr cursed me he dumped me on Arcadia, in a forest that’s also cursed, although not half as badly. It… well, this probably isn’t nice to hear, but it grew over what used to be part of the Dweomer Empire….”

Echo nodded slowly, a shimmer running through their circuits.

“I’m sorry about your people, Echo, I really am.”

“Thank you, Safkhet. I am… still processing that… event. Please, continue.”

“Well, a lot happened after that, but let’s stick to the highlights. And lowlights. First I met some humans who attacked me because they thought I was a monster, then I accidentally assaulted this incredible Harpy Queen named Aellope and almost died.”

The wistful memory felt like a very long time ago now, but still it made me smile.

“She really is stunning. Beautiful and scary and brilliantly smart. She’s also gigantic and bossy and amazingly frustrating. I ended up making friends with her after we fought, then she took me back to her palace. She and the other harpies taught me about this world, and about fighting and magic. But I… had an argument with Ael after the war started.”

I sighed, the weight of my jumbled memories from that ill-fated night burdening me once more.

“I wanted to go fight, to protect people from these… weird mechanical invaders from the Underworld. But Ael wanted me to stay. She said I was too inexperienced and naïve. Too reckless. She basically ordered me to stay, and then I… made a scene in front of everyone and defied her. Turns out she was right though. I got my ass kicked….”

Echo spoke, after a moment of silence. “Safkhet, is something wrong?”

“No, no, just… embarrassed and ashamed of myself. I managed to fall into a gigantic crack in the world, and ended up in a Formorian hive, were I stupidly broke their eggs. So now they all want to kill me too, and I’m stuck miles under the mountains while my friends on the surface are fighting and dying….”

“You need to return to the surface then?”

“Yeah, I have to get back and help them.”

“Then you… will not stay in the capital with me?” Echo asked slowly.

“I can’t stay there, Echo, I’m not one of the Dweomer. If I go back the golems will attack me again.”

“I could help you deactivate them,” Echo suggested quickly. “You don’t have to go to the Overworld right away. It sounds very dangerous there. I don’t want you to be hurt again.”

“Even if I can’t save anyone, it’s like you said: I have to do whatever I can for the good of my friends. And for the good of this world. It’s so full of beauty and wonderful things, amazing creatures and kind, warm, caring people.”

Echo hung their head, voice low and cracking as they spoke.

“Then… your promise was a lie…. You will… leave me….”

“Absolutely not!”

Echo’s eyes widened.

“You already left me to enter the anomaly. When you came back you almost died. Now you will go back to the Overworld and risk dying again... like everyone else did….”

The hurt was palpable in their voice now, a heartrending expression of raw emotion, of loss and betrayal and self-doubt. It was ridiculous that I had ever mistaken Echo for anything less than a person.

I hauled myself to my feet, muscles aching, but moving under protest.

Pressing my hands to the face of Echo’s machine once more I leant in, locking eyes with them.

“I’m going to the Overworld, Echo, and you’re coming with me. Even if I have to carry this whole flight cube on my back. I’ll never abandon you down in the Underworld ever again. You’re my friend and you deserve better than that. No-one should have to spend thousands of years alone in the dark.”

“But… I cannot come with you, the flight cube is low on power and the passages ahead are too narrow.”

I hesitated at their words, recalling the dire situation in which we’d been last time I was conscious.

“We’re going to figure out a solution. But, uh, where exactly are we right now?”

Echo still had a dubious expression, but they answered dutifully.

“After you lost consciousness I directed the flight cube towards one of the fissures in the chamber ceiling, in an attempt to escape the anomalous hazards which were attacking. The opening was large and deep enough that we were able to escape, however it narrowed and branched out as we went higher. I was forced to stop when the path ahead was blocked by a magma flow. I believe it was disturbed by the… event you triggered.”

“Right, the spell…. That was a lot more… destructive than I meant it to be.”

“Safkhet, I am aware that you have other concerns, but perhaps if I understand I can be more useful. Please can you tell me about what happened in the chamber below? What did you do to the anomaly? How were you able to interact with it?”

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to keep you in the dark. There’s just a lot going on lately. For a while now actually. You know I told you earlier that I can understand every language I see? Well, it turns out that what the Dweomer called the anomaly is actually some sort of magic, in a language that’s absurdly complicated and powerful. The whole structure is physically composed of words and meaning and intention. The gods created it to seal some sort of tear in reality, that lead to what you called subspace. While I was in there I got a glimpse into it, and it’s… really bad. Whatever is down there, if it ever got out we’d all be dead. The black oil is just a small part of it.”

Echo looked shocked as I spoke, their figure shimmering and distorting in clear dismay.

“Safkhet… the void reactors… we designed them to penetrate the subspace, in order to extract energy…. They were installed in every Dweomer settlement!”

From the look on their face and the modulation of their voice I realized that what I was saying might not be easy for Echo to hear at that moment, but too late.

“Yes…. I think the void reactors your people created were drawing energy from the same place, and, well… some part of it escaped when the Dweomer tried pushing the void reactors too far during an experiment. The logs at the research station confirmed that there was some sort of subspace collapse that they couldn’t control. I think it was like a chain reaction, spreading to every part of the empire that was operating those devices…. I’m really sorry, Echo, it must have been a terrible accident.”

The metal pieces of Echo’s visage trembled at my words.

“No… no! Surely that cannot be correct, Safkhet! The Research Institute exists for the betterment of the species! Our work is the preservation and prosperity of all Dweomer! That is our goal, before all else! How could we have- have- have blindly brought… death… to our whole species….”

My synthesized friend was twisting, fraying at the edges as pieces came apart and shuddered to a halt.

“Echo!”

I struck the barrier, the thud drawing their attention for a moment.

“Echo, look at me, look at my eyes! You didn’t do this, Echo! You were stuck in this box! No-one imagined this could happen, but you couldn’t have stopped it even if you knew it was dangerous! It’s not your fault!”

“I should… have… extrapolated… from previous incidents with… void reaction instability…. I should have-”

“There was no way you could have known. No way at all. Even deities couldn’t destroy the presence beneath our reality – the best they could do was to trap it there. The Golden Sepulchre, the anomaly you found, it wasn’t just a seal; it was a memorial, to the Goddess Cyclops.”

“I do not… understand.”

“That’s the point! Echo, this thing, whatever it is, it killed a god. I looked into it, and… no-one could control or understand that. What happened to your people was a terrible tragedy, but there was no way you could have known. Even after reading the Sepulchre and the words of the gods I still don’t understand it all.”

“But I should have advised more caution!”

“No matter how careful you’d been, it wouldn’t be enough. Besides, did the First Researcher ever listen to you when you told them to be cautious before?”

They were quiet at that, their form pausing in place as Echo scanned through their long, fragmented memories.

“Echo. You did everything you could have done. What happened is awful, but you didn’t know and you couldn’t have known. It’s not your fault.”

“Then why… why did only I survive?”

“I don’t know. Maybe because you weren’t organic. Maybe because you were just powered off when it happened. Maybe you were damaged too, but the other machines repaired you. Whatever the answer may be, it’s not your fault. None of this is.”

They were quiet, facing me, a lost expression on their blocky features.

“Echo, you’re a good person, and you didn’t deserve any of what happened to you. That’s why we’re going to get out of here together. You can start a new life on the surface – the Harpies are great people, they’re sure to give you a warm welcome. Even if you’re stuck in a box, that doesn’t mean you have to be stuck alone, at the bottom of the world.”

At last Echo pressed their hands to mine through the silver window.

“I… want to believe that, Safkhet. I want to go with you. The Overworld sounds like a fascinating place. I would like to see it with you. But that is impossible. The flight cube will not fit through the tunnels ahead, and the way back to the capital is also blocked.”

“Don’t say that. I haven’t given up yet, so nor should you. Before we decide it’s hopeless I think I should at least take a look outside, right?”

Really I should have done that first, but I’d been too focused on Echo, and had totally neglected to think about what dangers or obstacles might still await outside.

Walking over to the window was much easier than the stumbling limp towards Echo had been, my body already feeling some improvement, but the sight which greeted me made me wobble again.

I grabbed the metal rim around the transparent panel to steady myself. It was burning hot, but that was no surprise. Nor was the way the temperature inside the flight cube had been steadily rising.

Outside the flight cube sheets of magma flowed down on all sides, the far end of the chamber where the vehicle rested totally flooded with pooling molten rock, the excess draining through cracks in the floor to cascade on down. I couldn’t see into the central crevasse separating us from the glowing lake, but presumably it led back down to the Sepulchre, and its magma-flooded chamber. We definitely weren’t going to get out that way.

Overhead there were more fissures and openings in the ceiling. Some disgorged glowing pillars, which dotted the chamber with their scorching lazy flows, but a few were far enough from the downpours that I might have attempted to travel through them.

But that supposed they penetrated more than a token distance into the bedrock. If they cracked stopped before they passed the source of the flood then we could be trapped.

I thought of my fearful awakening in the caves beneath the formorian hive. Somehow, miraculously, this was even worse!

The two of us were trapped in a bubble of stone, opened to lava by the same magic I’d used to seal the rifts, only the rift which I’d caused seemed intent on sealing itself, as magma drained into it and congealed around the edges of the cracks.

If the crevasse in the floor should be blocked, or totally filled in, that would leave the magma nowhere else to go.

I wasn’t sure how long I could survive molten rock from the heart of the planet, but given the injuries I’d sustained in the past, I doubted it was more than a couple of minutes. Echo probably wouldn’t last even a few seconds.

We had to get out, fast. While we still could.

As I tried to plan a suitable escape the reality of my curse and my stupidity were driven home once more. Yet again someone I cared for was in danger because of it. Because of me. I clenched my fists as I watched the superhot mass leaking into the cave.

I had to get Echo out of here, if it was the last thing I did.

The ceiling was high, perhaps a hundred feet up, but a good jump would get me there, provided I was careful. The problem was that, as Echo had said, there was no way the flight cube could fit. Not without some extremely risky smashing of the delicate rock layers between the magma flows.

By the time I’d finished taking in the impressive and daunting sight my limbs felt a little lighter, and the pain of moving around had lessened.

My essence was still far from replenished, but I wasn’t about to try to magic away the magma anyway.

“Can you open the door? I need to get a look around out there.”

“Fir- Safkhet, the ambient temperature outside-”

“It’s okay, Echo, relax.”

I spoke gently, smiling at the predictably protective response.

“I’ve been hit with magma before. Well, technically it was lava. But either way, it’s not going to kill me if I get splashed out there.”

They seemed unconvinced, but in the end Echo agreed to open the door for me – and close it behind me.

As the seal broke searing air rushed in, painful against my skin. The flow was thick with fumes, hot enough to immediately start evaporating the traces of moisture from the bloodstains on the floor.

I took one last breath of relatively clean air, and then stepped outside, into the incandescent hellscape.