"This all seems reasonable, except for the last one." The duke's voice carried me back to the present. I sat up straight and tried to look like my mind hadn't been wandering. He had been looking at my list of requests. Paug had offered to write it for me, but I had spent the last few days learning enough to do it myself, with his help of course.

I did not fool Nadea; she eyed me suspiciously from the seat next to her father in his private audience chamber. She did remind me of Shlara. They had similar hair, both in color, length, and the preferred method of wearing it in a ponytail. They were both strong-willed and determined to get what they wanted. Both were beautiful. I wondered what had happened between Shlara and me. Was she the woman mentioned in Malek's message? I hoped I would remember more soon.

"Why do you want this?" Nadea asked, looking at the piece of paper. It was the three of us, plus Paug and the handsome blonde man Runir. He glared at me coldly as he leaned against the wall. At first I didn't understand why he didn't like me. Then realized that he followed Nadea around like an over protective shadow, and his looks seemed to grow colder when she was around me.

"Which one?" I tried to play dumb. Paug squinted at me from his seat. I suspected he knew I had just remembered something.

"Free rein around the castle and ten miles in either direction, access to the soldiers’ training grounds, weapon stores, horses, and no guards at your door," she explained my request to me. She frowned slightly as she looked at her father for guidance.

"I need space and equipment to train. I'm not going to spend all winter here without doing anything productive." Paug had told me that the winters in Nia were mild. The coldest it would get would still not freeze water in the lake nearby.

"You've already asked for a long sword, heavy war mace, twin bladed axe, eight-foot spear, a variety of different shields, helmets, tailors, and leather workers. We can give you all of that. Some of it we will have to custom craft for you, but we have skilled tradesmen here," the duke finished, the implication clear that they were already doing so much to meet my needs that the additional requests were pushing the boundaries of their hospitality.

"That is good. Thank you. I still need freedom to move through the castle."

"It is too dangerous. Spies will find out about you and someone will try to assassinate you. We can't risk losing you," Nadea said. While I knew I was not invincible, it frustrated me that they all still seemed to think that I needed their protection, or that they could protect me. I suspected any creature or group capable of killing me would also be able to easily overcome any of Nia’s guards.

"Am I your prisoner here, Duke?" I asked the older man.

"No Kaiyer, of course you aren't." He shook his head.

"And you want me to help you against these Ancients, correct?" I looked around for something to eat. I had eaten a few hours ago but I always felt hungry now.

"Yes, we want you to help," he said cautiously, quite aware I was leading him somewhere he did not wish to go.

"Then I need to be able to train and explore. I cannot be stuck inside this castle for four months."

"We cannot risk you being discovered," Nadea said.

"This is wasting all of our time. You don't have a guard here that could stop me, nor one who could protect me better than I’ve already proven I can protect myself. I could jump from the window of this room and you would never see me again." Nadea paled a bit. "I am staying here because it is what you desire." I met her eyes and she began to blush again. I was learning the nuances of their language well enough that the word desire was a deliberate choice. Runir shuffled his feet against the wall, uneasy.

"What do you foresee your days and nights looking like, if we give you free rein and you train?" the duke asked.

"I remember performing lifting activities, using either my own body weight or other heavy objects. Afterward, I remember running for ten or so miles. All of this before breakfast. Then I would do combat training most of the day. Repeating the same physical lifting, and adding fun elements to it like climbing trees, before dinner." I remembered most of my physical training but the combat training was still fuzzy. I knew I had learned a small amount of it when I was being trained by my Elven masters, but had refined it later in the O'Baarni's army.

"It will be too brazen," Nadea confirmed as her father looked at her. "We are trying to keep your presence here discrete for everyone's protection. We can't let you do it." Her eyes softened a bit as she looked at me. She didn't want to refuse me.

"There has to be another option! We can't expect Kaiyer to be locked in his room for the next few months. He is going stir crazy already," Paug came to my defense.

"He'll put us all in danger!" Runir said from his corner. I leaned forward to indicate that I wished to speak.

"I want to make sure that we confirm, I am not your prisoner?" The duke nodded. "I understand both of you played a large part in finding me and awakening me from my slumber.  I want to thank you for that. I owed you a debt. Perhaps you believe I still do." Nadea opened her mouth to speak but I continued, "I do not owe you anything at this point. I have saved your daughter's life and the life of Jessmei. Whatever I may have owed you for waking me is repaid with these actions."

"I agree. You aren't our prisoner here, Kaiyer, we want to work together with you against our common foe." The duke smiled. His face looked years younger when he did.

"Then you must find a solution. I need to be pushing forward toward an obtainable goal. Waiting around for something to happen, like my memory coming back, isn't a strategy I am comfortable with. I have needs: food and water, and a place to train unobstructed." My eyes met Nadea's. "If you can't get me these things I do not see any reason to stay here. I will push to the North, killing and obtaining what I need when I get there."

"What you are asking is impossible!" Nadea was pleading. "The king doesn't want our enemy to know that you exist. The rumors we are spreading are helping. There are more stories about the night of the banquet than there were people there. We still need you to be discrete until you can remember and help us."

"I cannot help you if I cannot train as I wish." I got out of my chair. Her face hardened and she reminded me even more of Shlara. "Figure it out. You have a week before I go. You know where to find me." The duke and Nadea protested, but I turned and walked out of the room. I saw Paug's shocked face before I exited. There were four guards waiting in the hallway outside the door. They were always around me and now I wondered if the king thought their presence was for my protection, or so extra eyes could watch me. I nodded at them and we began to walk down the hall toward my dormitory. Within a minute Nadea's footsteps echoed off the stone hall behind us.

"Kaiyer, hold on!" she shouted. The guards and I turned to watch her approach us. Runir was a dozen or so feet behind her. I didn't see Paug.

"Can we talk?" she said when she reached us. I nodded.

"Leave us," she commanded the guards. They didn't look happy but they saluted and left, walking down the hall toward my room.

"If you want to speak privately you should also ask your puppy to leave," I said as I nodded behind her to the figure of Runir, leaning against the wall.

"I'll be okay. Thanks for walking with me," she said to the handsome blonde man. He glowered at me and then walked past us.

"I was leaving anyway," he said.

Nadea waited for him to walk away. His footsteps echoed briefly in the empty stone hallways of the massive castle. A servant ran down the hall, her head down to avoid eye contact.

"You were beautiful at the banquet last week," I said with a smile. "You are always beautiful, but that purple dress looked wonderful on you." She put her right hand up to stroke the hair in her ponytail. "I said that color, purple, correct? It was purple?" She nodded, her mouth twisted awkwardly as she attempted to stifle a smile. "I'm sad I didn't get to spend any time with you that night. You were sitting far from me."

"That's where the king preferred me." Her lips remained parted as if she wished to continue, but I interrupted.

"Have you been avoiding me?"

"No! It's just that we are trying to figure out what to do with you," she said with a sigh. We paused as another servant passed.

"The king, duke, and you? Or just you?" I said with an eyebrow raised.

"What do you mean?"

"Have you figured out what you are going to do with me?" I said plainly.

"No!" she gaped at me. "I've been too busy to think about it." She paused when another servant walked past.

"Is there somewhere private we can talk?" I was becoming annoyed with all the people walking by.

"Eh . . . there will be people at your room. We can go to mine," she said as she motioned her head toward the wing of the castle we shared.

"Good. There is a bed in your room, right?"

"Yes. Wait, no. Let's go to the library instead." She turned around and smiled calmly at me, but her face was red.

"Okay. We can use the table there."

"You don't give up do you?" she said with the smile still on her face. It seems that she wasn't angry at me anymore.

"Not when there is something I want. You are the same way." She nodded but didn't meet my eyes and her heart began to beat faster. She was wearing a loose pair of gray pants that hugged her hips and flared out more as the material ran down her long legs. Her blouse was sky blue and ran high up her chest, with a lace button down opening at the front. Her feet were encased in soft black leather boots that looked like they would be destroyed if worn outside for more than five minutes.

We passed a few more servants and guards on the way there. Most of them looked at me in awe. Word had spread through the castle that I had done something during the banquet, so even people that had not been at the celebration were uneasy around me. Nadea opened the door to her library and motioned for me to enter. From what Paug had told me, it was the only one on the wing. So while it wasn't hers exactly, she used it the most.

It was an expansive room, with several thick tables laid out in the corners and the middle. Two large windows provided light from the outside courtyard. It was after breakfast time, so the light came through warm and golden, like a child had poured honey over the shelves. There were hundreds of books and scroll cases hanging on the walls and it smelled strongly of dust, paper, and candle wax.

She looked around for a second in the hall before she closed the door behind her. She was nervous. I could hear her heart thump in her chest. I hadn't moved from when I first walked into the room and she gave a startled gasp when she turned around and was face to face with me.

My left hand reached up and touched the outside of her bare arm. Her skin was soft, and cooler than I expected. I slowly ran the tips of my fingers up toward her shoulders. She didn't stop me, so I took a half-step closer to her and reached my right hand to clasp around her hip and lower back. Her body was firm beneath the smooth fabric of her pants and blouse.  My mouth began to water as I thought about running my hands over the rest of her body. My fingertips brushed against the hilt of a small dagger that she had secreted flat against the gentle curve of her back.

Her eyes were open wide and her mouth was slightly parted. She quickly glanced between my eyes and my lips as I leaned in toward her. Her eyes closed as my face got close and a soft moan escaped her mouth. I was a few inches from kissing her when I heard footsteps approach from down the hall, it sounded like four or five guards.

She opened her eyes when I hadn’t kissed her and looked at me in confusion. I saw the conflicting emotions battling in her eyes. Then there was a knock on the door.

I released her body from my grip and opened the door. Runir was out there with four guards. He was not happy to see me.

"Is Nadea in here?" he seethed out.

"Yes," I opened the door a little wider so he could see her. Her face revealed nothing but worry.

"Something wrong, Runir?" she asked.

"The king wishes to see you," he said as he looked at her and then back to me. "I'm to take him back to his room."

"Okay. I'll go to him. We'll talk later, Kaiyer. We need to discuss your plans." She smiled at me and walked through the door. The guards went with her, leaving the handsome blonde man and me alone.

"I'll take you back to your room," he said. It was a command. I smiled at him and shrugged. I didn't need to start anything with him now. He was just following orders. Although I wondered how he had found us.

"I know that you think you are some sort of savior," he began as we walked down the long hallway toward my room. "But I want to make things clear about Nadea." I stopped walking and turned to face him in the hallway. He looked into my eyes, his face a mask of contempt.

"This should be interesting. Go ahead," I said with a smile. My attitude seemed to push him over the edge.

"I don't want you near her. Do not touch her, don't talk to her, don't even look at her. Or you'll answer to me. Understand?” He pushed his pointer finger up against my chest and his face down toward me. He was a few inches taller than me and probably outweighed me by eighty pounds.

I had tried to stay calm since I understood the desire he had for my beautiful friend. Yet I couldn't keep the anger from the pit of my stomach when he pushed his finger into my chest. I had experienced enough of his attitude. It was time to show him fear. He needed to be put in his place. Actually, they all needed to be put in their place.

My left hand came across and slapped his arm aside. My right hand formed the shape of a C and slid into his neck, pushing him against the far wall of the hallway. His feet dangled off the ground as I pushed his body upward against the smooth stone walls. The pulse of his throat drummed between my fingertips and his neck creaked as his spine struggled to support the weight of his frame. His face turned from rage into panic as is hands grasped my wrist. He tried to force my grip free but it was like a baby trying to wrestle a carcass out of a wolf's mouth.

"I am going to forget what you have said to me. But you are never going to forget the feeling of my hands choking the life from you. Understand?" I said calmly. My smile was all teeth.

He gurgled out something that I took as an agreement, but I pinched my grip together a little more. I could feel the arteries that ran from the brain to the heart beneath my fingers. He tried to struggle a bit more but within five seconds his body had gone limp. I released my hold and his unconscious form fell to the ground like a sack of flour. He would have a horrible headache when he awoke.

I turned and saw a servant staring at me from farther down the hallway. I recognized her as the pretty girl that always brought me food and flirted with me. Her face was in shock.

"He'll be okay," I said to her with a smile. "What are you going to bring me for lunch?" She stared at me, shook her head, and then returned my smile hesitantly.

"We have some beef that I was going to have them make into sandwiches for you. Does that sound okay?" I nodded.

"Thank you. A few hours from now okay? I'm going to go take a nap."

I walked past the girl and heard her run away. I sighed with regret. I shouldn't have done that. There would be more rumors in the castle about me now.

Fuck the rumors.

I didn't need to be here. I wanted to kill Elvens. Everything else I did for these people was a favor to them. I don't know exactly what I had done in the O'Baarni's army, but my last memory had made it very clear that I was one of his best generals, and I commanded a large part of his forces. I didn't need to be treated with any disrespect by the people of Nia. I had other shit to do.

There were two guards in front of my door. They nodded to me as I approached.

"I am going to go inside my room now. When my lunch arrives I do not wish to see any guards at my door. Do you understand?"

"We have orders," the one to the right said. He frowned apologetically. He didn't want to make me angry.

"Leave now. Tell your king that I will kill any guards stationed outside my door." They both paled.

I guessed the servant girl in the hallway had cleaned my room since it smelled like lemons and all the bedding was folded neatly. I lay down on my bed, intending to sleep, but my mind was spinning over the events of this morning and my memories of Shlara. I gave up on rest and went over to the balcony to watch the troops train. Most of the soldiers from the other countries had left earlier in the week. I wondered what the king had told them about how I had killed the Elvens. I focused on listening to the mock fighting down in the fields. There were eight groups of twenty or so, running different drills. Their sergeants yelled when someone made a mistake or wasn't working hard enough. I watched them for what seemed like half an hour, until there was a soft knock on my door.

I sighed and approached the door. This was going to be someone complaining about Runir or my treatment of the guards stationed outside of my room. I opened it to find a woman, a little older than Nadea, with fine blonde hair and deep blue eyes. Thankfully, the guards were gone.

"My lady wishes to know if you will have lunch with her," the woman said as she examined my body. She wore a delicate looking dress made out of white and blue lace with pale blue slippers on her feet.

"Your lady?"  I asked with an eyebrow raised.

"Princess Jessmei. She wishes to have lunch with you in the Royal Garden." She waited patiently for my answer.

"Yes I will come," I replied. I had not spoken with Jessmei since our trip here had ended a few weeks ago. It would be good to see her again.

"Perfect. My lady will be pleased. Do you know where the Royal Gardens are?"

"No." I frowned as I considered the logistical nightmare of getting over to the other side of the castle after I had just told the duke he had a week to meet my demands, choked Runir unconscious, and threatened to kill the guards at my door.

"I will come to escort you in one quarter of an hour. That will give you time to prepare better attire." The woman nodded and smiled at me. Before I replied she turned and walked away.

I hadn't thought my clothes were in such poor shape, but then I realized I wore a pair of pants and a shirt I had taken from the Vanlourns. I went to my wardrobe and put on one of the outfits that the king's tailor had created for me: a light red and brown tunic and pants with gold stitching on all the seams.

Minutes later, I heard Jessmei's handmaiden walk toward my room and I opened the door to greet her.

"You look very handsome," she complimented me as she appraised my attire.

"Thank you," I said as she led me down the hallway. Her arm wrapped around mine, similar to the way Nadea's had the other day.

"How have you enjoyed your stay in Nia so far?" She looked over to me and shook her hair back, it fell like a waterfall of mercury.

"It has been fine." I chose my words carefully. "I am anxious to be useful."

"I'm sure you will be." She nodded to a few servants that passed us.

"Oh, I just remembered, I had asked the girl that takes care of my room to bring me lunch," I said, nearly forgetting the pretty servant in the hallway that had witnessed me choking Runir.

"Wait," the woman called out to the servants that we had just passed. She eloquently explained to them I would not require lunch and they told us they would make sure it wasn't delivered. After the conversation the blonde woman took my arm again and we continued on our way.

She took me out of the wing of the castle in which I had spent most of my visit toward the north side. We passed maybe a dozen guards as we walked and they eyed me in surprise. While most of the castle was impressive, I could immediately tell the difference between the North Wing of the castle and the rest of the structure. The Royal Wing was decorated with even richer furniture, better art, even the guards seemed more capable. The ceilings were higher and there were rich dark wooden beams running through them.

"Does the king know that Jessmei and I are having lunch?" I asked.

"Yes," the woman said. "We are almost there." We went down a flight of stairs and into an open garden area.

Large willowy trees decorated the perimeter of the garden, while excellently manicured maples, spruces, and pines led along a stone path into its center. Each side of the small field was flanked by bright yellow green moss and a sunset cascade of colored flowers arranged in a warm rainbow that flowed from papery magenta bougainvillea on one end, followed by deep velvety red camellias, orange chrysanthemums, downy yellow dahlias and dandelions, to a row of buttery gardenias that scented the air with a heady perfume. The colors of the blooms blended artfully and created a gorgeous wash of color that contrasted beautifully with the vibrant greens of the trees and lawn. I imagined the hours of human labor it took to maintain such an unnaturally pristine and purely decorative landscape and wondered how this kingdom functioned without slave labor.

I heard the soft laughter of a brook up ahead of me. It mixed with the giggles of women's voices and the chirping of happy yellow birds that danced between the branches of the trees. The woman led me along the path for a few minutes. It led up a small hill before sloping down into a shallow and cool glade framed by feathery willows. The sound of the laughter grew louder as we reached a clearing hidden in the depths of the trees.

"Kaiyer!" Jessmei's voice shouted with delight when I entered the clearing. The woman who was escorting me released me in time for me to cradle the princess's body in my arms as she flung herself on me in exuberance.  "Thank you so much for coming!" She pulled her face away from my shoulder and our eyes made contact briefly. For a second I thought she was going to kiss me, but then she released her grip from around my neck and landed easily on the ground.

She was wearing a thin yellow summer dress that was embroidered with blue and vermillion flowers around the edges of the hem and sleeves. Her hair was done up in a curly tower of golden locks, entwined with white and golden daisies. She wore color on her cheeks and her lips were stained a darker red than I would have expected her to wear. It made her seem more of a woman and less of a girl.

"I can't turn down food," I said with a laugh. "Especially with my favorite princess."

"Ha! I'm the only princess you know! You do need to eat more. I believe you've only gained a few pounds since we first met you. Don't worry, I have a great lunch for us all planned out. Oh, let me introduce you to my handmaidens," she said with pleasure as she wrapped her arm around mine and pulled me farther into the clearing.

"You have already met Cerra," she indicated the pretty woman who had walked me from my room. She had joined her companions in a small circle where they were working on a complicated knitting project. Cerra gave me a dazzling smile before looking back down to her work.

"That is Yera, Levie, Damina, and Siliah." She pointed to the other women of the circle. All as pretty as Cerra and ranging in age from Jessmei to a few years older than Nadea. “There is a table over here for us, please join me." She indicated a small table with two chairs placed about fifty feet from where her maidens were knitting. I followed her lead toward the table. I remembered seeing men pull chairs out for women at the banquet, so I did the same for her before I took my seat.

As soon as we sat down two servants appeared out of the shadows and put glasses on the table and then poured water into them. One waiter put a small basket of steaming bread in the center of the table, and the other placed a platter of cheese, red berries, and butter alongside it. They moved back a few steps and Jessmei nodded at them before they removed themselves.

"Where is Greykin?" I asked, looking around for the big man. I couldn't imagine him being more than twenty feet from the princess, especially if I was near her.

"He took a week off to visit family. A sister I believe. It is a few days’ ride. Let me prepare some bread for you," she said as she grabbed a thinly cut slice and put a spread of butter on it, then she placed it on a plate and handed it to me.

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"Thank you," I said before I took a bite. It was delicious. "I don't see any guards. Aren't you always under some sort of protection?" I said as I eyed the trees. I didn't hear anything except for the servants, her handmaidens, the stream that flowed nearby, the breeze through the branches of the trees, and the birds.

"Oh they are around the garden. Do you think my father would let me dine with you alone and unprotected?" she giggled and stuck her tongue out at me. Her voice was as pleasant as the sound of the brook. "I am so glad you came. We haven't had a chance to talk in a few weeks and I wanted to catch up with you. How do you enjoy my home?" She looked at me eagerly. The rays of the sun danced through the trees and made her eyes sparkle like sapphires.

I sat back in my chair and debated on what to tell her. Then I figured the truth was the best. Perhaps Jessmei could convince her father that I needed to have a little more freedom here.

"It has been a nice stay, but I am going to be leaving within the week." Her face cracked like she had just lost a favorite pet.

"What? Why?" Her eyes opened up as her lips pouted. They were full and moist, like the berries on the table. For a second I wanted to lean across and taste them.

"Your father, Nadea, and her father are having disagreements with me," I said as I reached across to sample some of the berries. They were good, but probably not as delicious as her lips were. I tried to steer my thoughts from ravishing her to the conversation. It was difficult.

"About what?" She took my plate and began to slice cheese for it, concern plain on her face as she concentrated on our conversation.

"I would prefer to leave as soon as possible for the North, where the Ancients’ army is. They argued that I should stay here since the winters are terrible up north and there will be no activity for the next few months. I agreed as long as they could meet my requests. So far we have been at an impasse about my dormitory. They seem to think that it will be safer if I am locked in my room for the winter. This is unacceptable." She nodded at me and handed me a new plate of bread and cheese.

"Can I help?" she asked me. "I don't want you to leave."

"If you can convince your father to let me have free rein over the castle it would be excellent. I need to move around, train, become stronger, and run. Spending the next three months locked in my room will not be pleasant for me."

“I know.”

"Is that why you left the castle and followed Nadea?"

"Yes," she answered plainly. "You have been here for a few weeks and you already want to leave. I've been here for almost nineteen winters. I don't leave my room unless the guards are with me, when I am in my room my handmaidens are always around.” Her face fell a little, she maintained the smile in her lips but her eyes narrowed in anger. “Those first days on my own, having freedom to do what I wished, not to have to explain myself or ask permission, it was the first time I felt . . . real?” She looked up at me, unsure. I nodded to encourage her to continue. While I could not relate to the sheltered, privileged life she led, I did understand how it felt to go from being watched over and ordered around to having to think for yourself. It was at once jarring, terrifying, and exhilarating. “Here I am just another treasured object,” she gestured to the elegant marble statues flanking our table, “my purpose is to look nice, grow in value and eventually be used to purchase political power.” Her face was suddenly hard, serious.

I found it hard to pity her though. I remembered a world where I was nothing more than a beast of burden. I remembered my father and brother, their handsome faces contorted into ones of pain and death. She lacked freedom, but she was safe, she was valued and irreplaceable. This girl had no idea how easy her life was compared to what the women of my time had endured. She had never known fear or hunger. I doubted she had ever experienced any real pain.

"Were you punished for following Nadea?" I asked so my mind could wander from the raw memories.

"Yes, but not that badly. Father and Mother canceled a few of my activities. I had also planned a trip to Nadea's home for a few weeks and they told me I couldn't go. Mother probably believes my cousin is a bad influence on me." She laughed but I could sense frustration in the expression.

"Nadea's home? Doesn't she live here?" My mind thought back to an hour ago when I had almost kissed her. I forced myself to focus.

"No. The duke's keep is a hundred or so miles east, closer to the mountains. He guards the Teeth Mountain ranges from the Losher Tribes." I gave her a puzzled look. "They are another country. Losher dislikes us even more than Vanlourn. Nadea and her father are here for you, although she has been using the castle for her studies for the last few years. She normally goes home during the winter. I was going to go with her."

I nodded and thought to myself. Perhaps I could use Nadea's keep instead of staying here. It sounded like it might be out of the way. Jessmei took a sip of her water and looked over at the birds. She appeared lost in her own thoughts.

"Jessmei has such a crush on the stranger," one of her handmaidens, I believe Levie, whispered to the others. They had been softly talking about various frivolous topics, I had ignored their conversation but my ears pricked up when they began to whisper.

"Shhh! She'll hear you and make you spend all night brushing her hair out," Siliah said with a chuckle.

"At least you didn't have to put her hair up into that complicated nest. You should have heard her the whole time: 'Do you think he'd rather my hair be up or down? Do you think he'll like what I picked for lunch? Do you think he'll like this dress? What if he doesn't talk at all during lunch? What do I do?'" Damina laughed loud and then covered her mouth with her hand. She looked over to Jessmei and me but she must have thought I couldn't listen in on their conversation from so far away.

"She should have been more worried about spending all morning getting ready to meet him without even asking if he was available!" Siliah tittered.

"He is handsome, I agree with her, but so skinny! I can see the bones in his face and neck. I like my men with some meat on them," Yera whispered as she leaned over her knitting.

"You are only interested in one piece of meat on a man's body," Cerra commented as she picked up a bundle of thin orange yarn. The rest burst into laughter.

"Rumor is that he killed twenty of the Ancient soldiers bringing Jessmei back from Vanlourn. Then at the banquet he killed a dozen more that showed up to demand that the king bow before them," Levie said.

"No. Look at how skinny he is. He probably can't even lift his fork!" Yera said with a laugh.

"Let us hope the rumors are at least half-true, she'll need someone to protect her from the king when he finds out she is having lunch without Greykin's guards in attendance," Siliah said.

"What are you thinking about?" Jessmei pulled my attention back to her. I had been looking at the handmaidens past her but she probably believed I was looking at her.

"Sorry. I was studying you,“ I said, as I smiled at her. "Your hair looks beautiful, as does your dress. Thank you for inviting me to lunch. You have made a stressful day very pleasing." I hoped the compliments made her feel better.

"Oh. Well, I figured we hadn't talked so . . ." Her face reddened and she turned quickly back toward the brook. I could see her fight back a smile. It made her even prettier, if that was possible.

"What are you planning for lunch?" I asked before the tension between us grew any more.

"It is going to be delicious! Let's start the first course!" She waved into the shadows of the trees and I heard a pair of feet patter away. I guessed it was the servants going to fetch the food.

"Tell me about the young prince that escorted you at the banquet," I said, changing the subject to one I hoped would put her at ease.

"Rilc?” She waved her hand dismissively. “There is not much to tell, he is three winters younger than me and a pompous dullard. The king of Loorma wants us to be wed. I hope it does not come to that. I have a few more years before my father will decide whom I wed, and I have shared my opinion of Rilc with him. He loves me enough to take it under consideration, but in the end he will have to choose the union that will provide the best political alliance for Nia.”

"What does 'wed' mean?" I heard the servants approaching.

"It means joined or married," she said, her face slightly shocked. "I guess Paug hasn't taught you that word yet?"

"No. What does 'joined' or 'married' mean? He spoke of it during the banquet but I'd like you to tell me of it. Didn't you say something about us being joined at the inn when I asked you to be my lover?" I questioned as the servants put the dishes of the first course down in front of us. It was a variety of red and green vegetables with bits of bread, cheese, and yellowish cream spread on top. The servants filled up our water and then poured new glasses of bright yellow wine. I could smell its sweet aroma a few feet from the glass. It all looked and smelled delicious.

I realized that Jessmei and the servants’ hearts were beating extremely fast. I looked away from the food toward them. It was two women, they looked straight ahead into the trees, not at Jessmei or me. Sensing danger, I peered into the brush. I didn't hear or see anything. I looked back at Jessmei. Her face was white and her mouth hung open in horror as she looked at me.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

"Nothing!" she blurted out. "I'll signal for the next course," she said curtly to the servants, they quickly moved back to their positions at the edge of the tree line. Jessmei picked up her fork and knife and put one of the pieces of culinary art on her plate. Then she carefully cut into it. She avoided eye contact with me as she sliced the morsel into tiny half-bite sizes. Her heart was still thundering in her chest.

A minute passed and I hadn't taken any food yet. She still looked at her plate, avoiding my eyes.

"Did I say something wrong? I don't understand what those words mean. Please forgive me." I had obviously done something to upset her.

"I can’t believe you just said that," she hissed under her breath. She put her fork and knife down and looked up at me. The frown made her beautiful nose upturn a bit.

"Sorry Jessmei. I really don't understand. If you prefer, I can ask Paug to explain marriage more in depth," I apologized again.

"No!" she blurted out again, then she looked to her entourage and back to me. "I'm not talking about your first question. I'm talking about when you asked me about the inn and us being lovers," she was whispering again.

"Yes. I didn't know how to ask you to be my lover then. But I thought I did a good job of indicating it with my hands. Then you mentioned something about joining. Is that the same thing as marriage?"

"You asked me that in front of the servants!" she gasped as she realized she had yelled it out. Her handmaidens looked over to us.

"Cerra! Can you play some music, please?" Jessmei said as she looked back over her shoulder. The woman nodded and walked over to a gathering of yarn and knitting tools. Hidden behind the pile was a small string instrument. Jessmei waited for her to go back to her seat and begin playing before she continued.

"The servants will spread a rumor that we are lovers. That is not good," Jessmei said. She did look very distressed.

"I'm sorry. I don't want to cause you displeasure," I said sincerely. I was still unsure as to why the women I had met all seemed so offended and scandalized by the mere mention of sex.

We sat for a few minutes in silence. She picked up my plate and put two helpings of the vegetables on it before setting it back in front of me.

"What's done is done," she sighed. "Please eat. It makes me happy to see you enjoy a meal."

I took a few bites and it was amazing. The vegetables were slightly spicy and I had to wash them down with a swallow of the sweet wine.

"There is one solution I have," I couldn't hide the smirk that was spreading across my face.

"Oh?" she said with an eyebrow raised. She put her fork down and dotted her mouth with the cloth napkin.

"It doesn't have to be a rumor."

She looked at me again in shock, her hand covering her mouth to hide her surprise.

"You are crazy!" she whispered to me. "My father would kill me, and he would set all of his soldiers on you!" she suddenly giggled and stuck her tongue out at me. "I bet you would like having all the soldiers chasing after you. I think you would still beat them." She smiled at me.

"Yes. That would be fun. There aren't any guards around are there?" I took another slow bite of the vegetables.

"No. How did you guess? I wanted some time with you, alone. Greykin has warmed up to you but he would never let us be like this." She smiled again. Her heart had slowed down after I had embarrassed her in front of her servants.

"Like what?"

"Sitting here, eating together, and talking." She brushed the hair back from her ear and looked back at her handmaidens.

"I have good hearing," I said with a smile. "Their favorite topic of conversation seems to involve you and me."

"Really?" she looked back at them quickly.

“Perhaps," I said to her with a wink. She frowned at me again. It was a playful frown.

She waved over the servants to clear the plate.

"Don't say anything naughty while they are within earshot,” she warned as they got closer. Within seconds the plates had been cleared and they disappeared.

“Why is this such a concern, what you do, even what people think you have done?”

She looked at me and cocked her head to the side. “You really don’t understand?”

I shook my head.

Jessmei absently played with the rim of her wine glass, rubbing the tip of her finger around the edge where her lips had been. “You know our kingdom is ruled by a monarchy?” I nodded. “The king rules until he dies, then his son takes over, and so on. It is the same in all of our neighboring kingdoms. The princes must continue to produce offspring--male offspring--in order to keep their family in power. Does that make sense?”

“And they can only produce offspring with other royalty?”

“Exactly. If I am . . .” she blushed and looked away, “doing something that would possibly create a child with someone else, my value as a future queen would be diminished. Diminished is putting it lightly.” She smirked. “By joining me with the prince of another kingdom, my father would create a strong alliance and a familial bond between our countries.  If it is suspected that I have,” she paused, searching for the right word, “been intimate with another man prior to this joining, my husband, the future king, would have no assurance that our offspring was truly his child, and the proper heir to the throne. This could cause great political unrest, possibly even a war. Therefore, he cares very deeply about what I do, even just what people think I have done, as you said. Do you understand?”

“He cares because you are his daughter and he loves you. I am sure he wishes for your happiness.”

She looked away and smiled brightly, her eyes were tight. “Of course he loves me. It’s just the way things work.”

The servants came and delivered the next course as she finished talking. It was thinly packed patties of roasted meat that sat upon small platforms of wild black rice and peppers. I couldn't identify the meat, but it smelled amazing. After the servants left we began on the new course and it tasted better than I could have imagined. The meat was soft and melted into my tongue with a savory warmth that paired perfectly with the nutty flavor of the black rice and the spicy peppers. I tried to enjoy the taste slowly, but I was so hungry I quickly finished the first portion and was relieved to see they had given me three times the amount they had served Jessmei.

I heard several pairs of metal rimmed boots descend the stone pathway behind our garden clearing and the castle. Jessmei looked over my shoulder and her brows knit into pretty ruffles. I figured it was Runir, it sounded like his footfalls and he had probably had enough time to wake up, gather some guards, and find me. I didn't bother to turn around and face him.

"Dear Sister, I had hoped I would find you here. It seems that your guards have misplaced you." I looked over my shoulder at Jessmei's brother, Nanos. He wore a dark gray tunic that was tinged with blue. It was tucked into chocolate-colored leather pants that were wrapped in strategically placed light plates of armor and chain. He had a slightly curved long sword hanging from his left side and a shorter sword slung horizontally across the curve of his lower back. He was older than Jessmei, probably a year younger than Nadea. His skin looked tan and he had a body that was lean and wiry. He was escorted by three guards: a woman and two men that looked at me with expressions that matched a stone wall. They were all wearing light chain armor and had swords similar to what the prince was wearing.

"Ahh. I can see why the guards misplaced you. You wanted our powerful guest all to yourself," the prince said as he turned to look at me. "I'm Prince Nanos," he said as he extended a leather clad hand.

"Kaiyer," I said as I grasped his hand from my seat.

"Most people rise in front of royalty." He remarked coldly to me when our hands shook. I almost sighed out loud.

"I heard that most people don't kill four Ancients," I said as my grip tightened. His eyes opened wide as pain shot through his arm.

"Fair enough!" he said and tried to smile. I released his hand.

"Are you going to join us for lunch?" I asked Nanos as I turned back to my food and took another careful bite. Jessmei bit her lower lip. I recognized the fear in her eyes.

"I was considering it." He paused. I took a few more bites of food. "You know, most don't turn their backs on royalty either." I set down my fork and looked at Jessmei. Her face looked abashed. I didn't want to harm the relationship with her brother but it seemed that Nanos and Runir attended the same school of fatuousness. I was sick of these fools telling me that I couldn’t kill Elvens and that I had to obey their other arbitrary rules.

"You are interrupting our meal. I consider it, and your sister's hospitality to be more important than your frivolous need for affection. Either pull up a chair and join us or go find a small dog to play with."  I picked up my fork again and continued to eat. Jessmei looked at her brother in shock. I could hear the prince's heart begin to beat faster as he registered the insult. He probably wouldn't be having lunch with us.

"How dare you say that to me?" the prince said as he moved around from behind me to the side of the table so he could try and make eye contact with me.  I wiped my mouth with the cloth napkin and then took a sip of the wine. Jessmei's heart was galloping quickly in panic. I also heard the hearts of the guards pick up speed. I had probably made a mistake again. Maybe the prince was so hotheaded that he would do something idiotic.

"My apologies. I am unfamiliar with your rules of royalty," I said as I swallowed and looked into his enraged face. He didn't seem to take my apology seriously, and he shouldn't have, since I didn't really mean it sincerely. I didn't want him to do something to upset Jessmei. I knew that she had planned this lunch with me and would be saddened if I caused her brother to ruin it.

"You need to be taught how to properly respect someone of my bearing," he spat down at me.

"Are you capable of that? Or are you going to turn the task over to your three wet nurses?" I nodded my head back to his armed escorts. I just didn't seem to know how to play nice with these people today.

His face turned red with outrage. It looked like he was being strangled. His hand reached for his sword, but before his fist closed around the grip my hand had wrapped around its guard and the sheath. He tugged at it but my grip prevented it from coming out.

"That's a bad idea," I said to him with a smile. He tried a few more times before he tried to pull away from me. He may as well have been pulling on a chain anchored into the castle wall.

I looked over at his guards but they had their arms crossed, watching me carefully. Their hearts were beating fast so I wondered if they would draw their weapons if the prince commanded it. I saw fear in one of the men's eyes and guessed that they didn't want to fight me.

I stood up from my chair and lifted the prince easily above my head with the arm that was grabbing onto his sword and sheath. He gasped in terror as he felt his body leave the ground and spin sideways. Jessmei and her handmaidens let out a scream of surprise and he started to yell and shout.

"What are you doing? No! Let me down! I command you!" He struggled and tried to kick his feet so that I would drop him. I looked over at the guards, their stone faces were now painted with shock. They still didn't draw their weapons, but they opened their arms and moved closer to me as if I would toss him to them.

It was a few steps to the edge of the creek. I let go of the prince over a deeper part of it and jumped back so his noisy splash wouldn't get onto my new outfit. Jessmei and her handmaidens let out another yell of surprise when the water almost hit them.

Nanos sputtered and cursed as he struggled to right himself in his wet clothes. The water was only three feet deep, so he wasn't in any danger of drowning.

"Your sister and I will continue our meal now. Come back when you are in a better mood," I said as I walked back to my chair and sat.

The prince waddled half a dozen steps to get on to the dry land, raining down water as he stepped out of the murky pond. He had some lily pads hanging over his shoulder and his perfectly styled hair was in disarray. He took a step toward me as I sat at the table and put his hand on his sword again.

"Not one of your best ideas," I said as my eyebrow rose. He looked over to his guards. They hadn't moved at all to aid him. I pointed back in the direction he came from. "Go." He looked back at the women knitting and they all had their hands over their mouths, I couldn’t tell if they were about to cry or laugh at him. He glared at me, then at Jessmei, and walked quickly toward the castle with his guards. His boots made wet, sloppy noises on the grass and gravel.

I continued to eat for a few minutes, until the sound of their boots and Nanos's curses faded into the castle and moved down the hallways.

"I can't believe that you did that!" Jessmei said. Her face was so animated that I couldn't discern whether she was mad or pleased.

"He was being unpleasant." I had finished my plate and leaned back. I hoped there were other courses.

"He's the Crown Prince!" she stated as if I should have understood.

"He didn't seem to like me too much."

"He will be king after my father dies!" she exclaimed again.

"Your father seems young enough to rule for a long time. Your brother will be old and gray himself by the time he gets to rule. For the sake of your people, I hope he will have matured some in that time." Paug had explained their odd system of rulership through lineage.

"He will definitely tell my father I was here with you." She frowned a bit.

"You knew he was going to find out eventually. Your handmaidens or one of the servants would have told him. You must have thought this through before you invited me here." I smiled at her. She looked angry at me and then she smiled and another ray of sunlight entered the clearing.

"You're right." She brushed her hair back from her ear again. "I'm going to get into even more trouble than I already am." She looked toward the servants and waved them over to clear our plates. They did so with neat and efficient movements.

"You are turning the whole castle on its head," she said after the servants had refilled our water and wine. "No one has ever spoken that way to my brother. He deserved it. He's had his way around here for so long. Father and Mother coddle him and his sense of entitlement is so large you would think he is ruler over every country within three thousand miles." She looked back over to the creek where I had thrown him and giggled. "He is going to be fuming mad for weeks. I wish I could hear him tell Father and Mother about how you have wronged our family's honor by treating him like the child he is."

I nodded to myself. I seemed to recall Paug telling me that the prince and princess didn't get along, and her brief expression of terror earlier made me think his story was true.

"Didn't he see what you did to the Ancients? You tore them apart like they were nothing. I remember what you did to the Vanlourn soldiers. My brother should be bowing before you and thanking you for helping to save his future kingdom. At the very least he should fear your strength. He is such an ass."

As she finished, the servants brought the next course: a leafy salad with shaved nuts on top. We ate this in silence until Cerra began to play softly. The handmaidens were discussing how strong I must be to be able to lift the prince off of the ground with one hand and throw him into the creek.

"At least the servants will probably speak more about your confrontation with my brother than they will about what you said over the table," Jessmei said as she smirked at me.

"You worry about too many things. What is the worst thing that can happen? I'm sure your father loves you and won't torture you to death."

 I suddenly was in a different place.

Their screams filled the air from the valley deep below our position. There were hundreds of them, pushed into pens, their dirty, twisted bodies were thin from lack of nourishment.

"We hit their supply lines so hard they have started to eat their humans," Malek said from my side. His eyes glowed in the twilight as we studied the crudely constructed holding pens. There were only a handful of Elven guards.

"We will attack tomorrow night," I said under my breath as I began to crawl backward through the mud and branches in which we had concealed ourselves.

"They will eat at least ten of them tomorrow. We must attack tonight!" Malek whispered. He would have screamed at me if he could.

"No. It's a deception. All we have been doing is attacking their supply lines for the past three months while we dodge their scouts and main force." His eyes widened and he nodded.

"How can we be sure?" Alexia said as she landed on the ground next to me. She made no sound save a slight swish as her body cut through the air. "I didn't see any of them within a few miles.”

"It will be more of a burden on us to save them." I raised my hand up in the near darkness as we came to a clearing in the thick forest. “Tell the generals to meet me in my tent within fifteen minutes," I said to an almost invisible runner. She nodded and disappeared into the dark depths. There were almost two thousand of us concealed in these trees, but most Elvens could walk through and never hear or see our presence.

"Meet me in my tent," I said to the man and woman to my sides. They nodded and disappeared, attending to their own troops hidden in the forest.

We had been on the run for almost two years.

"Was it something I said?" Jessmei said as her fingertips brushed against the top of my hand. I blinked and looked back at her. My hand opened and I wrapped my fingers around hers. Her heart rate doubled. I thought she was going to yank back her hand but she entwined her fingers with mine and left it sitting on the table. Her skin was soft, and so were her hands, the muscles unaccustomed to work, her bones fine and delicate, fragile as a bird.

"Sorry. Just thinking about things. What did you say?" I smiled to her. My thumb traced a light line across the top of her hand.

"I said that I was more worried about what he was going to do to you. But then I realized that I shouldn't. He wants you to help us. Greykin filled me in a bit on what you have been talking about with Nadea and her father. Do you remember anything else that might help?" her pointer finger drew small circles on the palm of my hand. I looked into her eyes and they darted between mine and our entwined fingers.

"Nothing I haven't already told them." The lie came easy to my lips. I had never given them any details, except for the outburst in which I had told Paug about my brother and father.

"I'm sure you will remember soon." She smiled. "Nadea, Greykin, Maerc and our fathers were worried that you would be some sort of inhuman monster when they awoke you. The legends made it seem like you had almost destroyed our world when you fought with the Ancients." She smiled softly and her hand squeezed mine a little more. "But I don't believe those stories." I smiled back at her with my mouth alone, I could not otherwise fake warmth at the moment.

My memories were troubling. It was unclear, but I was starting to think perhaps I was the monster they had feared. Jessmei looked at me with innocent adoration and I hoped that I could be the man she believed I was. Whatever I had been in my past, here and now I did want to help her and Nadea. I could not bear the thought of them, or any of the humans I had met, being enslaved by the Elvens, enduring what the people of my time had. If I had been a violent man in my past it was not without cause or provocation. Did seeking vengeance and freedom make me a monster?

"Oh! The final course. You are going to love this. I had it prepared especially for us." She waved to the servants with the hand that had been entwined with my fingers and they cleared the table again. Within a few seconds they placed small, covered bowls before us. Then they both bowed and departed.

I touched the top of the mirrored silver cover and found it very cold. I looked at Jessmei with an eyebrow raised as I pulled the top off the bowl. Inside were three scoops of what looked like yellow bean curd. Chilled air rolled off of the metal like steam.

"Take a bite. It is amazing!" she said as she giggled and clapped her hands together. I picked up a spoon and took a cold bite. It tasted like bittersweet lemons mixed with milk and snow.

"Wow. That is really good." I took another bite quickly to confirm.

"I knew you would love it!" She scooped out a tiny bite of her serving.

I heard more footsteps behind me and guessed that our lunch was about to be cut short. I took a few large bites and smiled at Jessmei around a huge mouthful of the freezing lemon dessert. She giggled when I gobbled up another cold bite.

"You really do like it!"

"This has been very fun," I said as I hastily swallowed. "Thank you for inviting me. It helped me feel better about my day and what has been going on here. I enjoy your company."

"Of course! Thank you for coming. I am so happy to see you again." Her face was as radiant as the sun. I heard the booted feet growing closer to the edge of the tree line. I debated staying for whatever confrontation they had planned.

"There are many men coming," I told Jessmei urgently. "We have less than a minute before they get here. Do you want me to leave?"

"What?" she asked. Her face suddenly concerned.

"About fifteen of them. Are you going to get in trouble if I am here? I can leave back through the other side of the garden and be in my room before they go looking there. Should I?"

"No! Just stay. I don't care if they see you here with me. It is probably my brother and more of his buffoon guards."

"No. It is Maerc and men wearing heavy armor, and a woman. I would guess your mother." There were softer footsteps with the group and an angry woman's voice.

"Oh." Her face fell. She looked suddenly trapped. It was the only permission I needed.

"Cerra," I called to the blonde woman who was playing. She looked over at me. "Sit down in my seat quickly." She got up from her chair and walked toward us. "Quicker! Yera, sit in Cerra's chair." I told the woman sitting on the ground as Cerra dashed to the chair I had occupied. She continued to strum on her instrument as soon as she sat down, but she looked nervous. The remaining girls went back to their knitting, focusing on it like they were tasked by the Elvens to produce or die.

Jessmei was still sitting next to me. I could see tears welling up in the corners of her eyes.

"Sorry. It's my mother. She always takes his side. I really do not want that confrontation with you here. Please forgive me?" I nodded and smiled. Then I leaned down and kissed the tears that had started to drift down her cheeks.

"Don't cry. Let's do this again. I had a great time with you." Before she replied I dashed through the trees in the opposite direction. I went about thirty yards before I bounded up one and was able to get to a spot where I could watch the clearing and hear what transpired.

I was surprised as I realized that I meant what I said. Of course I enjoyed the company of a beautiful girl, but I had not anticipated enjoying our time together as much as I did. At first I had seen her as simply a naïve, dull girl. She was naïve, sheltered and young, a product of her strange upbringing, but she was also more passionate and interesting than I had realized. It was clear she cared deeply about other people, and she felt things strongly. I wondered what she could have been like under different circumstances. If she had been given the freedom Nadea had, rather than raised to be nothing more than the mother of future generations of royalty, what would she have chosen to pursue? I truly did want to spend more time with her.

Jessmei's mother, Maerc, Nanos, and a dozen guards stormed into the clearing like they were assaulting a fortress.

"Where is he?" Nanos almost screamed at Jessmei. He had changed out of his wet clothes but his hair still looked damp.

"Who?" she said coldly as she dotted her face with a napkin. "Hello Mother. Hello Maerc."

"Were you eating with Kaiyer?" Jessmei's mother demanded. She was beautiful like her daughter, with platinum blonde hair and eyes as icy blue as Jessmei's, but she lacked the princess’s warmth. She was still quite young, and judging by her son’s age, I reasoned she had been used as Jessmei soon would be, a diplomatic gift of good breeding stock, married when she was a very young woman.

"He was here but he left a little while ago," Jessmei said. I'm surprised you didn't see him. He must have entered the castle through the same door you used.

"Was a guard with him?" Maerc said with concern.

"No. We had just finished dessert and he said he had to get back to talk with Paug. Have you tried Paug's room?" Jessmei calmly lifted up a glass and drank the rest of her wine.

"Were you crying?" her mother said. Her pretty mouth was a hard line and I guessed the woman never smiled.

"Yes. Cerra played a beautiful sonnet for me and I found myself emotional."

I laughed to myself as I silently crept down from the tree. Jessmei could handle them easily enough. I didn't know my way back but as I jogged through the many hedge mazes and secret paths of the garden I eventually found an entrance into the castle. Then I walked around until I found my wing and was able to retrace the steps to my room. There were a few guards around that smiled back at me and returned my light conversation, but none in front of my door.

Maybe the stay here wouldn't be as dull as I thought? I needed something to fight. It looked like Runir and Nanos would be interesting recreation during the winter months.