“Welp,” Chilly said, slapping his knees. “I'm going to pretend that never happened.”

He got up and shook the excess white powder from his knees as he took another look around. The entrance of the gorge was rather pretty in its way; an abrupt introduction to winter. A refreshing chill after the brimstone-laden air of the fire domain. Ahead, the ground sloped down sharply, snow and ice hiding jagged rocks that lay cruelly under the surface, just waiting for an unsuspecting passerby.

“Second order of business: food and finding Haley,” Chilly said.

He began trekking forward through the snow, calling Haley's name as loud as he could while keeping an eye out for monsters. His voice echoed across the gorge.

He heard the faint sound of snow getting compacted. A soft crunch that reverberated at a low pitch. He paused mid call, freezing in the snow as he listened further. He briefly debated the intelligence of shouting in a hostile and unknown environment.

From behind a spire of ice that inexplicably rose from the frozen riverbed, a giant fur-covered creature emerged. It had four legs and a bulky horned head with an expansive mane that hid deceptively broad shoulders. A bison, but much more massive. Its fur hung low, each thick strand ending in sharp icicles that gleamed in the cyan light.

Chilly sighed in relief as he noticed its level. Three levels below him shouldn't be too difficult to fight.

Time stopped as Chilly and the bison stared at each other. Like two trains passing in the night, it seemed for a brief moment that the bison would turn and continue on its way. It was not meant to be, however. There was an alien madness in the bison's eyes, a rage that flared the moment its gaze fell upon Chilly.

The beast charged, and the moment was broken.

Snow erupted up in a plume behind the beast. Its powerful hind legs churned the earth as it accelerated towards Chilly at a frighteningly quick pace.

Chilly hunched down, a broad grin lighting up his face, as he unleashed Incinerate. Fire flooded across the intervening space, engulfing the beast and making it roar out in rage and pain.

Plasma joined the fire when the beast got near, as Chilly prepared to Flame Dash out of the beast's charge. Its dark fur was obscured by the cloud of white powder thrown up by the aggressive charge. Steam flashed out, as fire and plasma tunneled through the cloud and began to melt the icicles on the beast's fur. A second later Chilly vanished in a burst of bright fire.

Spoiler :

https%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FxWK4UGT.gif [https://i.imgur.com/xWK4UGT.gif]

Chilly stumbled as he rematerialized. His legs buckled, and for a brief second, he lost control of them. A bone-deep chill radiated out of several parts of his body. Sapping him of strength. His chest felt cold. His stomach felt bloated. He couldn't feel his toes.

What?

He blinked, and the world tilted. Belatedly, he threw a hand out, but his balance was all wrong and it only made the fall worse.

He shot a glance at his life, but if he had taken damage, it had recovered before he could notice it dip.

His stomach convulsed. He tried to speak, but all that came out were the contents of his stomach. A wave of blood-tinged water splattered onto the snow as he felt something get stuck halfway up his throat. He hacked. Water dribbled out of his nose as he felt horrible heartburn well up. It was as if someone had rammed an icicle down his esophagus.

In the distance, the bison slowed its charge, digging its hooves into the snow, as Chilly blinked at it in incomprehension. The frost bison's ragged fur was devoid of icicles. As he watched, the beast huffed out a plume of hot air from its nose that coalesced around itself and reformed the icicles at the tips of its hairs.

He whimpered as his stomach emptied itself again. The sensation itself was oddly free of pain, though the muscle convulsions were still unpleasant. This time a large chunk of ice made its way out of his mouth to plop wetly in the snow. He stared at it in disbelief, as relief flooded through him and some warmth returned.

How in the... what?

He felt pressure behind his kidney. He twisted around and felt a lump underneath his skin that was slowly growing like a cancerous tumor. His eyes widened in horror as the skin split and the bloody remains of a half-melted icicle plopped out. The skin sealed up instantly, leaving only a faint smear of blood-tinged water as evidence of the gruesome event.

Did my blood freeze? he thought as he noticed other lumps of melted ice get ejected from his body. Everything felt numb and cold, but as comforting heat rose from his cape, the feeling faded.

He blearily noticed the bison gathering itself for another charge. The last of the cold left him, as he rolled to his feet to face it. He hunkered down to face the beast’s charge, Starfire Aegis' plasma ripping out and tearing sizzling scars across the beast's back and snout. It was already looking bloodied. Cauterized burns covered its body, and it stumbled forward with a distinctive limp from only brief contact with Chilly's flames.

Just before the beast reached him, he cast Flame Dash; the action was almost instinctive after the hundreds of dodges he had done against the Blackrock Juggernaut. He vanished and reappeared only for the bone-chilling cold to return.

Fool me twice, Chilly gritted his teeth and shot the bison an analytical look. Once again all the icicles had disappeared from its coat. A glance down revealed where all of them had gone.

Spikes of ice poked out of his body like some kind of horrific pincushion. Despite appearances, it didn’t seem to damage him enough to cause real pain. Most of the ice was under the surface, invisible and being forcefully ejected by his regeneration. A lump of cold in his chest indicated that he had ice in his stomach.

...Again.

A second later, he regurgitated a painful lump of ice that had appeared in his esophagus.

What a bloody uncomfortable experience, he thought, My fault I suppose. The bison was somehow getting ice into him the moment after he used Flame Dash.

The bison prepared for another charge, its billowing breath reforming the crystalline ends on its hairs that gleamed in the cyan light. Chilly spat out a gobbet of watery blood as he scowled at the beast. It pawed the snow, raising another plume of white powder that protected it marginally against Chilly's flames.

It charged at him once again. Incinerate reached out to meet it, as Starfire Aegis joined the party. Fire and plasma burnt hairs and severed icicles, leaving the beast in poor shape, but not taking it down before it reached Chilly. The gigantic animal crashed into him with the weight of a freight train.

He grunted as he tumbled back.

Spoiler :

https%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FFSEvTLz.gif [https://i.imgur.com/FSEvTLz.gif]

He closed his eyes and enjoyed the sudden acceleration, like being on a particularly aggressive roller coaster ride. A second later however he landed in the snow, his cape hissing as it vaporized the snow clinging to his back.

He rolled to his feet. Getting knocked back was exhilarating when it didn't hurt. He turned to face the beast once again. It was in very bad shape, limping on one leg, with little splotches of ash indicated its scorched status ailment. It let out a pitiful moo, as Chilly took a couple of steps toward it and Starfire Aegis whipped out a streamer of superheated plasma that wrapped around its head. With a final groan, the giant beast fell.

No kill-notification appeared because it was at such low level. That was fine and expected. Chilly had mostly fought the beast for the meat it could provide. He quickly stepped back to make sure that Starfire Aegis would not turn the monster's corpse to ash before he could harvest it.

He let out an annoyed sigh and pulled out one of the eight regrets he had kept from his original dragon's horde. It was one of the few essences that he had brought all he had with him since he had known that he would get the most use out of this particular essences during this trip.

He cracked it and absorbed the white light as he unspecialized Star Fuel for now. It was deeply frustrating that the ability was non-discriminatory, but its power was undoubted.

He looked around the arena of disturbed snow. The short engagement had done a number on the smooth expanse. He put both hands to the side of his mouth and called once again into the air.

"Haley!". When no response came, he shrugged and stepped towards the bison's body.

Lacking a knife, Chilly struggled to get past the beast's thick hide, but after a gratuitous amount of cursing, and several broken shards of ice and rock, Chilly looked past the burnt outer hide and into the dark red meat within. The cut was ragged and probably would have ruined any leather that could be made from that side of the hide, if it hadn’t already been destroyed by the fire. Victorious, he pulled out a bloody steak and held it up proudly to the penguins.

They cheered him on, as he put the steak to the side with a big grin, and turned back to the body to collect more. After several minutes he was covered in blood up to his elbows but had several gleaming steaks laid out on a pristine patch of snow.

Now in the home stretch, he hurried to collect a suitably flat rock that he laid on his cape to begin heating it. The plasma from his cape combined with careful bursts of Incinerate quickly heated the stone to the point where it was lightly steaming in the cold air. Chilly placed the least mangled of the steaks on the rock, and could barely contain himself as a telltale sizzling and rich musty aroma filled the air. Overeager, he put on two more steaks and watched in anticipation.

Chilly impatiently scrubbed his gauntlets in the white snow to clean them as he waited for the steaks to sear. He was still covered in blood, but at least his fingers would be clean for the meal. When the steaks were ready on one side he hastily flipped them, careless of the minor damage the hot meat inflicted. He had survived lava damn it! This was nothing.

"Bon appetit!" Chilly crowed happily when he judged the meat to be finished. He stuffed the first succulent steak into his mouth, and promptly melted into a pile of satisfied goo. The beef was tough, stringy, and lacked even basic seasoning, but to Chili's starved palette it tasted like heaven.

Stolen content warning: this tale belongs on Royal Road. Report any occurrences elsewhere.

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Chilly chewed as fast as he could, swallowing huge chunks, as he quickly filled up the impromptu pan with more fresh steaks. He finished the first, and quickly swallowed the second and the third, gleefully watching the notifications buzz by.

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“Keep your eyes buttered,” said a voice to his side. Chilly peeked to see a penguin looking at him seriously.

“Man, could I do with some butter right now.” Chilly hummed wistfully, happily chucking several more raw steaks into his impromptu frying pan.

“What’s butter?” came a distinctly feminine voice.

Chilly froze and shot a look around. A knight wreathed in shadow stood a dozen paces down the gorge. The knight had a worn knapsack strapped to their back, and a pair of short blades on either hip, though neither was drawn. In their arms, they were holding an upside-down iron helmet full of what looked like dirt.

Uh oh, he thought as he rapidly chewed the rest of the grisly steak in his mouth and swallowed the lump.

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Play it cool. You got this.

He raised a blood-smeared arm in greeting and grinned wide. “Ahh! You must be Cathy, my name is Chilly. It is a pleasure to finally meet you. Do you...want some?”

Chilly gestured to his meal. He was starving but there was plenty and it seemed rude not to invite the knight.

The knight visibly recoiled, "Ah, no...no. That looks...bad."

"Oh..."

Chilly glanced at the bison. It did kinda look gruesome. He had sorta just ripped into it.

"Sorry for the mess, I wasn't expecting guests," Chilly said lamely.

Chilly almost winced as Haley leaned forwards.

“Ahuh, you can't actually see through my ability, can you? How did you know I was there last time?”

Damn, I made her mad...

“Haha," Chilly smiled wanly, "I can't see you, but my friends can.”

“Your friends?”

“Yes, the penguins.”

“...penguins?”

“Yeah the penguins, you can’t see them? They are all around us.”

“So you are crazy!” she gasped.

“What? No! I’m not crazy. Come on guys, show yourselves, you’re making me look bad.”

“Thanks for the Chapter!” the penguin chirped.

Chilly turned to Chaeli in vindication, “hear that?

“Nope! Wow, you hear voices. What do they sound like?”

“Yes. No! I’m not crazy. The penguins are actually there. They’re just...shy. Apparently.” Chilly sent a death glare at the penguins.

"Wait! How can the voices in your head see me if they aren't real?"

"They are real!"

“...are you sure?”

“Yes.”

“Ok then, what do...penguins look like?”

“Blue balls of fluff and evilness.”

“They’re evil?” she gasped.

“No, well. Not usually. They are being right gits at the moment.”

“What’s a git?”

“A despicable person. Yeah, I'm talking about you!" He stabbed an accusing finger at a melodramatic penguin.

"You just spoke to them!" She pointed, wide-eyed.

"I'm...yeah. Look, Haley-”

“Chaeli.”

“What?”

“My name’s Chaeli, not Haley.”

“Oh.”

Chilly deflated, this was not going to plan. He should stick to the plan, and ask her to help him with the Hellbringer. The reflected cyan light off of the snow shimmered over her pristine armor. His armor was dirty and dull in comparison. Dried blood made it look rusty, and soot stains covered it. Her armor was immaculate. Each piece was made out of different metals. The helmet for example was a deep azure that seemed to embody the boundless depth of the ocean.

“Do all humans have egg heads?” Chaeli interrupted his thoughts.

“Egg...” Chilly reached a hand up to cover his bald pate, a faint blush rising to his cheeks.

"And now you're turning pink!" She giggled.

Chilly felt a muscle under his eye twitch.

“No, I normally have short black hair.” He said firmly. “It just burned all off recently because I...wait a second. What do you mean by human?”

“You're human. Aren’t you?”

“Well, yes. Aren’t you?”

“Eww. How could you even suggest such a thing?”

Was she not human? Chilly quickly backpedaled. “Ahh! Might I just say that you have a beautiful breast-met. I mean! Helmet. You've got a beautiful helmet.”

Help me, he shot a pleading glance at the penguins

“Aww, thank you.”

Safe.

"Yours is pretty ugly, but I like your head. It's pink and shiny."

Oh, it hurts... You got this... Just keep going.

“Can you take off your," Chilly coughed, "very beautiful helmet so I can see your face? You can see mine.”

There was a brief silence as Chaeli stood stiffly before him.

“... Hello?”, he prodded.

“I...fine.” She dumped her iron helmet into the red snow. The bison blood was spreading as the animal carcass started freezing in a gelatinous mess. Then she reluctantly took off her azure helmet.

“You’re a stick person!” Chilly gasped.

“Wha-, you-. How dare you!” she sputtered.

“...but you’re made of wood.”

“You’re made of meat. That doesn’t make you a meat person!”

Chilly thought about that for a second. “Fair point. So what are you?”

“I am a Warforged,” Chaeli puffed up proudly.

Ah, that made sense. The system did identify her as such. What did the system identify him as? Probably a human.

“Cool,” he said.

“Cool?”

A penguin began tapping its foot impatiently on the side. Chilly frowned at it. It turned to him, gesturing sharply with its sword twice in a ‘get on with it’ gesture.

“Yeah, I’m getting to it,” Chilly muttered.

“You did it again! You just talked to a voice!” Chaeli gasped.

“Penguins. Not voices, but yeah.”

“What did she say? Does she like me?”

“Uh, he wants me to get on with it.”

“Is that why you were calling for me like a Vamoose in season?”

That felt vaguely like an insult but he decided to leave it be for now. “Yeah, I need your help taking on a few battles in the fire domain. I just need a little bit more damage. It’s going to be dangerous but-”

“Pfft,” Chaeli laughed. She clasped her hands behind her back and leaned forward.

“What?” Chilly crossed his arms.

“It's a level nine zone. I’m level fourteen, it should be a walk in the park!”

“...So you’ll help me?”

“Sure sounds like fun! What are we going to do there?”

“We are going to have to kill three sub-bosses. I can take on two of them, but the last one I don't have enough damage for. Oh, and the Hellbringer.”

“Really! That’s awesome. I’ve always wanted to challenge the Hellbringer. The forerunners took care of all the earlier bosses and Gar-Khan never let me go back for any of the hard battles since.”

“Oh, ok,” Chilly said, unsure of himself. He had expected this part to be harder. “I was going to give you a bunch of essences to convince you-”

“Essences? Gimme!”

“What, oh. Ok. Sure.”

“Aww, you are so poor.”

“Rude.”

“And so ugly!”

“Hey...that’s uncalled for.”

“Don’t worry, it's not your fault. We just need to cover up all the fleshy bits in beautiful four-stat Aredrite or Electrum. And then you’ll be looking, mhmm!”

“Are you a crafter then?”

“Nah, but we don’t have any real crafters in Teluria ‘cuz they all went off to Cankerton so if you want pretty gear you have to make it yourself.”

“Cool, I’ve been trying to craft stuff but I don’t really know what I’m doing with it.”

“I can tell, you’re really ugly right now.”

“That’s just because I haven’t been able to take a bath in a while. I’m normally much more h-handsome.”

“If you say so.” she pursed her lips.

“Anyway…”, he continued, Why are you here in the Frozen Gulch? Are there good monsters to fight here?”

“Nah, I’m scouting around for you. I lost you after you disappeared a couple of cycles ago in the Prison, but it looks like you beat old Purity, and rushed off to Sooty’s Hell.”

“Yeah, that’s what I did. Why were you looking for me?”

“I was supposed to try and recruit you. I thought it was a bad idea ‘cuz you’re crazy, but Gar-Khan thought we should give it a try.”

“I'm not...”

“Don’t worry, you’re ok for a human. Well, you’re the first human I’ve ever met, but you’re ok compared to a Draele. So yeah.”

“Uh-huh. So who is this Gar-Khan fellow?"

"He's my boss, and the head of the resistance!"

"What do you guys...resist?”

“The dungeon dummy! We are trying to get out. The Desecrator is a...right git. Did I do that right?”

“Yeah, you did...is there sunlight outside the dungeon?”

She cocked her head in confusion, “yes?”

“Cool, I’m in.”

“You are? I didn't even tell you about Rahlin’s beer.”

“No need, I’d like to get out too.”

“Ha! Suck it Deela!" She coughed, her pale blonde oak skin growing a shade darker. "I mean. That was easy. Gar-Khan made it sound so much harder.”

“Your boss right?”

“Yeah. Gar-Khan the Bold! Head of the resistance. He is awesome. He is back in Teluria, come on I can introduce you. Wait! How fast can you run?”

“Decently fast?” Chaeli slumped in disappointment, “Could we...Chaeli, are you okay?”

“I guess, what were you saying?” Chaeli replied sadly.

Okay then...

“Could we go take care of the fire domain first? I have a friend waiting.”

“It's not one of your...penguins is it?”

“No. You will be able to see them. My friend I mean.”

“Cool, I didn’t think there was anyone else over there. Are you sure you didn’t imagine them?”

“They are real,” Chilly deadpanned.

“If you say so.”

"So are the penguins."

"If you say so..."

Chilly sighed, It didn’t sound like she believed him. Like at all.

The penguin from before stepped up and grabbed Chilly’s attention with a flipper bob.

“Within frozen soil, a toe may yet bloom.”

Chilly frowned at the penguin, then looked around. His eyes settled on the iron helmet Chaeli had placed in the snow. “What’s the iron helmet for?”

Chaeli froze. “Damn, I forgot. I was supposed to give it to you at the start.”

“Well, you can give it to me now.”

“Here,”

“It's a...helmet full of dirt.”

“It was supposed to be part of the recruitment package. Kinda like Rahlin’s beer.”

“I...see,” Chilly did not.

“Do you like it? I collected it, especially for you. I had to dig through like a mile of snow to get it.”

“I...sure? Uh, yeah, I guess. Thank you.” Chilly gingerly held the helmet to his side, not at all sure what he was supposed to do with it.

"Awesome, let's hurry up and gooo!" Chaeli dashed forwards.

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