Nina unlocked and pushed open her front door in a single, nearly-orchestrated motion, much like the rest of her actions. What awaited her was the same that every past day had brung; a suffocating silence and dreary dim-lit hallway. Even still, her mind was preoccupied with the day's events at school. How long has it been since anything out of the norm has happened?, she thought to herself.
"What a brute," Nina muttered under her breath, vivid images of Natsu's blood stained body sprung to mind. She could see why he was known as The Demon of Hatsuka High. As she meticulously untied and took off her shoes, she fixated on her soft looking hand and for a split-second, recalled Natsu's calloused hands - What the hell am I thinking about?
As if to shake off the unsettling feeling, she continued her practiced routine, shrugging off her coat and putting it on the hallway's hanger. Who am I to judge what people call him though. Not like The Ice Princess is any better, she thought to herself. Having finished, she looked up to find her home exactly as it always was. Clean. Immaculate. Familiar. Cold.
She walked toward the only place that provided a small semblance of comfort: her desk. Sitting down at her desk, Nina cracked open her textbooks, the weight of responsibilities pressing down on her shoulders, the thickness of the glass laid in front of her eyes focusing on the one thing that she felt she had to. Her studies, of which would surely lead her to success as her mom very often explained.
Nina's hands effortlessly penned out answers to the formulas and questions for the day, barely missing a beat as the difficulty increased, jumping from quadratic equations and complex formulas to a labyrinth of historical facts. Even yet, her mind was someplace else entirely. Why am I thinking about Natsu? The conversation wasn't really that big of a deal.
Focus, she willed herself as she steeled her resolve to get everything done before her mother got home. Her mind seemed even more split as the studying continued, as she wondered whether Natsu would keep his promise of coming to school tomorrow, It's the last piece of the puzzle, if he starts coming and even getting good grades, my standing in the school and college application will look even better.
CONCENTRATE, she told herself, more forecefully this time. This was the most distracted she had been, in a very long time, during her studying. It bothered her. Still, as if her mind was working on a way to make this line of thinking okay within her confines, she began to realize that this might be something worth bringing up to her mother. I mean, this is a pretty major event if I think about it. I can tell my mother that I can finally have a shot at being the graduating class's representative if I could bring even Natsu's grades higher. For a brief moment she felt relieved, and even a bit excited at what her mother's reaction might be.
But, how can someone get so.. untethered?, she wondered to herself, he doesn't seem to make any sense. How can someone live like that?. That thought was soon cut short, as a loud growl interrupted the silence of the room. Embarassingly, she looked down at her stomach, Guess it's getting a bit late, food might be good.
"Okay, okay," she conceded to the empty room, pushing her chair back with a screech that seemed too loud for the quiet house. She stood up, a little too quickly, and felt a rush of blood hit her head and cause her to stumbly slightly. As she checked her phone for the time, she realized with a sinking feeling that hours had gone by unnoticed. How could she have lost track of time so easily? She wondered, feeling a rush of anxiety and regret.
The hallways stretched out before her, leading to the kitchen. A simple task and a simple place, yet the kitchen was another mental battle of expectations set upon her by her mother. On the counter was a perfectly positioned, hand written, recipe book for the house's most common meals, all planned by her mother. Cooking for Nina had always been a double edged sword. On one hand, she felt at ease doing a repetitive and tangible task, because unlike the idealistic goal of "success", as soon as the recipe was complete and the steps followed, she would have a finished product. The fruits of her effort at the ready. On the other hand, even this task was one that her mother would, and had, carefully and harshly critiqued to her standards. Every attempt was an exam, like all other aspects of her life.
So, understanding the underlying battle that spanned in front of her, she took her battle station position and readied herself, armed with an army of knives and ingredients. A simple soup should suffice.., she thought before another thought intruded her mind, I wonder what Natsu is eating tonight.
To shake off the intrusion, she began slicing the onions on her board, each cut a silent whisper against the wood. She cut with the speed that only experience could bring, as her mental state slowly transition to one that she found only in moments such as this. Quietness. Ease.
This story has been stolen from Royal Road. If you read it on Amazon, please report it
A quick glance at the recipe card, seeing her mother's handwriting, brought forth a unique feeling of closeness to her that she did not get often. Tonight though, as if guided by an unknown external force, she felt compelled to do something she would otherwise have never dreamed of doing: changing a few of the quantities and ingredients to better match her tastes. Every action that strayed from the written words felt like treason, and yet she pushed forward. Honestly, this might end up tasting better now, I'm sure mother will enjoy it.
As she finished by adding a pinch of salt; one of the modifications she chose to make, a click at the front door brought Nina back to reality. Her heart nearly skipped a beat, a feeling somewhere between apprehension and nervous excitement at being able to tell the news to her mother. Her hands betrayed a slight tremble as she took the lid off the pot and brought out two bowls.
"Home already?," Nina inquired in a monotone voice, "I thought you had a late meeting today." She wiped her hands off on a dishtowel, steeling herself for the minefield of a conversation that accompanied her arrival. It felt to her as if she was walking on a tightrope every moment she spent near her mother.
"We went in prepared, so the ordeal was quicker than anticipated," Her mother responded in an equally cool tone, doing the same ritual that Nina had done coming into the home. Light footsteps down the hall got louder as Nina's mother's sillhouette grew larger and more defined, approaching the dining room.The scent of herbs and spices wafted through the air, emanating from the kitchen.
"Evening," Nina said as she came into focus, "I made dinner for us."
Her mother's eyes, lined with the day's fatigue, scanned the kitchen and dining room, lingering on a handful of spices left out on the counter. A shadow burrowed into her eyebrows, showing her distaste at the items not put back up yet. She sat down at the end of the table, "It smells.. Decent." She said.
"Thank you," Nina replied, her voice more steady than before, "I tried adjusting some of the spices a bit-"
"What was insufficient about the recipe we already had?" A frown creased her mother's tired visage, "And how long did this take you, experimenting with food? That effort would have been better spent on something of consequence."
Nina's heart sank, the compliment she'd hoped for dissipating like steam from the pot. She bit back her disappointment.
"I'll keep that in mind in the future." She meekly responded.
The duo ate in silence. The enveloping atmosphere was enough to choke Nina's confidence for the conversation to non-existence. Her mother ate carefully and slowly, while she scanned some documents she had laid out on the table in front of her. Even at home, she was so focused on work that Nina often wondered why she came home at all.
"The flavor is off." Was the only conversation that her mother invoked.
"Right. I'll revert to the recipe next time." Nina's cold tone was now back in full effect. Her mind wandered to the day's events, thinking back on the small but consequential victory of securing a chance at top of the school.
"Mother," she braced herself to explain what had happened, almost already hearing her dissaproval of having spent time convincing a notorius good-for-nothing to come to school. This, being a small town, meant everyone had atleast heard of him and his antics before, including her mother. Nina seemed to recall her speaking with another parent about him being a bad influence and someone to avoid, amongst other rumors and gossip relating to his family situation. Before she had even the time to go through these thoughts, her mother had already interjected.
"Your studies. How are they progressing?" Her mother's voice took an even sharper turn at this line of questioning.
"Good, mother."
"Good doesn't earn scholarships. You need to be striving for excellence."
"I know," Nina said, with a hint of quiet dejection, "I'm on top of it." I'm more like buried under it, she admitted to herself.
"Make sure that you are." Her mother's words felt final, ending any rebuttal needed. Nina simply nodded and finished eating quietly. "Since you're done, clean up and go study before bed."
Nina stood up and grabbed the bowls. She quickly cleaned them, and glanced over at her mother, still deep in concentration on the mounds of papers that had appeared almost instantly after eating. She went down the hall and inside of her room without a word.
***
Nina perched onto the edge of her chair, letting the cold wood of her desk press against her thighs. She fiddled with her pencil, rolling it in between her fingers, as she attempted her best to focus. The night was getting late, and she figured she had already done enough for now. She had practically finished two weeks worth of work already. It wasn't until her pencil snapped in half, driven by the pressure in Nina's grip, that she finally snapped out of her mind and decided to stand up.
She did a quick stretch before commencing her night time routing of brushing her teeth and showering. The hot water was soothing, and allowed her, much like when she cooked, to ignore what was ailing her mind at the moment.
As she got out and got into bed, she felt a heaviness that couldn't be attributed to sleepiness alone. It feels so controlled.. I wonder what Natsu would do in this situation, she found herself wondering. It felt like something had clicked, and she knew why she felt so intrigued by him. He doesn't seem to worry or mind authority telling him what to do. He seems.. free. She couldn't help but compare Natsu's carefree and rebellious nature to her own strict and controlled upbringing.
I hope he comes to school tomorrow.