Acedia stared at the fan on the ceiling. It was going full speed, trying to clear out the wisps of smoke from the room. The chimney of the stove caught most of it, but there was always a little escaping to try to fill the basement room.

Yvonne was the cook for the satanists. And the orphans. Because of course she was. The woman had cried through the night, but dragged herself out of bed early in the morning to cook for everyone. The children who barely knew she existed, and the cultists who were planning on murdering her.

And of course for one useless demon who couldn't change anything.

"More soup is okay right?" Yvonne said as she stirred the pot. "I'm afraid we don't have much. The master spent most of the money creating a revered one, so we've had to make due."

Acedia muttered something non committal. She didn't really feel like eating. She didn't feel like much of anything. Even wanting to die was too much effort right now.

Was this Gula's revenge she wondered. To have a string of people she couldn't help, that she couldn't save, all reminding her of her lost sister. Or maybe Gula was trying to help her still, from wherever demons went when they died.

Either way it was torture to her. Because she couldn't be helped.

"Alright." Yvonne ladled out two bowls of soup. "It's still a bit hot, even for a revered one. So be careful."

Acedia stared at the broth, steam rising. She could already tell the woman had put more of the meat into Acedia's bowl rather than her own. But then that made sense. They were going to kill her for being charitable after all.

After a moment's thought Acedia swapped the bowls. "I'll take this one." It was still a poor last meal, but Acedia didn't need to eat. Yvonne might as well have it.

"As you wish, revered one." Yvonne seemed confused but her naivety meant she didn't question Acedia. Which was good, because the bindings would have forced her to lie. She might not be able to escape the will of humans, but she wasn't going to help the bastards who enslaved her mind.

Yvonne coughed hesitantly. "It... should be ready, revered one."

Acedia looked down at the soup. She didn't feel hungry, but she knew Yvonne would be more miserable if she didn't eat. So she tasted a spoonful.

The soup was spicy. Yvonne had obviously added some of those peppers from the New World to cover the lack of ingredients. But it still had some body. Gula would have forced Yvonne to remake the whole thing, but Gula refused to work without all the ingredients she needed. And then some.

She noticed Yvonne was looking at her expectantly. "It's alright."

The woman beamed. "I'm glad to hear it, revered one!"

Looking at the woman smiling at her, something cracked in Acedia. It wasn't anything that gave her hope. Or even something that made her care about herself. But she just felt sick and tired of the false reverence. The lie that the world was feeding this woman. Hell all creation. "I'm Acedia. Not a revered anything."

"But-"

"Call me Acedia," she commanded.

Yvonne blinked, but bowed her head. "Yes, re- Acedia."

Acedia turned back to her soup, forcing herself to eat. She didn't know why she'd done that. She didn't even know what that was supposed to accomplish. But the bitter chunk of her heart for once approved.

"I can't believe the ritual will be complete today," Yvonne gushed in between mouthfuls. "It's too bad I can't tell the children." Yvonne sighed. "They haven't been given the truth you see. The master worked to teach them the precepts of the faith but in a more acceptable context. Perhaps once we win the great victory we can give them everything they need to know."

"I'm sure things will change," Acedia muttered. The kids had probably been trained to be good little cultists. Fanatical and unwilling to judge their superiors. The nice would be manipulated into sacrifices, the greedy and cruel into tools for their master.

Acedia wondered if this group's current master had been trained the same way. Or maybe she'd just been a normal cultist until the terror of an angel hunting her down caused her to lose her mind. It didn't really matter though, did it? The disaster was going to be the same.

She looked over at Yvonne. She could try to distract the woman perhaps? Send her out shopping or something to make this so-called master's plot a little more difficult?

The binding on her tongue throbbed before she could even voice the thought. She slumped. Even that was forbidden it seemed.

Yvonne looked at her. "Is something wrong, re- Acedia?"

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Despair soaked through her, but this time there was something more. Anger. Hate. "I'm tired. Tired of being owned by humans. Tired of this story repeating endlessly."

"I'm sure when the great one is-"

Acedia whirled on Yvonne. "When it's summoned it'll fight with the angels, and in the end a lot of people will die, and everything will go back to being the same, only more miserable! I'm tired of it! Tired of good versus evil. Tired of being the pawn in humanity's chess game against itself!"

The woman cringed before her anger, and Acedia deflated again. "Whatever. It doesn't matter."

They finished eating in silence, Yvonne giving her concerned looks. It only made the sorry mess more awkward. When they finished Yvonne took the bowls to the sink, before the two walked out into the antechamber.

Acedia grimaced as she saw the lead cultist there. The woman sickened her, and Acedia had hoped she wouldn't have to see her until after everything had gone to hell. Yvonne of course was happy. "Master. Is there something we can do?"

The woman smiled in return and Acedia's blood chilled. "Yes you can, my dear foolish Yvonne. You can die." The hateful knife with red runes appeared in her hands and time seemed to freeze.

It was foolish to be surprised. Acedia had known this was coming since yesterday. And yet seeing the knife, the horrible truth finally became real. Once again someone was going to die. And once again she was powerless to stop it. She couldn't even feel self loathing anymore.

Yvonne was still confused of course. The woman had been conditioned well. Yet as the cult master wound up for a stab Acedia could sense her slow understanding. The loss of faith. The acceptance of death. It called to her being. Acedia for Acedia.

And that was what broke her.

I will not feed on her death just for some morality play!

She stepped forwards. She was a weak demon, but she was still stronger than a human. As both the women gasped she swung her fist right towards the cult master's throat. I will kill you for using me.

She expected to fight the bindings, but instead they pulled her forwards. Of course. This would be consoling Yvonne. Such a foolish command. It was a bitter irony that she used humanities commands to free herself, but she was willing to accept that.

Her fist rushed forwards as time accelerated back to its normal flow. The cult master stepped back, but Acedia was faster. She was going to end this!

Pain exploded in her hand as a blood red shield appeared before her. It shot down her arm as her punch stopped cold. Of course. A magician would be protected against something as weak as a punch.

The shield faded and she saw the cult master's sneer a moment before the horrid knife tore into her side.

Crimson pain filled her eyes. She staggered and looked down. It had missed her heart, but it was lodged in her lungs. Unlike before the runes weren't trying to bind her. They wanted her dead. She wasn't sure how much she could survive. But this wound was fatal. She'd die slowly, but she would die.

The cultist's mocking eyes swam in her fading vision. "What a worthless gesture."

Worthless.

Useless.

No. Not this time.

She reached down and grabbed the blade's hilt. Sin demons weren't strong for demons. But they were stronger than any human.

Pain seared through her body again as she snapped the blade off in her body.

"Acedia!" Yvonne screamed as she fell to the ground.

The ceiling spun above her as she stared up at it. She was dying. Flashes filled her eyes and pops rang through her ears. For years she'd tried to die, and now that it was finally happening, she didn't want to.

Yvonne's face appeared above her. The woman was crying. Tears for a demon. How trite. And yet a thought squirmed out from the depths of her mind. Was this what Gula had seen in her last moments? Had her sister railed against humanity at the end as well?

No. Gula almost certainly had been worried about her. About all their sisters. That was who the woman was. Acedia was different.

But for the first time she was okay with that.

She blinked and Helena and Camila were looking down at her. Strange. Was she that far gone?

"Aoi! I need some help!" Helena yelled.

To Acedia's surprise the shrine maiden appeared over her as well. "You're real?" the demon managed to mutter through the blood.

"Yes," Aoi said. "We're real. Now hold still. We're going to help you."

Camila leaned back and pain shot through Acedia again. "Blade's out. You sure this was the right thing?"

"Either we heal her or she dies, and the blade makes healing impossible," Helena said. "Keep an eye out for other cultists. I think they're retreating but we can't afford a surprise."

"Is- is there anything I can do?" Yvonne asked. "She saved me from... She saved me."

Acedia looked up at the ceiling, away from the woman. "I didn't save you. I did it for myself."

She felt Aoi's hand on her shoulder. "It was for both of you."

The words were kind. Soothing. But she couldn't accept them. "I don't want this to be a redemption story," she sobbed.

"Nothing to apologize for," Camila said. "You just did the right thing because you wanted to."

The pain was fading. Her eyes were closing. "It's not working," Helena hissed. "Damn it Aoi, is there anything we can do?!"

And past all that she felt her name slipping away. She was no longer the demon of acedia. The knife was just an ornament. She'd started dying the moment she threw that punch. "What am I?"

Someone took her hand. "You're the sister of Gula, Invidia, Ira, and many other demons," Aoi whispered, soothing her like a child.

"You're my annoying demon friend," Camila's voice rang out. "Just like I'm your annoying dead friend." A note of hope behind tears.

A head pressed against her stomach. "You're the woman who saved me," Yvonne cried.

Darkness enveloped her. The cold was replaced with warmth. And finally Helena's voice came through, harsh with grief. "You'll find out. If not this life, then the next. I, Helena Aoede, swear it."

Next life? Did demons get next lives? She supposed she'd find out. But there was one thing left. "Did I stop them?"

"Yes. We couldn't have done it without you."

Acedia smiled as her consciousness faded. She wasn't worthless after all.