Tanisha felt like her entire life had been a series of events she wanted no part in and had no control over. It was as if the world had pushed her into roles she neither asked for nor deserved. Everything had been fine with her family until they discovered she was a wizard—or so they thought. That diagnosis turned out to be wrong, but not until years later, after so much damage had already been done. Of her whole family, only Helga, her eldest sister, had shown her unconditional love and support. The others? Her younger siblings, Eira and Ragnar, were practically trained to distance themselves from her, to see her as something less.
Her exile came swiftly. Thrust out of the only home she'd ever known, she found herself at the academy, where the isolation followed her like a shadow. But now, it wasn’t just her family who looked at her differently—at first, her peers expected her to be exceptional, just like the rest of the Salstars, legendary prodigies with few equals. The pressure to live up to that was suffocating, and when she inevitably fell short, the mockery and disdain that followed were almost unbearable. She became an outcast, alienated by her own people. The academy, a place of supposed growth, became another prison.
When she finally found friends and purpose her world would again be shaken by the death of Helga, the only one she considered real family. She threw herself into everything, desperately trying to find something—anything—that would make her worthy. If she couldn’t be a magical prodigy, she would find another way. She had to prove her worth, her right to the Salstar name. But time and time again, she failed. And when her family came for her, it wasn’t with open arms. It was with scorn, with the clear message that she still wasn’t enough.
She had her highs, summoning Bjorn, and meeting Joha, Helina, Owen, Tyr, Hrolf, Kolbien and so many more, learning magic, finding out she is a sage and becoming so much more than she was. However, she didn’t know if she liked the cost she had to pay in pain and loss. So many people she thought would be there for her have left this world to join the Forest Father or whichever True they worship. She had seen so much death and even taken part in causing more than her fair share in taking lives.
Now she was angrier than she had ever been. She knew where that feeling originated, but knowing why did not quench her anger. Through the most harrowing of her experiences the past two months she had Bjorn. He was her lighthouse in the storm, the rock in a sea of quicksand, an ever present ally and friend that believed and stood by her when the smarter choice would have been to flee. He had literally become everything to her and she felt him terrified, alone when he needed her and worst still she felt him die.
She had thought he had died before, once when he lost his first head defending her against the troll, again when the bird familiar all but gutted him but neither time was like what she had felt recently. The former incident was before their bond grew as strong and the latter she felt through the bond he would pull through. Last night was different. Last night she felt the bond shake in a way she hadn’t before. Last night she felt his terrified last moments, his regrets, his agony and she wasn’t there for him like he had alway been for her.
Sure she could blame the skinwalker, or the werewolves but at the end of the day she had failed him. She could have gone with him on the hunt or not let him go to begin with. She could have made it back to town earlier or instead of fighting the skinwalker fled immediately to find Joha. Instead she delivered herself and Bjorn into their trap and nearly got them both killed. She wanted all of them dead, the werewolves and especially Sabec.
***
The infusion basin was fully prepped and the process to separate the physical substances and its metaphysical nature would take a few hours. Tanisha was not idle at that time, she couldn’t let her mind wander or it would fall back into a self deprecating spiral. She went back to working on potions. She needed more Vital Elixirs, the side of potion making that a person could use on themselves such as healing, magic, and stamina recovery. All she had were her own personal supply that she would not sell just in case she needed them.
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“I can make a few lesser health potions before the infusion basin is ready.” Tanisha said out loud but to no one in particular.
Tanisha found that getting lost in her personal project was what she needed. The hours flew as she brewed potion after potion. When the basin was ready she stopped and watched the physical clash with the metaphysical in an unusual dance that left the dreamweaver blood in a state of contradiction. It was boiling and calm, hot and cold, liquid and gas at the same time. It was in this state that she could begin the process with the last remaining ingots she had. She looked at Bjorn who had stood to watch what she was doing with interest.
“I am going to try and infuse the essence of this dreamweaver blood and the powder into the blue steel ingots I got from Joel.” Tanisha explained. “I was trying before but I have to regulate the ambient mana in a way that it doesn’t flood the process and ruin the metal. Maybe you can help me with a solution. Watch this one.”
Tanisha readied her chosen ingot with the vintmoore ice silver tongs. After placing the ingot into the basin she again struggled to keep the ambient mana controlled. It was as if the world itself felt the vacuum and rushed to fill the void. The longer she kept the mana from collapsing the more mental and magical strain she had on herself. Then it inevitably collapsed like a dam falling to the weight of a tsunami.
“That’s what keeps happening every time.” Tanisha said through labored breaths as she took out the eighth ruined ingot. “This should be much easier, even a wizard can use infusion basins. I am a sage with three types of magic and I can’t figure it out.”
Bjorn tapped the ground to get Tanisha’s attention. He used his sharp nails to score the wood with a circle.
“Circle?” Tanisha asked.
Bjorn shook his head and continued to rotate his hand around and around. Tanisha's eyes opened wide, her mouth dropping open.
“Rotation! It is just like my core. It needs to spin and move, mana does not like to stay in one place.” Tanisha smiled and hugged Bjorn. “Thanks, Big Man! I will try it again right now.”
Tanisha got the basin ready and replaced the eighth ingot with the ninth leaving her only one more if this one failed. Just as before she pushed all of the ambient mana away and only allowed what the basin needed to feed the reaction. Moving and manipulating mana was a skill that most magic casters could perform. Thanks to Tanisha’s nature as a cernunnos and Sage she had a far more intrinsic connection to the magic sources that made up her core.
She moved her arms in wide sweeping slow and controlled motion as if steering the air. Her eyes shone with silver-gold light as she felt the ambient mana orbit around her and the basin instead of collapsing inward. It wasn’t exactly necessary to move her body to achieve this, but it gave a physical element to a mental and magical sensation allowing her to better visualize what she wanted.
“It’s working!” Tanisha said excitedly. “Bjorn that was it!”
She and Bjorn jumped with excitement. Not only was it easy to do now that she knew to spin the mana and not just hold it up she didn’t even have to put much thought into maintaining the motion. The ambient mana wanted to move so with the simple command it continued on its own. She couldn’t completely let it go or it would start to unravel and collapse but she could do other things as long as she remained mindful. Time flew by as she checked on it intermittently.
Knock, knock, knock.
Tanisha and Bjorn turned to the open tailgate of her wagon and saw Robert and Joha.
“We found him.” Alfred stated.
The spinning ambient mana immediately collapsed as Tanisha’s joy fell away.
“Sabec?” Tanisha asked.
“Yes, he is in a small shack on the outskirts of town.” Alfred said. “The Jackrabbits can’t do more than take you and Joha to him. I was told that he was hold up inside all day. Reports say that he was following you around up until yesterday but he hasn’t left the shack at all today.”
Tanisha pressed her hand against the infusion basin and the liquid and power drained. She didn’t check on the status of the ingot itself. Instead she jumped out of the wagon Bjorn right behind her.
“Take me to him.” Tanisha demanded.
“I am. We will also be leaving several Jackrabbits here to watch your wagons.” Robert said. “While we can’t help you with whatever you are going to do with this gnoll man we can make sure that your stuff is secure. I also have a team guarding the basement with the captives.”
“Thank you, Alfred.” Tanisha said with slightly less edge in her voice. “Really, thanks.”