1st of August, 1995. It is a warm, pleasant Tuesday. A lot of people are still in vacation, while others are on their way back home from their holidays. Birds are recreating a blissful atmosphere, singing their delightful sounds. To put it short, everything is perfect. Or so it seems?
As time passes by, we find outserlves at 7 pm in the evening. The local hospital in the county of Crunchy Nugget, is going to host its 666th birth. A worried man is waiting in the hallway of the hospital for this wife to get out of the operation block. He recieved news that during the labor, his wife encountered some problems and the intervention would take longer than expected. Thoughts were floating in his mind, thinking about the worst case scenarios and hoping that everything would go on just fine. Two hours pass by, and the door opens. A doctor makes way towards our man, grabbing his hand and congratulating him. He is the proud father of a healthy boy.
Lets meet the parents, the Green family. Mr. Cucumber, an evil, grumpy father, always disappointed by others and never wrong, and Mrs. Cabbage, a hot, sexy and always horny mother that most of the time has an orgasm, just by talking to her. The newest addition to the family is Lemon, a ginger boy with blue eyes. The strangest family in their region.
Time passes by, and little Lemon starts talking. Besides his usually blabbing, today is the day he will spit out his first words. His parents gathered around him, waiting for the big moment. His father grabbed a camera and started filming. Lemon starts blabbing and finally, the first word comes out. “pe-ee-niss” comes out of the poor boy's mouth. His father gets very angry and his eyes rapidly turn to the woman he married for 7 years:
“I told you to stop acting like a horny slut near the baby...Daaaamn it!!! Our baby's first word is a fucking penis!”, he yelled.
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“Calm down, sweetheart. We can go have some sex after he falls asleep so you can forget this and maybe tomorrow we will have more luck”, she replied. “Maybe he will say something else”, she completed, as they went to the bedroom.
The next day came, and so with it another chance to hear other words coming out of the baby's mouth. They get down of their bed, do their morning routine, and go to grab the baby. Mr. Cucumber grabs the camera again, hoping for a different outcome. As he films, little Lemon starts blabbing again, and after a couple of minutes without saying something, Mr. Cucumber grabs the doll Lemon was playing with, and the baby starts talking. “Slut...gi-vee pi-nees, fa-ak!”. The parents realised that their sexual activities near the child, and the way they talked to eachother during intercourse, mainly screaming and yelling like she fell from the roof, right on his dick, would get imprinted into his brain. All that is left to do now, is try and change that by talking like normal parents.
Days pass by. The baby starts swearing more and more. The parents are unsure what to do. Their efforts to make him learn other words are in vain.
One day, when they came into his room, he was staring at the wall. They looked closely, and didn't notice anything there, and thought that maybe he has seen an insect or something. When they approach to grab him, he points his finger at the wall, and says “haa-aairy dii-iick”. His father felt so embarased, while his mother giggled. "Why are you laughing, woman? Our child is only using vulgar words, yet you amuze yourself. Be more responsible, as this is all thanks to you and your big mouth!"
“You know what else I can do with this big mouth? I can lick that hairy dick, our boy is talking about.”, she replies, with saliva dripping down her lips.
“Why did I marry you, Cabbage? Can't you be a normal mother for this child?”, he asked with tears falling down his cheecks.
Mrs. Cabbage had a moment of realisation, and decided to change her life from then on. She pledged to never use any offensive words near Lemon, ever again. As they went to the living room, she hits her toe in the sofa’s leg and screams from the top of her lungs “Bloody cocksucking, motherfucking sofa! I told you to move this piece of crap from here. You just keep it here so we can fuck eachother facing the TV. FUUCK!!”
During all this time, Lemon was staring at the same spot at that wall, pointing his finger at it. No one seemed to be concerned about this, but truth is yet to be uncovered.