CHAPTER 2 – A BREATH AND MEMORY
Darkness traversed to flickering after images on backs of lids, old television white static drifting to cut out then black before opening credits.
My world skipped from dimmed non existence to breath exhaling and earthy aromas drifting in strong breeze, splaying mist sliding hellos from sky to skin.
Eyes opened and I found myself on an overlook getting sprayed by a small waterfall ten feet to my left, and twice that above, pouring into a large pond about thirty feet below. I took a look around and to my right saw Doze, Ruri and Mase all with eyes swallowing our new birth. A stony path led past them in a slow decline spiraling down to the pond and mossy bank.
I let my gaze drink in the beauty of the view, the kaleidoscope playing off waterfall creating prismatic funnels from the bright sun above, cascading into the rippling pond and the endless forest that lifted from it’s edge trailing off in all directions around the cool liquid. It was wondrous and I knew my Momma would of loved every second of it.
Tears welled up in my eyes, limbs trembling, Doze shaking from our connection and his own scarred emotions of the Grandma he would never see again, came, leaning into me. My hand naturally lifted to rest on his head, his bountiful love driving into the emptiness digging pitfalls in gouged cracks and his own welled up heart sifting memory of our matriarch, our font of spirit that would forever be silent, and it was enough, it was simply enough.
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My Brother joined us, his own eyes spitting reflective sorrow in repose. He put one hand on Dozer then the other seeking, tentative, unsure, faulty in it’s conviction, a decade of trenches long built and longer hidden within but then moving to find anchor, my shoulder, his Brother, and a deep shaking shudder in his chest. His sad gaze found mine. “She will always be with us Dom, always, and with you and Doze, and all of this, I’ve, I’m figuring out how to deal with it. I will, I will deal with it, better, better then with Pops. I, I refuse to hide anymore, to cower when my family needs me.”
That was a mountain for my Brother to push out, and the pride, pride was too small a word, the endless well of love and warmth I felt in his growth, his coming to terms with his deep burrowed empty, his forever haunting, and psychosis that was always a step away from falling, lifted me, invigorated me in a way that was needed in this breath, this moment, this remembrance of what we lost to get here, who we lost.
My gaze found Ruri by herself, holding her arms as if to keep the loneliness and her own monumental loss away from our moment of memory and tribute. I called to her, reached for her with my heart, spirit and empathy. “Ruri” Her eyes lifted to mine and for once saw the real me, not the one oggling tits, but the real Dom, the one who had a leonine heart as my Momma would say, smile, and would never leave his family to face hardships alone and uncared for. “Come here, we weren’t the only ones who lost someone.” She hesitated but then Mase, his own face shadowed with dirt strewn tears beckoned, then Dozer, the ever glue to all things with affection in their lining, ambled over, strutted behind her and butted her in the ass which stumbled her a couple steps forward, that beautiful melodic laugh echoing off stone.
Her arms joined our own as we leaned, heads together and Dozer shoved his way between us, a circle of remembrance, a coven of family and familial heart strings and an ode to forever love and loyalty.