He rushed out of the city and found a spot by a pleasant willow tree that was only about fifty metres away from the gently swaying shoreline. It had been hours since he’d last gone to the bathroom, and he’d been drinking steadily all the while. He wobbled on his feet, feeling the full force of his drunkenness.
Looks like it’s time for some good old Divine Spirit Fountain water.
He embraced a calm and refreshing breeze, staring out at the distant waters which were covered in a curtain of glistening moonlight. All things considered, it had to be one of the most relaxing pees of his life. Before he could finish, however, he reached up to scratch at an annoying itch on his left cheek, at which point he stiffened in complete shock at some unexpected contact.
“Here, let me hold it for you.”
His drunken response was to stand there with wide eyes and finish off with what had suddenly become the most bizarre pee of his life, as Avril looked over his shoulder with interest.
“So, do I shake it, or—”
He jumped backwards, his mind reeling. He should have let Ian come along with him.
“Whoa, what the fuck is wrong with you?” He rushed to make himself decent, and then snapped at her, his face heating. “Did you seriously just creep up on me and do that?”
“Now we’re even.”
“What are you talking about? How would you feel if I followed you into the woods while you were doing the same thing, and I—I don’t know, held up your leg or something? There’d be parades for justice!”
“I don’t know what you’re on about, but you need to relax. I just came to thank you for earlier.”
“Well, that’s not how you do it. What the hell is wrong with you?”
Her eyes drifted downward. “It doesn’t look like you mind, though?”
He wanted to cry. Go back to sleep, my son!
He gave his head a shake. “It is what it is. Listen, from now on you don’t talk to me, you don’t look at me, and you don’t seek me out, and you sure as hell don’t grab my dick. I don’t need some creepy molester bothering me at every turn.” He turned to leave. “I’m serious. I don’t care that you’re a girl, I’ll still break your legs.”
“What does me being a girl have to do with it?”
“I’m glad you understand.”
He dashed away, but was cut off by Avril’s abrupt reappearance.
“Wait. Here.” She threw a spatial bag at Nolan. “You and your friends wanted these, right?”
He inspected the contents of the spatial bag with his spiritual sense. Amberwood ale? There were thirty-nine barrels inside, all of them unopened. Why would she give these to him? Had she gathered them all just for this purpose? No, that couldn’t be it. She had already been collecting the ale before he had unwittingly stepped in to help her, which happened to be the cause of the conflict between him and the old man he’d killed.
“I mean, I’ll accept them, but why would you just hand these over to me? Didn’t you spend all day collecting them?”
Stolen from its rightful place, this narrative is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.
“I saw that your handsome friend had an eye for this ale, so I planned on gifting these to him.”
How committed was she to pestering Ian, when each of these barrels was priced at a hundred spirit stones?
“What, love at first sight or something?”
She scoffed. “More like, I need a partner for cultivation once I enter the sect.”
He didn’t understand what she meant, but he didn’t really care.
“Alright, well…” He stowed the spatial bag away. “Since you’ve given me some alcohol, I guess I’ll forgive you for almost getting me killed for no reason and forcing me to murder that old man.”
“When you say it like that, it makes me think you’re still mad?”
He turned around with a sigh. “This fucking world,” he muttered, ignoring Avril as he walked back in the direction of Elmer.
“Hold on.”
Avril appeared in front of him and shook a wooden cup in his face. Looking closely, this was one of the cups that the two children from the earlier incident had kept in their wooden crate. When Nolan raised an eyebrow, she scoffed.
“You can’t just accept all of that ale and not share some with me. It was expensive!”
Nolan almost returned the spatial bag that she had just given him, but thought better of it. “Stop being so thirsty. I already told you, I’m not interested.”
“But I am thirsty?” she said, confused. “I promise I won’t grab you again. Well, not unless you ask me to.”
He tried to push past her, but she got in his way again. “Please, I just want to talk.”
A pleasant breeze rolled past, ruffling the seaside grasses that encroached upon the white sand of the moonlit beach, which seemed to glow beneath the gentle ambience. It was during a breeze like this that Avril had hijacked the best piss of his life and turned it into an episode of crime stoppers.
“One drink,” he said, slightly wary despite the lack of hostility that she displayed.
She sat down once he’d filled her mug to the brim with the renowned brew. He also poured himself a helping in an ordinary silver cup that he had stowed away in the secondary spatial bag that contained his reserves of food and drink, along with dozens of plates, containers, and miscellaneous silverware.
“Cheers,” he said apathetically. He stared down at the clear, amber liquid, which wasn’t bubbling up as much as ordinary brews. Time to see what the big deal is.
He took a long, satisfying sip. How did the drink stay so cold if it wasn’t refrigerated in any way? He focused his spiritual sense on the barrel, but didn’t notice anything out of the ordinary about the container. As for the ale, it contained a slight trace of spiritual energy.
“Ah,” said Avril, a smile on her heart-shaped face. “It never fails to hit the spot!”
“You’ve had it before?” Nolan felt a bit queasy for a few moments, but the episode quickly passed.
“Plenty of times. This stuff is my favourite. Wait a few moments and you’ll see what I mean.”
Nolan took another sip and enjoyed the unique taste, which was moderately heavy with a hint of honey. Wow, this is like the evolved form of Molson.
“Hey.” He kept his gaze on the gently rolling waves that washed against the nearby shore. “I’m gonna be brunt. Why are you so unrelenting? If I didn’t help you out, you’d have just given this stuff to Ian, anyhow.”
She patted the ground at her side, though Nolan ignored the invitation and remained on his feet. She gave an offended huff, which made him laugh.
After a few moments of silence, she said, “Your friend’s very strong for his age. He’ll probably reach the Genesis stage before he turns thirty. Is it so strange for me to be interested in him?”
“That’s all it takes, huh?” He took another sip of ale, his legs suddenly unsteady. “Ho, shit. I’m… How did I get so fucked up so fast? Oh my god.”
Avril laughed as he tried to get his bearings, to the point that her eyes became wet at the corners. “What did I tell you?”
“Honestly, just wow.” He blinked a few times and then lowered his cup. Not only was he drunk, but his spiritual energy was invigorated, his spiritual space showing the slightest signs of growth.
“Amberwood ale affects everybody the same, no matter who drinks it.”
Not wanting to be so muddle-headed in her company, Nolan took out some Divine Spirit Fountain water and helped himself to a few gulps, which lowered his drunkenness down to a comfortable buzz.
“What was that water?”
“Nothing you need to worry about.”
“Greedy…”
He inwardly cursed at himself for casually taking out the water and displaying its effects for Avril to see, but he’d been so drunk that such thoughts had been the furthest from the fore of his mind.
“Listen,” he said, feeling a bit refreshed. “I’m not interested in you like that, and I don’t think Ian is either. You’ll have to find someone else to be your husband.”