Upon making it inside John is very much relieved being greeted by the same boring reception with its admittedly rather stylish furniture and crowd pleasing fish tanks.
These fish seemed to help a tremendous amount as most people walking in for the first time tended to get the impression that this was a serious and proper business, which it of course was. That said John’s composure did not last long having spotted the cute desk girl, and being the straightforward and outspoken man he was he blurted out.
"You're blue!”
“No really?" she said in a tone heavily laced with sarcasm. “You know what
on further inspection that does in fact appear to be the case. I am shocked and astounded, I mean how could I not have seen it, I mean, I must have been blue all this time.” A large and slightly mischievous smile was now displayed on her face.
“Okay, you don’t have to be dick about it.” Said John.
“Well considering hundreds of years of enslavement, oppression and perhaps even more importantly, my boring ass desk job I kind of had to retort with something.” She said blowing some pink bubblegum, now wearing a bored expression.
As John sincerely had no idea on how to respond to this statement he instead opted for the tactical retreat, continuing onwards to his workspace without responding to the receptionist. Greeting som more normal looking colleagues*. He eventually found his way to his desk. Sitting down John got to work solving some programming issues that his boss had assigned him.
* The coffee machine among others.
Things continued on in this way for some time until around lunch when people predictably got up and started to leave presumably on a quest for nutrients. Feeling more than ready for some nutrients himself, preferably in the form of a hamburger, John was going up to ask one of his coworkers for company, when he noticed something strange but also quite familiar: the sky was blue not black something that for a brief moment caused immense relief. Only for that sense to be turned completely upside down when he realized that, unlike before, there was no visible light streaming in from the windows. Feeling a strong urge to investigate, John rushed outside through the quickest exit available, a fire escape that led to an alley outside.
Well outside he was greeted by the eerie black light of the moon at, according to his watch, 12:30 in the afternoon. John was concerned. Walking down the pitch blue alley John began the mentally arduous exercise of rationalizing his existence.
“I bet it's those mushrooms I tried in college coming back to bite me now, I mean others must think I'm so silly not even knowing that the sun sets before 12 o'clock.” As he was, in what had now become a regular exercise, questioning his sanity a deep and dark almost robotic voice resonated through the alley.
“Hello there interloper” A bag was then thrown in his direction from where the voice originated. “Now if you would kindly place your head in the provided bag this will be a lot easier for everyone involved.”
“What?”Said John, clearly failing to comprehend the situation. “What do you mean put my head in the bag? There must be some kind of mista-”
“There is no mistake, our master has ordered it. His exact wording was: I want the interloper's head delivered in a bag, and make it quick! So now if you would kindly put your head in the bag and come with us. I promise there will be no need for violence.
Justifying a tad of baldness on a supposed 10 year long mushroom high John blurted out.
“ What us!” to which the response he got was.
“This us.” But now it was not only one voice speaking but many and they
seemed to come from all directions, and they were getting closer. A moment started, a moment was and then a moment passed. Then he saw it, he was surrounded and not only that but his assailants were not of your typical human persuasion. They all looked remarkably similar to one another with the most noticeable traits being a mechanical red left eye and wings of metal sticking out their back. John was scared in fact he was more than scared. Positively terrified, more scared than when he had to speak at a conference in front of 500 people, more scared than when he went bungee jumping in college and definitely more scared than when he was robbed by an old drunk man on his vacation in Baja. Thus John did the only thing that did not seam suicidal at the time he stuck his head in the provided bag and hoped that what he could see would not hurt him.
“I see you have chosen wisely.” The original entity said.
John was then grasped from both sides and then dragged for a small distance, tied up and gagged before being placed in the baggage of a larger
vehicle. As the engine ignited and the vehicle rolled away John was having a, less than mild, panic attack he started to think about the situation he was in, which as far as his sanity was concerned was a big mistake.
Unauthorized usage: this narrative is on Amazon without the author's consent. Report any sightings.
“They're not really gonna behead me right? The bringing of heads in bags is
surely just scare tactics right? I mean that is such an old fashioned concept anyhow am sure the mob have more sophisticated means nowadays. I bet these bird, human, robot people are really just big softies, it’s like your parents always told you, you should never judge a book by its cover. Right?”
As John’s brain was doing the thing it does best, that being; writing a report for itself that is just slightly more optimistic than what was handed to him by the optical department. He was however unable to quite finish, interrupted by a sudden crash followed by what sounded like several skulls being opened by less than precise means. All the while John's body was tumbling around, what he now positively knew as, the back of a van not having been secured to anything. Then there was silence, well not really you could still hear the traffic and steady hum of the engine. But it might as well have been silence as for in that particular moment there was considerably less sound than before.
Unable to do much of anything John continued his doctrine of practical ignorance of danger. He tried to sit as still as he possibly could. After a while there was music coming from the front of the vehicle, music accompanied by truly horrendous singing(the song in question sounded very childish). The voice was of the female persuasion and much like the music sounded rather childish, kind and honest but not naive, never naive.
Then suddenly the music stopped playing and what sounded like a news story rolled: “In the recent news; yet another high speed car robbery has taken place in the early morning at 12:51 as of yet neither the robber or robbed have been apprehended as both parties quickly left the scene after the clash. The authorities are currently investigating the event as a clash between rivaling pirate crews. If you at some point spot any of the following car/motorcycle plates please contact the authorities: Robocop, CyborgLover69, 10011100011010101“
For a brief moment John thought:
“I'm going to be saved, the van will be stopped by the police and when they find me i'll be free” John however was very much wrong as just in time for the end of the news segment the van slowed down then stopped. You could hear the ignition being switched off, then the shutting of the doors, Then he heard her voice again. “Now let’s see what kind of advanced technology the cyborgs bastards have so graciously given me today.” And just like that the back doors of the van where thrown open and John laid eyes upon his kidnaper what he saw was quite unique, it was a woman in her early to mid twenties, with curly blue hair, sparkling blue eyes as well as a few benign freckles on her cheeks, She wore brown cargo shorts, kept up by suspenders, and a white t-shirt. Around her neck hung a pair of goggles that had a golden outline and green glass. Bringing the whole mechanic look together was the multitude of oil stains scattered over her entire being. At this John thought;
“Well it’s certainly better than cyborgs.”
“Ohh what is this? Some kind of autonomous human looking android” Saying that she abruptly started to run her hands over John touching his face and arms, which caused John to wiggle and squirm.
“Wow this feels very real, it has proper reactions and everything, I wonder if you can speak?”
Uttering the, to what John felt to be, magic words. She removed the gag in his mouth granting John access to his self-proclaimed gift of gab. Confused to a degree he’d never experienced before and suffering from more than a little bit of Stockholm syndrome John decided to open with the ever trusty line:
“Hey… How you doin’?”
“well it unfortunately does not seem to have much in the way of intelligence, still impressive though“
As John was sitting on the floor feeling hurt the woman swept her wrench looking object across his face and then suddenly the woman jumped back now pointing her wrench at John in a threatening manner.
“So you’re not an android, just flesh and bones huh. So what's your deal? Do you know something? Maybe how to make nuclear warheads or something like that? Or, can you do something? Super strength? Superspead? x-ray vision?” The last of which was said hesitantly and in a shy almost disgusted demeanor.
That was the last straw for our hero. John, only really knowing how little he knew, and he was unsure in that regard as well, suddenly came to accept reality, the sky was not black during a sunny day, it was blue! And there is no such thing as speed limit free roads in the UK! and-
“This is not my world” John suddenly said out loud “everything is strange and different and wrong!”
“woh there pretentious much.” The woman said.
“You don’t get it! There is no such thing as blue people! Or blue hair for that matter! I must be completely insane and don’t even get me started on cyborgs, something which I, as an avid tech fan, can confirm does not yet exist.”
“Dude. Slow down I get it, one minute you’re having a Sunday drive, next minute you’re on a road with no speed limits and you don’t quite know what's going on.”
“Wait! really? How do you know that?” John said, quite taken aback.
“Whilst far from common the occasional interloper slips through the space time continuum and ends up here in the land of dreams. I mean you didn’t think you were special right? The hero of some kind of story.” The last part was uttered with a cruel smirk on her lips. Her mode seaming to take a turn stretched out her hand in what looked like a mixture of a greeting and an attempt to help him get up
“Well anyway you seem harmless enough. What’s your name Mr interloper?”
“Doe, John Doe, pleasure to make your acquaintance Mis?"
“Flora, just Flora.” She said, sounding slightly sad but only for a moment.
Thus as the sun rose and the sin dwindled John felt for once happy with his life for approximately five seconds”
“Am sure it will be a pleasure having known you.” Flora said with a large genuine smile on her face.”
“You mean knowing right?” John said, sounding a bit unsure of himself.
“I wouldn’t get my hopes up, you see interlopers have a tendency of dying or totally losing it within the week, and that's for the mentally stable ones.”