“Everyone ready?” Dale asked, a wide grin plastered on his face.

“Why are you so excited?” Steve asked him.

Dale shrugged. “I’m a geek. I’ve been playing tabletop games and online games my entire adult life. My first real dungeon crawl as a mage? Seriously? I’m bouncing off the walls here.”

Mary offered a confused smile. Anna just stared at the trailer in wonder. “It looks so pretty with mag sight!” Anna exclaimed.

“Mag sight?” Dale asked. “You mean mage sight?”

She just nodded and continued to stare.

Dale really wanted to strangle the imp casually floating around his head. There was such a thing as mage sight and this little asshole hadn’t even mentioned it.

All of the kobolds were now armed. They’d torn apart a couple cars for various tools that they were now using as weapons. They looked like a gang of Mad Max inspired lizard people. One even carried a stick with a radiator fan blade wired on it. Electrical tape, duct tape, and torn out wires made up their armor of plastic panels.

Dale and Ichnick had taken out large plastic barriers, heated them, and then reshaped them into something that resembled armor. Both had even received the skill armor smith out of it.

You are at the entrance to the Icey Halls Dungeon. Do you wish to proceed, Y/n?

Dale selected yes and a swirling portal of energy appeared before them. They walked forward until everyone was inside. The portal closed and an eerie purple glow emanated from the walls. It looked like the back of any trailer Dale had ever walked in. Except this one had boxes and tubs of Good Humor ice cream and ice cream products.

The corrugated metal walls began to spread away from each other as the group proceeded forward. Upon closer inspection, the purple glow was coming from some sort of fungus that also felt cold to the touch. No wonder the ice cream still looked frozen.

Corrugated metal gave way to jagged ice. The fungus continued to grow on the ice in patches that spiraled out from central mounds of purple fuzz.

Dale’s eyes widened. “Ichnick, you have alchemy in your world, right?”

Ichnick stared at him in confusion.

“Mixing different compounds together to make magical elixirs.” Dale tried to explain.

Ichnick simply stared at him.

Anna piped up with, “My familiar says that is part of my education later.”

Dale smiled at Anna. “Thank you.” He shot a dirty look at the imp who flipped him off. Dale sighed and shook his head. Then he reached into his backpack and grabbed a box of plastic bags. It only took a few seconds to scrape chunks of glowing purple fungus into a bag.

You could be reading stolen content. Head to the original site for the genuine story.

They moved forward, gathered together partly against the cold and partly against whatever might be waiting for them around the next bend. The ice was jagged and sharp enough to cut. One of the kobolds accidently bumped the wall and took away a gash for his trouble.

The ground was now solid stone. The temperature wasn’t low enough to freeze the droplets gathering at their feet. Those droplets did leave their footing precarious at times.

Squelching, slurping, and weird sounds like scraping came from up ahead. Dale peeked around the corner. Slimes nearly covered the floor. Remembering from every game ever, you didn’t see slimes or oozes unless they were moving. These were multiple colors and types and were nearly on top of each other.

Dale looked at Steve and Mary. “We’re gonna need your daughter.”

They both stared at him for a second before Steven vehemently shook his head. Mary just froze.

Dale backed them away from the infested hallway. He didn’t have long to convince them. It was either press forward or leave the dungeon.

“Fire and heat aren’t going to work with these things I don’t think.” Dale explained.

“You don’t think, but do you know?” Steven asked.

Ichnick peeked around the corner and backed up with frightened eyes.

“Ichnick, will fire work against those things?” Dale asked in a low voice.

Ichnick was shaking his head. “Fire won’t work.” The little kobold explained in an even lighter voice than Dale had used. “We must flee, oozes and slimes hunt kobolds for food!” He explained.

Xilbit was now backing the kobolds down the hall back the way they’d come. It looked like they truly were natural enemies.

Dale watched as his fighting force crept back down the tunnels until they were out of sight. He reached into his cart and pulled out a wooden baseball bat.

Dale came around the corner and a quick walk. He slammed the bat down on the first ooze he saw. Another was crawling on the wall next to him. Dale swung as hard as he could, smashing into the slime and the jagged ice walls. He stepped forward, bringing his bat down in an overhead swing that smacked into something black and viscous.

A part of it snaked out and hit Dale in the shin. Pain lanced up his leg and he hopped back. The thing reached out with another tendril.

Dale was ready and swung hard to connect with the morphed appendage. He followed the strike through, circled the bat around, and then brought it straight down atop the black thing. The monster recoiled. A couple drops of sludge hit Dale’s cheek.

It started to burn!

Dale quickly tried to wipe it away. His hand and his face was now burning. He ran back down the hallway, grabbed his cart, and continued running until he met up with the group by the exit.

Anna was eating a strawberry ice cream bar. She grinned when she saw him. “It’s still good!”

“We gotta go.” Dale told them.

Anna was especially crestfallen but still happily ate her ice cream bar while they exited through the portal.

Dale sat with the bat at the ready for a moment to see if any oozes or slimes would get out. In some of the books he’d read, dungeons overflowed into the surrounding area at times. After what felt like five minutes, he finally relaxed. His skin still burned but it didn’t take but a moment to get healed up by Steven. After which, everyone stared at him.

“Why would you do something that insane?” Mary asked him, looking at the holes burnt into his clothing and the red marks on his newly healed skin. “Everyone was evacuating.”

Dale sighed and shrugged. “My first real dungeon. I didn’t want to run. I wanted to win! Find out what waited at the end. You know, adventure.” Dale looked down at himself, all two hundred sixty pounds of round belly and flabbiness.

Ichnick walked over and put a claw gently on his arm. “You will have more chances. For now, we need you. Don’t you need to get to your children?”

Dale nodded. “Yeah, but she called so at least I know they are all together and so far okay. You’re right, it was a foolish risk. Trying to recapture my youth I guess.” He shrugged.

Xilbit patted his other arm. “You are fellow chief. Much time to go get self killed. For now, tribe need you.” Xilbit was so vulnerably unaware of what he was saying that Dale could only chuckle and nod in understanding. “Trust kobolds, we help get self killed once tribe together.”

Ichnick and Dale shared a grin. Soon enough, the group was headed north. No sign of slimes or oozes coming out of the dungeon.