I died.
But then again, dead men tell no tales. That doesn’t change the fact that I’m still being very talkative inside my head.
My death wasn’t a dream, that’s for sure. It was painful and felt very real. But if I am indeed a dead man, I won’t be able to think about my death like this.
Maybe Hell or Heaven exists? But I saw no old man in white robe or any big red devil. If they don’t, then this is what people called the oblivion after death?
Must be funny to continue existing when your soul is in oblivion.
That’s it. I gave up. I have no idea what state I currently am. It’s not like the answer will come by itself.
At least for now.
After sometime, the answer would suddenly become clear to me.
“Uhgoaaaa!”
I was reborn.
I only realized what happened when my eyes saw the light of this new world. I felt my arms and legs, but they are as tiny as a log. After some looks, I finally found out that I am currently an infant.
Whatever happens, there’s no way a truck would have the ability to turn people into babies. And if it did, I would instantly recognize the scenery around. That wasn’t the case here. This place seems very unfamiliar, even though there’s still a blue sky and a yellow sun up above.
With those informations, I officially declare that I just experienced reincarnation.
The reason I am not aware of this before is because of my own infant baby’s awareness, which hasn’t mature enough until now. In other terms, it would be the ego, if you prefer Freudian psychology, or consciousness if we’re using layman term.
“Jeezz. Not again. What a troublesome child you are, Zero.”
A voice came. Through my new eyes, I saw a beautiful dark-green and long haired woman wearing casual clothes along an apron walking toward me, with wet towel in one hand and…a diaper in the other. After picking me up with her left hand, the woman used the other to cover her nose with the towel as she shakes her head in despair.
I take a look back at my cradle and instantly knows what just happened.
It seems I just shit myself, literally.
“Urghh…I swear not even Ein’s is this smelly...”
“Ghehe…”
My sarcastically smile sounds just as rubbish as the words coming out from the woman’s mouth, which I presume (for now) is my mother of “this world”.
“Don’t give me that look, young man! You are the one guilty here!”
My beautiful mom seems angry. Understandbly, I just shit myself and my mom has to clean after my mess. I feel pretty bad myself, although it’s not like I can help it. Even with a young-adult conscience inside a baby’s body, I haven’t got used to it long enough to control my bladder. I doubt that I could stand and walk with my current body. With a quick glance, I think this child (a.k.a the current me) is months old at best.
“Let’s put that mess aside for sec…Time for you to take a bath.”
The woman takes me away to somewhere akin to a bathroom. She whips out a bathing bowl, throws away my dirtied diaper, calmly washes the remaining mess on my ass with some water then finally puts me on the wooden bowl, after which she filled it with lukewarm water before going for a full body wash.
“And clean as new…for now...”
After the bath, the woman dried me with her clean towel then changes my diaper. Afterward, she takes me to the house’s living room and puts me on a nearby sofa full of comfy pillows before going back to take care of the mess at my cradle.
“Ugoa”
My mouth blabbered as I tried to says something in my native language. I moved my hands and legs until it becomes futile as I realize I’m unable to walk for the time being. It would seem my infant body still can’t cope with my current mental state. There’s nothing much I can do by myself at this moment beside acting like a true baby.
It’s not that bad, actually, the feeling of being a baby. You can make a mess out of yourself, crying out loud, annoy others, and people would still forgive you for what you did because you’re a baby. Even though completely dependant on others and troublesome most of the times, babies are still one of the most loved things in the world. Miracle of life, or so they said.
But that’s not what weighting my mind right now. Sure, being a a baby is good and all, and I’m not complaining when I have another chance to live. But…
Why me?
I didn’t live a fulfilling nor helpful life. I mostly cared about my welfare at the foremost rather than others (but that’s normal, right?). That being said, it’s not like I enjoy seeing people suffer enough to warrant an eternal suffering in the next life. My death is exetremely anti-climatic. It was a trivial death, without doing anything noteworthy like saving someone else before I die. I died and that’s it. Nothing special.
Which prompts the question: Why? Why me of all people?
Hell, I didn’t even believe there is an afterlife, or something like the Buddism’s karma. Me being here is as random as my own death. There isn’t any god-like entity shows up to greet me before I reincarnated. Just one BAM, and I’m here as a baby. It’s extremely weird.
“…”
There is this one friend of mine in my college class. He once introduced some ridiculous terms he found on the wikipedia as he tried to sounds smart to impress the first year girls. “Anything can happen, will happen” – said the guy, or something akin to that. I’m not the guy with the best memory in the world, I know.
I wonder if me being here is a part of that phase, just because it can happen and so it will happen. Nothing can stop it, as long as it is able to.
“Ugu.”
I guess…it’s no use thinking about things you can’t comprehend. Whatever happened, happened. I am here, living a new life bestowed to me because it can happen. I don’t need to think too hard about it, just live it the way I want to. Let’s keep it simple.
If I can’t make it better, I won’t make it worse.
Suddenly, some footsteps disrupted my train of thought. From the interior of the house, a tall man wearing a gray robe walks out. He has light gray hair and eyes. He’s a bit young, not much older than my mom. He’s holding some old tomes in his hand. His attention at first is on his path, but when he becomes aware of the baby on the sofa, he averts his gaze to my side. A stare that has neither love nor affection. It’s not even a stare of hate or something of the likes. It’s just…an expression of disappointment. Something people made when they want nothing to do with someone else.
A stare which I knew too well from my old parents.
What’s the deal of this man?
“Dad, dad! The doctor is here!”
Someone shouted. From outside, a young kid came running. His handsome face is full of excitement. He has short dark green hair and a pair of golden eyes. By his expression when he approachs the tall young man, I would say the man is the kid’s father…and maybe by extension, my own father in this world.
“Please lead him here, Ein. I will go back to the study room. If anything happens, tell your mom.”
The man coldly spoke to his child, which leaves the kid in a bit shock as he watches his father leaves.
“Dad…”
When the father is out of sight, the kid suddenly approaches me and lifts me off the sofa.
“Well, no matter what happen, I would still love you, lil bro!”
I may not understand his words, but his body language is genuine. It tells no lies, and it tells me that this kid loves me very much. If he is indeed my older brother, then this relationship has become miles better than the one I had with my own brother back in the old world.
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“Eghehe.”
I smiled. Of course, my words are as incomprehensive to both me and the kid, but he didn’t mind. The kid smiled and tried to hug me. Of course, my mother stopped that when she comes into the room with an old man behind her. You must handle a baby with care, you know!?
“I’m sorry I wasn’t here when your child was born, madam. The flu season is coming and it’s getting worse this year, so I have to visit the nearby village to give vaccines for the children.”
Said the old man. He’s carrying a red suitcase. His attire is that of a traveler, but it still has some classes that separates him for a common peasant of a fantasy world.
“It’s alright, doctor. I know how rare doctors are in other villages, so I won’t mind. As long as you are here then all is fine.”
My mom answered.
“Well then, madam. I would like to begin my work.”
Said the old man.
“If you excuse me, child. Can you put the baby back to the sofa, kid?”
“Yes, doctor!”
My brother gleefully responsed. He suddenly puts me back to the sofa I previously lay on. My mom brings a wooden chair from nearby to let the old man sit. The old man then puts his suitcase on his lap as he takes out the items inside, with one of them resembling a stethoscope. With those informations, I presume the old man is a doctor, invited here to check up on my health.
“Well hello. Nice to meet you. I am here to make sure you are healthy, little one!”
Suddenly, the old man spoke to me with a friendly tone when he catched my gaze. Of course, I can’t just says “Nice to meet you too” out loud with my baby tongue. My reactions are just random rubbishs an infant child would make, but the old man kindly accepted those reactions.
“He isn’t afraid of strangers. That makes things easier! Usually children his age are very aware of their surrounding, especially around people they never met before.”
“Thank you doctor.”
My mom answered. She doesn’t seem very high-spirited. Well I would too, if you take a look at the mess I made earlier.
“May I ask what is the name of this child?”
My mom fell silent for a bit before reluctantly answers the doctor.
“It’s…Zero.”
“Zero? That’s a…rather weird name for a child.”
The doctor turned his gaze to my mother in surprise.
“It is indeed. But my husband has decided.”
“I see…Then I won’t pry any further.”
The old doctor turns back to me. Equipped with his stethoscope, he starts checking for my heart beat and pulse for an overall health check. When all is done, he takes out his tools and starts speaking to my mom.
“Your child is very healthy, madam. His immune system is very strong. There are no syptoms of common sicknesses children his age may have. You and your husband have nothing to worry about.”
“I see. Thank you doctor.”
“But just to be sure, I’ll give him a vaccine. After all, better safe than sorry! The flue season is coming!”
“Please do.”
It seems like my check up has ended. I’m a bit dissapointed though. Judging from the aesthetic of this house and the people’s clothing, I’m expecting a more…arcane way of checking health. In case that wasn’t clear, what I’m saying is…「Magic」. I want to see some magic, sorcery, witchcraft…or whatever the people here call it.
“Mom, mom. Why didn’t the doctor use any magic? Like, healing magic?”
Suddenly, my older brother bursts out some words, presumably a question.
“Healing magic can only heal physical wounds, sweetheart.”
My mom answered.
“That’s right, kid. 「Priests」 heal wounds, but 「Doctors」 cure sicknesses. Magic isn’t the answer for everything.”
The doctor searches for something inside his suitcase again. This time, he takes out a sealed small bottle, which seems to be a medicine of sort, along with it is a…clean syringe.
Oh no, not syringes. I hate syringes and shots. They are painful as f*ck!
“Calm down, son. It will only hurt for a bit.”
As I start moving my body in fear of taking a shot, my mom calmly hold me up…all while pointing me toward the doctor’s direction. He stabs the syringe inside the bottle and fills up the syringe with the liquid inside. After he’s done, the doctor looks at me, with the syringe in his hand. Slowly, the doctor aproaches my right arm while my mom is firmly holding it to let the doctor do his job.
“Okay, here we go.”
Said the doctor. Of course I didn’t understand what he’s saying. But whatever it is, it can’t be good!
Shit, shit, shit, shit!!!!
“Hmm? That’s strange.”
Before I can feel the pain though, the syringe stopped…somewhat. I still can feel the cold needle touching my sensitive baby skin, but that’s just the sensation. The syringe itself it didn’t penetrate my flesh, or rather, it can’t, despite the doctor keeps pushing more and more force down the syringe.
“What in the world…?”
Whatever he tried, it all proved to be futile. No matter where the old doctor choose to stick his syringe, the result is still the same: The syringe can’t penetrate my flesh. After some point, the doctor gave up. His face looks like he just saw some sort of evil witchcraft. While my mom and brother’s reaction is better, they still look surprised. Hell, even I am surprised. Baby skin isn’t suppose to be as hard as steel, unless you’re Superman, and my name isn’t Kal-El.
“No…I can’t give up!”
“It’s futile, Doctor. You should not waste your strength.”
Another one joined the little health-checkup. In the house’s interior, the husband of the house walks out, still with some old tomes in his hand. He looks as if expecting something like this would happen.
“Dear…You know about this?”
The man didn’t answer. Or rather, he completely evaded the question by saying something else.
“Your work here is done, Doctor. Your pay will arrive tomorrow at your clinic. For now, you should go and rest. The constant travelling may have tire you, Doctor.”
“But the vaccine…! The flu season is coming, and it’s especially dangerous to children his age!”
Said the doctor.
“You don’t have to worry about him. That child…”
The man suddenly takes a glance at me before resuming his conversation.
“…is different. He will be fine.”
Although not convinced, the man’s words affected the old doctor in someway. He decided it is futile to continue and started packing his stuff with some worries on his face.
“If you say so, Mister Acht. But I won’t give up just yet. I’ll go back and see if there’s any drinkable vaccine I can make.”
The man once gain didn’t answer. Soon, the doctor bid his farewell then left. Only the family members remain.
“Acht, you know of this, don’t you?”
The man keeps silent. His hand touches the tome he’s carrying for a moment.
“Please…answer me.”
Despite her plead, the house husband still turns his back and leaves, which prompt my mom to chase after him in search for an explaination. While the two of them have already gone out of sight, the sounds of their argument can still be heard by me…and the kid that is my older brother.
“Zero…”
Suddenly, the kid tenderly hold my baby hand. Despite witnessing what just happened, the kid’s eyes are just as pure as they were before, with no ounce of hate nor disgust. A look of trust, something I rarely see in people close to me.
“No matter what you are, you’re still my lil bro…Zero.”