Lusya cracked the tent flap open and found Ariya sound asleep within, her shoulders rising and falling with her steady breaths as she lay curled up under her blanket. She would likely stay like that until Lusya roused her in the morning. Ariya was not a light sleeper.

Lusya turned and went back to the fire, where she took a seat. Beldo sat across from her, flipping through a book he had borrowed from her. It looked more like he was skimming it than actually reading, perhaps trying to discern if it was to his tastes before committing.

About halfway through, however, he snapped the book shut and set it aside.

“Is the book not to your liking?” she asked.

“Not quite.” He leaned forward, his eyes boring into Lusya from across the fire. “But that’s not the issue.”

She cocked her head and blinked twice. “I take it you need something from me, then?”

He nodded. “I’ve stayed quiet long enough. Why are you traveling with Ariya?”

“Why do you wish to know?” she asked, blinking once more

He shrugged. “For my peace of mind. Of course, there’s not much I can do about whatever you’re up to. But I’d at least like to know what’s going to happen to that girl. That’s about all I can do. The way I see it, it’s my duty to understand what’s going on around me. I don’t believe in ignorance is bliss.”

Lusya considered for a moment, then nodded. As he said, there was not much he could do as a pacifist. There was little harm in telling him. She stood and checked the tent one more time, just to be safe. Ariya was still sleeping. After returning to the fireside, Lusya began her explanation.

“I am sure you have noticed,” Lusya said, “that Ariya is exceptionally pure of Malice. There is no such thing as a pure mortal, but she has extraordinarily little within her.”

Beldo cocked an eyebrow and was silent for a moment before nodding. “Sure.”

“My father told me that if I sacrificed a pure mortal at the place of his birth, he would be revived,” Lusya said. “Since we both knew a pure mortal did not exist, I inferred he meant someone like Ariya.”

Beldo pursed his lips. “So, that’s what you’re on your way to do.”

“Indeed,” Lusya said. “After careful observation, I concluded Ariya was an ideal candidate and took steps to procure her. I then began the process of escorting her across the continent to Midbud Isle.”

“Out of curiosity,” Beldo said, “where did you start from?”

“The southeast.”

“Why?”

This content has been unlawfully taken from Royal Road; report any instances of this story if found elsewhere.

“Father advised me it would be a good place to find a potential sacrifice, since it was relatively untouched by the war,” she said.

Beldo was silent for a moment. “I see.” He sighed. “Well, that’s terrible. But, like I said, there’s not much I can do to stop you. It’s your decision. But are you sure you want to do it?”

Lusya hesitated, and a slight frown tugged at her lips. “When our journey began, Ariya’s fate did not matter to me. She was merely a prop in the ritual I needed to perform, and my protection of and caring for her were only to ensure she was not damaged.”

“And now?”

She hesitated again. “I find the fact that I must kill her unfortunate. I would rather it was not so, and I am sure it will hurt me to do it. But I will. I must revive Father. I want to.”

“That much, I can’t blame you for,” Beldo said. “People will talk about the sanctity of life and death and how they wouldn’t do it even if they could, but I doubt there’s anyone who hasn’t, even for a moment, wished they could see someone they’d lost again.”

Lusya did not say anything. She knew from various writings—fictional and otherwise—and people she had known that it was a common sentiment, but she had nothing to add on the subject. She hadn’t often made a point of exploring other people’s grief. Only her own.

“But I’ll ask again: are you sure?” Beldo repeated. “That girl adores you, and it’s obvious you care for her. Are you sure you want to give that up?”

Lusya nodded. “I will revive Father. And while I am sure it will hurt, I will manage. Compartmentalizing my emotions is a strength of mine. That is why I have remained committed to my mission this long.”

The idea of abandoning it had occurred to her. She could settle down with Ariya somewhere and live in peace. But she had rejected that idea and banished it behind the wall. She needed to revive Father.

“Part of me does want to give it up and spare her,” Lusya said. “Perhaps even most of me. But I have separated that sentiment from my intentions. That may not be the best thing to do, and I may only be so at ease with the idea of killing her because of my demonic half. But it is in my nature, and it seems I cannot rebel against that as you do.”

Beldo smiled softly. “You don’t have to do it like I do. We can have a debate about whether I’m still doing it or if who I am has changed, but, a long time ago, I decided to completely reject who I was. But you don’t have to do that. That’s not the only way, and it’s probably not even the best way. I just wasn’t strong enough to do anything else.”

“I see.”

“All you really need to do is take a good, hard look at what you want,” Beldo said. “I’m sure you are good at compartmentalizing. But even if you can ignore them, I think you’ll regret it if you let your doubts fester. You need to really think this over and make a decision.” He smiled. “Well, that’s my advice, anyway. I can’t really tell you what to do.”

Lusya blinked. “I will take it under consideration.”

“That’s all I can ask.”

She did not think she would change her mind, but he did have a point. She wanted to see Father revived, but she did also want Ariya to live. As of now, she was siding with the former sentiment, and she did not expect that to change. But it was probably a good idea to give the conflict some proper consideration at some point, rather than ignoring it. Feelings she hid behind the wall were still there and could spill over, after all.

Beldo frowned. “Now, about Ariya, was she an orphan, or…?”

“She was not,” Lusya said. “I killed her family to prevent them from causing trouble while she was away, then deceived her into accompanying me. She does not know of their fate, and you will not tell her.”

He let out a humorless chuckle. “You don’t seem to feel bad about that one.”

“It is unfortunate that knowing would hurt Ariya, and not only for practical reasons,” Lusya said. “But it needed to be done, and I did not make any of them suffer. So, no, I do not feel bad about it in and of itself.”

Beldo sighed. “Well, I won’t tell her. Just think about what I said, all right?”

“I will. I will take first watch, if you would like to rest.”

He nodded. “Sure. Wake me when you’re ready to change shifts. Good night.”